WEBVTT

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I want to see who's behind that door.

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Uh…

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Alicia, do as I say.

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Okay, go ahead,
ruin her surprise. Take a look.

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- Take a look. Please go ahead.
- Yeah.

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- Of course, I'm going to look.
- Go ahead.

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Why don't you take a look?

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- Hi!
- Hi. Oh, Uncle Kuku is my birthday gift.

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- But why here?
- All of us together on this coming Sunday.

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Monday. It is Monday this Sunday.

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- Twinkle!
- Oh-oh, Dharmendra, this is Twinkle.

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- Twinkle, this is Dharmendra!
- Oh, hi! Nice to meet you.

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What's with the "nice to meet you"?
Just give me your lipstick, please.

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Oh, here they are.
You can take all of them.

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Huh? Thank you.

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Hey, listen, listen.
Why don't you take her along?

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Where should I take her now?

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It's her birthday. It's a surprise.

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- Oh, yeah. Surprise, surprise!
- Ah…

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Go, go, go with him.

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Let's move from here. Come on.

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Give us one.
Take him with you. Move him from here.

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- Bye!
- Bye!

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Oh, God!

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That was close.

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Oh, God!

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Let's begin the rehearsal now.

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What?

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May I come in?

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Hi!

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No, no. You're Dr. Micky.
Get your stethoscope out.

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I hope this Sunday comes soon
and we get over this,

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"Mission Micky exposé."

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Hmm, but before that, it's time for
"Operation Full Monty Scene."

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And also, "Operation Murder."

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Freddy, you dog! You pig!

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Mamma was planning to murder me

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and you decided to tell me about it
when you were high on drugs?

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You done with your nonsense?

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Freddy, you idiot!

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Do you really think
that I will murder Hutoxi, huh?

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I'm such a non-violent…

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…peace-loving noble lady.
Can I even think of murdering someone?

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Mamma, but you are not
100% non-violent either.

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With Papa, you were just…

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With your papa what?

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You used to throw things at Papa.

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And sometimes
you would just throw Papa onto things.

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And do you remember that one Sunday?

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You duffer! That Sunday,
first your papa started it.

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He threw a box
full of 20, 30 wooden sticks at me.

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- Freddy?
- A matchbox.

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A tiny little matchbox.

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He threw a matchbox
with 20, 30 matchsticks at you.

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And, Mamma,
didn't you also throw something?

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I only threw a tiny little
pressure cooker whistle at him.

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Listen, Mamma,
that tiny little pressure cooker whistle

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was still attached
to a huge pressure cooker.

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That's what hit papa on his face
while it was piping hot.

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So what? Does that mean that I will
actually ever try to murder Hutoxi?

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No, I agree.
Sometimes I feel like killing her.

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I feel like taking her
on the top of Mount Everest

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and pushing her down the slope.

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But you think I could ever do that?

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Absolutely not.

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How can Mount Everest
be summited by Mount Kilimanjaro?

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One-zero.

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Darling Hutoxi just demolished you, Mamma.

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No! You are not going
to do this film, okay?

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Kiran, please.

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That's it. End of discussion.

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Why? Why? Why?

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- Why can't Dharam do this film? Hmm?
- Yeah.

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What? "Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm"?

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He wants to run naked
on the streets of New York.

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Yes, so what's the problem with that?

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See, there are a lot of designer stores
in New York, okay?

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So he can walk into any store,
do shopping and just wear those clothes.

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Hey!

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- Twinkle!
- Yeah?

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Listen, I don't want to go to New York
and shop naked.

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I want to shoot for a movie naked.

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Yeah, but the stores will still be there.

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So innocent, Dharmendra.

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Hey, come on, now. Be reasonable, Kiran.

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It's a Hollywood film.
And it's a small scene.

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Like six minutes.

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- Just six minutes?
- Yeah.

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And before the intermission,
there's another four-minute nude scene.

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And right before the climax,

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there's another small
three-minute nude scene as well, right?

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Not to mention the two-minute nude scene
that's going to be in the trailer.

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But the trailer
will be cut from the movie, right?

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I will not have to run naked
for that again, don't worry.

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No, I mean, in total, you'll be seen naked
for around 13 minutes in the film.

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- Exactly.
- Hmm.

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What's the problem with that?

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Why are you encouraging him?

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You're also from the creative field.

