WEBVTT
00:00:26.438 --> 00:00:28.938 align:center
Watch me runnin' up the place
00:00:29.021 --> 00:00:32.146 align:center
I'm already stuntin'
And my girls are on the way
00:00:32.855 --> 00:00:34.855 align:center
Watch me open up the place…
00:00:34.980 --> 00:00:37.771 align:center
Just imagine. This will change everything.
00:00:37.855 --> 00:00:41.771 align:center
The lights come up, and we walk out
on stage like two sexy gladiators.
00:00:41.855 --> 00:00:45.230 align:center
Our technique, flawless.
Our timing, perfect.
00:00:45.313 --> 00:00:47.688 align:center
Phones are out. Minds are blown.
00:00:47.771 --> 00:00:51.063 align:center
And guess who blacks out from jealousy
because we just took home first place.
00:00:51.146 --> 00:00:52.188 align:center
Tanya?
00:00:52.271 --> 00:00:54.855 align:center
Tanya. Future nursing school
dropout Tanya.
00:00:57.105 --> 00:00:59.271 align:center
So, you ready to do this?
00:00:59.355 --> 00:01:01.230 align:center
- Nope. I'm out. I bail so hard.
- Whoa!
00:01:01.313 --> 00:01:04.605 align:center
Anj, hi, hey. Everything's in place.
The plan is perfect.
00:01:04.688 --> 00:01:06.063 align:center
The plan is insane.
00:01:06.146 --> 00:01:07.313 align:center
Maya, just let it go.
00:01:07.396 --> 00:01:10.021 align:center
After graduation,
we're never gonna see Tanya again.
00:01:10.105 --> 00:01:12.063 align:center
Jump…
00:01:12.146 --> 00:01:14.438 align:center
Yeah, but she's never
respected us as dancers.
00:01:14.521 --> 00:01:15.563 align:center
I know, I know.
00:01:15.646 --> 00:01:18.563 align:center
If we're going to win,
we have to do something unexpected.
00:01:18.646 --> 00:01:19.896 align:center
Please.
00:01:21.646 --> 00:01:23.355 align:center
You're my best friend.
00:01:23.438 --> 00:01:24.938 align:center
I can't do this without you.
00:01:25.021 --> 00:01:26.730 align:center
Watch me runnin' up the place…
00:01:26.813 --> 00:01:28.105 align:center
Fine.
00:01:28.688 --> 00:01:30.313 align:center
- I'm in.
- Yeah!
00:01:30.813 --> 00:01:33.855 align:center
Watch me open up the place
00:01:33.938 --> 00:01:37.855 align:center
Wanna see you bumpin', baby
Bouncin' to the bass
00:01:40.730 --> 00:01:41.646 align:center
Good luck.
00:01:43.980 --> 00:01:45.730 align:center
- What a bitch.
- Her legs are so smooth.
00:01:45.813 --> 00:01:48.855 align:center
- How does she never get razor burn?
- Hey, hey, Anj. Look at me. Lock in.
00:01:48.938 --> 00:01:50.480 align:center
Remember.
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- Whew.
- Whew. Okay.
00:01:52.896 --> 00:01:54.521 align:center
You win the crowd,
00:01:54.605 --> 00:01:55.938 align:center
you win your freedom.
00:01:56.855 --> 00:01:57.896 align:center
What?
00:01:57.980 --> 00:02:01.730 align:center
And good luck, Tanya, next year
at the Touro School of Nursing.
00:02:01.813 --> 00:02:05.105 align:center
Now, seniors Maya and Anjali
with a cultural dance
00:02:05.188 --> 00:02:07.771 align:center
from the country of India.
00:02:56.313 --> 00:02:58.230 align:center
They're actually pretty good.
00:02:58.313 --> 00:02:59.146 align:center
No.
00:03:02.855 --> 00:03:04.396 align:center
You ain't seen nothing yet.
00:03:39.730 --> 00:03:41.980 align:center
I can't. Let's go.
00:03:54.896 --> 00:03:57.605 align:center
- What's happening?
- Maybe something with the sensors?
00:03:57.688 --> 00:03:59.646 align:center
- Look out!
- Maya, watch out!
00:03:59.730 --> 00:04:00.646 align:center
Shit!
00:04:01.146 --> 00:04:03.105 align:center
Don't worry. Anj! It's all good.
Everything's--
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Maya!
00:04:08.355 --> 00:04:09.563 align:center
Is she okay?
00:04:11.021 --> 00:04:11.980 align:center
Maya!
00:04:12.063 --> 00:04:13.271 align:center
Maya!
00:04:13.355 --> 00:04:14.980 align:center
Maya! Maya!
00:04:42.146 --> 00:04:43.896 align:center
- Topic of the day.
- Patil twins.
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- Harry Potter, Yule Ball.
- Messed up.
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Ugly outfits, objectively bad.
00:04:47.938 --> 00:04:49.313 align:center
And then the boys ditch them.
00:04:49.938 --> 00:04:51.021 align:center
What's up with that?
00:04:57.730 --> 00:04:59.521 align:center
- My aura?
- Yeah. Ready?
00:05:09.396 --> 00:05:10.730 align:center
Then take this.
00:05:14.230 --> 00:05:15.938 align:center
- Oh, photo.
- Oh, photo, okay.
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You look so good.
00:05:17.188 --> 00:05:18.855 align:center
- Look over here!
- Smile, girls!
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One, two, three.
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UCLA!
00:05:27.980 --> 00:05:30.480 align:center
Ah, rumors are true. Lot of Asians.
00:05:30.563 --> 00:05:35.313 align:center
Whee! We're, like, at college!
Like, right now! Can you believe it?
00:05:35.396 --> 00:05:37.688 align:center
- Mm-hmm.
- Maybe I should try out a new nickname.
00:05:37.771 --> 00:05:40.271 align:center
How about Anja? Jaja?
00:05:40.355 --> 00:05:41.938 align:center
No. Jelly? Jelly Cat?
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- We could think about it.
- I love him.
00:05:45.355 --> 00:05:47.438 align:center
Oh my God. I can be whoever I wanna be.
00:05:48.021 --> 00:05:51.271 align:center
The name's Leelee, babes.
I think we'll have really good banter.
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I'm good.
00:05:54.271 --> 00:05:57.146 align:center
You realize we can go out,
like, whenever we want.
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- And come home whenever we want.
- Mmm.
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- So late I forget to take out my contacts.
- Dude. Don't do that.
00:06:02.688 --> 00:06:05.271 align:center
That's gonna hurt so bad.
But it'd be so worth it.
00:06:05.355 --> 00:06:08.230 align:center
Please don't be that weird sheltered girl
who has to get her stomach pumped
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because she can't handle freedom.
00:06:09.730 --> 00:06:11.771 align:center
- That's exactly who I wanna be.
- Heads up!
00:06:11.855 --> 00:06:13.355 align:center
- Oh shit!
- Got it!
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Ugh!
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- Hey.
- Yo.
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- My bad.
- Hey.
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That was a terrible throw.
00:06:20.896 --> 00:06:22.813 align:center
Yeah, some would say deliberately bad.
00:06:25.521 --> 00:06:29.271 align:center
Okay, well, this is embarrassing.
Um, we're gonna go.
00:06:29.355 --> 00:06:31.813 align:center
You know what? No Frisbee.
You've both been banned.
00:06:31.896 --> 00:06:34.313 align:center
Well, call us when the ban's been lifted.
00:06:37.563 --> 00:06:40.688 align:center
I know guys throw themselves at you
like you're the last flight out of Kabul,
00:06:40.771 --> 00:06:42.980 align:center
but this has got to be a new record, hmm?
00:06:43.730 --> 00:06:46.146 align:center
- Stop moving!
- They wanna keep stonewalling, fine.
00:06:46.230 --> 00:06:48.521 align:center
- We'll just move…
- See, if you had just worn something nice.
00:06:48.605 --> 00:06:49.813 align:center
The way Anjali always does…
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I don't look nice. I look like
a seat filler at the Latin GRAMMYs.
00:06:53.105 --> 00:06:55.313 align:center
- Zero patience…
- A little black dress works.
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- Career fairs, parties, SASA mixers…
- Call me when you know.
00:06:58.480 --> 00:07:00.396 align:center
Oh my God. Stop with the SASA mixer.
00:07:00.480 --> 00:07:02.855 align:center
- What's a SASA mixer?
- Seriously, Shree? SASA?
00:07:02.938 --> 00:07:06.188 align:center
See? Even Rekha Auntie agrees with me.
She thinks SASA's cringe.
00:07:06.271 --> 00:07:07.688 align:center
- What's this?
- Bathroom stuff.
00:07:07.771 --> 00:07:10.021 align:center
There's nothing cringe
about celebrating your culture.
00:07:10.105 --> 00:07:11.605 align:center
Okay, what is a SASA?
00:07:11.688 --> 00:07:13.480 align:center
South Asian Students Association.
00:07:13.563 --> 00:07:15.480 align:center
And they don't celebrate our culture.
00:07:15.563 --> 00:07:18.980 align:center
It's a bunch of cornballs trying to pad
their résumés to get into med school.
00:07:19.063 --> 00:07:20.313 align:center
Sounds pretty Indian to me.
00:07:20.396 --> 00:07:24.021 align:center
I already told Arjun Singh you will both
meet him tonight at the SASA mixer.
00:07:24.105 --> 00:07:25.980 align:center
Arjun who? Arjun the incel?
00:07:26.063 --> 00:07:29.438 align:center
He's not an incel! He's a sophomore,
and he'd love to show you around.
00:07:29.521 --> 00:07:31.730 align:center
Show me around what?
His collection of feet pics?
00:07:31.813 --> 00:07:34.480 align:center
Shree, why are we introducing weird boys
to the equation?
00:07:34.563 --> 00:07:36.230 align:center
- What's this?
- Bathroom stuff!
00:07:36.313 --> 00:07:39.771 align:center
A bad freshman GPA
is impossible to bounce back from,
00:07:39.855 --> 00:07:41.688 align:center
especially if you're a bad test taker.
00:07:41.771 --> 00:07:43.730 align:center
My GPA will survive one mixer.
00:07:43.813 --> 00:07:46.980 align:center
- Anjali, it's a miracle you got in.
- But I did, didn't I?
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Off the waitlist.
You need to stay focused.
00:07:49.230 --> 00:07:51.146 align:center
- Ahem.
- Bathroom stuff!
00:07:51.230 --> 00:07:53.063 align:center
Uh, how much bathroom stuff is there?
00:07:53.146 --> 00:07:54.480 align:center
A normal amount!
00:07:55.355 --> 00:07:57.105 align:center
- Cool. Cool.
- Okay.
00:07:59.771 --> 00:08:02.271 align:center
- The IG is way too curated.
- I know.
00:08:02.355 --> 00:08:03.605 align:center
- So fun.
- Cool.
00:08:03.688 --> 00:08:05.605 align:center
Nah, bro. She's like a Santa Monica eight.
00:08:05.688 --> 00:08:08.730 align:center
- Which is like a Malibu five.
- Oh my God. Hi!
00:08:21.230 --> 00:08:23.813 align:center
It's a pony, not just a bend. Uh…
00:08:24.855 --> 00:08:27.271 align:center
The hook step,
you guys shouldn't lock your arms.
00:08:27.355 --> 00:08:29.313 align:center
Instead, you should pivot from the elbow.
00:08:29.396 --> 00:08:30.855 align:center
Sorry, who are you?
00:08:30.938 --> 00:08:33.480 align:center
I'm sorry. You guys are great.
It's just I used to dance…
00:08:33.563 --> 00:08:35.563 align:center
Oh my God! I know you.
00:08:35.646 --> 00:08:37.980 align:center
- You're the girl from that video.
- Wait, what video?
00:08:38.063 --> 00:08:40.105 align:center
Who hit herself in the face
with the flying thingy!
00:08:40.188 --> 00:08:41.938 align:center
- That's not me.
- You have to see!
00:08:42.021 --> 00:08:43.480 align:center
- Are you kidding me?
- Sorry.
00:08:43.563 --> 00:08:44.855 align:center
I just gotta go.
00:08:44.938 --> 00:08:47.188 align:center
- Look out.
- All right, you know what--
00:08:47.271 --> 00:08:50.105 align:center
Oh my God, you're Drone Strike Girl!
00:08:50.188 --> 00:08:52.521 align:center
Wait, you're, like, famous!
00:08:52.605 --> 00:08:54.313 align:center
But, like, bad famous.
00:08:54.396 --> 00:08:56.313 align:center
You mean infamous?
00:08:57.813 --> 00:09:01.271 align:center
- Can I have that purple top of yours?
- Yeah, sure.
00:09:02.896 --> 00:09:05.563 align:center
I can make more room in that closet.
00:09:05.646 --> 00:09:06.938 align:center
Wait, Mom! Don't!
00:09:07.438 --> 00:09:08.313 align:center
Oh!
00:09:10.521 --> 00:09:12.438 align:center
Ooh.
00:09:12.521 --> 00:09:14.855 align:center
Yeah. There's more bathroom stuff
in the car.
00:09:14.938 --> 00:09:16.313 align:center
I'm coming too.
00:09:20.521 --> 00:09:21.605 align:center
It was just for…
00:09:22.855 --> 00:09:24.105 align:center
- To…
- For what?
00:09:24.188 --> 00:09:26.896 align:center
For getting high.
For having a couple of one-night stands.
00:09:26.980 --> 00:09:29.480 align:center
Can you please stop acting like
I started an OnlyFans?
00:09:29.563 --> 00:09:32.355 align:center
Do you realize
if UCLA still had an SAT score,
00:09:32.438 --> 00:09:34.771 align:center
there is no way you would have gotten in?
00:09:34.855 --> 00:09:37.105 align:center
Let alone for a major
that is only getting harder.
00:09:37.188 --> 00:09:39.896 align:center
- A major you picked for me!
- 'Cause you couldn't decide.
00:09:39.980 --> 00:09:43.355 align:center
Computer science is gonna give you
a shot at real money.
00:09:43.438 --> 00:09:45.813 align:center
While we're at it,
you wanna walk me to the bus stop?
00:09:45.896 --> 00:09:48.480 align:center
- Pack me a Lunchable?
- I'm not gonna babysit you.
00:09:49.396 --> 00:09:52.146 align:center
But I will stop paying your tuition
if I find out you're slacking off.
00:09:52.230 --> 00:09:54.438 align:center
Wait. What?
00:09:55.771 --> 00:09:57.021 align:center
Mom, are you serious?
00:09:57.105 --> 00:09:58.730 align:center
I know you think I'm being a bitch.
00:09:58.813 --> 00:10:01.105 align:center
But you'll thank me
when you have a degree and a career
00:10:01.188 --> 00:10:03.188 align:center
and you don't have to depend
on anyone for anything.
00:10:03.271 --> 00:10:04.688 align:center
And how's that working out for you?
00:10:06.813 --> 00:10:10.105 align:center
If you got a full ride like Maya,
you could do anything you want,
00:10:10.188 --> 00:10:11.980 align:center
but as long as I am footing this bill,
00:10:12.063 --> 00:10:15.146 align:center
you don't get to be some aimless pothead
00:10:15.230 --> 00:10:20.480 align:center
having shower sex in an en suite
that I am paying an extra ten grand for.
00:10:21.063 --> 00:10:22.438 align:center
And you wonder why Dad left.
00:10:22.521 --> 00:10:24.605 align:center
Ooh!
00:10:30.188 --> 00:10:31.980 align:center
Damn, that echoed.
00:10:37.230 --> 00:10:40.105 align:center
They ran out of ice,
but I got the next best thing.
00:10:40.188 --> 00:10:41.438 align:center
Someone's favorite.
00:10:42.605 --> 00:10:43.813 align:center
How are you feelin'?
00:10:43.896 --> 00:10:48.105 align:center
I got slapped on my first day of college.
00:10:48.188 --> 00:10:50.355 align:center
Let's go with, pfft…
00:10:50.438 --> 00:10:51.521 align:center
suicidal?
00:10:51.605 --> 00:10:52.855 align:center
Aah.
00:10:52.938 --> 00:10:54.896 align:center
The slap wasn't even that bad.
00:10:54.980 --> 00:10:56.855 align:center
None of the Asian kids even flinched.
00:10:56.938 --> 00:10:59.146 align:center
The white kids almost called the cops.
00:10:59.230 --> 00:11:04.021 align:center
Yeah, well, at least you didn't get hit
with the Green Card mom slap. Right?
00:11:04.105 --> 00:11:06.313 align:center
Remember when Charu
got her belly button pierced?
00:11:06.396 --> 00:11:08.646 align:center
I mean, she got hit so hard,
the sound turned on the Alexa.
00:11:08.730 --> 00:11:09.855 align:center
Hmm.
00:11:11.938 --> 00:11:13.146 align:center
Does it still hurt?
00:11:13.230 --> 00:11:15.438 align:center
No, it's honestly fine.
00:11:15.521 --> 00:11:16.896 align:center
Good.
00:11:16.980 --> 00:11:18.355 align:center
I want you nice and healed.
00:11:18.896 --> 00:11:21.521 align:center
- Before I slap the shit out of you again!
- Oww!
00:11:21.605 --> 00:11:24.230 align:center
- Maya, what?
- Not gonna tell me you're on the pill?
00:11:26.896 --> 00:11:29.563 align:center
You were gonna what? Disconnect
our Bluetooth without telling me?
00:11:29.646 --> 00:11:30.938 align:center
I'm not on the pill!
00:11:31.021 --> 00:11:34.146 align:center
Then… why have you got all these… pills?
00:11:34.230 --> 00:11:36.438 align:center
I don't know! I just… It… Ugh.
