WEBVTT

00:00:07.120 --> 00:00:12.360 align:center
The new Prime Minister of the
country. Respected Ms. Thakur.

00:00:12.880 --> 00:00:15.240 align:center
Grandma, who is that?

00:00:15.320 --> 00:00:16.640 align:center
Sachin Ghatge.

00:00:17.400 --> 00:00:18.880 align:center
Opposition party leader.

00:00:18.960 --> 00:00:20.680 align:center
When the prime ministers of our
neighbouring countries will come

00:00:20.760 --> 00:00:23.160 align:center
for the South-Asian Summit...
then you

00:00:25.200 --> 00:00:26.840 align:center
will not be able to survive there.

00:00:27.880 --> 00:00:30.000 align:center
Did I just get, like,
roasted for no reason?

00:00:30.080 --> 00:00:32.840 align:center
These peace talks
must fail anyhow, Ashok.

00:00:32.920 --> 00:00:35.520 align:center
A sleeper cell of terrorists
was caught in Delhi.

00:00:35.600 --> 00:00:37.120 align:center
Can we meet him?

00:00:42.560 --> 00:00:43.640 align:center
This guy?

00:00:43.760 --> 00:00:45.520 align:center
[Chuckles]
That's it?

00:00:45.840 --> 00:00:47.120 align:center
Where is the rest of him?

00:00:48.720 --> 00:00:49.760 align:center
Let me take a selfie.

00:00:49.880 --> 00:00:52.920 align:center
This is our country's
Prime Minister Tanya Thakur.

00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.320 align:center
She is seen taking
a selfie with the terrorist

00:00:55.440 --> 00:00:59.400 align:center
Azgar Bashir Carrim Dawood
of the neighboring country.

00:00:59.520 --> 00:01:01.680 align:center
[Title Montage]

00:01:54.400 --> 00:01:56.320 align:center
Hi, Mr. Aziz.
Welcome to India.

00:01:56.400 --> 00:01:59.960 align:center
Ma'am, this is not Prime Minister
Aziz but his bodyguard.

00:02:00.400 --> 00:02:02.400 align:center
I had shown you Mr. Aziz's picture.

00:02:04.680 --> 00:02:06.440 align:center
[Camera shutters clicks rapidly]

00:02:06.520 --> 00:02:11.200 align:center
Hi, real Mr. Aziz.
Welcome to India and my party.

00:02:11.280 --> 00:02:12.400 align:center
Nice to meet you.

00:02:14.080 --> 00:02:15.640 align:center
Oh, hi!
Nice to meet you.

00:02:15.720 --> 00:02:17.880 align:center
[Camera shutters clicks rapidly]

00:02:20.280 --> 00:02:22.920 align:center
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

00:02:23.600 --> 00:02:25.160 align:center
[Applauding]

00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:27.120 align:center
Based on a recent survey,

00:02:27.200 --> 00:02:29.800 align:center
three out of four politicians
have heart problems.

00:02:29.880 --> 00:02:31.280 align:center
#JustSaying.

00:02:31.560 --> 00:02:36.720 align:center
Hence, I have organized something
special for you all at this summit.

00:02:37.120 --> 00:02:38.200 align:center
Right over there.

00:02:39.680 --> 00:02:41.680 align:center
[Tanya laughs]

00:02:43.120 --> 00:02:46.040 align:center
Anyway, the point is, no tacky

00:02:46.120 --> 00:02:50.000 align:center
only tacos, and that too
whole wheat and gluten free.

00:02:50.520 --> 00:02:51.800 align:center
[Man] Whoa!

00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:55.680 align:center
Enjoy, everybody.
Cheers!

00:02:55.800 --> 00:02:58.160 align:center
What do you call an
earthquake in Urdu?

00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:00.080 align:center
Zalzala.

00:03:00.880 --> 00:03:01.840 align:center
It's here.

00:03:16.440 --> 00:03:17.440 align:center
- Ah!
- Oh!

00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:19.360 align:center
Good evening, Prime Minister.

00:03:20.040 --> 00:03:21.200 align:center
Nice party.

00:03:21.920 --> 00:03:22.920 align:center
Thanks.

00:03:23.280 --> 00:03:25.080 align:center
By the way,
I came here to thank you.