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What if a situation
like this arises in your life?

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Hey, you know exactly
what has happened in my life, Priyanka.

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You know,
when I had just joined the ad agency,

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there was a senior actress, Surekha Devi.

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Of course!

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The moment she entered, she would just
come and kiss me on my lips.

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And that too after having garlic.

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Oh, Lord! You didn't do anything about it?

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Of course I did.

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I told the canteen guys
to not put garlic in her dip.

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Put something else like mint.

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But they just wouldn't listen to me.

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And-and, Kiran, listen,
I tell you, my father…

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- What?
- In 1956, he shot for an ad for some soap.

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And he was completely naked.

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You see? 1956!

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In 1956!

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His father was just six months old then.

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And it was an ad for Jackson's Baby Soap.

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Yeah, I mean, as people say,
"Age is just a number."

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You henpecked boy.

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- And, you, Hutoxi.
- Hmm?

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Tell me the truth. Don't you ever
feel like you want to murder me?

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- Everyday!
- Told you.

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- Huh?
- Come here. I'll show you.

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- Hey, where the hell are you going?
- Come, Mamma. Let's see.

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Come with me, I'll show you.

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I practice darts on your picture everyday.

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Yeah, so that's okay.

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But you have never actually thrown darts
at my pretty face.

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- Have you ever done that?
- I haven't yet. No.

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Yeah, so same.
Even I only think about killing you.

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No, Mamma.
I have heard it with my own ears.

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Didn't you tell Aunty Ruby
over a phone call that,

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"I'll first cut off her head."

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Oh, my God!

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- The one who says it is a fool.
- You hear that?

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And the one who believes it
is a bigger fool.

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Now, you see, it's our dear
Twinkle's birthday next month.

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So I thought I'll make
a whole roast chicken for her.

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I was talking to Ruby about chopping off
that chicken's head, duffer.

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Oh, that head? Okay.

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Hey, Hutoxi. You know me well, my dear.

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I hate you.

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But I'll go smack-smack-smack-smack
across your face.

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Slap you ten times
and throw you out of the house.

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I don't hate you enough to murder you.

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Lovely.

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How sweet!

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- Mamma.
- Yes, my dear?

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- Hutoxi.
- Yes, baby?

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We always laugh-play
and solve all of our conflicts, right?

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Hmm.

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And we make the married life
between the three of us better.

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Mamma, you remember that restaurant,
"Umang's lotus by Vanita?"

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They've launched an unlimited buffet
for 999.

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- Chicken, seafood, lamb, everything!
- What are you saying?

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Let's all go this Sunday, huh?

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- Um, no! Not this Sunday.
- Why?

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You see the thing is, uh…

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I need to get Dharmendra ready.

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He's playing
a young beautiful bride this time.

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Okay, okay, okay.
Go and shoot for your sleazy film.

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Yes!

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I just have this one small condition.

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- Yes, yes, yes, tell me.
- Hmm.

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- Us five couples…
- Hmm?

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Uncle Nari And Vishnusharman.

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They will all be coming home for lunch.

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And you will serve food to everyone.

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This is your condition?
I just have to serve them?

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- Yeah.
- Okay.

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But stark naked.

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Oh! Spicy.

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First, in front of your friends,
show us that you can strip.

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If you can do that,
then go and do the film.

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All right. Challenge accepted.

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Naked luncheon this Sunday.

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Uh, no, no, no.
Not on Sunday, not on Sunday.

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- Why?
- Uh, so…

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You tell him, tell him, tell him fast.

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I'll tell you. On Sunday, they're going
to Aunty Rajni's place to get her ready.

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Aunty Rajni
is finally going on a date with Ronit.

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- Yeah.
- What fun?

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Rajni.

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When you were high that day,

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whatever you had told me,
I hope you remember.

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Yeah, of course she remembers.

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I've shown her the video so many times.

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She's probably memorized the whole thing.

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Uncle Kuku.

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- Mr. Ronit.
- Hmm?

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You keep asking me
to go out on a date with you.

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Hmm.

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- And I keep turning you down every time.
- Mmm.

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- Do you know why?
- Mm-mm.

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Because I am scared,
scared, scared, scared.

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Rajni. What are you so scared of?

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That I will…

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How do you say it? Heh.

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That I'll fall in love with you.

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So what? Motherly love for a son.