00:11:36.521 --> 00:11:39.313 align:center
it was just… eleutheromania!
00:11:39.980 --> 00:11:42.980 align:center
It's, like, doing something
just for the sake of freedom.
00:11:43.563 --> 00:11:47.521 align:center
I just needed to figure out if I could be
someone different for once in my life.
00:11:47.605 --> 00:11:49.730 align:center
I'm not sure if that makes any sense.
00:11:51.896 --> 00:11:54.313 align:center
Two girls down the hall
called me Drone Strike.
00:11:55.646 --> 00:11:56.730 align:center
Ugh.
00:11:57.688 --> 00:12:00.396 align:center
Maya, I'm so sorry.
00:12:01.646 --> 00:12:03.896 align:center
They would have clowned me, too,
if I'd been there.
00:12:05.230 --> 00:12:06.105 align:center
Anj.
00:12:07.396 --> 00:12:10.771 align:center
The most upvoted comment
is a guy asking for your number.
00:12:11.355 --> 00:12:15.063 align:center
The second most upvoted is a guy
asking the first guy to pass it along.
00:12:21.563 --> 00:12:23.771 align:center
- This is Half Baked.
- Hmm?
00:12:23.855 --> 00:12:25.855 align:center
- My favorite's Cherry Garcia.
- Yeah.
00:12:26.438 --> 00:12:29.730 align:center
I said I got someone's favorite.
And that someone is me!
00:12:31.438 --> 00:12:32.271 align:center
All right.
00:12:32.771 --> 00:12:34.146 align:center
Today sucked a butt.
00:12:34.230 --> 00:12:36.938 align:center
- So I say we go to Taco Bell.
- Mmm.
00:12:37.021 --> 00:12:38.271 align:center
And we watch 90 Day Fiancé.
00:12:38.355 --> 00:12:42.438 align:center
You wanna stay in and watch
ugly men marry Latvian immigrants?
00:12:42.521 --> 00:12:45.021 align:center
And get Taco Bell. That part's key.
00:12:45.105 --> 00:12:46.355 align:center
No!
00:12:47.188 --> 00:12:49.730 align:center
It is our first night of college.
We need to go out.
00:12:51.355 --> 00:12:52.563 align:center
You cannot be serious.
00:12:52.646 --> 00:12:54.521 align:center
Dude, I survived child abuse!
00:13:04.063 --> 00:13:06.271 align:center
Whoa! Look at all these clubs!
00:13:06.771 --> 00:13:09.021 align:center
Sticky Wickets Cricket Club.
00:13:09.771 --> 00:13:11.355 align:center
Hookah Brother Up.
00:13:12.355 --> 00:13:15.021 align:center
I love how all brown dudes smoke hookah
like they're Drake
00:13:15.105 --> 00:13:16.605 align:center
and they just end up at dental school.
00:13:16.688 --> 00:13:19.355 align:center
Come on! Just admit this is way cooler
than you thought it would be.
00:13:19.438 --> 00:13:21.771 align:center
All right, you're right.
It's pretty cool. It's pretty cool.
00:13:21.855 --> 00:13:24.688 align:center
- Oh! A club I could get behind.
- Wait, which one?
00:13:24.771 --> 00:13:27.230 align:center
Freshman 15, baby. I'm starving!
00:13:29.646 --> 00:13:31.771 align:center
Ooh, Maya, look!
There's a Bollywood dance club.
00:13:32.480 --> 00:13:36.438 align:center
I told you. I'm down to try new things.
Just not dance. Not right now.
00:13:36.521 --> 00:13:39.271 align:center
Come on, it's a club.
It'll meet, like, an hour a week.
00:13:42.146 --> 00:13:43.980 align:center
- But don't get your hopes up, okay?
- Hi!
00:13:44.063 --> 00:13:46.563 align:center
90% of Bollywood dance
is just dry-humping the air.
00:13:46.646 --> 00:13:48.896 align:center
Do you really need a club for that?
00:13:49.813 --> 00:13:51.438 align:center
Sorry. Sorry.
00:13:52.313 --> 00:13:54.605 align:center
See? Handyman with no boundaries
agrees with me.
00:13:54.688 --> 00:13:58.105 align:center
Well, I'm gonna check it out
'cause it seems cool,
00:13:58.188 --> 00:14:00.521 align:center
and trying cool shit's
the whole point of college!
00:14:02.605 --> 00:14:05.480 align:center
- You know, she's not wrong.
- All right. You are still talking.
00:14:05.563 --> 00:14:09.271 align:center
Bollywood dance is a very big deal here.
K-Pop level fandom.
00:14:13.605 --> 00:14:15.813 align:center
All right, brown Ted Bundy.
What's your deal?
00:14:15.896 --> 00:14:18.605 align:center
This one's a coincidence. I'm working.
I don't know if you can see?
00:14:18.688 --> 00:14:20.938 align:center
And for the record,
the whole number on the Frisbee thing,
00:14:21.021 --> 00:14:22.688 align:center
that was my buddy's idea, not mine.
00:14:22.771 --> 00:14:25.938 align:center
- Cool story, bro.
- Don't believe me? Call the number, Maya.
00:14:27.021 --> 00:14:30.688 align:center
- Okay. Seriously? How do you know my name?
- I had a feeling you didn't recognize me.
00:14:33.063 --> 00:14:34.688 align:center
It's me. Arjun.
00:14:35.855 --> 00:14:37.230 align:center
"Arjun the incel."
00:14:37.813 --> 00:14:41.896 align:center
- That's what the kids used to call me.
- Kids are so mean. Mm-mm-mm.
00:14:41.980 --> 00:14:43.771 align:center
Also, the name made no sense.
00:14:43.855 --> 00:14:46.063 align:center
We were ten. We were all virgins.
00:14:46.146 --> 00:14:48.063 align:center
It would have been weird
if I wasn't a virgin.
00:14:48.146 --> 00:14:50.146 align:center
- And probably also illegal.
- Definitely illegal.
00:14:51.230 --> 00:14:52.271 align:center
You know, your mom called.
00:14:52.355 --> 00:14:55.188 align:center
- Said you weren't coming.
- Uh… Anjali dragged me.
00:14:55.271 --> 00:14:57.730 align:center
- So…
- Yo! What up, Drone Strike?
00:14:57.813 --> 00:14:59.605 align:center
Pfffft!
00:15:01.396 --> 00:15:02.813 align:center
You're goated!
00:15:03.438 --> 00:15:05.230 align:center
Okay. What was that about?
00:15:05.313 --> 00:15:08.396 align:center
Don't act like you don't know.
It was the biggest meme of the summer.
00:15:08.480 --> 00:15:11.146 align:center
Oh, well, I'm not on socials,
so I must have missed it.
00:15:11.230 --> 00:15:14.605 align:center
- Bullshit.
- No. I'm serious. Here.
00:15:15.230 --> 00:15:18.105 align:center
No Internet, no apps. No more noise.
00:15:18.188 --> 00:15:21.938 align:center
Oh, so you have a burner phone,
like cheaters and meth dealers.
00:15:22.021 --> 00:15:22.855 align:center
That's comforting.
00:15:22.938 --> 00:15:24.646 align:center
Better than letting Big Tech track you.
00:15:24.730 --> 00:15:27.188 align:center
It's not Big Tech that tracks me.
It's my best friend.
00:15:27.271 --> 00:15:29.063 align:center
- Oh, great. Mm-hmm.
- All right? Yeah.
00:15:29.146 --> 00:15:31.938 align:center
In the event that some rando
from my past decides to drown me in a lake
00:15:32.021 --> 00:15:33.730 align:center
and then no one can find my body.
00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:37.313 align:center
- That would never occur to me.
- Yeah, no shit. You're a man.
00:15:37.396 --> 00:15:40.480 align:center
No, I mean I'd dissolve you in acid.
No loose ends.
00:15:43.313 --> 00:15:46.896 align:center
It's like an instant social life,
and the after parties are crazy.
00:15:46.980 --> 00:15:50.605 align:center
Last year, we went to Vegas, and
I totally puked in the Bellagio fountains.
00:15:50.688 --> 00:15:52.313 align:center
Stop. That sounds so fun.
00:15:52.396 --> 00:15:54.146 align:center
Minus the puking part.
00:15:54.230 --> 00:15:55.521 align:center
When's the next meet-up?
00:15:55.605 --> 00:15:58.355 align:center
- You can't just come. You gotta audition.
- Sorry, wait. Audition?
00:15:58.438 --> 00:16:00.605 align:center
We're a competitive dance team.
00:16:00.688 --> 00:16:03.105 align:center
We compete at competitions
all over the country.
00:16:03.188 --> 00:16:05.105 align:center
That sounds like a big time commitment.
00:16:05.188 --> 00:16:08.396 align:center
Oh, it takes up your entire life.
No. We're like a cult.
00:16:08.480 --> 00:16:11.271 align:center
Uh, yeah. I really have to focus
first semester…
00:16:11.355 --> 00:16:12.938 align:center
You know what I just realized?
00:16:13.771 --> 00:16:15.438 align:center
Ronak is gonna love her.
00:16:15.521 --> 00:16:19.230 align:center
Oh! Love her. She's total lead material.
00:16:19.313 --> 00:16:20.730 align:center
Who's Ronak?
00:16:20.813 --> 00:16:22.938 align:center
You'll see. We're about to go on.
00:16:28.813 --> 00:16:33.771 align:center
Welcome to the South Asian
Students Association Fall Mixer!
00:16:33.855 --> 00:16:35.563 align:center
I'm Ayesha Khan,
00:16:35.646 --> 00:16:37.438 align:center
proud Pakistani American.
00:16:37.521 --> 00:16:42.063 align:center
- President of the South Asian Student--
- Co-president, actually.
00:16:42.146 --> 00:16:43.480 align:center
We split the vote.
00:16:43.563 --> 00:16:45.896 align:center
I'm Preethi Shah, proud Indian American.
00:16:45.980 --> 00:16:51.521 align:center
The South Asian Students Association
puts on events like Diwali night, Holi--
00:16:51.605 --> 00:16:54.230 align:center
And of course Eid one and Eid two.
00:16:54.313 --> 00:16:57.146 align:center
Sometimes Preethi forgets that
the diaspora contains many faiths.
00:16:57.230 --> 00:17:00.396 align:center
How can I forget, Ayesha, when you're
constantly trying to convert me?
00:17:00.480 --> 00:17:02.730 align:center
I'm not trying to convert you,
Islamophobic bitch!
00:17:02.813 --> 00:17:05.146 align:center
Okay, thank you so much.
00:17:05.230 --> 00:17:08.313 align:center
Uh, please give it up
for Preethi and Ayesha.
00:17:08.396 --> 00:17:09.980 align:center
That was something.
00:17:10.480 --> 00:17:12.938 align:center
Thank you, ladies. I am Hamza Latif.
00:17:13.021 --> 00:17:14.396 align:center
I am the faculty sponsor.
00:17:14.480 --> 00:17:16.896 align:center
I'm here to make sure
it's a safe space for all the students.
00:17:16.980 --> 00:17:18.438 align:center
We got three rules.
00:17:18.521 --> 00:17:20.271 align:center
And this is mostly for the guys.
00:17:21.188 --> 00:17:22.021 align:center
Consent.
00:17:24.438 --> 00:17:25.271 align:center
Consent!
00:17:26.230 --> 00:17:27.105 align:center
Number three.
00:17:27.188 --> 00:17:31.730 align:center
Your future employer will see
your Halloween costume.
00:17:31.813 --> 00:17:35.021 align:center
I'm talking to you, Ragav. I don't know
where you got the shoe polish.
00:17:35.105 --> 00:17:36.438 align:center
- My bad.
- Okay.
00:17:36.521 --> 00:17:38.855 align:center
Now for the real reason
why we're all here.
00:17:38.938 --> 00:17:41.938 align:center
They are the three-time winners
of Best of the Best.
00:17:42.021 --> 00:17:45.896 align:center
Give it up for our very own UCLA Agni!
00:17:50.605 --> 00:17:51.896 align:center
Welcome to the party
00:17:52.521 --> 00:17:54.730 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:17:55.230 --> 00:17:57.688 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:17:57.771 --> 00:18:00.355 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:18:00.438 --> 00:18:03.188 align:center
- Waking up, waking up
- Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:18:03.271 --> 00:18:06.021 align:center
Fly with my dogs
Ridin' high when we pull up
00:18:06.105 --> 00:18:07.813 align:center
When we ride, when we pull up
00:18:07.896 --> 00:18:10.813 align:center
We be high when we pull up
00:18:11.396 --> 00:18:13.521 align:center
Top down, no ceilin'
00:18:13.605 --> 00:18:16.063 align:center
Rocks on the watch now, armageddon
00:18:16.146 --> 00:18:18.313 align:center
Roof on fire, fire
00:18:18.396 --> 00:18:19.813 align:center
We ride wild
00:18:19.896 --> 00:18:22.730 align:center
Pull up in a tank, 'bout it, 'bout it
00:18:22.813 --> 00:18:25.980 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:18:35.646 --> 00:18:37.021 align:center
I love you, Ronak!
00:18:37.105 --> 00:18:38.938 align:center
Love you, Ronak!
00:18:43.313 --> 00:18:45.230 align:center
I love you, Ronak!
00:19:26.646 --> 00:19:30.021 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:19:30.730 --> 00:19:33.396 align:center
Hey, hey, welcome to the party
00:19:45.355 --> 00:19:49.896 align:center
You don't have to be
The last one standing
00:19:49.980 --> 00:19:54.021 align:center
Oh, show me you could be
The one, one, one
00:20:11.980 --> 00:20:13.896 align:center
You've got me like crazy
00:20:13.980 --> 00:20:16.813 align:center
- That you call to me
- Bom-diggy-diggy bom bom
00:20:30.188 --> 00:20:33.313 align:center
Oh, baby, give me one more dance
00:20:56.855 --> 00:21:01.438 align:center
UCLA! UCLA! UCLA!
00:21:04.105 --> 00:21:05.021 align:center
Yo.
00:21:05.105 --> 00:21:07.438 align:center
How extra was that dance team?
00:21:07.521 --> 00:21:09.021 align:center
So crazy.
00:21:09.105 --> 00:21:12.396 align:center
They literally said they were a cult.
Oh my God, and their captain?
00:21:12.480 --> 00:21:14.355 align:center
Such a cheeseball.
00:21:14.438 --> 00:21:16.646 align:center
He was unironically wearing a fedora.
00:21:16.730 --> 00:21:19.938 align:center
- Please tell me you're gonna burn it.
- Oh, for sure.
00:21:24.396 --> 00:21:25.855 align:center
Love you, Anj.
00:21:25.938 --> 00:21:27.813 align:center
Aww! Love you too.
00:21:28.396 --> 00:21:29.521 align:center
Night.
00:21:29.605 --> 00:21:30.563 align:center
Night.
00:21:41.646 --> 00:21:45.646 align:center
Welcome to CompSci 31,
Introduction to Computer Science.
00:21:45.730 --> 00:21:47.355 align:center
I am Professor Latif.
00:21:47.438 --> 00:21:50.188 align:center
Just so you guys know,
the course structure…
00:21:50.271 --> 00:21:51.438 align:center
I did something fun.
00:21:53.980 --> 00:21:58.146 align:center
- You signed me up for the dance team?
- I signed us up for… tryouts.
00:21:58.230 --> 00:21:59.271 align:center
I thought you'd be excited.
00:21:59.355 --> 00:22:02.521 align:center
Yeah, I thought it was a club
that met, like, once a week.
00:22:02.605 --> 00:22:03.688 align:center
It's a huge time suck.
00:22:03.771 --> 00:22:06.021 align:center
If my grades slip,
my mom's gonna shoot me in the face.
00:22:06.105 --> 00:22:08.813 align:center
Ladies.
We're literally two minutes into day one.
00:22:08.896 --> 00:22:11.938 align:center
So sorry, sir. Professor… Man?
00:22:12.021 --> 00:22:13.230 align:center
Oh my God.
00:22:13.313 --> 00:22:16.646 align:center
Look. All your mom cares about is that
you get good grades and granny panties.
00:22:16.730 --> 00:22:18.521 align:center
You keep both of those up,
she can't get mad.
00:22:18.605 --> 00:22:19.688 align:center
Yeah, it's a big if.
00:22:19.771 --> 00:22:21.563 align:center
Okay. Okay.
00:22:21.646 --> 00:22:23.271 align:center
Then stop stalking Ronak's Insta.
00:22:24.063 --> 00:22:27.230 align:center
- I was perusing.
- You liked a photo from two years ago.
00:22:27.313 --> 00:22:29.938 align:center
- That is a problem. He posts too much.
- Okay, Maya.
00:22:30.021 --> 00:22:31.896 align:center
I'm not you.
I actually have to try at school.
00:22:31.980 --> 00:22:34.480 align:center
If you try out for the team with me,
I won't let you fail.
00:22:34.563 --> 00:22:37.480 align:center
You know what? Idea.
Let's share what we're talking about.
00:22:37.563 --> 00:22:41.063 align:center
That way, none of us feel left out.
Y'all are vibin', and we'd love to vibe.
00:22:43.563 --> 00:22:45.563 align:center
She won't try out
for the dance team with me.
00:22:45.646 --> 00:22:48.605 align:center
Okay. No, this is a learning lesson, guys.
00:22:48.688 --> 00:22:51.521 align:center
Uh, see, this is what's known
as a dependency error.
00:22:51.605 --> 00:22:55.563 align:center
You have one piece of broken code
that can't function without the other,
00:22:55.646 --> 00:23:01.105 align:center
so it sends out a very annoying,
disruptive error message.