00:03:25.160 --> 00:03:27.680 align:center
For the gluten-free food?
You're welcome.

00:03:28.640 --> 00:03:30.080 align:center
[Sighs]

00:03:30.200 --> 00:03:33.120 align:center
To make my job,
as an opposition leader, easy.

00:03:33.560 --> 00:03:38.160 align:center
You see, people try hard to
humiliate the prime minister.

00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:41.040 align:center
But you...
You make Donald Trump look smart.

00:03:41.120 --> 00:03:42.720 align:center
And it's not a compliment.

00:03:42.800 --> 00:03:45.640 align:center
But we all desperately await
your summit.

00:03:45.760 --> 00:03:47.640 align:center
You know, to know
your thoughts

00:03:47.720 --> 00:03:51.360 align:center
on issues like terrorism,
Kashmir, economy...

00:03:52.160 --> 00:03:53.280 align:center
Kashmir.

00:03:54.320 --> 00:03:56.120 align:center
I hope you have heard
this name.

00:03:56.200 --> 00:03:57.960 align:center
I know everything
about Kashmir.

00:03:58.040 --> 00:03:59.880 align:center
Kashmir is like a pair
of stilettos.

00:03:59.960 --> 00:04:02.680 align:center
India has one shoe
and Pakistan has the other.

00:04:02.760 --> 00:04:04.520 align:center
And they both want
each other's stiletto.

00:04:04.600 --> 00:04:07.440 align:center
And next time, if you try
to troll me in real life

00:04:07.520 --> 00:04:11.040 align:center
I will take my entire PR team
and troll you on SM in such a way

00:04:11.120 --> 00:04:13.600 align:center
that you'll end up deleting
all your accounts.

00:04:14.640 --> 00:04:16.800 align:center
Okay, I'm sorry.
What is this SM?

00:04:17.480 --> 00:04:18.840 align:center
Social Media.

00:04:19.320 --> 00:04:20.680 align:center
What are you, like, 40?

00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:22.920 align:center
[Tanya chuckles]

00:04:49.880 --> 00:04:53.040 align:center
Mr. Aziz, everyone else
has signed this peace treaty.

00:04:53.160 --> 00:04:55.360 align:center
Why should your country
be left behind?

00:04:55.480 --> 00:04:57.800 align:center
Come on, be a little competitive.

00:04:57.880 --> 00:04:59.920 align:center
Go on. Sign it.

00:05:05.720 --> 00:05:08.120 align:center
Madam Prime Minister,
even our country wants peace.

00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:10.520 align:center
But the first condition
on the treaty is that

00:05:10.600 --> 00:05:13.480 align:center
our country should stop
sponsoring terrorism.

00:05:13.840 --> 00:05:15.600 align:center
And this is unacceptable to us.

00:05:16.680 --> 00:05:19.400 align:center
When you say that,
do you mean villager?

00:05:19.520 --> 00:05:21.400 align:center
[Man coughs]

00:05:23.160 --> 00:05:27.560 align:center
Ms. Tanya, what I mean is,
we are not ready.

00:05:27.840 --> 00:05:29.200 align:center
But why?

00:05:29.760 --> 00:05:31.160 align:center
It says here

00:05:31.800 --> 00:05:35.640 align:center
"Our country will dismantle
all terrorist camps"

00:05:35.720 --> 00:05:36.920 align:center
"based in our country."

00:05:37.000 --> 00:05:41.160 align:center
"It will also freeze bank accounts
of all terrorist groups"

00:05:41.240 --> 00:05:42.840 align:center
"operating out of our country."

00:05:42.960 --> 00:05:46.920 align:center
"Our country will also hand over
all terrorists to India,"

00:05:47.000 --> 00:05:49.120 align:center
"involved in 26/11."

00:05:49.800 --> 00:05:51.160 align:center
[Chuckles]

00:05:52.520 --> 00:05:53.720 align:center
What is the problem, sir?

00:05:53.800 --> 00:05:56.960 align:center
Ms. Tanya, if we do not have any
terrorist camps in our country,

00:05:57.040 --> 00:05:59.880 align:center
how can the question arise
of handing them over to you?