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- It's such a sweet thing.
- Uncle Kuku. What?

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Oh, God! What do I do?

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Where do I, where do I, where do I…

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- Hey, where do I what?
- Where do I go and bash my head?

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This is not a mother-son thing, all right?

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This is love between two lovers.

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Yeah, yeah, lovers' love, lovers' love.

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I am free now.

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Can't I finally live a little for myself?

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But then what if… what if he…
What's your name, son?

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- Ronit.
- Yeah, yeah. What if…

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Omit goes…

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Uh, goes ahead and proposes to you, then?

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So what?

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I'm not going to leave you here alone
and go to my new marital home.

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Hey, hey! One sec, hold on.

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So after getting married,
you'll get Uncle Kuku to my house?

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Yes, of course. At such a tender age,

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I can't just drop him off
to live alone at an old-age home.

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- Excuse us. Come here.
- What?

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What happened?

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Please, just make sure that
at least on our honeymoon, Kuk's--

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On the honeymoon, just you and I.

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Thank you.

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He'll be staying next door
in the connecting room.

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You are not serious.

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You're telling me that on our honeymoon,
Uncle Kuku will also come along?

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Do you really think
I should leave him alone

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with the house help taking care of him?

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Hmm. Point.

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Listen.

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- Rancid!
- Yeah?

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Hey, I'm saying
why even go through so much trouble?

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Why shouldn't I go through it?

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Tell me, can't I live a little for myself?

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- Hey, Uncle Kuku.
- Yeah.

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- Can you come here?
- Yeah, yeah.

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Hey, not from there. Come around.

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- Yeah, yeah.
- Come here.

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So, here's a thought.

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So if I propose to you
for marriage tomorrow,

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and if you say yes.

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- Then…
- Then?

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Then?

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Then I promise you this, Rajni,

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for the rest of my life,
I will always take care of Uncle Kuku.

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- Promise?
- Of course, it's a promise.

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Hey.

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- Tonic.
- Yeah?

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My ex-wife forgot how to laugh
like that demoness.

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Oh…

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The whole truth is already out.

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Now you can't make any excuses
to not go on a date with me. Hmm?

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No. She won't make any.

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The two of us will definitely
go on a date with you.

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All right, then.

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The date is set. So next Sunday,
you're having lunch with me. Both of you.

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We'll come on Sunday for sure.

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Hey, just a sec. Just a sec.
Not on Sunday.

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There's an operation on Sunday.

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Operation? What happened?
Everything all right?

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I'll tell you.

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<i>Then what happened on Sunday</i>
<i>was, oh, my God!</i>

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- Listen carefully, you insect.
- Yes, sir.

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Catch that disgusting meningitis germ
Micky in action, red-handed.

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"Operation expose Micky"
will happen today.

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- I know that, sir.
- Hmm.

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Here. I wanted you to call Priyanka
from my phone.

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- Okay, sir.
- Come, son, have some breakfast.

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- No, no, sir. You please continue.
- Okay.

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I had it long ago.

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Eat the doughnuts,
they are very good. Enjoy.

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Just call Priyanka!

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Adi, I'm leaving now.

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Wait, Priyanka.

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I've made
cottage cheese sandwiches for you.

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Uh, but I have to… I have to take
Uncle Kuku to the doctor right now, okay?

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But I thought you were going to get
Aunty Rajni ready for something, right?

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Yeah, so I'll do that as well. Aunty Rajni
can't go to the doctor just like that.

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She needs
to get properly dressed and ready.

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- Why?
- What do mean why?

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What if there's a, uh,
wedding going on there?

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And what if there's a funeral?

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Then she'll get rid of the jewelry.

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Why are you arguing
so much with me in the morning?

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But, listen, sandwiches are okay
for both the occasions. Priyanka, listen…

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Bye. Bye!

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Hey, Priyanka!

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You forgot your phone.

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- Hello?
- Hello? Yeah, Priyanka ma'am?

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No, no, Priyanka forgot
her phone at home. This is Adi here.

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Yeah, yeah. So is, uh, Uncle Nari there?

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Yeah, he's here.

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Okay, then please put him on the phone,

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I want to read him the invitation
I've made for Twinkle's birthday.

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Yeah, yeah, sure.

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Sir, Priyanka ma'am's phone is connected.

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Here you go.