00:23:02.063 --> 00:23:06.188 align:center
Well, dance is the one thing
that we're good at
00:23:06.271 --> 00:23:08.521 align:center
and is our best shot at a new life.
00:23:08.605 --> 00:23:12.855 align:center
- We have new lives. We're at college.
- No, you have a new life.
00:23:12.938 --> 00:23:14.230 align:center
I'm still Drone Strike.
00:23:14.313 --> 00:23:15.521 align:center
I told you that was her.
00:23:16.021 --> 00:23:17.230 align:center
Hey, hey.
00:23:17.730 --> 00:23:19.063 align:center
No side betting.
00:23:19.146 --> 00:23:23.063 align:center
If I can lead the team to a championship,
then everyone will stop giving me shit.
00:23:23.146 --> 00:23:26.521 align:center
And if you do it with me,
you'll also be living a whole new life.
00:23:26.605 --> 00:23:29.313 align:center
And maybe even use
that new stash of condoms.
00:23:29.396 --> 00:23:32.313 align:center
- Maya!
- Okay, pivot. Do it for…
00:23:33.355 --> 00:23:35.313 align:center
uh… urethramania.
00:23:36.355 --> 00:23:37.771 align:center
Veryanamania.
00:23:37.855 --> 00:23:39.271 align:center
Eleutheromania.
00:23:39.355 --> 00:23:41.313 align:center
That's it. That's what I said.
00:23:41.396 --> 00:23:43.438 align:center
Do it for that.
00:23:44.605 --> 00:23:45.646 align:center
Please, Anj.
00:24:03.230 --> 00:24:05.688 align:center
Welcome to tryouts for UCLA Agni.
00:24:06.271 --> 00:24:08.355 align:center
You'll notice we're in a parking garage.
00:24:08.438 --> 00:24:11.771 align:center
That's 'cause dancing on concrete
will rule out the weak.
00:24:11.855 --> 00:24:13.980 align:center
And because the pickleball team
took the gym from us.
00:24:14.063 --> 00:24:15.188 align:center
Pickleball sucks.
00:24:15.271 --> 00:24:17.646 align:center
You all should have learned
eight eight-counts of choreo
00:24:17.730 --> 00:24:19.188 align:center
from the videos we sent.
00:24:19.271 --> 00:24:20.980 align:center
Here's the part we didn't tell you.
00:24:21.063 --> 00:24:23.188 align:center
You're gonna perform this routine
ten times.
00:24:23.271 --> 00:24:26.271 align:center
- Each time, the music is gonna get faster.
- Ten times? Dang.
00:24:26.355 --> 00:24:29.771 align:center
And you gotta keep up. If you don't,
you're gonna get hit with this.
00:24:30.396 --> 00:24:32.313 align:center
- Six of us have laser pointers.
- Really?
00:24:32.396 --> 00:24:34.480 align:center
If you get three lasers, you're cut.
00:24:34.563 --> 00:24:37.313 align:center
Whoever's left makes the team. Line up!
00:24:37.938 --> 00:24:38.896 align:center
Easy.
00:24:40.438 --> 00:24:44.480 align:center
Hey, I wanted to give this back to you.
00:24:44.980 --> 00:24:47.230 align:center
So you can give it back to Bruno Mars.
00:24:47.313 --> 00:24:49.605 align:center
Oh, actually, he gave it to me as a gift
00:24:49.688 --> 00:24:51.730 align:center
'cause, you know,
he was gonna call it "Midtown Funk,"
00:24:51.813 --> 00:24:53.105 align:center
and I was like, "No, no."
00:24:54.188 --> 00:24:56.313 align:center
"Uptown Funk."
00:24:56.396 --> 00:24:57.396 align:center
Good luck.
00:25:00.271 --> 00:25:01.271 align:center
Hey, stop!
00:25:58.605 --> 00:25:59.771 align:center
Damn!
00:26:25.480 --> 00:26:26.563 align:center
Oh my God!
00:26:26.646 --> 00:26:29.605 align:center
Congratulations! You all made the cut.
00:26:29.688 --> 00:26:31.146 align:center
Yes!
00:26:34.021 --> 00:26:35.313 align:center
Thank you, my king!
00:26:35.396 --> 00:26:37.396 align:center
All right. You're the king.
Easy. All right.
00:26:45.771 --> 00:26:48.480 align:center
Whoa. Are all these people on the team?
00:26:48.563 --> 00:26:50.355 align:center
Yeah. Kind of looks like a flash mob.
00:26:50.855 --> 00:26:51.980 align:center
It's for formations.
00:26:52.063 --> 00:26:54.438 align:center
You need lots of dancers
to make complex formations.
00:26:55.938 --> 00:27:00.230 align:center
You guys new? Okay, okay!
Yeah! I'm Nirbhay.
00:27:00.313 --> 00:27:03.146 align:center
Not to brag, but this was
my fourth time auditioning for the team,
00:27:03.230 --> 00:27:04.063 align:center
and I made it.
00:27:04.146 --> 00:27:05.230 align:center
Is that a brag?
00:27:05.313 --> 00:27:09.563 align:center
I didn't make the cut last year,
but I lured Ronak into a storage closet,
00:27:09.646 --> 00:27:12.021 align:center
locked the door, and then made him
watch me dance again.
00:27:12.105 --> 00:27:14.855 align:center
- And he ate that shit up.
- Wow, that's dedication.
00:27:14.938 --> 00:27:15.980 align:center
Or it's a felony.
00:27:16.063 --> 00:27:19.271 align:center
Look, every Bollywood team
has a few staple characters, okay?
00:27:19.355 --> 00:27:22.146 align:center
I'm the die-hard superfan with no chill,
and I'm owning that.
00:27:22.230 --> 00:27:25.188 align:center
Over there, you got the FOBs,
Fresh Off the Boat students.
00:27:25.271 --> 00:27:28.021 align:center
They're rich.
Like, make a hit-and-run disappear rich.
00:27:28.105 --> 00:27:29.855 align:center
Then you got your Brown Baddies.
00:27:29.938 --> 00:27:32.230 align:center
Their entire personality
is giving people side-eye.
00:27:32.313 --> 00:27:33.855 align:center
Next, the Adrenaline Junkies.
00:27:33.938 --> 00:27:37.188 align:center
They're like Adderall.
Concerning, but clutch in competition.
00:27:37.271 --> 00:27:39.855 align:center
Last but not least, every Bollywood
team has one random white person
00:27:39.938 --> 00:27:42.105 align:center
who knows more about Indian culture
than everyone else.
00:27:42.188 --> 00:27:43.480 align:center
How's it going?
00:27:44.271 --> 00:27:47.355 align:center
I'm Harry.
So, what part of India are you all from?
00:27:47.938 --> 00:27:50.021 align:center
I'm Tamil. My family is from Sri Lanka.
00:27:50.105 --> 00:27:51.480 align:center
Greetings, little sister!
00:27:51.563 --> 00:27:53.396 align:center
No. Don't… don't do that.
00:27:55.521 --> 00:27:58.021 align:center
There are over 100 dance teams
in the country,
00:27:58.105 --> 00:28:01.688 align:center
but only the top ten make it
to Best of the Best.
00:28:01.771 --> 00:28:03.855 align:center
We cannot allow a repeat of last year.
00:28:04.771 --> 00:28:08.355 align:center
And the winner of Best of the Best is…
00:28:08.438 --> 00:28:12.980 align:center
USC Tamasha!
00:28:13.063 --> 00:28:16.021 align:center
This video will play on loop
at every practice.
00:28:16.105 --> 00:28:18.230 align:center
I want you to live in that pain.
00:28:18.313 --> 00:28:20.355 align:center
Like when we applied to Stanford
and didn't get in.
00:28:20.438 --> 00:28:23.313 align:center
- Mm-hmm.
- USC's number one for a reason.
00:28:23.396 --> 00:28:25.938 align:center
- Why is he so obsessed with beating USC?
- …she goes, we go…
00:28:26.021 --> 00:28:27.730 align:center
He's obsessed with beating her.
00:28:27.813 --> 00:28:30.605 align:center
Selena Joshi, captain of USC
and Ronak's ex.
00:28:30.688 --> 00:28:34.313 align:center
Our next competition is in eight weeks.
Let's get to work.
00:28:35.813 --> 00:28:38.730 align:center
The first thing to know
about competition dance
00:28:38.813 --> 00:28:40.646 align:center
is that it is not objective.
00:28:40.730 --> 00:28:42.771 align:center
The only performance that matters
00:28:42.855 --> 00:28:45.188 align:center
is the one that people remember.
00:28:45.855 --> 00:28:48.105 align:center
Which is why our goal is simple.
00:28:48.188 --> 00:28:50.730 align:center
Be unforgettable! That's it.
00:28:52.271 --> 00:28:54.021 align:center
Thirty-one more! Let's go!
00:28:56.063 --> 00:28:58.021 align:center
We are not here to have fun.
00:28:58.105 --> 00:29:00.021 align:center
We are here to win.
00:29:00.105 --> 00:29:02.896 align:center
If you wanna have a good time
with a bunch of losers,
00:29:02.980 --> 00:29:04.563 align:center
join an a cappella team.
00:29:05.313 --> 00:29:07.230 align:center
No more junk food.
00:29:07.313 --> 00:29:09.813 align:center
Cheetos came out in 1948.
00:29:10.313 --> 00:29:12.771 align:center
Since then, we've never won a war.
00:29:13.271 --> 00:29:15.355 align:center
Here's the truth. AI is here.
00:29:15.438 --> 00:29:17.896 align:center
Your degree is worthless,
and you'll never own a home.
00:29:17.980 --> 00:29:20.063 align:center
Back to practice!
00:29:20.938 --> 00:29:23.730 align:center
Facial expressions are critical!
00:29:23.813 --> 00:29:25.813 align:center
Tell the story with your face.
00:29:25.896 --> 00:29:27.771 align:center
Harry, you're goin' to war!
00:29:28.271 --> 00:29:30.313 align:center
Dimple, he cheated on you.
00:29:30.938 --> 00:29:32.896 align:center
Anjali, they freed Luigi.
00:29:33.396 --> 00:29:35.813 align:center
Deepica, your boyfriend is 5'4".
00:29:35.896 --> 00:29:38.146 align:center
Maya, you're broke, but you want guac.
00:29:38.230 --> 00:29:40.438 align:center
Vishal, Pakistan beat India in cricket.
00:29:40.521 --> 00:29:42.438 align:center
Sumi, the edible is hitting.
00:29:42.521 --> 00:29:44.771 align:center
Nirbhay, you're losing your virginity!
00:29:55.813 --> 00:29:57.230 align:center
What's our goal?
00:29:57.313 --> 00:29:59.480 align:center
Be unforgettable!
00:29:59.563 --> 00:30:01.688 align:center
I said, what's our goal?
00:30:01.771 --> 00:30:03.646 align:center
Be unforgettable!
00:30:03.730 --> 00:30:05.063 align:center
I think I'm gonna vom!
00:30:05.146 --> 00:30:07.605 align:center
I can't keep going.
My nipples are bleeding.
00:30:07.688 --> 00:30:10.563 align:center
Anyone bitching is gonna get
20 more burpees.
00:30:12.021 --> 00:30:12.896 align:center
Okay.
00:30:13.605 --> 00:30:14.813 align:center
That wasn't the worst.
00:30:15.605 --> 00:30:18.605 align:center
- Just let me die here.
- Oh, I can't feel my ass.
00:30:18.688 --> 00:30:19.813 align:center
There, there.
00:30:19.896 --> 00:30:23.563 align:center
Every great routine
starts with great leads.
00:30:23.646 --> 00:30:26.021 align:center
But it's not just about
being the best dancer.
00:30:26.105 --> 00:30:29.480 align:center
You have to be the total package.
We're talking effortless confidence.
00:30:29.563 --> 00:30:31.063 align:center
Infectious energy.
00:30:31.146 --> 00:30:32.605 align:center
Raccoon agility.
00:30:32.688 --> 00:30:35.771 align:center
- Undeniable charisma.
- And the sex appeal of your first cousin.
00:30:36.855 --> 00:30:39.230 align:center
But first,
let's talk about this year's routine.
00:30:39.313 --> 00:30:41.313 align:center
The theme is…
00:30:45.855 --> 00:30:47.980 align:center
Bollywood Shaadi: Greatest Hits!
00:30:48.063 --> 00:30:49.605 align:center
- Yeah!
- Ooh!
00:30:49.688 --> 00:30:52.396 align:center
An epic love letter
to South Asian weddings.
00:30:52.480 --> 00:30:54.938 align:center
A classic love story
about forbidden romance.
00:30:57.021 --> 00:30:58.605 align:center
Sorry. Sorry. Keep going.
00:30:58.688 --> 00:31:01.313 align:center
No, please. You clearly have thoughts.
00:31:01.396 --> 00:31:05.271 align:center
Well, I'm not trying to be whatever
or anything. It's just…
00:31:06.021 --> 00:31:08.730 align:center
- Isn't this kind of super predictable?
- Maya.
00:31:08.813 --> 00:31:11.855 align:center
I mean, it just sounds like something
a white person would think is a good idea.
00:31:11.938 --> 00:31:12.896 align:center
No offense, Harry.
00:31:12.980 --> 00:31:14.688 align:center
None taken. I freakin' love it.
00:31:14.771 --> 00:31:17.230 align:center
I'm not trying to be whatever,
but what the hell do you know?
00:31:17.313 --> 00:31:20.271 align:center
- You've never even competed.
- Yeah. Weddings are kind of our thing.
00:31:20.355 --> 00:31:23.771 align:center
So is dominating the spelling bee, but
you don't see that being a dance theme.
00:31:23.855 --> 00:31:25.521 align:center
Whoa, spelling bee dance.
00:31:25.605 --> 00:31:27.313 align:center
Our culture is bigger than Bollywood.
00:31:27.396 --> 00:31:30.813 align:center
If we wanna win Best of the Best, we have
to do something that feels singular.
00:31:30.896 --> 00:31:33.313 align:center
Like what? Taking a robot to the face?
00:31:37.771 --> 00:31:39.896 align:center
Whatever. Anjali agrees with me.
00:31:41.021 --> 00:31:45.646 align:center
Uh… well, I mean, Maya's right.
It is a little expected.
00:31:45.730 --> 00:31:47.355 align:center
Uh… but…
00:31:47.438 --> 00:31:49.771 align:center
there is a lot of potential there,
00:31:49.855 --> 00:31:53.355 align:center
so there's a world
where a wedding theme might work.
00:31:53.438 --> 00:31:55.605 align:center
Anj, are you seriously
going Switzerland on me right now?
00:31:55.688 --> 00:32:00.146 align:center
I dig the passion, Maya, but nostalgia
scores, on average, 60% higher.
00:32:00.230 --> 00:32:01.855 align:center
The judges will love this.
00:32:01.938 --> 00:32:04.521 align:center
Or they'll think
we're cliché and extra, so…
00:32:04.605 --> 00:32:05.688 align:center
Ooh…
00:32:06.438 --> 00:32:07.896 align:center
Okay. All right.
00:32:08.396 --> 00:32:12.271 align:center
I see. You think all this is beneath you.
00:32:12.355 --> 00:32:15.105 align:center
You think that Bollywood is too flashy,
00:32:15.188 --> 00:32:18.188 align:center
too over the top to be worth your time?
00:32:18.271 --> 00:32:22.396 align:center
Thing is, extra isn't an insult
in this world, Maya. It's the point.
00:32:23.063 --> 00:32:24.646 align:center
- 'Cause life is extra.
- Mm-hmm.
00:32:24.730 --> 00:32:29.146 align:center
You're not sad when your mother dies.
You're… you're shattered, right?
00:32:29.230 --> 00:32:32.480 align:center
You're not happy when you fall in love.
You're euphoric!
00:32:32.980 --> 00:32:34.730 align:center
That's how it actually feels.
00:32:35.230 --> 00:32:37.896 align:center
Bollywood is a celebration of being extra,
00:32:37.980 --> 00:32:41.480 align:center
because to be extra… is to be human.
00:32:42.438 --> 00:32:45.230 align:center
If you think that's tacky,
I don't know what to tell you.
00:32:45.313 --> 00:32:48.188 align:center
But, look, the floor is open
if you got a better idea.
00:32:53.105 --> 00:32:55.063 align:center
Bollywood Shaadi it is.
00:32:55.146 --> 00:32:57.021 align:center
Two leads, bride and groom.
00:32:57.105 --> 00:32:59.688 align:center
Hands up if you wanna be considered
for the groom.
00:32:59.771 --> 00:33:00.813 align:center
Oh!
00:33:00.896 --> 00:33:02.605 align:center
Really? The white boy?
00:33:02.688 --> 00:33:04.730 align:center
And hands up for the bride.
00:33:04.813 --> 00:33:06.938 align:center
Deepica. Sumi.
00:33:08.438 --> 00:33:09.855 align:center
Maya.
00:33:11.855 --> 00:33:14.855 align:center
Anjali. Seriously, get that hand up.
00:33:15.355 --> 00:33:18.980 align:center
- Oh, I'm good.
- Come on. Don't be boring.
00:33:24.855 --> 00:33:27.146 align:center
Dude. Go for it.
00:33:30.188 --> 00:33:31.063 align:center
There we go.
00:33:31.146 --> 00:33:35.396 align:center
Perfect. Voting ends
after our dry run at Beta Sigma Eta.
00:33:35.480 --> 00:33:37.230 align:center
- That's what I heard too.
- Harry.
00:33:37.313 --> 00:33:38.438 align:center
Mmm?
00:33:38.521 --> 00:33:41.313 align:center
Don't tell anyone,
but you got my vote for lead.