00:06:05.840 --> 00:06:06.880 align:center
I understand.

00:06:07.760 --> 00:06:08.920 align:center
You're in denial.

00:06:09.680 --> 00:06:13.040 align:center
That's right. In fact,
Tanya has faced this too.

00:06:13.760 --> 00:06:14.640 align:center
Oh!

00:06:14.760 --> 00:06:16.240 align:center
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

00:06:16.320 --> 00:06:18.280 align:center
I too was in denial.

00:06:18.360 --> 00:06:20.000 align:center
Good thing you reminded me.

00:06:20.440 --> 00:06:22.960 align:center
When I was 18 years old,
I had a boyfriend.

00:06:23.040 --> 00:06:25.080 align:center
He would cheat on me
all the time.

00:06:25.160 --> 00:06:27.880 align:center
All my friends warned me
about him.

00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:30.080 align:center
But I didn't believe anyone.

00:06:30.160 --> 00:06:33.960 align:center
Because just like you,
I too was in denial.

00:06:34.040 --> 00:06:38.080 align:center
Then one day, I caught him
with my friend.

00:06:38.320 --> 00:06:42.800 align:center
That day, I understood that denial
is not just a river in Egypt.

00:06:43.760 --> 00:06:47.080 align:center
Ms. Tanya, our country too
is targeted by terrorists.

00:06:47.200 --> 00:06:50.400 align:center
And you are accusing us
of terrorism.

00:06:52.360 --> 00:06:53.560 align:center
Too Much Urdu.

00:06:53.640 --> 00:06:56.320 align:center
Accusation?
This is not an accusation.

00:06:56.400 --> 00:06:58.200 align:center
We have given you
and your government

00:06:58.280 --> 00:07:00.040 align:center
proof of this many times.

00:07:00.120 --> 00:07:01.680 align:center
And all your proofs
are inadmissible

00:07:01.800 --> 00:07:03.160 align:center
in our court, Mr. Subramaniyam.

00:07:04.520 --> 00:07:06.720 align:center
If you have something valid

00:07:07.640 --> 00:07:09.960 align:center
then present it to us.
We will talk about it.

00:07:10.040 --> 00:07:14.800 align:center
And until this clause
is on this treaty...

00:07:17.360 --> 00:07:20.600 align:center
we are not going to sign
this treaty. Excuse me, gentlemen.

00:07:20.680 --> 00:07:21.920 align:center
[Gasps]

00:07:24.120 --> 00:07:28.400 align:center
This happens every year,
because of Pakistan and India.

00:07:29.120 --> 00:07:32.160 align:center
Peace treaty can never be signed.

00:07:36.080 --> 00:07:37.080 align:center
[Beeps]

00:07:41.000 --> 00:07:44.200 align:center
Ma'am, everything happened
the way you wanted.

00:07:44.280 --> 00:07:45.760 align:center
Congratulations.

00:07:46.120 --> 00:07:49.040 align:center
Ma'am, every channel
and newspaper

00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:52.280 align:center
has together destroyed Tanya.

00:07:52.920 --> 00:07:54.000 align:center
That's it, Ashok.

00:07:55.520 --> 00:07:57.080 align:center
I hope, a day comes

00:07:57.400 --> 00:08:01.040 align:center
when people get so frustrated
of this girl

00:08:01.600 --> 00:08:04.920 align:center
that they come to me
and ask me to be the PM again.

00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:06.880 align:center
Don't worry, ma'am.
It will happen.

00:08:07.560 --> 00:08:10.240 align:center
It's possible that by the time
the summit ends

00:08:11.040 --> 00:08:13.320 align:center
Tanya's prime minister-ship ends.

00:08:13.640 --> 00:08:14.800 align:center
Wait and watch.

00:08:22.040 --> 00:08:23.680 align:center
[Doorbell rings]

00:08:42.440 --> 00:08:44.880 align:center
Ricky, what happened to you?
What are you doing here?

00:08:45.920 --> 00:08:47.960 align:center
[Speaking in a foreign language]

00:08:49.480 --> 00:08:50.800 align:center
[Speaking foreign language]

00:08:51.880 --> 00:08:53.560 align:center
'I went mad in your love.'

