1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:04,920 Toni Veronica Elspeth Callaghan, 2 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:10,040 will you marry me? 3 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:24,520 - That doesn't sound like a yeah. - Why? 4 00:00:25,080 --> 00:00:27,760 - Why are you doing this to me? - Because I love you? 5 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,200 And we always talked about getting married one day. 6 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:31,840 One day, one day. Not today. 7 00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:33,600 When we're grown up and settled down. 8 00:00:33,680 --> 00:00:34,960 I hate to break it to you, mate, 9 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:36,560 but we are grown up and settled down. 10 00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:38,200 Don't say that. 11 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:41,200 We're young, and we're wild, and we're free. 12 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:42,480 We own a bread maker. 13 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:45,400 That we don't use, Craig. That we don't use. 14 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:48,200 Where do you think those little warm loaves come from, that you like? 15 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,320 I don't know. 16 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,480 Hey, you can say no, Tone. 17 00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:57,040 - I promise I can handle it. - No, I don't wanna say no. 18 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,960 I just don't wanna say yes, either. 19 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:02,960 - Like, I wish you hadn't asked. - Yeah, me, too, now. 20 00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:05,440 Just think about it, yeah? 21 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:07,040 I don't need an answer right away. 22 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,360 Just roll it round your head for a bit, okay? 23 00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:12,400 Okay. 24 00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:19,640 Craig! 25 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:21,040 Yeah? 26 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,240 What's for breakfast? 27 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:25,000 Freshly baked... 28 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,320 Cornfl... We've got cornflakes, mate. 29 00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:35,200 Aright. 30 00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:36,680 You're living here now, then? 31 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,560 Nah, Mum wanted to be left alone. 32 00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:41,280 She's prepping for one of the legendary all-day poker tournaments. 33 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:43,240 How much prep do you need to play cards? 34 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:44,920 Oh, she were in an ice bath when I left. 35 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:46,760 Says it sharpens the mind. 36 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,880 - You're not invited? - Oh, too rich for my blood. 37 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:52,240 Those ladies come for everything. Even I can't keep up. 38 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:54,120 And, anyway, I've got a shift later. 39 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:56,280 Me, too. Sunday drudgery. 40 00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:58,480 Oh, you're both here, thank God. 41 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:00,440 - What's up with you? - Craig. 42 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,760 - It's Craig. - What? 43 00:02:03,120 --> 00:02:04,680 What's happened? Is he okay? 44 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:09,400 He's asked me to marry him. 45 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:10,880 Oh. 46 00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:13,160 Yeah, he said he were gonna do that. 47 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:14,440 - You knew? - What's the big deal? 48 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:15,600 You're practically married already? 49 00:02:15,640 --> 00:02:18,120 No, no, we're dating. We're boyfriend and girlfriend. 50 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,080 We're going steady. 51 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,560 All right, Sandra Dee, when's the big day then? 52 00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:23,480 - Didn't say yes. - You've turned him down? 53 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:24,560 No! 54 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:26,720 Ran away. 55 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:28,640 Craig really is a lucky man. 56 00:02:28,840 --> 00:02:31,560 Rana, I had to. He kept looking at me with his sad eyes. 57 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:33,680 Listen, can I hide out here with you, Paula? 58 00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:35,400 Sorry, Tone, the grindstone calls. 59 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:37,040 Yep. And for me. 60 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:38,960 Oh, I hope it's better than yesterday. 61 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:40,320 God, that were brutal. 62 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,640 - Had to do a death call. - What's a death call? 63 00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:44,200 - Knock, knock. - Who's there? 64 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:46,040 Police. Your dad's dead. 65 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:47,200 "Your dad's dead." Who? 66 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,040 - Oh, right. - Except it wasn't right. 67 00:02:51,640 --> 00:02:53,920 This fella in Southcoates had a few lads over. 68 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,160 - Bit of FIFA, few tinnies. - Classic night in. 69 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,120 I turn up looking how I do, 70 00:02:58,440 --> 00:02:59,800 and they think I'm a strippergram. 71 00:02:59,840 --> 00:03:02,400 Start yelling, "Get 'em off," and pawing at me handcuffs. 72 00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:04,240 Well, the mood soon changed when I told him 73 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:06,880 his dad had been decapitated in an RTA on the Cottingham Road. 74 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:08,160 - Oh, my God. - Oof! 75 00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:09,880 Today's gotta be an improvement. 