00:33:41.396 --> 00:33:42.271 align:center
- For real?
- Yeah.
00:33:42.355 --> 00:33:43.896 align:center
You've been crushing it.
00:33:43.980 --> 00:33:45.105 align:center
Thanks, bhai.
00:33:45.188 --> 00:33:48.021 align:center
What the… That's actually racist.
Harry, don't listen to his bullshit.
00:33:48.105 --> 00:33:51.855 align:center
Yo, newb. You really want Ted Lasso
leading the Bollywood team? No offense.
00:33:51.938 --> 00:33:53.146 align:center
Better than Indian Tupac.
00:33:53.230 --> 00:33:55.813 align:center
We all know those are glamor muscles,
useless in real combat.
00:33:55.896 --> 00:33:57.646 align:center
Okay! That's enough!
00:34:01.063 --> 00:34:02.896 align:center
Five, six, seven, eight.
00:34:02.980 --> 00:34:04.313 align:center
Ah, ah, ah.
00:34:04.396 --> 00:34:07.230 align:center
Drop top, pawn shop
Will I sell it? Hell, nah
00:34:07.313 --> 00:34:08.313 align:center
Stop. Stop!
00:34:08.396 --> 00:34:11.646 align:center
- Christ, we look like a Zumba class.
- The newbs were all over the place.
00:34:11.730 --> 00:34:14.563 align:center
Okay, well, that half of the team
is being geriatric as hell.
00:34:14.646 --> 00:34:17.271 align:center
Come on.
No fighting in front of the white people.
00:34:17.355 --> 00:34:20.021 align:center
Bossman, half the team's out
for midterms. Why are we doing this show?
00:34:20.105 --> 00:34:20.938 align:center
We need the money.
00:34:21.021 --> 00:34:24.438 align:center
- Let's steal the recycling and go to Vons.
- Okay. Uh… I'm gonna cancel.
00:34:24.521 --> 00:34:26.021 align:center
- We can't be seen like this.
- What? No…
00:34:26.105 --> 00:34:28.313 align:center
Oh! Look at these losers.
00:34:28.396 --> 00:34:30.313 align:center
I couldn't agree more.
00:34:30.396 --> 00:34:31.313 align:center
Selena.
00:34:32.688 --> 00:34:35.480 align:center
- What the hell are you doing here?
- Okay, hostile.
00:34:35.563 --> 00:34:38.396 align:center
- Always so serious, this one.
- You better not be filming.
00:34:38.480 --> 00:34:40.480 align:center
You think we came here
to bite your choreo?
00:34:40.563 --> 00:34:42.480 align:center
Stole everything else I showed you.
00:34:42.563 --> 00:34:45.230 align:center
And won a championship
and a microbrand deal with the Gap,
00:34:45.313 --> 00:34:46.313 align:center
so maybe I'm just,
00:34:46.396 --> 00:34:48.105 align:center
I don't know, better?
00:34:48.188 --> 00:34:50.605 align:center
I knew this was a rebuilding year,
00:34:50.688 --> 00:34:52.563 align:center
but this is just pathetic.
00:34:53.105 --> 00:34:55.980 align:center
Taking in TikTok leftovers.
00:34:56.063 --> 00:34:58.063 align:center
Mmm. You must be really desperate.
00:34:58.146 --> 00:35:01.605 align:center
Not as desperate as driving to a school
you don't even go to
00:35:01.688 --> 00:35:03.230 align:center
to spy on the competition.
00:35:03.313 --> 00:35:04.188 align:center
Ooh!
00:35:04.271 --> 00:35:07.021 align:center
But I'm not seeing any competition.
00:35:07.105 --> 00:35:08.230 align:center
How about you guys?
00:35:08.313 --> 00:35:12.688 align:center
All I see is a jackass
trying really hard to be cool again.
00:35:13.980 --> 00:35:15.980 align:center
The hell did you call my friend?
00:35:16.563 --> 00:35:20.396 align:center
Hey, white boy! You deaf?
00:35:20.480 --> 00:35:22.855 align:center
Or is your Hindi not that good?
00:35:22.938 --> 00:35:25.480 align:center
My Hindi is perfectly fine, jerk!
00:35:25.563 --> 00:35:26.980 align:center
Piece of shit!
00:35:28.230 --> 00:35:29.355 align:center
- Get him!
- Hey, hey!
00:35:29.438 --> 00:35:30.521 align:center
Stop!
00:35:31.021 --> 00:35:32.688 align:center
What the hell is goin' on here?
00:35:32.771 --> 00:35:34.563 align:center
I didn't pay you to fight.
I paid you to dance,
00:35:34.646 --> 00:35:37.105 align:center
so the university thinks
we're welcoming to students of color.
00:35:37.188 --> 00:35:40.313 align:center
Yeah, we got suspended because
they think we can't tell you guys apart.
00:35:40.396 --> 00:35:41.855 align:center
Y'all ready to go up or what?
00:35:41.938 --> 00:35:43.563 align:center
If not, you better
Venmo me back the money.
00:35:43.646 --> 00:35:46.021 align:center
- Oh, we're different teams, man.
- Oh, no! Please, don't.
00:35:46.105 --> 00:35:48.855 align:center
We're super poor,
and we really need the money.
00:35:48.938 --> 00:35:51.646 align:center
Is it okay
if just the three of us go on and perform?
00:35:51.730 --> 00:35:54.105 align:center
I don't care. Just make it look cool.
00:36:17.480 --> 00:36:19.688 align:center
This is insane. We gotta respond.
00:36:19.771 --> 00:36:23.605 align:center
- Let's put bleach in their water bottles.
- What? No. I meant with a routine.
00:36:24.355 --> 00:36:25.313 align:center
Yeah, me too.
00:36:25.396 --> 00:36:26.980 align:center
Look, our routine is nowhere near ready.
00:36:27.063 --> 00:36:30.355 align:center
If a half-assed version of it leaks online
and a judge sees it, we're screwed.
00:36:30.438 --> 00:36:31.771 align:center
"We're screwed."
00:36:33.313 --> 00:36:35.271 align:center
- You're not gonna let it go, are you?
- Nope.
00:36:35.355 --> 00:36:37.105 align:center
- We're going rogue, aren't we?
- That's right.
00:36:37.188 --> 00:36:38.980 align:center
- I can't talk you out of it? Okay.
- Nah.
00:36:39.063 --> 00:36:41.938 align:center
- Yo, what are they doing?
- Hey. Where are you guys goin'?
00:36:54.313 --> 00:36:55.521 align:center
Watch out.
00:37:03.938 --> 00:37:05.188 align:center
Hey, my turn.
00:37:05.271 --> 00:37:06.396 align:center
All yours, Anj.
00:37:06.480 --> 00:37:07.438 align:center
Got you.
00:37:09.938 --> 00:37:11.146 align:center
Ooh-hoo!
00:37:21.771 --> 00:37:23.438 align:center
We gotta see this.
00:37:47.938 --> 00:37:50.938 align:center
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
00:37:51.021 --> 00:37:53.313 align:center
Hey! Hey! Hey!
00:37:56.230 --> 00:38:00.188 align:center
Genius! You took advantage of a frat guy
while he was passed out. Legends.
00:38:00.271 --> 00:38:03.146 align:center
Oh, and the look on Selena's face.
I mean, she was speechless.
00:38:03.230 --> 00:38:04.646 align:center
Steak night, baby!
00:38:04.730 --> 00:38:06.771 align:center
- Yeah.
- I can't tonight. I have that problem set.
00:38:06.855 --> 00:38:08.563 align:center
Oh. Uh, you know what, guys?
00:38:09.063 --> 00:38:11.355 align:center
We'll rain check.
We're gonna have a ramen night tonight.
00:38:11.438 --> 00:38:13.230 align:center
Ooh, ramen noodles? Send pics.
00:38:13.313 --> 00:38:15.521 align:center
Send "noods." Get it?
00:38:16.480 --> 00:38:17.438 align:center
Nerds.
00:38:19.105 --> 00:38:19.980 align:center
Hey, Anj.
00:38:20.605 --> 00:38:22.188 align:center
Thanks for sticking by me tonight.
00:38:22.271 --> 00:38:24.438 align:center
I got you! Always.
00:38:25.063 --> 00:38:28.105 align:center
But my bladder is about to burst.
I'm gonna go look for a restroom.
00:38:28.188 --> 00:38:29.646 align:center
All right. Okay.
00:38:34.146 --> 00:38:36.855 align:center
But didn't it feel so good
to beat Selena's ass?
00:38:36.938 --> 00:38:38.021 align:center
Of course it did.
00:38:38.105 --> 00:38:41.771 align:center
But I specifically asked Maya
not to engage, and she did it anyway.
00:38:41.855 --> 00:38:44.396 align:center
Like, literally, she finds
every opportunity to undermine me.
00:38:44.480 --> 00:38:46.605 align:center
Okay. The votes are in.
00:38:46.688 --> 00:38:48.230 align:center
Five votes for Vishal,
00:38:48.313 --> 00:38:49.563 align:center
six for Harry,
00:38:49.646 --> 00:38:52.146 align:center
and 11 for Ronak.
00:38:52.230 --> 00:38:53.438 align:center
Ronak is the groom lead.
00:38:53.521 --> 00:38:54.563 align:center
And for the bride?
00:38:54.646 --> 00:38:56.980 align:center
Uh… one for Deepica.
00:38:57.063 --> 00:38:58.646 align:center
Two for Sumi.
00:38:58.730 --> 00:39:00.396 align:center
- Sumi?
- Four for me.
00:39:00.480 --> 00:39:02.771 align:center
Seven for Anjali.
00:39:02.855 --> 00:39:05.480 align:center
And eight for Maya.
00:39:06.521 --> 00:39:08.105 align:center
- You're kidding me.
- Seriously?
00:39:08.188 --> 00:39:09.146 align:center
No, check it again.
00:39:09.230 --> 00:39:11.355 align:center
Drone Strike is gonna be
the face of our team?
00:39:11.438 --> 00:39:13.105 align:center
Okay, Ronak, who'd you vote for?
00:39:13.188 --> 00:39:14.938 align:center
- Anjali.
- Deeps, how about you?
00:39:15.021 --> 00:39:16.146 align:center
I voted for myself.
00:39:17.563 --> 00:39:21.313 align:center
You know, Deeps, it's not against
the rules to change your vote to Anjali.
00:39:21.396 --> 00:39:26.105 align:center
If you did, she and Maya would be tied,
and the captain is…
00:39:27.938 --> 00:39:29.521 align:center
…the captain is the tie…
00:39:29.605 --> 00:39:33.605 align:center
The captain is the tiebreaker!
Ronak, you can make Anjali lead.
00:39:37.730 --> 00:39:40.146 align:center
I mean, technically,
that is all aboveboard.
00:39:40.230 --> 00:39:42.480 align:center
- Totally not breaking any rules.
- Uh-uh.
00:39:42.563 --> 00:39:46.021 align:center
Anjali, she just feels like a lead.
She's so positive and so--
00:39:46.105 --> 00:39:49.355 align:center
So beautiful! So elegant!
Just looking like a wow!
00:39:49.438 --> 00:39:52.771 align:center
I mean, Anjali does have lead energy.
00:39:52.855 --> 00:39:55.146 align:center
And Maya's impossible to control.
00:39:55.230 --> 00:39:58.563 align:center
Plus, if the judges have to stare
at Maya's goofy ass front and center,
00:39:58.646 --> 00:39:59.938 align:center
we're never gonna win.
00:40:01.480 --> 00:40:04.813 align:center
I've thought about this deeply.
I'm changing my vote to Anjali.
00:40:15.521 --> 00:40:16.438 align:center
Hey!
00:40:16.938 --> 00:40:18.021 align:center
Whatcha doin'?
00:40:18.855 --> 00:40:22.146 align:center
Nothing. Just sitting
on this soft, soft grass.
00:40:22.230 --> 00:40:24.855 align:center
That was so fun.
00:40:24.938 --> 00:40:26.980 align:center
Oh, you were incredible, Maya, really.
00:40:27.730 --> 00:40:28.980 align:center
Thanks.
00:40:31.313 --> 00:40:32.605 align:center
Hey. You okay?
00:40:34.980 --> 00:40:36.105 align:center
It's nothing.
00:40:36.188 --> 00:40:37.355 align:center
I just, um…
00:40:38.563 --> 00:40:42.230 align:center
I just overheard the team, uh, talking.
00:40:42.313 --> 00:40:44.188 align:center
Sorry. Let me make sure it's not my mom.
00:40:44.688 --> 00:40:45.730 align:center
Oh, yeah.
00:40:46.771 --> 00:40:48.771 align:center
Oh my God, Ronak just emailed the team.
00:40:50.188 --> 00:40:51.730 align:center
I made lead.
00:40:53.605 --> 00:40:55.021 align:center
I made lead!
00:40:56.438 --> 00:40:57.396 align:center
Oh my God!
00:40:57.480 --> 00:40:59.980 align:center
- Dude, congrats!
- Really?
00:41:00.730 --> 00:41:03.896 align:center
- Are you sure you're cool with this?
- Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?
00:41:03.980 --> 00:41:06.355 align:center
I don't know. I mean, you wanted lead too.
00:41:06.438 --> 00:41:07.438 align:center
Yeah, but
00:41:08.605 --> 00:41:09.813 align:center
you got more votes.
00:41:10.313 --> 00:41:12.480 align:center
Still, I just wanna make sure…
00:41:13.188 --> 00:41:16.521 align:center
I am so happy for you. Okay?
00:41:16.605 --> 00:41:17.813 align:center
Oh my God!
00:41:17.896 --> 00:41:20.146 align:center
But there are
more pressing matters to discuss,
00:41:20.230 --> 00:41:23.480 align:center
such as you owe me
some mother-F'ing Taco Bell.
00:41:23.563 --> 00:41:24.896 align:center
Pay up. I'm hungry.
00:41:27.355 --> 00:41:29.771 align:center
Check your e-mail. I think
you've got a committee assignment.
00:41:29.855 --> 00:41:30.896 align:center
Hmm?
00:41:30.980 --> 00:41:32.813 align:center
Hello?
00:41:32.896 --> 00:41:36.188 align:center
Yeah, I just saw. I'm so pumped!
00:41:44.938 --> 00:41:46.646 align:center
You know what the best part is?
00:41:47.146 --> 00:41:51.105 align:center
You only need one coat of this sealant
to get that really nice sheen.
00:41:51.188 --> 00:41:53.813 align:center
Not the semi-sheen. Full gloss.
00:41:53.896 --> 00:41:55.396 align:center
Ain't that a bitch.
00:41:55.480 --> 00:41:57.771 align:center
- Thank you, young man.
- Hey, you are welcome, sir.
00:41:59.146 --> 00:42:01.813 align:center
I say this with great respect.
00:42:02.313 --> 00:42:03.355 align:center
You look like a Minion.
00:42:04.438 --> 00:42:06.063 align:center
And I say this with great respect.
00:42:06.146 --> 00:42:07.063 align:center
A-banana!
00:42:08.313 --> 00:42:10.271 align:center
- No, honestly, it's a pretty sweet gig.
- Hm.
00:42:10.355 --> 00:42:11.855 align:center
The boomers treat me like a genius,
00:42:11.938 --> 00:42:14.646 align:center
and they even let me
work on my own projects.
00:42:14.730 --> 00:42:16.688 align:center
Oh! What kind of projects?
00:42:16.771 --> 00:42:18.771 align:center
- Uh, ever heard of Nunya?
- Mm?
00:42:19.271 --> 00:42:20.938 align:center
Nunya business?
00:42:21.021 --> 00:42:23.813 align:center
Oh, mm! Mm-mm-mm!
00:42:23.896 --> 00:42:26.896 align:center
So, we talking chicken coops
or bird houses?
00:42:26.980 --> 00:42:29.855 align:center
Which technically, in theory,
is also a bird house.
00:42:29.938 --> 00:42:32.605 align:center
Tsk. Come on, tell me. What projects?
00:42:34.271 --> 00:42:36.230 align:center
- Okay. Come on. Come on.
- Yes.
00:42:36.896 --> 00:42:38.896 align:center
This is a Chandigarh chair.
00:42:38.980 --> 00:42:40.563 align:center
So, after the British left,
00:42:40.646 --> 00:42:43.396 align:center
Nehru wanted India to move forward,
andnot be stuck in the past,
00:42:43.480 --> 00:42:47.021 align:center
so he commissions all this cool, modern
furniture for the government to use.
00:42:47.105 --> 00:42:49.646 align:center
And some of these babies
sell for, like, two grand a pop.
00:42:49.730 --> 00:42:51.813 align:center
All right, settle down, Bob the Builder.
00:42:52.313 --> 00:42:57.771 align:center
Unfortunately, this makes you…
the perfect person for me to bother.
00:42:58.271 --> 00:43:00.521 align:center
I need to make this doli
for our corny-ass routine.
00:43:00.605 --> 00:43:01.813 align:center
Wait, hold on a second.
00:43:01.896 --> 00:43:04.646 align:center
Ronak put you on props? I thought
you were trying out for the lead.
00:43:04.730 --> 00:43:05.938 align:center
Emphasis on "tried."
00:43:06.855 --> 00:43:08.396 align:center
Shit. I'm sorry, dude.
00:43:09.271 --> 00:43:13.105 align:center
Well, hey, listen, I'm sure whoever
did get it sucks, like, as a person.
00:43:13.188 --> 00:43:16.063 align:center
I'm sure they dip their pizza in ranch,
and use speakerphone in public,
00:43:16.146 --> 00:43:17.480 align:center
and complain about subtitles.
00:43:17.563 --> 00:43:19.980 align:center
- They picked Anjali.