00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:56.760 align:center
'I was so lost
that I became pure.'

00:08:57.560 --> 00:08:59.280 align:center
You need an appointment, right?

00:08:59.880 --> 00:09:01.120 align:center
How about an entire lifetime?

00:09:01.920 --> 00:09:03.760 align:center
Okay.
[Chuckles]

00:09:03.840 --> 00:09:05.800 align:center
- I love you.
- I love you!

00:09:07.520 --> 00:09:09.640 align:center
[Music playing]

00:09:16.120 --> 00:09:17.440 align:center
[Both laughing]

00:09:43.400 --> 00:09:44.640 align:center
Riyaz!

00:10:02.640 --> 00:10:03.840 align:center
Prime Minister.

00:10:04.200 --> 00:10:06.880 align:center
You have arranged
this special dinner for us.

00:10:06.960 --> 00:10:08.800 align:center
We are very grateful to you.

00:10:09.120 --> 00:10:10.320 align:center
Oh!

00:10:10.440 --> 00:10:12.880 align:center
I just wanted to break
the ice between us.

00:10:12.960 --> 00:10:13.600 align:center
Yes.

00:10:13.680 --> 00:10:15.160 align:center
Else, the headline
tomorrow would've been,

00:10:15.240 --> 00:10:16.640 align:center
"He's just not that into you."

00:10:16.720 --> 00:10:17.800 align:center
[Tanya giggling]

00:10:17.880 --> 00:10:20.280 align:center
- That's good. That's really good.
- Thank you. Please sit.

00:10:20.360 --> 00:10:21.960 align:center
Sure. Thank you.

00:10:22.920 --> 00:10:24.240 align:center
Mr. Aziz.

00:10:24.520 --> 00:10:27.080 align:center
Because this feast is for you

00:10:27.160 --> 00:10:31.200 align:center
we have invited some special
guests from your country.

00:10:31.280 --> 00:10:33.880 align:center
Firstly, I would like to call

00:10:34.080 --> 00:10:37.280 align:center
the famous Ghazal singer
Ustaad Inayat Ali Khan.

00:10:37.360 --> 00:10:39.080 align:center
- Oh!
- He has personally come here.

00:10:39.160 --> 00:10:40.800 align:center
[Clapping]

00:10:40.880 --> 00:10:43.560 align:center
- Hello.
- [Man] His son is also here.

00:10:43.720 --> 00:10:47.520 align:center
Our second guest is the famous
cricketer Moeen Ali

00:10:48.600 --> 00:10:52.280 align:center
who now does commentary
on an Indian TV Channel.

00:10:52.360 --> 00:10:53.360 align:center
Wow!

00:10:55.720 --> 00:10:58.720 align:center
Madam Prime Minister,
if all guests have arrived

00:10:58.800 --> 00:11:00.320 align:center
shall we begin the feast?

00:11:00.400 --> 00:11:04.560 align:center
I just have one last guest left.
He is from your country.

00:11:04.640 --> 00:11:07.200 align:center
Perhaps, you don't know him
but he knows you.

00:11:07.280 --> 00:11:08.080 align:center
Is it?

00:11:08.160 --> 00:11:12.800 align:center
Ladies and gentlemen, please
welcome Azgar Bashir Carrim Dawood.

00:11:12.920 --> 00:11:14.920 align:center
[Tanya clapping]

00:11:15.360 --> 00:11:17.400 align:center
[Intense music playing]

00:11:20.360 --> 00:11:21.400 align:center
Hi!

00:11:26.080 --> 00:11:28.040 align:center
Hello, sir.

00:11:28.120 --> 00:11:30.680 align:center
- [Ricky] ABCD, how are you?
- Hi, cutie.

00:11:32.480 --> 00:11:34.960 align:center
What the hell is this? What..
Who is this?

00:11:35.080 --> 00:11:38.040 align:center
He is a terrorist, sir.
He's from your country.

00:11:38.160 --> 00:11:40.640 align:center
Our soldiers arrested him
in Daryaganj.

00:11:40.760 --> 00:11:42.160 align:center
What disgusting joke is this?

00:11:42.280 --> 00:11:45.080 align:center
This is no joke.
He is actually from your country.