76 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:11,360 No, no, no, don't leave! 77 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:13,440 Rana, please. Please! 78 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:15,680 - Where will I go? - Home. 79 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,120 But then I'll have to talk to Craig! 80 00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:19,480 - Exactly. - Paula! Paula. 81 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:20,960 I don't want to be alone. 82 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:22,520 Then get married. 83 00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:27,560 Hiya. 84 00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:37,320 All right, Chris, mate? 85 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:39,520 You've left your undies in my locker. 86 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,840 Oh, word to the wise, mate. 87 00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:44,000 That nylon thong's gonna give you cystitis. 88 00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:46,720 Nah, it's yours Rans. It's for your next house call. 89 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,000 Oh, right. 90 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:49,280 Heard about that then, have you? 91 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:50,640 So did you tell him about his dead dad 92 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:51,880 before or after the lap dance? 93 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,480 - All right, mate, drop it. - Yeah. Drop it like it's hot. 94 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:57,440 ***head. 95 00:03:57,520 --> 00:03:59,560 All right, Rans, just a bit of banter. 96 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,960 Is there a receipt in your locker? 97 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:04,080 Just 'cause I've gotta take all that stuff back? 98 00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:10,320 Paulster. 99 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,000 What we doing outside, Bri? 100 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:13,480 I forgot the key. 101 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:27,320 Blimey, Paulster, that were ace. 102 00:04:34,280 --> 00:04:35,160 How'd you do that? 103 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:36,680 Bluetooth, mate. 104 00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:39,800 Welcome to the Paulster's Sunday session. 105 00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:42,280 I'll put the kettle on. 106 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:45,360 - I love shifts with you. - Of course, you do. 107 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,400 Let's hope it's a quiet one. 108 00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:49,640 No annoying customers. 109 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:54,360 Paula. 110 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:03,440 Craigy. 111 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:04,840 That's a well-pressed shirt. 112 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:07,760 Oh, God, Mum. I totally forgot. I invited you for a roast. 113 00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:10,560 Greetings and salutations, young Craig. 114 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,000 Oh. 115 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,040 A little something for you. 116 00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:16,200 Thanks, mate. 117 00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:20,560 It's a literal and metaphorical clean slate. 118 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,440 A fresh start for all of us. 119 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:26,280 After Toni's appalling behavior last night, 120 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:27,680 where is she? 121 00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:30,480 Having one of her famous lie-ins? 122 00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:33,320 - Quite the slugabed. - No, she's gone out, actually. 123 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,120 After I asked her to marry me. 124 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,520 Oh, Craig. 125 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,360 - Craig! - May I be the first to wish you congratulations 126 00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:44,360 - and felicitations. - Thanks, mate. 127 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:46,600 Actually, she didn't say yes. 128 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,120 Well, in that case, commiserations and consolations. 129 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:51,200 Thanks, mate. 130 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:54,240 Craig. I'm so sorry. 131 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:58,160 Still, plenty more fish in the sea. 132 00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:00,720 That Tash, from my Ramblers group, 133 00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:02,080 was asking after you again. 134 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,840 We're, we're not splitting up. 135 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,640 No, but she's just not sure she wants to marry me, that's all. 136 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:07,880 Then she's a fool. 137 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,160 Any woman would feel lucky to marry you. 138 00:06:11,520 --> 00:06:13,040 - I would. - So would I. 139 00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:14,640 You're a prime catch, young Craig. 140 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:16,160 Reel you in. 141 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:18,240 Just like that. 142 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:19,440 - Reel you in. - Come on. 143 00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:21,480 Come on. Come on. Out you get. 144 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,400 Wahey! Officer Hot Stuff's here. 145 00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:34,520 Have you guys not got any work to do? 146 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:35,960 You know a man died, right? 147 00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:37,600 Well, can I get a private dance, baby? 148 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:41,080 You've got five seconds to get the hell away from me 149 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:42,840 or you'll never be able to enjoy a stripper again. 150 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,680 Ooh, don't be like that, baby. 151 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:50,680 *** you. 152 00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:52,600 Just giving you a tip. 153 00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,040 You shouldn't do that. 154 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:57,720 What's this? A part of service? 