- Oh my God. That is amazing.
00:43:20.063 --> 00:43:21.355 align:center
We love her. Okay.
00:43:24.063 --> 00:43:27.730 align:center
You know what?
I say let's pimp this thing out a bit.
00:43:27.813 --> 00:43:31.105 align:center
But, first of all, we are gonna need
some special pins for these hinges.
00:43:31.188 --> 00:43:32.730 align:center
Your team is gonna lose their shit.
00:43:34.521 --> 00:43:37.980 align:center
Maya, we were filming the intro video.
What are we doin' here?
00:43:38.063 --> 00:43:40.980 align:center
Dude, just breathe and unclench
before you get your boxers in a bunch, hm?
00:43:41.063 --> 00:43:43.813 align:center
Not possible. They're heavily starched.
00:43:45.021 --> 00:43:47.980 align:center
Okay. Anyway, I've got
something cool to show you guys.
00:43:48.563 --> 00:43:53.146 align:center
Something that's gonna make
those trust fund losers at USC cower.
00:43:53.230 --> 00:43:55.105 align:center
Presenting…
00:43:57.521 --> 00:43:58.646 align:center
the doli!
00:43:58.730 --> 00:44:00.105 align:center
Ooh!
00:44:00.188 --> 00:44:03.271 align:center
Maya, this looks nothing like
the pictures I sent you.
00:44:03.355 --> 00:44:04.521 align:center
Okay, well, just…
00:44:04.605 --> 00:44:05.688 align:center
Here.
00:44:06.480 --> 00:44:08.688 align:center
When Anjali gets on… Right?
00:44:15.313 --> 00:44:16.855 align:center
Huh?
00:44:16.938 --> 00:44:17.938 align:center
This is fire.
00:44:18.021 --> 00:44:21.605 align:center
If we're stuck doing a wedding theme,
we might as well do it with some panache.
00:44:21.688 --> 00:44:23.063 align:center
Absolutely not.
00:44:23.646 --> 00:44:24.938 align:center
But why?
00:44:25.021 --> 00:44:26.855 align:center
We asked for something
traditional and elegant.
00:44:26.938 --> 00:44:28.521 align:center
Not a vaping tiger.
00:44:28.605 --> 00:44:31.396 align:center
It's a fog machine blowing flower petals.
It's not that deep.
00:44:31.480 --> 00:44:33.480 align:center
We haven't even practiced with this thing.
00:44:33.563 --> 00:44:35.730 align:center
Okay? I can't have unknown variables
messing us up.
00:44:35.813 --> 00:44:37.855 align:center
Come on! We need to stand out, Ronak.
00:44:37.938 --> 00:44:41.896 align:center
That's why Anjali's the lead. It's her job
to make us stand out, not yours.
00:44:41.980 --> 00:44:46.521 align:center
We leave for San Diego in 24 hours.
Let's go. Back to rehearsal, everyone.
00:44:48.521 --> 00:44:50.646 align:center
This is also the easiest exam of the year.
00:44:50.730 --> 00:44:53.980 align:center
It only gets harder, so plan accordingly.
00:44:54.063 --> 00:44:57.105 align:center
I'm not trying to put a target
on your back, but you set the curve.
00:44:57.188 --> 00:44:58.605 align:center
Sleep with one eye open.
00:44:59.188 --> 00:45:00.563 align:center
Anjali…
00:45:02.271 --> 00:45:03.730 align:center
Stay as long as you need.
00:45:10.605 --> 00:45:13.188 align:center
It's time to strap in.
00:45:13.271 --> 00:45:15.271 align:center
Competition season starts now.
00:45:16.813 --> 00:45:18.688 align:center
Over 100 teams.
00:45:19.480 --> 00:45:21.896 align:center
Over 2,000 dancers.
00:45:22.396 --> 00:45:23.855 align:center
But tonight,
00:45:23.938 --> 00:45:26.605 align:center
only the best move forward.
00:45:28.980 --> 00:45:30.230 align:center
UCLA, on deck!
00:45:30.313 --> 00:45:31.271 align:center
All right!
00:45:31.355 --> 00:45:33.855 align:center
Vishal! Last look on costumes.
Come on, man!
00:45:33.938 --> 00:45:35.480 align:center
Maya, don't forget to check the doli.
00:45:35.563 --> 00:45:36.646 align:center
- Dude, I am right here.
- Oh.
00:45:36.730 --> 00:45:39.813 align:center
Yo, is it true that Selena got some
crypto billionaire to fund their team?
00:45:39.896 --> 00:45:42.855 align:center
Yeah, but he made them redo their entire
routine to be about climate change.
00:45:42.938 --> 00:45:44.438 align:center
- She's so cooked.
- Good one!
00:45:44.521 --> 00:45:47.730 align:center
Next up, we've got
the coldest killers on the circuit,
00:45:47.813 --> 00:45:51.521 align:center
the reigning champions, USC Tamasha!
00:45:51.605 --> 00:45:54.146 align:center
What the hell?
00:45:56.563 --> 00:46:00.646 align:center
This is the story of
the first man who climbed Mount Everest.
00:46:01.271 --> 00:46:05.605 align:center
This is not the story
of the first man who made it back alive.
00:46:18.105 --> 00:46:21.063 align:center
Mount Everest Ain't got shit on me
00:46:23.521 --> 00:46:27.188 align:center
Mount Everest ain't got shit on me
00:46:27.271 --> 00:46:29.730 align:center
'Cause I'm on top of the world
00:46:29.813 --> 00:46:32.605 align:center
I'm on top of the world
00:46:32.688 --> 00:46:33.563 align:center
Yeah
00:46:53.688 --> 00:46:55.938 align:center
Wait a minute
Get it how you live it
00:46:56.021 --> 00:46:58.313 align:center
Ten toes in
When we standing on business
00:46:58.396 --> 00:47:00.980 align:center
- Get him!
- He's escaping!
00:47:01.646 --> 00:47:04.271 align:center
I'm a big stepper, underground methods
00:47:04.355 --> 00:47:06.563 align:center
Top-notch hoes get the most
Not the lesser
00:47:21.563 --> 00:47:23.063 align:center
We have the human.
00:47:23.146 --> 00:47:24.605 align:center
Bring him to me.
00:47:33.105 --> 00:47:37.188 align:center
Wait, wait, wait, wait a minute
Get, get, get, get it how you live it
00:47:37.271 --> 00:47:39.188 align:center
Ten, ten, ten, standin' on business
00:47:49.896 --> 00:47:51.813 align:center
USC Tamasha!
00:47:51.896 --> 00:47:54.730 align:center
She just murdered you, Ronak.
That's crazy.
00:47:55.313 --> 00:47:58.896 align:center
- They are really good.
- Ready for the next dance?
00:47:58.980 --> 00:48:01.188 align:center
Come on. Let's just let this thing rip.
00:48:01.271 --> 00:48:04.646 align:center
We should be
pulling out all the stops, hmm?
00:48:07.105 --> 00:48:08.855 align:center
Could we just stick to the plan this time?
00:48:10.188 --> 00:48:13.605 align:center
I'm just really nervous about this.
I want it to go well.
00:48:13.688 --> 00:48:15.271 align:center
Okay, yeah, totally.
00:48:18.730 --> 00:48:19.563 align:center
Hey.
00:48:21.021 --> 00:48:22.188 align:center
You're gonna do great.
00:48:22.271 --> 00:48:25.313 align:center
Coming to the stage, last year's
Best of the Best runners-up,
00:48:25.396 --> 00:48:27.938 align:center
UCLA Agni!
00:48:31.646 --> 00:48:34.480 align:center
Their love was forbidden.
00:48:34.563 --> 00:48:37.271 align:center
She had everything to lose.
00:48:37.355 --> 00:48:40.105 align:center
He had nothing to lose.
00:48:40.896 --> 00:48:44.105 align:center
But desire doesn't ask for permission.
00:49:25.438 --> 00:49:27.480 align:center
He keeps me guessing
00:49:27.563 --> 00:49:29.563 align:center
- Guessing
- Spontaneous
00:49:29.646 --> 00:49:31.730 align:center
- That's how he is
- He's so persuasive
00:49:31.813 --> 00:49:34.313 align:center
- So persuasive
- And I'm his lady
00:49:41.396 --> 00:49:44.646 align:center
Will you be mine
in this life and the next?
00:49:44.730 --> 00:49:47.563 align:center
Any life without you isn't worth living.
00:49:50.271 --> 00:49:52.105 align:center
But they were too late.
00:49:52.188 --> 00:49:55.688 align:center
Asha's parents had already betrothed her
to the diplomat's son.
00:50:11.563 --> 00:50:13.063 align:center
Fantastic dress.
00:50:14.855 --> 00:50:16.271 align:center
Choose honor, Asha.
00:50:18.021 --> 00:50:19.730 align:center
Choose passion.
00:50:20.230 --> 00:50:21.980 align:center
Thinkin' of a master plan
00:50:22.063 --> 00:50:25.188 align:center
You know anything you need, baby
Ask your man
00:50:55.938 --> 00:50:57.646 align:center
What the…
00:50:57.730 --> 00:50:58.813 align:center
Oh!
00:51:03.188 --> 00:51:04.730 align:center
I love you, Asha!
00:51:04.813 --> 00:51:06.980 align:center
I love you more, Rehan!
00:51:08.063 --> 00:51:09.480 align:center
Can anyone see?
00:51:09.563 --> 00:51:11.813 align:center
- I have asthma!
- Dimple, where are you?
00:51:11.896 --> 00:51:15.146 align:center
- Mummy!
- Oh! Harry, watch out!
00:51:15.230 --> 00:51:16.646 align:center
Oh my God!
00:51:16.730 --> 00:51:18.146 align:center
Aah!
00:51:18.230 --> 00:51:19.771 align:center
- Shit.
- Anjali!
00:51:21.563 --> 00:51:24.105 align:center
Oh! No, no, no, no!
00:51:24.188 --> 00:51:26.063 align:center
- No! Ow, ow, ow!
- No! Stop!
00:51:26.146 --> 00:51:27.813 align:center
- Stop!
- Ow!
00:51:27.896 --> 00:51:29.230 align:center
Keep dancing!
00:51:29.313 --> 00:51:30.563 align:center
Oh no!
00:51:30.646 --> 00:51:32.230 align:center
No! Wait, hold on!
00:51:32.313 --> 00:51:34.396 align:center
Stop, stop!
00:51:34.896 --> 00:51:35.938 align:center
No! No!
00:51:36.021 --> 00:51:38.605 align:center
- I got it. Go.
- No, no, no! No!
00:51:46.063 --> 00:51:49.480 align:center
- That was so embarrassing!
- No, that was so, so bad.
00:51:49.563 --> 00:51:52.896 align:center
- Who messed up? Harry, was it you?
- What the hell happened, everyone?
00:51:52.980 --> 00:51:56.021 align:center
Guys, I… I am so sorry. I am so, so sorry.
00:51:56.105 --> 00:51:58.438 align:center
I genuinely have no idea
how that happened.
00:51:59.438 --> 00:52:00.396 align:center
- Oh, my…
- What?
00:52:00.480 --> 00:52:01.855 align:center
Anjali…
00:52:01.938 --> 00:52:03.146 align:center
What?
00:52:03.230 --> 00:52:07.021 align:center
I was raised not to comment
on women's appearances, but goddamn!
00:52:07.105 --> 00:52:08.730 align:center
- Uh…
- Nirbhay, what?
00:52:09.563 --> 00:52:10.563 align:center
Nirbhay…
00:52:14.105 --> 00:52:16.021 align:center
Oh, where's my hair?
00:52:16.105 --> 00:52:17.980 align:center
My God, where's my hair? Where did it go?
00:52:18.063 --> 00:52:19.521 align:center
Why is there a hole right here?
00:52:19.605 --> 00:52:22.188 align:center
- Where is my hair? Where did…
- It was the only way.
00:52:23.813 --> 00:52:26.605 align:center
I, I, I… It's, uh, interesting.
It looks good.
00:52:26.688 --> 00:52:28.563 align:center
- Shit, shit.
- Okay. It's just hair.
00:52:28.646 --> 00:52:30.813 align:center
It was an accident,
and maybe I can make it look cool.
00:52:30.896 --> 00:52:32.688 align:center
- I can make it look cool, right?
- Yes.
00:52:32.771 --> 00:52:34.896 align:center
- Tell me it'll grow back!
- Very chic…
00:52:34.980 --> 00:52:35.980 align:center
This is so bad.
00:52:36.063 --> 00:52:37.813 align:center
- But you're so pretty.
- We can make it nice…
00:52:37.896 --> 00:52:40.771 align:center
- You turned it on, didn't you?
- No, Ronak, it was an accident!
00:52:40.855 --> 00:52:42.813 align:center
It was an accident. Right?
00:52:45.230 --> 00:52:46.146 align:center
Right?
00:52:47.855 --> 00:52:48.688 align:center
I'm sorry.
00:52:49.563 --> 00:52:51.146 align:center
I'm so, so sorry.
00:52:51.230 --> 00:52:53.730 align:center
- That wasn't meant to happen.
- What were you thinking?
00:52:53.813 --> 00:52:56.771 align:center
It is a miracle
that she's not in the hospital!
00:52:56.855 --> 00:52:59.146 align:center
And you completely screwed
our chances at placing.
00:52:59.230 --> 00:53:01.855 align:center
I didn't want us to just place,
you know, I wanted us to win--
00:53:01.938 --> 00:53:03.188 align:center
Well, congrats on doing neither!
00:53:03.271 --> 00:53:04.938 align:center
We weren't gonna beat USC.
00:53:05.021 --> 00:53:06.688 align:center
That's not your call to make!
00:53:11.938 --> 00:53:13.188 align:center
You're off the team.
00:53:14.521 --> 00:53:15.646 align:center
- What?
- What?
00:53:17.021 --> 00:53:18.105 align:center
I said,
00:53:18.605 --> 00:53:20.855 align:center
I'm kicking your ass off the team.
00:53:20.938 --> 00:53:22.271 align:center
Are you serious?
00:53:22.355 --> 00:53:25.563 align:center
Look, every team has one, okay?
00:53:25.646 --> 00:53:27.605 align:center
The ball hog with the big attitude.
00:53:27.688 --> 00:53:29.521 align:center
Big opinions and zero solutions,
00:53:29.605 --> 00:53:32.646 align:center
and the mistake that most captains make
is they give them a pass
00:53:32.730 --> 00:53:34.230 align:center
because they're talented.
00:53:34.938 --> 00:53:36.396 align:center
And you are talented, Maya.
00:53:36.896 --> 00:53:38.980 align:center
But not enough to be worth the trouble.
00:53:50.105 --> 00:53:51.646 align:center
- Okay, let's see what we can…
- It's okay.
00:53:51.730 --> 00:53:53.313 align:center
This is devastating.
00:53:53.396 --> 00:53:56.646 align:center
UCLA plummets to 54th place.
00:53:56.730 --> 00:54:01.646 align:center
With finals next month,
it's safe to say their season is over.
00:54:01.730 --> 00:54:05.105 align:center
Ronak,
is getting back in this even possible?
00:54:06.063 --> 00:54:07.271 align:center
Yeah. Yeah, I think so.
00:54:07.355 --> 00:54:11.480 align:center
If we get first or second in Berkeley,
we technically would have enough points.
00:54:11.980 --> 00:54:14.313 align:center
Yeah, but Berkeley is an overnight trip.
00:54:14.396 --> 00:54:17.771 align:center
- We don't have the money.
- Is SASA doing the date auction this year?
00:54:17.855 --> 00:54:19.438 align:center
Yeah, next weekend.
00:54:19.521 --> 00:54:22.521 align:center
We'd need, like, the whole team to sign up
to raise enough, but…
00:54:22.605 --> 00:54:23.896 align:center
Hey, can we talk?
00:54:23.980 --> 00:54:25.563 align:center
Yeah. Yeah.
00:54:29.480 --> 00:54:32.771 align:center
- Yeah. What's up?
- Okay. Um…
00:54:34.105 --> 00:54:36.813 align:center
So I think you should reconsider
kicking Maya off the team.
00:54:36.896 --> 00:54:38.063 align:center
Not happening.
00:54:38.146 --> 00:54:40.230 align:center
I'm furious, and you should be too.
00:54:43.105 --> 00:54:45.230 align:center
I look like a flea-market Barbie doll.
00:54:45.313 --> 00:54:47.230 align:center
Trust me, I'm pissed.
00:54:47.313 --> 00:54:50.938 align:center
I know she messed up,
but kicking her out is not the move.
00:54:51.021 --> 00:54:54.355 align:center
She's the most creative dancer
on the team, and everyone knows it.
00:54:54.438 --> 00:54:57.188 align:center
If they were smarter, they would
have voted her lead to begin with.
00:54:58.480 --> 00:55:00.938 align:center
No. Listen, you're an amazing dancer,
00:55:01.021 --> 00:55:02.521 align:center
and you deserve to be the lead.
00:55:02.605 --> 00:55:04.980 align:center
Then don't I deserve a say
in who's on the team?
00:55:06.855 --> 00:55:09.063 align:center
You didn't see everyone.
Chaos and confusion.
00:55:09.146 --> 00:55:11.688 align:center
Just fog everywhere,
flower petals everywhere.
00:55:11.771 --> 00:55:12.771 align:center
It was a lot, man.
00:55:12.855 --> 00:55:14.730 align:center
That's no reason to kick you off the team.
00:55:14.813 --> 00:55:15.855 align:center
We're in 54th place.
00:55:15.938 --> 00:55:17.938 align:center
Oh my God! That is bad.
00:55:18.021 --> 00:55:19.896 align:center
- I'm sorry. Ronak's got a point.