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- Hello. Priyanka my dear?
- No, Uncle, I'm--

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<i>Listen…</i>

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Before Alicia exposes Micky to everyone,

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I want to give her a diamond bracelet.
I'm sending it to you. Okay?

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Okay. I'll give it to her.

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Yeah. What happened
to your voice, Priyanka?

14:48.065 --> 14:51.425
Yeah, so Priyanka left her phone at home,
but took her voice along.

14:51.505 --> 14:53.305
- This is Adi speaking.
- What?

14:53.385 --> 14:55.225
Yeah, so don't worry,

14:55.305 --> 14:57.665
I'm going to figure out the plan
that you've made to expose Micky.

14:57.745 --> 15:00.945
For now, I've made this little jingle
for Twinkle's birthday invitation,

15:01.025 --> 15:02.265
you want to hear it?

15:02.345 --> 15:04.945
<i>It's an invitation for her birthday…</i>

15:05.025 --> 15:08.185
Just two minutes, two minutes.
I'll call you back in two minutes.

15:08.265 --> 15:11.985
You monster! Demon! You useless fellow!
It was Adi on the line.

15:12.065 --> 15:13.865
I know that.

15:13.945 --> 15:16.345
But I had made a phone call
to Priyanka ma'am.

15:16.425 --> 15:17.665
If Adi sir answered, what do I do?

15:17.745 --> 15:19.745
You-- Why didn't you tell me?

15:19.825 --> 15:23.105
I just told Adi what we are up to.
You filthy creature!

15:23.185 --> 15:26.825
- Adi. Adi, have you seen my phone?
- Here it is.

15:27.825 --> 15:30.665
By the way, Uncle Nari just told me
on the phone that, uh,

15:30.745 --> 15:32.745
you guys are planning
to expose Micky today.

15:32.825 --> 15:33.705
Huh? Uh…

15:33.785 --> 15:36.825
Now whatever the plan is
you can tell me later.

15:36.905 --> 15:38.825
For now, I'll just go
and warn Micky about it.

15:38.905 --> 15:40.945
No, no, no. Adi, you cannot tell
any of this Micky, please.

15:41.025 --> 15:42.865
But Micky is my best friend.
What are you saying?

15:42.945 --> 15:44.185
But Twinkle
is also your best friend, right?

15:44.265 --> 15:47.105
- Yeah, she is. I'll tell Twinkle as well.
- What? Adi.

15:47.185 --> 15:50.185
They have such a happy marriage,
why do you-- Whoa!

15:59.425 --> 16:00.825
Adi!

16:10.745 --> 16:13.545
Why the hell
isn't Priyanka answering her phone?

16:13.625 --> 16:15.225
Why didn't you try calling Priyanka
from your phone?

16:15.305 --> 16:16.465
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

16:19.265 --> 16:20.945
Hello, yeah, Priyanka?

16:21.025 --> 16:23.665
Hello, Vishnusharman. How are you?

16:23.745 --> 16:25.985
Yeah, I'm fine.
Sir, wanted to talk to you.

16:26.065 --> 16:26.985
Sure. Put him on the line.

16:27.065 --> 16:29.745
- Sir, sir. Priyanka is on the line, sir.
- Oh, oh, give me the phone.

16:29.825 --> 16:31.385
Hello, Priyanka?

16:31.465 --> 16:34.065
<i>Uh, hi, sir. How are you doing?</i>

16:34.145 --> 16:36.465
Should I send you some fish?
What would you like to have today?

16:36.545 --> 16:38.345
Who the hell have you called?

16:38.425 --> 16:41.545
That's my aunt's daughter Priyanka.
She sells fish.

16:41.625 --> 16:44.145
I told you to call our Priyanka, didn't I?

16:44.225 --> 16:45.585
I don't have her number.

16:45.665 --> 16:47.305
- I only have this Priyanka's number.
- Shut up!

16:47.385 --> 16:49.825
Sir, sir. Are you in the mood
for some golden anchovies?

16:49.905 --> 16:52.105
No, no, no, no, no.
We'll-- I'll talk about fish later.

16:52.185 --> 16:55.225
You jump in a ditch! You fool! You idiot!

16:55.305 --> 16:57.545
You told me to call Priyanka.
So I called Priyanka.

16:57.625 --> 16:59.985
- Take this and shut up!
- See now I'm hungry again.