155 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,400 - I'm not paying extra. - Shut up! 156 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,080 Oi! Bansal! 157 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:02,960 What the bloody hell is going on? 158 00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:04,400 - Sarge... - She's lost it, boss. 159 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:05,560 We were just having a bit of a laugh. 160 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,480 Inside, now! 161 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,920 Keep your hair on, Rans. And your hat on. 162 00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:15,240 Cor, you can't say anything now, can you? 163 00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:16,360 Did you film it? 164 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:19,040 I wanna make a complaint, sir. 165 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:20,200 What? Against Garrett? 166 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:22,760 - The colleague you just assaulted. - He's been on my case all morning. 167 00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:23,920 What about this stripper thing? 168 00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:26,160 Bloody hell, Bansal. Do you not think you're overreacting? 169 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:28,080 You don't wanna look like you can't take a joke. 170 00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:29,280 It's just a bit of banter. 171 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,040 It's not banter, Sarge, it's sexual harassment. 172 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:33,600 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's a very big word. 173 00:07:33,760 --> 00:07:34,920 Actually, sir, it's two words. 174 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:37,080 Now, don't get smart. I'm trying to help you. 175 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,520 You know, Chris's dad plays squash with the chief constable. 176 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:41,560 Not very often, given the size of the chief constable. 177 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:43,520 What did I just say about getting smart? 178 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,040 The chief constable is very sensitive about his weight. 179 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:48,360 It's just a bit of banter, Sarge, Can he not take a joke? 180 00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:50,720 Now look, 181 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:53,440 professionally, I'm very happy for you to make a complaint. 182 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:54,760 But, personally, 183 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:57,120 I suggest you go and apologize to Chris 184 00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:58,920 and we'll say no more about it. 185 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,680 You want me to apologize to him? 186 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:02,920 I just want a quiet life, Rana. 187 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,120 Good luck with that. 188 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:10,920 What's that? 189 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,320 Cement. 190 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:14,440 Oh, so what's that then? 191 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:17,000 Also cement. It's a pallet of cement. 192 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:18,200 Clear off. 193 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:20,960 I thought, we're not supposed to speak to customers like that. 194 00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:24,400 She's not a customer, Brian. She's my sister, Toni. 195 00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:26,120 Didn't know The Paulster had a sister. 196 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:28,200 - "The Paulster"? - Yeah, it's just a nickname. 197 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,480 So, er, do you work in DIY as well, Toni? 198 00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:32,280 Oh, God, no, never. 199 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:34,480 - I'm an actor. - No way. 200 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:37,040 Never met an actor before. That's really cool, that's really cool, 201 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:37,920 that, innit, Paulster? 202 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,600 Yeah, yeah, yeah, it is. She's going now. 203 00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:41,240 Can you stick the playlist back on, please, Brian? 204 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:42,440 So, have you ever been on tellie? 205 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:44,440 I've done some commercial work, yeah. 206 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:47,120 Yeah, yeah, for Coniston Garden Centre. She was a slug. 207 00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:48,200 Were that you? 208 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:49,320 I loved that slug. 209 00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,000 That way you shriveled up at the end, it were class. 210 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:51,920 "I'm melting." 211 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,680 Do you know what? I improved that line. 212 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:54,760 No, you never. 213 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,720 You stole it from the Wicked Witch of the West. 214 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:58,080 Can you go home, please? 215 00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:59,400 Oh, please don't make me go home. 216 00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:00,760 I can't face Craig. 217 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,720 - Who's Craig? - He wants me to marry him. 218 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:05,240 Ah, well, I bet that happens all the time when you're an actress. 219 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:06,640 Men throwing themselves at you. 220 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,280 It does, actually, God. 221 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:10,480 Must be something about my star quality or... 222 00:09:10,560 --> 00:09:12,000 Oh, for God's sake! 223 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,440 Craig's her partner, Brian. They live together. 