00:11:45.160 --> 00:11:46.440 align:center
[Azgar] Yes, sir.

00:11:46.520 --> 00:11:50.360 align:center
I am from your village,
let alone your city or country.

00:11:50.960 --> 00:11:54.440 align:center
In fact, your father and my grandpa
would go to school together.

00:11:55.200 --> 00:11:57.520 align:center
I know that you don't know him.

00:11:57.640 --> 00:12:00.440 align:center
But there are a few terrorist
organizations in your country.

00:12:00.520 --> 00:12:03.160 align:center
And he will send you the locations
of them on your Whatsapp.

00:12:03.240 --> 00:12:05.760 align:center
Those people want to send
militants to India

00:12:05.840 --> 00:12:07.840 align:center
who want to attack here.

00:12:07.960 --> 00:12:09.680 align:center
Azgar has just one wish.

00:12:09.800 --> 00:12:11.920 align:center
He wants to go back to his mother.

00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:13.800 align:center
And he has promised me

00:12:13.880 --> 00:12:16.480 align:center
that after this, he will conduct
no attacks against India.

00:12:16.560 --> 00:12:18.000 align:center
[Azgar] Hmm.

00:12:18.120 --> 00:12:20.040 align:center
So, as a gesture of peace

00:12:20.120 --> 00:12:22.880 align:center
we want to hand over Azgar
back to you.

00:12:22.960 --> 00:12:25.880 align:center
When you go back,
please take Azgar with you.

00:12:25.960 --> 00:12:27.240 align:center
What is this nonsense?

00:12:31.360 --> 00:12:32.400 align:center
Madam Prime Minister,

00:12:32.520 --> 00:12:35.000 align:center
you make any actor
come here and say these things

00:12:35.080 --> 00:12:39.320 align:center
and expect all of us here to
believe it that he is our citizen.

00:12:39.400 --> 00:12:42.640 align:center
Madam, this is not politics.
This is not politics!

00:12:42.760 --> 00:12:44.800 align:center
This is drama!
Do you understand that?

00:12:44.880 --> 00:12:48.160 align:center
No, sir. I swear by God
that I am not lying.

00:12:48.440 --> 00:12:52.160 align:center
I am really from your country
and if you wish,

00:12:52.280 --> 00:12:53.920 align:center
you can call my residence
in everyone's presence.

00:12:54.040 --> 00:12:55.200 align:center
Shut up. Keep quiet!

00:12:55.280 --> 00:12:57.800 align:center
Mr. Aziz, why don't you call
on this number?

00:12:58.120 --> 00:13:01.280 align:center
Or accept the fact that
this is valid evidence.

00:13:01.400 --> 00:13:03.800 align:center
That terror camps do operate
out of your country.

00:13:03.880 --> 00:13:06.040 align:center
- Mr. Sarjane, I...
- Mr. Aziz.

00:13:06.400 --> 00:13:08.600 align:center
Please! Please try to understand.

00:13:08.680 --> 00:13:12.400 align:center
This terrorism is eating up
our entire region like termites.

00:13:12.520 --> 00:13:14.640 align:center
- I agree...
- I only request you

00:13:14.720 --> 00:13:17.320 align:center
that you sign
this peace treaty, please.

00:13:17.840 --> 00:13:19.280 align:center
Or, I'm sorry to say

00:13:19.360 --> 00:13:23.000 align:center
we will have to break
all diplomatic relations with you.

00:13:23.120 --> 00:13:23.800 align:center
What!

00:13:23.880 --> 00:13:26.320 align:center
I'm afraid, Sri Lanka
will have to do the same.

00:13:26.400 --> 00:13:27.400 align:center
[Aziz] This...

00:13:27.920 --> 00:13:29.920 align:center
This is utter nonsense.
This is...

00:13:30.200 --> 00:13:32.760 align:center
Why don't you understand?
This is nonsense...

00:13:32.840 --> 00:13:34.040 align:center
I'm sorry, but...

00:13:48.960 --> 00:13:51.360 align:center
Uh, sir! Mr. Aziz.

00:13:52.640 --> 00:13:53.400 align:center
What's the problem?

00:13:53.520 --> 00:13:54.840 align:center
Madam Prime Minister, what is this?