17:00.065 --> 17:01.825
Yeah, so go, eat and go die.

17:01.905 --> 17:03.305
Eat and die, only that much.

17:03.385 --> 17:04.665
If you don't know
the language, why speak it?

17:04.745 --> 17:06.225
All right, now buzz off!

17:06.305 --> 17:09.465
Here, here, here, she's calling.
Priya is calling.

17:10.665 --> 17:13.905
- Yeah, Priyanka?
- Uncle. The plan is on. Okay?

17:13.985 --> 17:18.305
We can't back out now. We can't back out.
I've just-- I've just gotten rid of Adi.

17:18.385 --> 17:22.425
What? My dear?
You have two innocent little children.

17:23.505 --> 17:26.065
For that slime Micky,
you got rid of your--

17:26.145 --> 17:27.665
He was such a good man.

17:27.745 --> 17:29.945
No, no, no!
I didn't get rid of him forever.

17:30.025 --> 17:31.385
He's still very much alive.

17:31.465 --> 17:32.625
Oh! Oh, okay, okay.

17:32.705 --> 17:34.625
- Just for today, I got rid of him.
- Hmm!

17:34.705 --> 17:37.545
- All right, very good, very good.
- Uncle, we're running out of time. Okay?

17:37.625 --> 17:40.705
I have to leave now.
I'll explain everything to you later.

17:40.785 --> 17:42.825
- Hmm!
- I'm so sorry.

17:42.905 --> 17:44.785
I'll make up for it tonight. Okay?

17:44.865 --> 17:46.065
Bye, bye.

17:46.145 --> 17:49.145
At least say bye to me, Adi.
Say it, tell me, tell me.

17:49.225 --> 17:52.705
Vishnusharman! Come here. Come here.
Come, get the small car out.

17:52.785 --> 17:54.665
And do what with it?

17:54.745 --> 17:57.665
Hey, take it out to drive the damn thing.

17:57.745 --> 17:59.105
So confused.
There's no clarity whatsoever.

17:59.185 --> 18:01.385
Come, come, come, come, come!

18:01.465 --> 18:03.545
Why is this Priyanka not here yet?

18:03.625 --> 18:04.465
- I'm calling.
- Yeah.

18:04.545 --> 18:05.385
- Hutoxi.
- Yeah?

18:05.465 --> 18:08.545
You had informed Twinkle,
I hope, that she needs to tell Micky

18:08.625 --> 18:10.305
that she is going to Colaba for shopping.

18:10.385 --> 18:12.825
But she'll actually wait
in the café across the street.

18:12.905 --> 18:15.025
I've told her.
She knows what to do. Don't worry.

18:15.105 --> 18:16.945
Are you done?

18:17.025 --> 18:19.505
You guys really talk so much.

18:19.585 --> 18:22.065
You know my performance
is about to begin at Micky's place.

18:22.945 --> 18:25.465
- Sorry, sorry.
- Now let me rehearse my part.

18:25.545 --> 18:26.585
Yeah, yeah, sorry.

18:26.665 --> 18:28.025
Will she be able to do it?

18:28.105 --> 18:29.465
Yeah!

18:29.545 --> 18:32.585
Micky will see her
and do everything on his own.

19:13.025 --> 19:16.265
Come, come, please come in.
By the way, I'm Dr. Mikhael Oberoi.

19:17.425 --> 19:20.225
- Who doesn't know you, Doctor?
- Huh?

19:20.305 --> 19:21.705
Actually…

19:21.785 --> 19:25.625
A few years ago,
you performed an open heart surgery

19:25.705 --> 19:27.625
on my brother and saved his life.

19:28.745 --> 19:30.025
So…

19:31.305 --> 19:33.545
So what? It was my duty.

19:35.025 --> 19:36.865
- Cardiac surgeon, you know.
- Hmm.

19:36.945 --> 19:38.985
Uh, uh, uh, w-what can I get you?

19:39.065 --> 19:41.585
Something cold? Hot?

19:42.625 --> 19:46.585
Or I can, uh, I also have Pink Moscato.

19:46.665 --> 19:49.425
Yeah, I'll have that.

19:50.385 --> 19:51.665
- Yeah?
- Hmm.

19:52.545 --> 19:54.665
You make yourself comfortable, Miss, uh…

19:54.745 --> 19:55.985
Alicia Sarsotela.