224 00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,360 She's pregnant with his child. 225 00:09:16,520 --> 00:09:17,400 Just marry him. 226 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:18,880 Marriage is what boring people do. 227 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,920 I've been married for 17 years, Toni. 228 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,280 Yeah, Paula. 229 00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:25,560 And I don't want to end up like you, married... 230 00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,280 and working in some factory. 231 00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:30,160 It's a DIY store, Toni. 232 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:31,640 Well, she has got a point, Paulster. 233 00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:34,040 I mean, she doesn't wanna end up boring like me and you. 234 00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:35,680 Like me? 235 00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:41,760 - Hey up, customer alert... - No, no, no. No. I can handle it. 236 00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:44,400 You stay chatting to Toni. 237 00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:46,080 She's the interesting one. 238 00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:48,920 So, have you done any soaps? 239 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,360 I don't really see myself as a soap actress. 240 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,080 - I'm more classical. - Ah, right. 241 00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:55,280 Just 'cause I've got a cousin that worked on Emmerdale. 242 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:57,480 I mean, I love Emmerdale, God. 243 00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,160 Yeah, I'd be great on Emmerdale. 244 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,480 Just see me with a shepherd's crook. 245 00:10:02,640 --> 00:10:05,040 Do you think he could get me an audition? 246 00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:08,480 Er, well, I could ask. I mean anything for The Paulster's sister. 247 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:09,680 "Anything"? 248 00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:11,320 Great. 249 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:15,480 How's the gammon looking, John? 250 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:17,520 Responding very well to my touch. 251 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:20,120 Ooh. I know how it feels. 252 00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:24,680 Still not heard from Toni, Mum. 253 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:25,960 Imagine if she says no. 254 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:28,080 Just always dreamt we'd get married one day. 255 00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:29,560 I know, love. 256 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:31,640 You used to hold weddings for all your teddies. 257 00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,120 John doesn't need to hear that. 258 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:34,880 Oh, don't worry about that, young Craig. 259 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:36,800 I've already seen the photographs. 260 00:10:37,560 --> 00:10:38,360 Brilliant. 261 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:41,280 You know, marriage isn't always the answer. 262 00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:43,720 It can complicate things. 263 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,480 Look at me and your father. 264 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:48,840 Marriage isn't the reason Dad slept with all those other women, Mum. 265 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:51,000 It was his philandering soul. 266 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:52,480 Damn his eyes. 267 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:56,200 Imagine going out for burger when you've got steak at home. 268 00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:59,360 Still, his loss is my gain. 269 00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:04,200 John and I are clear, we'll leave our own knot untied. 270 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,880 But we may make a home together. 271 00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:10,240 Oh, wow, Mum, that's moving really fast. 272 00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:11,720 Don't worry, Craig. 273 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,960 You'll always be my best boy. 274 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:16,800 Mine, too. 275 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:21,560 But wherever I roam, 276 00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:24,440 my heart will always be at Emmerdale Farm. 277 00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:26,640 Was that all right? 278 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:28,200 I've never actually watched Emmerdale. 279 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:29,320 It were all right, yeah. 280 00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:31,040 No, I didn't feel it. Let's go again. 281 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:32,360 It's got to be perfect for your cousin. 282 00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:34,520 Oh, I will send it off to him, Toni. It's just that, 283 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:36,520 he only fixed wall at Wool pack that one time, 284 00:11:36,600 --> 00:11:37,920 and I don't know how much sway he's got. 285 00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:39,600 He'll have made contacts though. 286 00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:40,680 - Will he? - Yeah. 287 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:42,880 It's how the industry works. It's who you know. 288 00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:45,000 You know, wheels within wheels and backroom deals! 289 00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,360 - Right. If you say so. - Yeah. Let's go again. 290 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:50,240 There's a delivery out back that needs bringing in, Brian. 291 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:51,920 When you've got a minute, yeah. 292 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,320 I mean, only if you've got time. 293 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:54,840 All right, Paulster, I'm coming right now. 294 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,600 No, no, no, no, no. One more. One more. 295 00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:59,320 Look, I always get into my stride around take 28. 