Why is everyone staring at my rainbow sari like that?
This is my gay pride look, people.
If you love your gay friend, and want to support them like I do
then please take a #Gaylfie with them.
And upload it on all social media pages. Everywhere!
Why are you people getting worried, unnecessarily?
This social media and all is utter nonsense.
We need something that
goes straight to the ministers' minds from the people's hearts.
[Phones ringing]
I have received 6,500 missed calls so far.
If I don't support this bill, I will surely lose.
- Aye! - Aye!
Aye! Aye!
[Tanya laughs]
[Title Montage]
[Music playing]
This...
Are you planning to get us killed? This new prime minister...
What? New prime minister?
- We will get trapped! - New prime minister.
Quiet. Keep quiet. What are you doing, Gullu?
How can I calm down? I will get trapped.
Keep calm, Gullu. You have done this before.
- No, but... - Hear me out.
Why are you getting nervous?
I am here. And listen, we're giving you Rs. 5 lakhs, right?
I am here to handle it all.
[Applauding]
- Hello. - [Ashok] The job is done, ma'am.
What, Ashok?
You called your relatives to have Tanya kidnapped!
Yes, ma'am. They're from my village Wasseypur.
But, ma'am, they are thorough professionals.
The business of abducting grooms in Bihar during the wedding season
is actually their monopoly. [Ashok laughs]
Tanya is no ordinary minister, but the prime minister.
And she is guarded at all times throughout the day.
Yes, ma'am, but you seem to have forgotten
that we are in-charge of Tanya's security.
Ma'am, these four will kidnap her
and force her to sign the resignation letter.
She will be sent back to UK, from where we brought her.
Ma'am, Sunday is Tanya's spa-day.
On that day, we'll have her abducted.
[Music playing]
[Cell phone vibrating]
Hello.
Will I have to introduce another bill to meet the Prime Minister?
Prime Minister is always available for her subjects.
Well, in that case, I can have dinner with the PM tonight.
Depends! I am on a Keto diet. Today is a No-Carbs Sunday.
Madam Prime Minister, you don't have to worry about that.
Actually, I know a few interesting ways to burn calories.
See you tonight.
[Chuckles]
[Music playing]
Oh! Ma'am, where are you going?
There was no update of your plan in your security details.
Oh, I don't need any security tonight, Mr. Ashok.
Actually, you all may leave. Take a day off today.
Hey, no. Wait... What?
Ma'am, what are you doing?
You need to have security at all times.
You cannot just change your programmes like that.
Today is your spa-day. Both masseuses are waiting for you.
So, enjoy spa.
Oops. I totally forgot.
You know what, Mr. Ashok? Why don't you do it today?
It's great for your blood circulation.
What if you grow some hair on your head?
You caught my weak nerve.
You should try my favorite protein-based health spa.
You'll totally see the difference.
But, ma'am, I cannot let you go.
You are the Prime Minister of this country.
We cannot put your life at risk. Sorry, ma'am. Please.
[Music playing]
No, ma'am. No!
[Ricky] See, check it out.
Guess what!
Prime Minister can go for a nuclear war but not a dinner date.
What!
What happened, baby?
T, PM cannot go on a date but Tanya can.
But I am the PM. What did you think?
No, no! You don't understand. Just think about it.
What?
Think about it, guys.
[Music playing]
Yes, ma'am.
Hi, Mr. Ashok. We have a change of plan.
And we're going out to jog.
But, ma'am, you just jogged.
Yes, but my 15,000 steps are not completed yet.
Ma'am, what about the people who have come for your spa?
Send them to me after we return.
Cool? Okay, BN.
[Music playing]
Bye!
Ma'am, shall I send the spa people?
[Shrieks]
Why did you come inside?
Why are you looking there? The AC is not working there.
What are you looking at? Get out!
- Close the door. - [Door closes]
[Man] A van has come. What is to be done?
Yes, give security clearance.
You know, I am a little old-school.
I think that when something is cooked on low flame
it becomes more delectable.
[Sachin] Taste lingers longer.
[Laughs]
Let's just say, I like cooking on slow fire.
You know, Sachin, I think I'm more of a salad girl.
Do you understand the meaning of sub-text?
Uh...
I understand the meaning of text.
It is what you have been sending me since a few days.
Sub-text is something that hides the meaning of something relatable.
[Sachin] Anyway, never mind.
I guess, I should be asking you directly, what I want to ask.
Give me your hand.
Oh! [Tanya chuckles]
Oh!
Tanya, when I met you for the first time
I didn't think much of you.
But you know, in the past few months
I've realized that there is some connection between us.
Which language are you speaking?
Because you know, to me, it sounds a lot like...
awesome!
Is that a yes or a no?
It's sub-text.
[Music playing]
[Humming]
[Beeps]
Sprinkle some water.
Ah!
Whom have you brought? You made a grave mistake!
Hey, who are you?
Who are you?
I will tell you.
Yes? Did you get the resignation signed?
Look, we have made a mistake, by mistake.
W-What is the problem?
Actually, they abducted some other girl.
What?
Actually, she had a mud pack on her face, so we got confused.
All right, sir. Give us 50% this time.
Are you out of your mind? 50%?
I will have you people encountered instead.
But, sir...
Crazy people! [Disconnects]
Darn!
He hung up on me.
[Woman] What! How is that possible?
Listen, we have done our job.
And we should get at least half the money.
Be grateful that our lives are spared.
Listen to me, Mom.
We won't get any money now.
Look at her.
She is so beautiful, isn't she?
At least talk about my marriage with her.
Are you crazy? Look at her from top to bottom.
She has imbibed the western culture.
Will she be able to adapt our lifestyle?
But I will be so happy, Mom.
Silly boy.