19:56.065 --> 19:58.625
I love Italian Mozzarella.

19:58.705 --> 20:01.105
Then I'll make it Alicia Sarsorella.

20:01.185 --> 20:03.345
How accommodating!

20:04.585 --> 20:08.305
And, uh, by the way,
I'm, uh, Miss Blue Goat Punjab.

20:09.385 --> 20:12.585
And Matsyagandha fine cut betel
beauty queen.

20:12.665 --> 20:16.025
Sounds elegant. I'll get the Pink Moscato.

20:25.305 --> 20:26.545
- It's here.
- Message. It's come?

20:26.625 --> 20:29.105
- Alicia just messaged!
- Oh, my God! Okay. Hutoxi!

20:29.185 --> 20:31.705
Immediately call Twinkle and ask her
to come home in five minutes.

20:31.785 --> 20:33.185
- The trap is set.
- Trap is set.

20:33.265 --> 20:34.145
The trap is set.

20:36.665 --> 20:37.785
Oh!

20:38.825 --> 20:39.745
Hi, Hutoxi!

20:39.825 --> 20:42.265
Twinkle, listen.
Just leave the café across the street

20:42.345 --> 20:44.345
and reach home in two minutes, okay?
The trap is set.

20:44.425 --> 20:46.465
- Yes!
- What, in two minutes?

20:46.545 --> 20:49.185
But I already crossed Bandra a while ago.

20:49.265 --> 20:51.385
It will take me at least
an hour and a half to get back home.

20:51.465 --> 20:52.945
What?

20:53.025 --> 20:56.385
Yeah, I told you I'm going to Colaba
for a jewelry exhibition.

20:56.465 --> 20:58.145
To buy
my favorite movie star's handkerchief.

20:58.225 --> 21:01.265
It's a free gift
with the one crore rupee earrings.

21:01.345 --> 21:03.345
Twinkle, I told you to just tell Micky

21:03.425 --> 21:05.385
that you are going to Colaba
for shopping or something,

21:05.465 --> 21:08.185
but then actually go and sit in the café
across the street.

21:08.265 --> 21:11.825
No, no, no, no.
Hutoxi, if I was actually in the café,

21:11.905 --> 21:14.665
I would have really reached back home
in two minutes, right?

21:14.745 --> 21:16.385
Then Micky would be suspicious,

21:16.465 --> 21:19.625
how did Twinkle cover such a long distance
in such a short time?

21:19.705 --> 21:22.345
Do you guys ever even think
about things logically or not?

21:23.505 --> 21:25.465
Dude, she has actually gone
to Colaba for shopping.

21:25.545 --> 21:26.785
What?

21:26.865 --> 21:28.145
Oh, my God! This girl!

21:28.225 --> 21:29.985
Okay, listen, listen.
Let's go, let's go. Come on.

21:30.065 --> 21:31.945
- Where?
- Just come. I'll tell you.

21:32.025 --> 21:33.545
All right, listen to me. Listen…

21:33.625 --> 21:34.785
Listen, wait, wait, wait.

21:34.865 --> 21:36.785
Listen, listen, listen to me.

21:36.865 --> 21:38.745
- You guys go…
- Yeah.

21:38.825 --> 21:41.945
…and I want you to click a picture
of Micky and Alicia

21:42.025 --> 21:44.585
exactly at the moment when the two of them
are kissing each other.

21:44.665 --> 21:47.545
You get it now.
We need some kind of proof, right?

21:47.625 --> 21:49.665
We need Twinkle to see some actual proof.

21:49.745 --> 21:51.825
Okay, okay, let us go!
Come on, girls. Let's go.

21:51.905 --> 21:53.665
- Go, go, go.
- Bye. Bye.

21:55.465 --> 21:56.505
Where did Kuku go?

22:00.825 --> 22:02.265
Pink Moscato.

22:44.385 --> 22:45.345
- Come on.
- Adi?

22:48.705 --> 22:49.545
What's happened to her?

22:49.625 --> 22:51.545
- She's started dancing.
- What's happening to her?

22:51.625 --> 22:52.505
No, Uncle Kuku, she's not dancing.

22:52.585 --> 22:54.345
Micky must have done something.
Micky's done something to her.

22:54.425 --> 22:56.225
No. She's having fits. Look at her.

23:06.345 --> 23:09.985
Alicia.