296 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:00,920 You don't mind, do you, Paula? 297 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,560 No. No, I don't mind at all. 298 00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:04,840 Cool ice, me. You get Toni's take. 299 00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:06,400 *** the Paulster. 300 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:07,360 Great. 301 00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:09,960 I better go, really, ain't I? She's a bit het up. 302 00:12:10,040 --> 00:12:12,160 Oh, God, that's just Paula, she's always like that. 303 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:13,720 The Paulster's chillaxed to the max. 304 00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:15,520 "Chillaxed"? Have you seen her do a big shop? 305 00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:17,000 You don't know her like I do. 306 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:18,240 Well, I do know her a little bit. 307 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:20,200 I've been working with her for quite a while now, 308 00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:22,400 and from day one, she's always been The Paulster. 309 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,480 Well, I've been a sister for 35 years, 310 00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:27,480 and when I'm around, she's always stressed. 311 00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:29,240 - Yeah, there's a mystery. - Let's go again. 312 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:31,920 Brian, really try and capture what I'm giving you, okay? 313 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:32,840 Come a bit closer. 314 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,160 Erm, okay, I'll do it from that other bit. 315 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:39,240 There's something wrong with these sheep, Mr. Fothergill. 316 00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:40,840 Mmm-hmm. 317 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,400 There's something wrong with these sheep, Mr. Fothergill! 318 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:45,440 Paulster? 319 00:12:45,720 --> 00:12:47,000 Are you all right? 320 00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:48,240 Yeah. 321 00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:51,160 It's just a bruised coccyx. I'm fine. 322 00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,800 Oh, careful, Paula. 323 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:56,080 You ruined that take. 324 00:12:59,840 --> 00:13:02,160 - Hiya, Sharon. - Here, Rana, 325 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:04,320 You seen this? 326 00:13:04,560 --> 00:13:08,000 Oh, my God. He's downloaded Photoshop. 327 00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,440 It was up in the break room. Who? 328 00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:12,160 Who do you think? Chris bloody Garrett. 329 00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,840 Of course, "The Archbishop of Banterbury." 330 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:16,640 Someone ought to teach that boy a lesson. 331 00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:17,920 Except they can't, can they? 332 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,720 'Cause his dad's tight with the chief constable. 333 00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:22,400 - He's untouchable. - I dunno know, love. 334 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,080 I don't think anyone's untouchable. 335 00:13:24,160 --> 00:13:26,480 You just have to work out how to touch them. 336 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:30,520 - Where is he? - Out on patrol. 337 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:32,160 Do you know anyone in dispatch, Sharon? 338 00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:34,520 I've got a few friends. He's got a few enemies. 339 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,960 - How would they feel about doing us a favor? - Hello, love. 340 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,160 Mum, hiya. How's it going? 341 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:41,160 Just bagged Cathy's Ford Mondeo. 342 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:42,640 Cathy's Mondeo? 343 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,200 Nice. 344 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:46,320 Listen, erm... 345 00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:47,720 Do you think you and your ladies 346 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:49,160 would be able to do something for me? 347 00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:50,240 Yes. 348 00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:58,000 Why didn't you tell me Barry's cousin works for Emmerdale? 349 00:13:58,040 --> 00:13:59,600 Barry? He's called Brian. 350 00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:01,760 - You all right? - Yeah. 351 00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:05,160 Off in a hot bath and a bugger load of codeine won't sort. 352 00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:06,680 You know your problem, don't you? 353 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:08,600 - What? - You never ask for help. 354 00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:10,200 You don't see me lifting cement. 355 00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:12,160 Oh, so that's my problem, is it? 356 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,640 Not my little sister herding pretend sheep down the plumbing aisle. 357 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,520 Well, yeah, that, and the help thing. 358 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:20,840 Just go home, Toni, please, 359 00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:22,840 and leave me to my grout and my stop***, 360 00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:24,320 'cause I was happy with my stop***. 361 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,280 Please don't make me go home, Craig'll... 362 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:27,800 What? Ask you to marry him? 363 00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,280 What's so scary about that? 364 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:30,880 I just don't wanna be tied down. 365 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:32,480 What if this Emmerdale thing happens. 366 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:33,400 It won't. 367 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:35,160 Brian's cousin can't help ya, 368 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:36,960 unless you need a wall skimming. 