- What?
00:55:19.980 --> 00:55:22.313 align:center
- Honestly.
- Okay. Hey, hey! Come on. Come on.
00:55:22.396 --> 00:55:25.730 align:center
Okay, well, they'd be in first place if
they'd just made you lead from the start.
00:55:25.813 --> 00:55:27.521 align:center
Yeah, well…
00:55:28.480 --> 00:55:30.605 align:center
- Well, what?
- No, nothing.
00:55:30.688 --> 00:55:32.771 align:center
Sounds like somethin'.
00:55:32.855 --> 00:55:35.605 align:center
I overheard Ronak, Deepica, and Dimple
tallying up the votes.
00:55:36.521 --> 00:55:39.355 align:center
I won lead,
but then they switched it to Anjali
00:55:39.438 --> 00:55:42.730 align:center
'cause she has more, uh… lead energy
or whatever.
00:55:43.521 --> 00:55:44.771 align:center
Are you serious?
00:55:45.438 --> 00:55:47.105 align:center
You're only lead energy.
00:55:47.188 --> 00:55:48.980 align:center
Your stage presence is magnetic.
00:55:49.063 --> 00:55:53.146 align:center
Okay? When you're up there, locked in,
hittin' those moves, doing your thing--
00:55:53.230 --> 00:55:54.813 align:center
Oh my God.
00:55:55.896 --> 00:55:57.480 align:center
- I am so sorry.
- Are you okay?
00:55:57.563 --> 00:56:00.855 align:center
There is actually a surprising amount
of hair in this wheel, okay?
00:56:00.938 --> 00:56:03.896 align:center
It is like a locker room shower drain.
Look at that.
00:56:03.980 --> 00:56:04.980 align:center
Jeez.
00:56:05.480 --> 00:56:06.605 align:center
You need to tell Anjali.
00:56:06.688 --> 00:56:09.313 align:center
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I cannot do that to her. Okay?
00:56:09.396 --> 00:56:12.980 align:center
She really likes Ronak, all right?
I mean, look.
00:56:13.480 --> 00:56:15.563 align:center
She has been fawning all over him
00:56:15.646 --> 00:56:18.563 align:center
because he got her
this weird Paddington knockoff.
00:56:18.646 --> 00:56:21.355 align:center
- Oh my God.
- What?
00:56:22.313 --> 00:56:23.688 align:center
Wait. You don't know what this is?
00:56:24.938 --> 00:56:25.813 align:center
A bear?
00:56:25.896 --> 00:56:27.938 align:center
I'm sure that's supposed to be
the Koh-i-Noor diamond.
00:56:28.021 --> 00:56:32.230 align:center
The diamond the British stole from India
that is famously known for being bad luck.
00:56:32.313 --> 00:56:34.938 align:center
Every ruler who has ever owned
the Koh-i-Noor diamond,
00:56:35.021 --> 00:56:38.813 align:center
from Shah Jahan to Duleep Singh,
they all saw their empires crumble.
00:56:38.896 --> 00:56:41.146 align:center
That is not a cute teddy bear.
00:56:41.230 --> 00:56:43.438 align:center
That is a cursed colonial diamond.
00:56:43.521 --> 00:56:45.480 align:center
So that's what you do without a phone.
00:56:45.563 --> 00:56:48.521 align:center
You read and shit.
You think you're better than me?
00:56:48.605 --> 00:56:50.230 align:center
Honestly, yeah. Kinda.
00:56:55.063 --> 00:56:57.896 align:center
I get why you don't wanna tell Anjali,
but you deserve to be lead.
00:57:02.563 --> 00:57:04.646 align:center
I need to get back to wrapping this gift.
00:57:07.771 --> 00:57:09.980 align:center
I'm a killer
I'm a killer, I'm a killer
00:57:10.063 --> 00:57:12.063 align:center
Bang, bang! Gun fingers in the mirror
00:57:12.146 --> 00:57:14.355 align:center
I won't get caught this time
00:57:14.438 --> 00:57:16.646 align:center
Commit the perfect crime
00:57:16.730 --> 00:57:19.063 align:center
I'm a killer
I'm a killer, I'm a killer…
00:57:19.146 --> 00:57:20.563 align:center
Yo, yo, yo.
00:57:21.146 --> 00:57:23.563 align:center
- Mmm? Mmm?
- Oh, you didn't have to do anything.
00:57:23.646 --> 00:57:25.688 align:center
All right, come on. Open it. Open it.
00:57:26.188 --> 00:57:28.855 align:center
I sewed in some of your hair to it,
so it should match.
00:57:28.938 --> 00:57:31.813 align:center
Oh, also, I did get you a sexy leg dress,
00:57:31.896 --> 00:57:35.813 align:center
so Ronak will be too busy
looking down there instead of up… here.
00:57:37.271 --> 00:57:38.230 align:center
I'm really sorry.
00:57:38.813 --> 00:57:43.313 align:center
I really appreciate it.
But no more surprises, yeah?
00:57:44.146 --> 00:57:46.021 align:center
Mm-hmm.
00:57:46.105 --> 00:57:47.771 align:center
I like brown girls with an accent…
00:57:47.855 --> 00:57:49.605 align:center
Hey, baby girl!
00:57:49.688 --> 00:57:51.896 align:center
Get that cute butt
and fugly hair over here!
00:57:51.980 --> 00:57:53.688 align:center
What are you guys doing here?
00:57:53.771 --> 00:57:56.688 align:center
Kidnapping you for a spa day
at the Hinoki salon.
00:57:56.771 --> 00:57:58.146 align:center
Are you serious?
00:57:58.230 --> 00:58:02.063 align:center
We have to do something about that hair.
You look like you licked a car battery.
00:58:02.146 --> 00:58:05.646 align:center
- Safeties gotta stick together.
- The hell's a safety?
00:58:05.730 --> 00:58:08.688 align:center
If no one bids on us at the date auction,
we bid on each other for safety.
00:58:08.771 --> 00:58:10.563 align:center
I can't right now. We have class.
00:58:10.646 --> 00:58:12.146 align:center
So skip it.
00:58:12.230 --> 00:58:15.605 align:center
Anj, you do have to do
that online quiz too, remember?
00:58:15.688 --> 00:58:17.021 align:center
Yeah, I know, I…
00:58:19.855 --> 00:58:23.021 align:center
Could you just do it for me?
Just this once?
00:58:23.105 --> 00:58:25.396 align:center
- Dude…
- I know. I've said that before.
00:58:25.480 --> 00:58:29.313 align:center
But, hey, you… kind of owe me.
I spoke to Ronak.
00:58:29.396 --> 00:58:32.146 align:center
- He said you could rejoin the team.
- Really?
00:58:32.230 --> 00:58:33.438 align:center
- Wait, what?
- Ronak said that?
00:58:33.521 --> 00:58:35.688 align:center
Yeah! All you have to do
is sign up for the date auction.
00:58:36.563 --> 00:58:39.605 align:center
Oh yeah, no. No. Nope. Not doing that.
00:58:39.688 --> 00:58:41.521 align:center
Why? I thought you'd be pumped.
00:58:42.605 --> 00:58:45.980 align:center
Look, if you come,
I promise I'll be your safety.
00:58:46.063 --> 00:58:48.313 align:center
- There's nothing to be scared of.
- Okay.
00:58:48.396 --> 00:58:51.230 align:center
I'm not scared. I just don't wanna do it.
00:58:51.313 --> 00:58:55.605 align:center
I'm really grateful that you talked
to Ronak for me, but… I'm good.
00:58:56.105 --> 00:58:57.105 align:center
So…
00:58:58.105 --> 00:59:00.521 align:center
Uh, I can do your quiz for you. Seriously.
00:59:01.021 --> 00:59:04.605 align:center
Go have a fun spa day with Double D.
00:59:04.688 --> 00:59:06.146 align:center
Are you sure?
00:59:06.230 --> 00:59:09.730 align:center
- Yeah. Have fun.
- Brown boys with no brown friends
00:59:09.813 --> 00:59:11.730 align:center
- Think they light-skinned…
- Okay, Anj, get in.
00:59:11.813 --> 00:59:13.605 align:center
Double D. I kind of like that.
00:59:13.688 --> 00:59:15.438 align:center
Absolutely not.
00:59:23.938 --> 00:59:25.313 align:center
Don't tell me that.
00:59:27.146 --> 00:59:31.063 align:center
I mean, that is top-notch choreo.
They were crisp. They were sharp.
00:59:34.896 --> 00:59:36.938 align:center
Wow. You look…
00:59:37.021 --> 00:59:38.396 align:center
- Stunning?
- Hot?
00:59:38.480 --> 00:59:40.730 align:center
- Gorgeous?
- Dare I say, the moment?
00:59:40.813 --> 00:59:44.521 align:center
Be honest. Do I look like
Dora the Explorer joined a sorority?
00:59:44.605 --> 00:59:46.521 align:center
I mean… vamonos.
00:59:47.105 --> 00:59:50.063 align:center
Hmm. Okay, stop flirting.
Everyone, let's get to the ballroom.
00:59:50.146 --> 00:59:51.730 align:center
We're at tables six and eight.
00:59:51.813 --> 00:59:54.980 align:center
Make sure to fill out your questionnaires,
okay? Let's go, chop-chop.
00:59:55.063 --> 00:59:55.980 align:center
Wait, hold on.
01:00:00.355 --> 01:00:02.063 align:center
Did you speak to Maya?
01:00:02.146 --> 01:00:03.855 align:center
Who won our little wager?
01:00:04.730 --> 01:00:06.605 align:center
Unfortunately, you did.
01:00:07.188 --> 01:00:09.855 align:center
Sorry. I mean,
I hate to say I told you so,
01:00:09.938 --> 01:00:11.771 align:center
but I knew she wasn't coming back.
01:00:12.396 --> 01:00:13.563 align:center
But now you…
01:00:14.146 --> 01:00:15.230 align:center
you owe me a mojito.
01:00:15.313 --> 01:00:19.230 align:center
I can tell you miss me
I can tell it hits, hits, hits
01:00:19.730 --> 01:00:22.730 align:center
Not tryna be romantic
I'll hit it from the back
01:00:22.813 --> 01:00:24.188 align:center
Just so you don't get attached…
01:00:24.271 --> 01:00:28.188 align:center
I just gotta say you guys look great,
and I appreciate you doing this.
01:00:28.271 --> 01:00:31.396 align:center
The number we're trying to hit tonight
is three grand, so…
01:00:31.480 --> 01:00:34.438 align:center
- Ooh, can you make it loud?
- Loud
01:00:34.521 --> 01:00:37.938 align:center
'Cause I'm so proud
Baby, I'm so proud of you
01:00:41.688 --> 01:00:43.438 align:center
Nice to have you back, Maya.
01:00:43.521 --> 01:00:44.521 align:center
Nice to be back.
01:00:45.021 --> 01:00:48.605 align:center
I mean, who doesn't love
selling their body for bus fare? Right?
01:00:50.105 --> 01:00:52.021 align:center
Oh my God, I love your sari.
01:00:52.105 --> 01:00:54.230 align:center
Your hair. Dude, awesome.
01:00:57.771 --> 01:01:02.730 align:center
Welcome to the 25th annual
SASA winter formal and date auction.
01:01:04.646 --> 01:01:08.813 align:center
Unfortunately, the board decided
not to have us host this year.
01:01:08.896 --> 01:01:10.355 align:center
Which is absurd!
01:01:10.438 --> 01:01:12.896 align:center
Welcome your new host for this evening,
01:01:12.980 --> 01:01:14.605 align:center
Professor Latif.
01:01:15.188 --> 01:01:16.563 align:center
Have fun.
01:01:16.646 --> 01:01:18.896 align:center
- Hey. Thank you. I, uh…
- That girl's scary.
01:01:18.980 --> 01:01:20.480 align:center
I don't love the optics of this either.
01:01:20.563 --> 01:01:22.730 align:center
Let's try to get through tonight
as quickly as possible
01:01:22.813 --> 01:01:23.938 align:center
and let's not have a lawsuit.
01:01:24.021 --> 01:01:28.896 align:center
Up first, he is captain of Masala,
the all-male Hindi a cappella team.
01:01:28.980 --> 01:01:31.605 align:center
Give it up for Gaurav Sen-Gupta.
01:01:32.855 --> 01:01:34.563 align:center
Gaurav likes capoeira,
01:01:34.646 --> 01:01:37.105 align:center
and he thinks
Timothée Chalamet is a psyop.
01:01:37.188 --> 01:01:39.563 align:center
Okay. Let's start at $20,
and I'm being generous.
01:01:40.980 --> 01:01:42.021 align:center
Sold for 20!
01:01:43.063 --> 01:01:46.730 align:center
He is into mysticism, hexes, and curses.
01:01:46.813 --> 01:01:48.938 align:center
Yes! There we go! Sold for $30!
01:01:49.021 --> 01:01:51.021 align:center
There's someone for everyone here, folks.
01:01:51.105 --> 01:01:53.438 align:center
Guys, she's pre-med. Buy the stock low.
01:01:53.521 --> 01:01:54.688 align:center
Thank you! $60!
01:01:54.771 --> 01:01:56.146 align:center
Sold for $30.
01:01:56.230 --> 01:01:57.771 align:center
Sold to the pervert in the back!
01:01:57.855 --> 01:02:00.605 align:center
Okay, we're moving.
Let's give it up for Team Agni.
01:02:00.688 --> 01:02:03.771 align:center
All right, it is a school event.
Let's stand up, please. Thank you.
01:02:03.855 --> 01:02:06.521 align:center
- Take it off, white boy!
- No, keep it on, please.
01:02:07.021 --> 01:02:09.021 align:center
And now for the men over six feet.
01:02:09.105 --> 01:02:11.063 align:center
We start with 20. 30. 35. I'll take 40.
01:02:11.146 --> 01:02:12.521 align:center
40… 70!
01:02:12.605 --> 01:02:13.771 align:center
They're into it.
01:02:13.855 --> 01:02:15.855 align:center
I know. Imagine what his mirror is like.
01:02:15.938 --> 01:02:17.146 align:center
He is really into himself.
01:02:17.230 --> 01:02:19.105 align:center
As Indians, we have a problem staring.
01:02:19.188 --> 01:02:20.605 align:center
But, uh, this is a lot.
01:02:21.563 --> 01:02:22.980 align:center
But it could be good.
01:02:23.063 --> 01:02:25.646 align:center
In the sense
that she will see you for who you are.
01:02:25.730 --> 01:02:28.938 align:center
There we go. Thank you. I haven't seen her
blink yet, but you did the right thing.
01:02:29.021 --> 01:02:31.188 align:center
Guys, you get two women
for the price of one.
01:02:31.271 --> 01:02:33.188 align:center
Don't think… Scratch that.
01:02:33.271 --> 01:02:34.355 align:center
320! 320!
01:02:34.438 --> 01:02:36.355 align:center
- 340! 340!
- Yeah!
01:02:36.438 --> 01:02:38.396 align:center
360 up here.
01:02:38.480 --> 01:02:39.313 align:center
400!
01:02:39.896 --> 01:02:41.563 align:center
Sold for 400!
01:02:41.646 --> 01:02:43.980 align:center
- Maya, you're on deck.
- We gotta close out big.
01:02:44.063 --> 01:02:46.355 align:center
- Sorry. Okay.
- Here we go. Let's keep going.
01:02:47.105 --> 01:02:49.230 align:center
Up next, we have Maya Krishnaraj.
01:02:53.271 --> 01:02:54.646 align:center
- Maya.
- Huh?
01:02:55.646 --> 01:02:57.896 align:center
Maya Krishnaraj, you guys.
01:02:58.480 --> 01:03:01.563 align:center
Uh, Maya is a freshman comp sci major,
01:03:01.646 --> 01:03:05.105 align:center
and her favorite snack
is Flamin' Hot Cheetos.
01:03:05.188 --> 01:03:06.271 align:center
So…
01:03:07.313 --> 01:03:09.063 align:center
Let's start at $20.
01:03:09.146 --> 01:03:10.396 align:center
Um… Sorry, sorry.
01:03:10.480 --> 01:03:11.563 align:center
Uh, sorry.
01:03:11.646 --> 01:03:15.188 align:center
One sec. Can… can I just say real quick,
like, real quick…
01:03:15.271 --> 01:03:16.355 align:center
Um…
01:03:17.271 --> 01:03:20.355 align:center
This is weird, right?
01:03:20.438 --> 01:03:22.230 align:center
Like, what are we doing?
01:03:22.313 --> 01:03:26.021 align:center
I thought date auctions were canceled,
like with plantation weddings and stuff.
01:03:26.105 --> 01:03:30.063 align:center
Uh… so, you know, I… I just think
we should maybe do a little soul-searching
01:03:30.146 --> 01:03:31.396 align:center
and ask ourselves,
01:03:31.896 --> 01:03:33.688 align:center
why are we so okay with this?
01:03:34.271 --> 01:03:37.313 align:center
Are we not a part of the problem?
01:03:37.396 --> 01:03:38.563 align:center
Is this
01:03:39.646 --> 01:03:42.230 align:center
our plantation?
01:03:44.521 --> 01:03:49.021 align:center
- Yeah.
- Thank you so much, Maya, for that… poem.
01:03:49.521 --> 01:03:53.563 align:center
Let's start at $20. $20.
01:03:53.646 --> 01:03:57.063 align:center
The princess has arrived!
01:03:57.605 --> 01:03:58.938 align:center
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
01:03:59.021 --> 01:04:01.063 align:center
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
01:04:01.146 --> 01:04:03.855 align:center
Okay, why don't you do this
every time I come into a room?