00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:56.400 align:center
Is this your hospitality?

00:13:56.480 --> 00:13:59.520 align:center
You invite guests
and insult them?

00:13:59.600 --> 00:14:01.560 align:center
I don't understand, Mr. Aziz.

00:14:01.680 --> 00:14:03.720 align:center
You should be happy

00:14:03.800 --> 00:14:07.000 align:center
that tomorrow, we'll be
returning your citizen to you

00:14:07.080 --> 00:14:09.120 align:center
at the press conference
before world media.

00:14:09.240 --> 00:14:10.280 align:center
What!

00:14:17.440 --> 00:14:19.680 align:center
What do we do now?
How do we get out of this?

00:14:19.800 --> 00:14:22.280 align:center
You should become the saviour.

00:14:22.600 --> 00:14:25.000 align:center
If we do this,
and sign the peace treaty

00:14:25.080 --> 00:14:27.440 align:center
the entire country
will call me a coward.

00:14:27.520 --> 00:14:30.800 align:center
And if you are seen
getting off an airplane

00:14:30.920 --> 00:14:34.160 align:center
with a terrorist at Islamabad
Airport, what will people think?

00:14:43.120 --> 00:14:44.920 align:center
[Aziz sighs]

00:14:45.000 --> 00:14:49.280 align:center
Madam Prime Minister,
I wish to start afresh and forget

00:14:49.360 --> 00:14:51.400 align:center
whatever differences we had.

00:14:52.360 --> 00:14:54.800 align:center
In fact, I wish to give you
a gift too.

00:14:54.880 --> 00:14:56.640 align:center
- Is it a handbag?
- No, ma'am.

00:14:57.440 --> 00:14:59.720 align:center
It's more precious than a handbag.

00:15:01.560 --> 00:15:03.560 align:center
I want to sign...

00:15:05.160 --> 00:15:06.720 align:center
the peace treaty.

00:15:06.800 --> 00:15:08.000 align:center
Get out!

00:15:08.400 --> 00:15:10.040 align:center
That's amazing.

00:15:11.280 --> 00:15:16.120 align:center
Since we've become friends, I would
want a favour from you.

00:15:16.800 --> 00:15:20.960 align:center
I want you to close this chapter
of the terrorist.

00:15:21.280 --> 00:15:22.320 align:center
What terrorist?

00:15:23.400 --> 00:15:25.840 align:center
Ma'am, Azgar Bashir Carrim Dawood.

00:15:25.920 --> 00:15:26.600 align:center
[Laughs]

00:15:26.720 --> 00:15:28.840 align:center
I know, Mr. Aziz.
It was a joke.

00:15:28.920 --> 00:15:30.200 align:center
Duh-uh!

00:15:30.760 --> 00:15:31.640 align:center
Bring it in.

00:15:31.720 --> 00:15:32.640 align:center
Fist bump.

00:15:32.720 --> 00:15:34.880 align:center
- Like this?
- And we take it out.

00:15:35.640 --> 00:15:36.640 align:center
You got it.

00:15:36.720 --> 00:15:39.320 align:center
[TV reporter] For the first time
in Indian history, together

00:15:39.400 --> 00:15:42.840 align:center
all neighboring countries
signed the peace treaty.

00:15:42.920 --> 00:15:46.520 align:center
The surprising thing is that
Pakistan signed it too.

00:15:47.360 --> 00:15:50.240 align:center
Is this Prime Minister
Tanya Thakur's intelligence

00:15:50.320 --> 00:15:51.960 align:center
or some new trick of hers?

00:15:52.080 --> 00:15:55.800 align:center
Or is it luck
that worked at the right moment?

00:16:01.760 --> 00:16:02.880 align:center
[Applauding]

00:16:03.000 --> 00:16:06.240 align:center
Look, people will keep doubting
Tanya Thakur's abilities.

00:16:06.320 --> 00:16:08.960 align:center
Let us see what happens
in elections.

00:16:09.040 --> 00:16:11.520 align:center
Till then, keep watching me.

00:16:12.640 --> 00:16:14.640 align:center
[Camera shutter clicks rapidly]

00:16:17.600 --> 00:16:20.560 align:center
[Theme music playing]
rapidly]