369 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:38,560 Just grow up! 370 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,040 I'm just... 371 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:43,560 I'm still waiting for my big break, like... 372 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:44,640 - What if... - What? 373 00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:46,600 Something better comes along? 374 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,120 You're 35. 375 00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:50,440 You're five months gone and you live in Hull. 376 00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,200 Spielberg isn't calling. 377 00:14:52,440 --> 00:14:54,320 You don't know that. He might have seen my slug. 378 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:55,960 He didn't see your slug. 379 00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:57,320 No one did. 380 00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:59,160 Go home and say yes 381 00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,040 to that nice man who wants to marry you, 382 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,400 because then you'll be his problem and not mine. 383 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,040 Yeah, well, Barry saw my slug, actually, 384 00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:07,200 - and he *** loved it. - It's Brian. 385 00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:10,600 He loved it! 386 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:14,720 Yeah, I reckon that's all sorted now, no harm done. 387 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,000 What's happened to Toni? 388 00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:18,000 She's just made a dramatic exit. 389 00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:19,520 Oh, that's a relief. 390 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:21,400 What? I thought you loved her. 391 00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:24,760 I know she's your sister, but Christ, she's hard work, Paulster. 392 00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:26,760 Yeah, I know. 393 00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,320 She's a literal pain in the arse. 394 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,400 Yeah, I bet. 395 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,560 She's obviously a little bit lost without you, though. 396 00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:34,400 Do you reckon? 397 00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:36,120 She's lucky to have you, Paulster. 398 00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:41,800 Has she took me phone? 399 00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:49,280 Police, open up! 400 00:15:50,760 --> 00:15:51,560 Hello. 401 00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:53,560 We got a complaint about noise from this address. 402 00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,040 - Have you now? - Can I come in? 403 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,560 I think you'd better, Officer. 404 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:58,480 It has been very loud, you know. 405 00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,600 We've had a fair few Screaming Orgasms. 406 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:02,480 You what? 407 00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:04,840 I'm afraid we've been very, very bad girls, 408 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,160 Ladies! He's here! 409 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,440 You don't understand! I'm a real police officer! 410 00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:10,960 - Wha... - Get hold of his truncheon! 411 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:12,480 Don't put your hand there! 412 00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:14,840 Hey, don't touch that! 413 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,200 - Hiya. - Hey up. 414 00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:24,160 Where have you been? 415 00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:25,840 We were supposed to have lunch with Mum today. 416 00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,360 It doesn't matter now. I've got an answer for you. 417 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:30,560 Yeah? 418 00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:31,960 Yeah. 419 00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,320 I'll marry you. 420 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:37,440 - Oh, mate. - Yeah. 421 00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:40,720 I'll settle down and I'll be your wife. 422 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,720 Oh, that's great, Toni. 423 00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:45,760 - I love you. - Yeah, I love you, too. 424 00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,680 And, erm... 425 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,360 I want you to, 426 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,560 er, teach me how to use the bread maker. 427 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,160 It's really simple. You just... 428 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:56,040 Just pour flour in the top bit... 429 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:02,480 - Is everything okay? - Yeah. 430 00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:07,680 I'm never gonna be a star. So I might... 431 00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:12,080 Yeah. So I might as well, erm, yeah, get married. 432 00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:15,240 Maybe you are a star, that's why I wanna marry you. 433 00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:17,720 Oh, no, it's okay, Craig. Look, Paula set me straight. 434 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:21,240 I'm just a woman in Hull, and that's all I'll ever be. 435 00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:22,480 So, 436 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,320 let's get married 437 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:26,520 Erm. 438 00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:29,040 Yeah. 439 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:30,880 I've got the flour. 440 00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:33,480 What does the bread maker look like? 441 00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:35,520 And where do you keep it? 442 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:37,800 Come here. No, no. 443 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:39,560 Let's not... 444 00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,120 - Let's not get married. - No? 445 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:45,240 But that's what you want. 446 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:46,920 I want to be with you. 447 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:48,800 I am. 448 00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:51,080 I think we've got a good thing going. 