01:04:03.938 --> 01:04:09.688 align:center
'Cause you just brought our total haul
to $3,020! We're going to Berkeley!
01:04:12.230 --> 01:04:14.646 align:center
We're gonna give
the University of Spoiled Children
01:04:14.730 --> 01:04:16.355 align:center
something they should've gotten
growing up.
01:04:16.438 --> 01:04:19.521 align:center
- A proper ass-whoopin'!
- Aaah!
01:04:19.605 --> 01:04:21.021 align:center
Whoo!
01:04:21.855 --> 01:04:23.230 align:center
Fifteen. Let's do fif--
01:04:23.313 --> 01:04:26.396 align:center
- Okay, can we please just stop? Please.
- Guys, repeat after me.
01:04:26.480 --> 01:04:29.438 align:center
"I bid $50 for a date with Maya."
01:04:29.521 --> 01:04:31.271 align:center
Eww!
01:04:31.355 --> 01:04:33.313 align:center
Okay. That's not what I meant.
01:04:33.396 --> 01:04:36.438 align:center
That is something I would say
if I weren't her teacher.
01:04:36.521 --> 01:04:39.188 align:center
You can bid on her because she's an adult.
01:04:39.271 --> 01:04:41.896 align:center
In the sense that she's barely… legal.
01:04:41.980 --> 01:04:43.855 align:center
- Uh, scratch that.
- Jesus Christ.
01:04:43.938 --> 01:04:45.771 align:center
Someone please bid, for the love of God.
01:04:45.855 --> 01:04:47.021 align:center
A thousand dollars.
01:04:49.146 --> 01:04:50.521 align:center
I'm sorry, how much?
01:04:52.063 --> 01:04:54.063 align:center
A thousand… dollars.
01:04:54.146 --> 01:04:56.813 align:center
A thousand dollars,
going once, going twice…
01:04:56.896 --> 01:04:59.313 align:center
Maya, sold for a thousand dollars.
01:04:59.396 --> 01:05:00.396 align:center
Uh…
01:05:00.480 --> 01:05:03.605 align:center
Whatever you have recorded
on your phone, please just delete.
01:05:08.938 --> 01:05:11.188 align:center
Maya! Maya.
01:05:16.063 --> 01:05:17.230 align:center
I thought you had work.
01:05:18.021 --> 01:05:19.438 align:center
Yeah, I got off early.
01:05:19.521 --> 01:05:22.146 align:center
It was either date auction
or Frisbee on the quad.
01:05:22.771 --> 01:05:26.230 align:center
But my Frisbee privileges
haven't been reinstated yet, so…
01:05:26.313 --> 01:05:28.730 align:center
Okay, well, you didn't have to drop
a thousand dollars.
01:05:28.813 --> 01:05:31.896 align:center
I don't know what to tell you.
It was more fun than I thought, you know?
01:05:32.396 --> 01:05:33.688 align:center
Right. Then you know what?
01:05:33.771 --> 01:05:35.771 align:center
You can just go back in there.
Get a refund.
01:05:35.855 --> 01:05:37.980 align:center
I'm pretty sure they said
all transactions are final.
01:05:38.730 --> 01:05:39.980 align:center
Well, then, you know what?
01:05:41.396 --> 01:05:43.521 align:center
I think you got a pretty raw deal.
01:05:45.896 --> 01:05:47.438 align:center
Yeah, well, you know what I think?
01:05:50.480 --> 01:05:53.063 align:center
I think you are an absolute steal.
01:06:04.396 --> 01:06:05.730 align:center
So, how about that date?
01:06:06.563 --> 01:06:08.021 align:center
Like… like, now?
01:06:08.105 --> 01:06:10.688 align:center
- I'm sorry, did you wanna go back inside?
- No. I just…
01:06:10.771 --> 01:06:13.855 align:center
Don't let me forget. I have to do
a comp sci quiz before midnight.
01:06:13.938 --> 01:06:16.938 align:center
Oh, I was actually gonna suggest that
as our date night activity.
01:06:17.938 --> 01:06:20.146 align:center
- Oh, were you really, huh?
- Mm-hmm.
01:06:21.480 --> 01:06:22.980 align:center
Who knew Minions had money?
01:06:23.438 --> 01:06:25.021 align:center
It's a collective fund.
01:06:25.105 --> 01:06:26.688 align:center
We're unionized.
01:06:27.813 --> 01:06:30.146 align:center
Okay, I clearly need another drink.
01:06:30.230 --> 01:06:32.521 align:center
Well, you're in luck,
'cause I owe you one.
01:06:32.605 --> 01:06:33.605 align:center
For what?
01:06:34.188 --> 01:06:37.938 align:center
For losing our bet.
I gotta give Maya credit for showing up.
01:06:39.146 --> 01:06:40.730 align:center
- Oh crap.
- What?
01:06:40.813 --> 01:06:42.396 align:center
- Crap!
- What?
01:06:42.480 --> 01:06:45.730 align:center
- Crap! Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap!
- Anjali?
01:06:56.730 --> 01:06:57.730 align:center
Maya.
01:06:59.230 --> 01:07:01.105 align:center
Maya! Hey!
01:07:02.646 --> 01:07:03.646 align:center
What's up?
01:07:05.396 --> 01:07:06.646 align:center
Uh, I saved you a seat.
01:07:06.730 --> 01:07:09.646 align:center
Oh, I came late, so sat up front.
01:07:09.730 --> 01:07:12.563 align:center
Yeah. You got home pretty late last night.
01:07:12.646 --> 01:07:13.646 align:center
Yeah.
01:07:14.938 --> 01:07:16.896 align:center
I… I was just worried, is all.
01:07:17.521 --> 01:07:19.605 align:center
It's all good. I gotta run.
01:07:21.396 --> 01:07:24.896 align:center
Maya! Okay, Maya. Maya,
I am so, so sorry about the date auction.
01:07:24.980 --> 01:07:27.771 align:center
- I don't know what happened.
- You bailed on me. Not complicated.
01:07:27.855 --> 01:07:30.480 align:center
No, no, no, I was planning on coming back,
but everyone kept going--
01:07:30.563 --> 01:07:32.063 align:center
- I just--
- You promised to be my safety.
01:07:32.146 --> 01:07:35.771 align:center
- But got smashed with your friend group.
- Maya, I'm sorry! I know, I'm sorry, okay?
01:07:36.563 --> 01:07:37.730 align:center
Uh…
01:07:37.813 --> 01:07:39.521 align:center
Anj? Hey, hey. What's wrong?
01:07:43.855 --> 01:07:46.271 align:center
I don't wanna make this about me.
I'm sorry.
01:07:51.105 --> 01:07:53.771 align:center
Hey, hey, it's okay. It's okay.
Come on. It's okay.
01:07:57.771 --> 01:08:01.188 align:center
I don't understand how this happened.
I aced this week's homework.
01:08:01.271 --> 01:08:03.688 align:center
You did my quiz,
and then I wake up to this email.
01:08:05.480 --> 01:08:08.646 align:center
No, yeah, totally.
I mean, it has to be some kind of mix-up.
01:08:08.730 --> 01:08:09.980 align:center
- Sure.
- Right? It has to be.
01:08:10.063 --> 01:08:12.521 align:center
We just gotta fix it
before my mom finds out.
01:08:20.980 --> 01:08:25.146 align:center
When your dad left,
everybody in the family blamed me.
01:08:25.230 --> 01:08:28.105 align:center
I was too intense, too controlling.
01:08:28.188 --> 01:08:29.521 align:center
I drove him away.
01:08:30.938 --> 01:08:33.771 align:center
The world is not forgiving to women.
01:08:33.855 --> 01:08:37.230 align:center
It judges us on how we look, how we talk,
01:08:37.313 --> 01:08:39.146 align:center
how ambitious we are.
01:08:39.230 --> 01:08:45.730 align:center
The only thing that allows you
to not give a shit what anyone thinks
01:08:46.563 --> 01:08:47.855 align:center
is your degree.
01:08:47.938 --> 01:08:49.688 align:center
It's your leverage.
01:08:51.813 --> 01:08:53.271 align:center
And I won't let you squander it.
01:08:56.146 --> 01:08:58.355 align:center
You have until the end of the quarter.
01:08:58.438 --> 01:08:59.855 align:center
And if you don't get your grades up,
01:08:59.938 --> 01:09:02.480 align:center
you're gonna be finishing the year
at community college.
01:09:07.105 --> 01:09:10.563 align:center
- I'm so sorry.
- Mm-mm. It's not your fault.
01:09:11.271 --> 01:09:12.980 align:center
I think it might be my fault.
01:09:13.855 --> 01:09:14.730 align:center
Hmm?
01:09:15.396 --> 01:09:16.813 align:center
I forgot to do your quiz.
01:09:17.896 --> 01:09:21.646 align:center
I am so sorry.
It was a complete accident, I swear.
01:09:22.146 --> 01:09:26.813 align:center
It's just… Arjun wanted to hang out late,
and I lost track of time.
01:09:27.396 --> 01:09:29.771 align:center
Anj, look. Seriously, I am so sorry.
01:09:29.855 --> 01:09:30.855 align:center
Mmm.
01:09:34.563 --> 01:09:35.563 align:center
It's okay.
01:09:37.521 --> 01:09:38.521 align:center
It's okay.
01:09:39.355 --> 01:09:41.855 align:center
Uh… Hey, uh, where… where are you going?
01:09:41.938 --> 01:09:42.855 align:center
I just…
01:09:43.938 --> 01:09:45.146 align:center
I just need some air.
01:09:51.605 --> 01:09:53.146 align:center
Breathe out, deep breath.
01:09:53.230 --> 01:09:55.021 align:center
- This will center you.
- This is so good.
01:09:55.105 --> 01:09:56.813 align:center
You've been using it for a while now.
01:09:56.896 --> 01:09:59.688 align:center
Okay, a little bit higher. To the left.
01:09:59.771 --> 01:10:01.396 align:center
All right, listen up, everyone.
01:10:02.730 --> 01:10:04.813 align:center
As you may have noticed,
Anjali is not here,
01:10:04.896 --> 01:10:06.855 align:center
and she won't be for the rest of the year.
01:10:07.355 --> 01:10:08.688 align:center
Because she quit.
01:10:08.771 --> 01:10:10.980 align:center
- Oh my God.
- It's Lyme disease, isn't it?
01:10:11.063 --> 01:10:12.188 align:center
Academic probation.
01:10:13.396 --> 01:10:15.355 align:center
That's real?
01:10:15.438 --> 01:10:18.646 align:center
Obviously, this puts us in a tough spot
with Berkeley a few weeks out.
01:10:18.730 --> 01:10:20.105 align:center
Who's gonna fill in?
01:10:20.188 --> 01:10:21.480 align:center
According to the rules,
01:10:21.563 --> 01:10:24.396 align:center
the person who came in second for lead
gets bumped up.
01:10:24.480 --> 01:10:27.438 align:center
In our case, that person is Maya.
01:10:30.855 --> 01:10:32.938 align:center
Six, seven, eight!
01:10:33.021 --> 01:10:35.730 align:center
One and two and three and four!
01:10:35.813 --> 01:10:37.771 align:center
Ronak, work that entrance!
01:10:37.855 --> 01:10:41.605 align:center
- Little present for holdin' on so long
- …where you change M…
01:10:41.688 --> 01:10:43.563 align:center
I could not bear the thought of it
01:10:43.646 --> 01:10:45.646 align:center
- Two days ago…
- …you would calculate…
01:10:45.730 --> 01:10:48.396 align:center
- Five, six, seven, eight!
- Don't think I would forgive myself
01:10:48.480 --> 01:10:51.146 align:center
…and then calculate F
based on this new value.
01:10:52.396 --> 01:10:54.521 align:center
Dimple, be on time for once, yeah?
01:10:57.105 --> 01:10:59.146 align:center
Bro, this is not my job.
This is Harry's job.
01:10:59.230 --> 01:11:01.605 align:center
- Shut up, Vishal. I got it.
- You sure, bro?
01:11:01.688 --> 01:11:03.688 align:center
- Bro, your legs are shivering.
- Oh my God.
01:11:03.771 --> 01:11:05.563 align:center
Go in. You know what, go in…
01:11:05.646 --> 01:11:08.813 align:center
Man, I tried to find someone
to sub in for my shift, but…
01:11:08.896 --> 01:11:10.146 align:center
- Dude. Stop.
- No.
01:11:10.230 --> 01:11:11.230 align:center
You're all good.
01:11:11.855 --> 01:11:15.646 align:center
Yeah, but you're finally lead.
I wanna see you on stage doin' your thang.
01:11:15.730 --> 01:11:18.230 align:center
Mm. Well, if you wanna see me
"doin' my thang,"
01:11:18.313 --> 01:11:20.146 align:center
then you can watch the live stream.
01:11:20.646 --> 01:11:22.521 align:center
No. No, no. That made me
sound like a cam girl.
01:11:22.605 --> 01:11:26.021 align:center
You know what?
It did, but I would watch it anyway.
01:11:27.563 --> 01:11:28.896 align:center
Okay, now Harry shows up.
01:11:28.980 --> 01:11:30.105 align:center
- When we're almost done.
- Go!
01:11:30.188 --> 01:11:32.563 align:center
- Think fast.
- Says the guy who isn't under…
01:11:32.646 --> 01:11:34.480 align:center
- Um…
- The reason we were late…
01:11:34.563 --> 01:11:37.313 align:center
I'm not really good at the PDA thing.
01:11:38.313 --> 01:11:39.605 align:center
Cool. Yeah.
01:11:39.688 --> 01:11:41.021 align:center
- But…
- It's fine.
01:11:41.521 --> 01:11:43.938 align:center
- I will call you when I get there?
- Yes.
01:11:44.438 --> 01:11:45.563 align:center
- All right.
- Okay.
01:11:46.063 --> 01:11:48.271 align:center
- Kick some ass at Berkeley.
- Will do.
01:11:48.355 --> 01:11:49.813 align:center
…this right now…
01:11:49.896 --> 01:11:50.771 align:center
- Hey!
- Hey!
01:11:51.396 --> 01:11:52.521 align:center
- Oh.
- Oh!
01:11:54.980 --> 01:11:55.855 align:center
- Here you go.
- Oh.
01:11:55.938 --> 01:11:58.021 align:center
Dude, you did not have
to get it dry-cleaned. Thanks!
01:11:58.105 --> 01:11:59.730 align:center
- Are you kidding? It was gross.
- Rotate.
01:11:59.813 --> 01:12:01.896 align:center
Well, I will see you when I get back.
01:12:01.980 --> 01:12:04.021 align:center
- It's a square. Doesn't matter.
- Break a leg.
01:12:04.105 --> 01:12:05.896 align:center
- Only one direction it can go.
- Thanks.
01:12:05.980 --> 01:12:08.146 align:center
- Come out.
- Is that everything?
01:12:08.230 --> 01:12:09.855 align:center
- One more thing.
- What?
01:12:09.938 --> 01:12:10.771 align:center
Wait.
01:12:10.855 --> 01:12:12.188 align:center
Yo, what the fuck?
01:12:12.271 --> 01:12:13.271 align:center
Idiot.
01:12:13.896 --> 01:12:15.105 align:center
See ya!
01:12:15.188 --> 01:12:16.896 align:center
Open the door. This is trafficking!
01:12:34.063 --> 01:12:36.855 align:center
UCLA brought it this time!
01:12:36.938 --> 01:12:38.438 align:center
Let's go!
01:12:41.313 --> 01:12:42.980 align:center
- Hey!
- Hey!
01:12:43.605 --> 01:12:45.646 align:center
It wasn't our best,
but should be good enough to place
01:12:45.730 --> 01:12:47.146 align:center
based off of the teams we've seen.
01:12:47.771 --> 01:12:51.396 align:center
Come on, that was more than good enough!
That was fantastic!
01:12:51.480 --> 01:12:53.605 align:center
Let's go! Yeah!
01:12:53.688 --> 01:12:56.021 align:center
Good job, guys. Good job.
01:12:56.105 --> 01:12:57.688 align:center
UCLA! UCLA!
01:12:57.771 --> 01:13:00.730 align:center
Okay, y'all. We got one final act.
01:13:00.813 --> 01:13:04.813 align:center
They've got Wranglers on their booty
and spurs on their jutti.
01:13:04.896 --> 01:13:07.646 align:center
Make some noise for UT Dallas!
01:13:09.646 --> 01:13:12.771 align:center
Praise the Lord
For Southern women, crispy chicken
01:13:12.855 --> 01:13:15.271 align:center
Praise the Lord for East Atlanta
01:13:15.355 --> 01:13:17.230 align:center
Country Grammar and my nana
01:13:17.313 --> 01:13:19.563 align:center
I might turn up on Saturday
01:13:19.646 --> 01:13:21.355 align:center
But first thing Sunday morn'
01:13:21.438 --> 01:13:23.105 align:center
I praise the Lord
01:13:23.938 --> 01:13:28.105 align:center
Praise the Lord for Southern women
Hemi engines, crispy chicken
01:13:29.105 --> 01:13:30.896 align:center
I might turn up on Saturday
01:13:30.980 --> 01:13:32.771 align:center
But first thing Sunday morn'
01:13:32.855 --> 01:13:34.438 align:center
I praise the Lord
01:13:44.271 --> 01:13:46.313 align:center
Holy shit, these guys are good.
01:13:46.396 --> 01:13:47.688 align:center
And kind of hot.
01:13:47.771 --> 01:13:49.771 align:center
Their smoke too tough,
their swag too different.
01:13:49.855 --> 01:13:52.771 align:center
Yeah, only 'cause they got their swag
from somebody else.
01:13:52.855 --> 01:13:54.105 align:center
What are you talking about?