I-I think, they want you to marry this boy.
- Uh... - Yeah.
Uh-huh!
No f*****g way!
Please agree. Look, all the wedding arrangements are made.
We're just waiting for you to say yes.
Have you looked at yourself in a mirror? I swear to God...
if I was born with a face like yours,
I'd, like, totally sue my parents.
Hey, ma'am,
stop blabbering in English, okay?
I understand everything. I'm not stupid.
Shut up and marry him or get shot in the head.
What are you doing? She's going to be my wife.
What happened?
Let her be alive or my son will become a widower.
Let her be.
Yes. Okay. You want money, right?
You give me the phone,
I'll make a call and you'll have a lot of money.
I promise.
And what if I don't get any money?
"I will marry you and make you my wife!"
[Music playing]
[Cell phone vibrating]
I think, my phone's ringing.
That's okay.
[Sachin] No, no!
[Tanya laughing]
Meera!
Hi, Meera.
Hey, babe. We've been kidnapped by an Indian rural family.
What the hell!
Okay, listen. Just send Mr. Ashok with Rs. 8 lakhs.
And please hurry up. Okay, bye.
Quickly! Quickly!
Well done.
Now, if Mr. Ashok doesn't come with Rs. 8 lakhs,
you will be doomed.
I need to call Mr. Ashok.
Listen, no, no! Give me the phone.
- Why? - No, listen.
We cannot call Mr. Ashok.
If someone finds out that we both are here
and you dodged your security, we'll be in trouble.
Our parties will go berserk.
Listen, you could lose your office.
I might even be fired from my party.
Listen, this is not an option.
What do I do? Let them die?
Delete them from my social networking pages?
Listen.
You must save Meera and Ricky on your own.
Me?
It looks like they might be over there.
Maybe there. Meera sent me the location.
It shows that it's somewhere around here.
It's there!
You did it. Yes.
[Knocking on the door]
Open it. It seems, he's here.
I think, that's Mr. Ashok.
[Door opens]
Oh, my God!
[Music playing]
- Don't move, ma'am. - [Sachin] Easy on her.
Dad, now, we'll have our Rs. 8 lakhs, right?
He's been bad at math since he was little.
He would always fail in math.
You idiot, now we will get double, and not just Rs. 8 lakhs.
Let me call him.
Hey, don't move.
[Cell phone vibrating]
Mom, he didn't answer my call.
What do I do? Kill all four of them?
- No! - No!
We're kidnappers, not murderers.
I cannot do such a thing.
Son, I say, let them go.
- Yes, leave me. - Let us go.
What are you talking about?
If we let them go, the police will track us down.
What did I want? That I have a small house of my own in Patna.
[Man] Kidnappers can have dreams, can't they?
Of course, you can. I believe, everyone should have a home.
Whether it's a murderer or a kidnapper.
[All laughing]
Yes!
Really?
You will get us a government quarter?
Of course! I'll provide government jobs, salary,
your own home and even pension after retirement.
But you must promise me
that you will quit doing crimes.
We've done it already.
- Yes, we will! - We have quit.
We quit right now. Listen, give me that.
We have quit. Yes.
And what about my marriage? Will that be done?
[Tanya laughs]
Of course. I have the perfect girl for you in mind.
[Meera] Tanya!
- I will f*****g kill you. [Laughs]
Not you, babe. Duh!
Aruna!
Welcome to our Annual Meditation Camp.
Today, we have all gathered here
to select someone as the next candidate
to become the prime minister.
We have two names before us.
Renowned minister and former PM Ms. Priyamvada Thakur...
[Applauding]
...and the young Prime Minister Ms. Tanya Thakur.
Long live Tanya Thakur!
Firstly, I would like to invite our party president
Ms. Priyamvada Thakur.
[Cheering and clapping]
Greetings, ladies and gentlemen.
Before I begin my speech, I wish to share some bad news.
I was just informed
that our dear Prime Minister Tanya Thakur
has decided to submit her resignation.
And this morning, she returned to UK.
[Indistinct murmuring]
What is happening?
Please be seated. Please sit.
'I am deeply saddened while writing this.'
'I am not capable of fulfilling all my duties and responsibilities.'
'Hence, I have decided to resign.'
'Your Principal Secretary, Ashok Pandey.'
Ashok...
Are you resigning?
This... This is not the letter.
Long live Tanya Thakur!
- Long live Tanya Thakur! - Hi!
May you long live, Tanya Thakur!
Thank God that you changed your decision.
Everyone was just telling me
that you were resigning and going back to UK.
[Laughs]
What! Why, Grandma? #ILoveMyJob.
- Of course! - Ms. Tanya, you scared all of us.
So, without any delay, let us begin voting.
[Aruna] You need to write one woman's name on the chit
and put it in the ballot box.
So where were you?
Don't ask, Grandma. I had the craziest night.
Meera and Ricky got kidnapped.
Ricky and Meera? Oh!
Ms. Tanya, are you all right?
Of course!
By the way, I've found you a very good-looking guy.
[Music playing]
[Bell dings]
The moment has come.
I have the results with me.
Ms. Tanya has received
90 votes.
Ms. Priyamvada has received...
2 votes.
[Cheering and applauding] [Music playing]
Sorry, ma'am.
[Crackers bursting]
Long live Tanya Thakur!
In the elections of 2018, the candidates for prime minister
are Tanya Thakur from Swatantrata Party
and Sachin Ghatge from Aam Insaan Party.
[Cheering]
Long live Sachin Ghatge!
[TV reporter] As per our sources,
Tanya and Sachin are not just political rivals
but are real life lovers.
Everything is fair in love and war.
Let us see if this love-filled war
will finish with love or rivalry.
[Theme music playing] or rivalry.