449 00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:52,960 That's what I think. 450 00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:55,400 Then let's not mess with it, eh? 451 00:17:58,080 --> 00:17:59,960 Oh, God, Craig. 452 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:07,040 You're the only person in the world I want to not marry. 453 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:10,400 You're a knobhead. 454 00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:12,760 I know. 455 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,320 All right, Chris? 456 00:18:17,720 --> 00:18:18,760 Good shift? 457 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:21,640 - Anything to report? - Nothing of note. 458 00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:27,160 Go on, mate, give us the full debrief. 459 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:29,120 - Get 'em off, Chris. - Stop laughing! 460 00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:30,680 It's not funny. Their hands were everywhere! 461 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,120 Oh, just a bit of banter, mate. Can you not take a joke? 462 00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:35,160 Buy yourself some nice undies. 463 00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:37,840 - Little tip, cotton gussets. - Get lost! 464 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:40,840 Aw, you just can't say anything these days. 465 00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:43,280 Come on, Chris, don't cry. 466 00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:45,360 The little baby. 467 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,680 Hmm. They're doing Mary Poppins at Hull's new theatre. 468 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:02,840 I'd be brilliant in that. 469 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:03,800 Of course, you would. 470 00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:05,680 You're practically perfect in every way. 471 00:19:05,760 --> 00:19:06,760 Aw, that's sweet. 472 00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:08,760 - No, it's a line from the... - Doesn't matter. 473 00:19:08,760 --> 00:19:10,920 I wonder if I know anyone who could get me an audition. 474 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:21,840 Give us a minute, Craig. 475 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,800 Yeah, sure. Can you just keep an eye on the pan for me, though? 476 00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:36,600 I think The Paulster 477 00:19:37,360 --> 00:19:39,280 might have been a bit out of line 478 00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:40,880 earlier. 479 00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,240 Oh, that's all right. 480 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:48,200 I'd probably be pissed off if you came bothering me at work. 481 00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:49,960 What work's that exactly? 482 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:54,320 You're right, Toni. It's your life. 483 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,520 Who am I to tell you how to live it? 484 00:19:57,040 --> 00:19:58,040 Spoke to Craig? 485 00:19:58,120 --> 00:19:59,560 - Yeah. - And? 486 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,280 We're not gonna do it. 487 00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:03,640 I'm not cut out to be a wife. 488 00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,480 It's far too much cooking and cleaning. 489 00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:07,480 - How's that pan looking, Tone? - It's fine. 490 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,480 - You wanna stay for tea? - Yeah. 491 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:12,000 - Craig, one more for tea. - Righto! 492 00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:17,440 It is exhausting fighting misogyny. 493 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:19,600 I had to drive to Grimsby to get a disco ball. 494 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:20,920 But long story short, 495 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:22,480 I won and I need a drink. 496 00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:23,800 Craig! Get Rana a drink. 497 00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:25,400 They only think about themselves. 498 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:26,720 Bloody men. 499 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,760 I wouldn't say no to one of those, Craig. 500 00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:32,960 - Do you wanna stay for tea? - Ta. 501 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,080 - Oh, yeah, go on, then. - Rana's staying for tea. 502 00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:37,640 - Okay, Cool. - Hey, little peanut. 503 00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:39,800 Hey, it's your favorite Aunty Rana. 504 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:40,800 Favorite... 505 00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:42,240 Oh, babe, get the phone for me, please. 506 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:43,640 I'm not your secretary, Craig. 507 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,200 - Okay, I'll get it... - See, this is why I don't believe in marriage. 508 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:49,120 Men expect their wives to do everything for 'em. 509 00:20:49,120 --> 00:20:50,840 - Hello. - Chin chin. 510 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,400 - Bloody hell, Paula. - Smash those glasses. 511 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:54,920 You still puking in the morning? 512 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,360 No, I'm just *** knackered. And I've got piles. 513 00:20:57,520 --> 00:20:59,480 No, no, well, of course, I do. 514 00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:01,200 Smell the wine. 515 00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:03,000 - Get a whiff of that. - Right. Okay. 516 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:06,120 Yeah, Yeah. Okay. Goodbye. 517 00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:07,640 You two not getting hitched then? No. 518 00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:10,160 No, no, we're gonna keep everything exactly the way it is now. 519 00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:13,320 What? What's the matter? 520 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:15,040 It's the landlord. 521 00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:16,640 He's selling the house.