01:13:54.188 --> 01:13:57.271 align:center
They totally ripped this choreo from
Quick Style. We gotta say something.
01:13:57.355 --> 01:13:58.480 align:center
You should file a complaint!
01:13:58.563 --> 01:14:01.396 align:center
Maya, I'm not in the mood
for one of your crusades, okay?
01:14:01.480 --> 01:14:03.355 align:center
Dude, you're the team captain.
01:14:03.438 --> 01:14:05.646 align:center
You're the only one who can do it,
so just talk--
01:14:05.730 --> 01:14:07.063 align:center
Maya, just drop it.
01:14:10.063 --> 01:14:11.105 align:center
Okay.
01:14:13.813 --> 01:14:16.480 align:center
UCLA's season is over!
01:14:16.563 --> 01:14:19.063 align:center
They ended up taking third place!
Let's go!
01:14:19.146 --> 01:14:21.230 align:center
But nationally, they're 11th,
01:14:21.313 --> 01:14:24.605 align:center
just shy of the top ten,
which means, despite a killer show,
01:14:24.688 --> 01:14:28.230 align:center
UCLA will not be going
to Best of the Best.
01:14:28.313 --> 01:14:30.146 align:center
Second place went to the Dallas Bandits,
01:14:30.230 --> 01:14:32.230 align:center
I'm here with the fools
who took first place.
01:14:32.313 --> 01:14:34.480 align:center
No surprise, it is USC Tamasha!
01:14:34.563 --> 01:14:36.188 align:center
- How do you feel?
- Amazing.
01:14:36.271 --> 01:14:39.063 align:center
But first, I wanna say
none of this would have been possible
01:14:39.146 --> 01:14:40.396 align:center
without my friends at the Gap.
01:14:40.480 --> 01:14:42.646 align:center
Get 10% off with the promo code Selena.
01:14:42.730 --> 01:14:45.688 align:center
S-E-L-E-N-A.
01:14:46.896 --> 01:14:48.271 align:center
Everybody move
01:14:49.146 --> 01:14:50.438 align:center
Everybody
01:14:51.521 --> 01:14:52.938 align:center
Everybody move
01:14:53.896 --> 01:14:55.230 align:center
Everybody…
01:15:02.021 --> 01:15:03.605 align:center
Johnnie Walker Black.
01:15:03.688 --> 01:15:07.105 align:center
The only sensible drink
for a sad Indian man.
01:15:07.188 --> 01:15:08.521 align:center
What's up? Shots!
01:15:09.688 --> 01:15:10.646 align:center
What's going on?
01:15:10.730 --> 01:15:13.438 align:center
We still got third!
We should be celebrating!
01:15:13.521 --> 01:15:15.563 align:center
- Maya, come here!
- Guys.
01:15:15.646 --> 01:15:17.105 align:center
Scoresheet from tonight.
01:15:17.188 --> 01:15:20.521 align:center
I need to kill a part of my brain
to make this make sense.
01:15:20.605 --> 01:15:23.313 align:center
Dallas got a nine for their choreo,
01:15:23.396 --> 01:15:24.688 align:center
that they stole!
01:15:24.771 --> 01:15:27.855 align:center
And we got, what, a seven?
How does that make any sense?
01:15:27.938 --> 01:15:29.271 align:center
I mean, I crushed my solo.
01:15:29.355 --> 01:15:31.980 align:center
Yeah, your solo hit,
but the team also killed it.
01:15:32.063 --> 01:15:33.438 align:center
We got a nine on formations.
01:15:33.521 --> 01:15:36.188 align:center
Totally. You and Harry finally hit
that center formation.
01:15:36.271 --> 01:15:38.771 align:center
You missed it all week
but you showed up when it mattered.
01:15:38.855 --> 01:15:39.855 align:center
Okay, thanks.
01:15:39.938 --> 01:15:43.063 align:center
And, Sumi, your face, so much better.
01:15:43.146 --> 01:15:46.730 align:center
Usually, you look like you're trying
to pass a kidney stone, but it was good.
01:15:46.813 --> 01:15:48.938 align:center
- It was good.
- You're too kind.
01:15:49.021 --> 01:15:52.063 align:center
Okay, let's hit the dance floor.
I'm done feeling like a loser.
01:15:52.146 --> 01:15:54.730 align:center
Guys, guys, come on. Don't be butt-hurt.
01:15:55.438 --> 01:15:57.813 align:center
Guys! Harry, you did it.
01:15:57.896 --> 01:15:58.855 align:center
Maya.
01:16:01.896 --> 01:16:04.938 align:center
Noice. That's some top-notch leadership.
01:16:06.771 --> 01:16:09.313 align:center
- I was just being real.
- Oh, we're being real now?
01:16:10.230 --> 01:16:13.855 align:center
All right, let's be real.
This was my last chance to beat USC.
01:16:14.938 --> 01:16:17.646 align:center
- And you blew it for me.
- Dude, what the hell are you smoking?
01:16:18.355 --> 01:16:20.646 align:center
You're the reason
why we fell so far in the rankings.
01:16:20.730 --> 01:16:22.271 align:center
Really?
01:16:22.355 --> 01:16:25.105 align:center
'Cause we would have gotten first
in San Diego
01:16:25.188 --> 01:16:28.521 align:center
if you had just let me
turn on the doli carriage, but no.
01:16:28.605 --> 01:16:31.771 align:center
No. It's always your way or no way at all.
01:16:31.855 --> 01:16:35.521 align:center
That is so rich coming from the person
whose only setting is open hostility.
01:16:35.605 --> 01:16:37.855 align:center
'Cause I don't fall in line
like your kiss-ass groupies?
01:16:37.938 --> 01:16:40.938 align:center
No. 'Cause you don't even try
to be a team player, Maya.
01:16:41.563 --> 01:16:42.563 align:center
Mmm.
01:16:43.146 --> 01:16:44.146 align:center
Yeah.
01:16:44.980 --> 01:16:46.438 align:center
Nah. See,
01:16:46.938 --> 01:16:51.271 align:center
what you actually said
was that I don't have lead energy.
01:16:52.313 --> 01:16:55.980 align:center
And that I'm impossible…
01:16:56.646 --> 01:16:57.938 align:center
to control.
01:17:01.105 --> 01:17:03.188 align:center
Yo! No way, no way!
01:17:03.271 --> 01:17:06.396 align:center
Dallas has been disqualified
for plagiarism. They're out. We're in.
01:17:06.480 --> 01:17:07.980 align:center
- What?
- Can't be real.
01:17:08.063 --> 01:17:09.730 align:center
- Wait, what?
- We got in!
01:17:09.813 --> 01:17:12.063 align:center
Dallas got disqualified!
01:17:13.605 --> 01:17:15.438 align:center
Oh my God!
01:17:17.146 --> 01:17:19.646 align:center
You reported them.
You actually listened to me.
01:17:19.730 --> 01:17:22.771 align:center
I didn't think it would even work!
But you were right!
01:17:22.855 --> 01:17:25.355 align:center
- You were right!
- Guys!
01:17:26.146 --> 01:17:28.355 align:center
We just got into Best of the Best!
01:17:30.771 --> 01:17:34.813 align:center
Leave it with delusions
There's one more appealing
01:17:34.896 --> 01:17:37.313 align:center
One that could save us both
01:17:37.396 --> 01:17:42.146 align:center
Strangers can't do this
Turn your pain into music
01:17:42.230 --> 01:17:46.938 align:center
I'm your solution
One that could save us both…
01:17:47.021 --> 01:17:48.063 align:center
I'm sorry.
01:17:49.646 --> 01:17:51.688 align:center
I should've never taken the lead from you.
01:17:52.355 --> 01:17:55.313 align:center
We… we wouldn't be here without you.
01:18:10.771 --> 01:18:13.896 align:center
UCLA is going to Best of the Best!
01:18:13.980 --> 01:18:15.188 align:center
Whoo!
01:18:15.271 --> 01:18:17.938 align:center
They spent the night getting shwasted.
01:18:18.021 --> 01:18:21.355 align:center
But I was lucky enough
to get some one-on-one time
01:18:21.438 --> 01:18:23.396 align:center
with Agni's newest badass, Maya,
01:18:23.480 --> 01:18:25.521 align:center
formerly known as Drone Strike,
01:18:25.605 --> 01:18:27.646 align:center
and, girl, you've come a long way.
01:18:27.730 --> 01:18:29.938 align:center
That is right.
Head bitch in charge over here.
01:18:30.021 --> 01:18:33.563 align:center
- And let's just say it's about time.
- You just became lead, right?
01:18:33.646 --> 01:18:35.938 align:center
There was that other girl, Anjali.
Super cute, by the way.
01:18:36.021 --> 01:18:37.730 align:center
But she had that whole prop mishap.
01:18:37.813 --> 01:18:40.313 align:center
A lotta followers wanna know,
is that why you replaced her, or…
01:18:40.396 --> 01:18:42.480 align:center
No, she's on academic probation.
01:18:42.980 --> 01:18:46.855 align:center
Which is not to say she's dumb.
01:18:46.938 --> 01:18:49.396 align:center
She's super smart. It's just,
you know, you get a bad quarter.
01:18:49.480 --> 01:18:51.605 align:center
For sure, yeah.
Well, Horny4Dance wants to know,
01:18:51.688 --> 01:18:54.355 align:center
"Will Anjali be back
for the championship? She's so hot."
01:18:54.438 --> 01:18:57.646 align:center
Okay, yo, Horny4Dance,
stop being a horndog. Okay?
01:18:57.730 --> 01:19:00.396 align:center
It's not a beauty contest.
It's about talent.
01:19:01.813 --> 01:19:03.855 align:center
I know what you need
01:19:03.938 --> 01:19:06.271 align:center
You talk in your sleep…
01:19:07.896 --> 01:19:09.605 align:center
- Hey.
- Hey!
01:19:10.105 --> 01:19:12.688 align:center
What are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be celebrating?
01:19:12.771 --> 01:19:17.230 align:center
Oh, I did enough of that last night.
I just came by to drop off some tools.
01:19:18.563 --> 01:19:19.563 align:center
Thanks.
01:19:21.980 --> 01:19:22.855 align:center
Hey.
01:19:23.438 --> 01:19:25.105 align:center
Hey! What's up?
01:19:27.230 --> 01:19:28.563 align:center
I don't know what this is.
01:19:28.646 --> 01:19:32.188 align:center
You're saying you wanna hang,
but then you're always pulling away.
01:19:32.855 --> 01:19:34.480 align:center
And then you're all over Ronak.
01:19:35.271 --> 01:19:36.688 align:center
What are you talking about?
01:19:36.771 --> 01:19:38.521 align:center
I saw the video, Maya.
01:19:39.313 --> 01:19:40.605 align:center
What video?
01:19:41.771 --> 01:19:44.355 align:center
The one of you and Ronak… dancing.
01:19:44.855 --> 01:19:46.188 align:center
All over my socials.
01:19:46.271 --> 01:19:48.438 align:center
But you're not on socials.
01:19:48.521 --> 01:19:50.896 align:center
I used my old iPhone
to live stream your competition.
01:19:50.980 --> 01:19:54.480 align:center
Okay, listen. Everyone else was
also there. Ronak actually said sorry.
01:19:54.563 --> 01:19:55.896 align:center
He shits on you all year.
01:19:56.605 --> 01:19:58.563 align:center
Kicks you off the fricking team, and what?
01:19:58.646 --> 01:20:00.563 align:center
One apology
and now you're his biggest fan?
01:20:01.146 --> 01:20:02.438 align:center
- Great.
- Hey, Arjun.
01:20:02.521 --> 01:20:06.021 align:center
Okay, just listen.
Okay, look. Ronak means nothing to me.
01:20:06.105 --> 01:20:08.230 align:center
Yeah, but his approval
means everything to you.
01:20:08.313 --> 01:20:10.771 align:center
You care so much
about what everybody else thinks,
01:20:10.855 --> 01:20:12.855 align:center
except for the people
that actually care about you.
01:20:12.938 --> 01:20:14.938 align:center
So, you know what?
Good luck with Best of the Best.
01:20:15.021 --> 01:20:16.688 align:center
But I gotta get back to work.
01:20:24.313 --> 01:20:26.980 align:center
What's up? This is Jelly Cat!
Leave a message.
01:20:29.563 --> 01:20:30.396 align:center
Anj?
01:20:41.146 --> 01:20:42.646 align:center
That's it.
01:20:42.730 --> 01:20:44.438 align:center
That's it. I need to see you turn.
01:20:44.521 --> 01:20:47.646 align:center
Was this in the dorm room
that you guys shared before you put it on?
01:20:47.730 --> 01:20:51.021 align:center
Honestly, you should take off
anything that touched her, that she wore.
01:20:51.105 --> 01:20:53.938 align:center
Let's just cleanse the energy of Maya.
You know?
01:20:54.021 --> 01:20:55.688 align:center
You want me to take my clothes off?
01:20:55.771 --> 01:20:58.021 align:center
Anj? You there?
01:20:58.646 --> 01:21:00.105 align:center
What do you want, Maya?
01:21:00.688 --> 01:21:03.021 align:center
- I just wanna talk to Anjali.
- She's not here.
01:21:03.105 --> 01:21:05.646 align:center
- She doesn't wanna talk to you!
- Shut up, Deeps!
01:21:05.730 --> 01:21:06.646 align:center
Sorry.
01:21:06.730 --> 01:21:10.605 align:center
Please, Anj. Okay? I just wanna talk.
Okay? Just let me explain.
01:21:10.688 --> 01:21:13.813 align:center
I don't need you to explain shit to me.
I can understand a video.
01:21:13.896 --> 01:21:15.646 align:center
Nothing happened between Ronak and me.
01:21:15.730 --> 01:21:18.480 align:center
Oh, please!
That is so not what I'm mad about!
01:21:18.563 --> 01:21:21.188 align:center
Is it the interview? Anj, I'm sorry, okay?
01:21:21.271 --> 01:21:24.521 align:center
She hit me with a weird question,
and I was just trying to defend you.
01:21:24.605 --> 01:21:28.146 align:center
You basically said I'm an idiot
who can't dance to the entire world.
01:21:28.230 --> 01:21:29.438 align:center
That's not what I said.
01:21:29.521 --> 01:21:31.355 align:center
God, you always do this!
01:21:31.438 --> 01:21:34.605 align:center
You screw things up, and I'm the one
that gets left holding the bag!
01:21:35.105 --> 01:21:37.980 align:center
Okay, so I'm the only one
who's making mistakes?
01:21:38.063 --> 01:21:41.771 align:center
You haven't left me hanging?
You haven't had my back all year!
01:21:42.355 --> 01:21:43.313 align:center
All year?
01:21:43.396 --> 01:21:46.313 align:center
Ever since you got lead,
you have ditched me for Ronak
01:21:46.396 --> 01:21:48.313 align:center
and Thing One and Thing Dumb over here.
01:21:48.396 --> 01:21:49.605 align:center
- What the hell?
- Whoa!
01:21:49.688 --> 01:21:52.271 align:center
Of course,
there's always someone else to blame!
01:21:52.355 --> 01:21:54.355 align:center
You never, ever take accountability!
01:21:54.438 --> 01:21:57.355 align:center
Enlighten me, Anj.
What have I not taken accountability for?
01:21:57.438 --> 01:21:59.480 align:center
How about stealing lead from me?
01:22:01.146 --> 01:22:02.480 align:center
What are you talking about?
01:22:02.563 --> 01:22:05.688 align:center
Yeah, sure,
you accidentally forgot to do my quiz,
01:22:05.771 --> 01:22:07.563 align:center
which coincidentally made you lead.
01:22:07.646 --> 01:22:10.313 align:center
I mean, how stupid do you think I am?
01:22:11.230 --> 01:22:12.938 align:center
I would never do that to you.
01:22:13.021 --> 01:22:14.605 align:center
That's what I thought.
01:22:15.396 --> 01:22:19.396 align:center
I thought
my best friend would always have my back.
01:22:20.521 --> 01:22:22.313 align:center
Till I saw you all over Ronak.
01:22:22.396 --> 01:22:24.438 align:center
Oh my God, I knew
you were still pissed about that!
01:22:24.521 --> 01:22:25.521 align:center
I didn't love it!
01:22:25.605 --> 01:22:28.188 align:center
I'm telling you we were all just dancing.
We were drunk.
01:22:28.271 --> 01:22:30.813 align:center
We were celebrating, okay?
It meant nothing!
01:22:30.896 --> 01:22:33.521 align:center
Obviously,
Ronak would never have done that sober!
01:22:35.521 --> 01:22:38.355 align:center
Right. Because how could someone like him
01:22:38.438 --> 01:22:41.146 align:center
ever dance with someone like me
in the right state of mind?
01:22:41.230 --> 01:22:44.980 align:center
Oh my God, that is so not what I said!
Don't turn this into a pity party
01:22:45.063 --> 01:22:48.188 align:center
to distract from the fact you just
can't handle that I won lead over you.
01:22:48.271 --> 01:22:50.730 align:center
You were never supposed to be lead
in the first place!
01:22:51.480 --> 01:22:54.813 align:center
- What are you talking about?
- Why don't you ask your best friends?
01:22:56.146 --> 01:22:57.313 align:center
Maya, don't.
01:22:57.396 --> 01:22:59.021 align:center
I was never gonna tell you,
01:22:59.730 --> 01:23:01.813 align:center
but I got more votes than you.
01:23:02.396 --> 01:23:05.730 align:center
But they made you lead
because you have more lead energy.
01:23:06.313 --> 01:23:08.438 align:center
Wonder what they meant by that, huh?
01:23:09.438 --> 01:23:11.563 align:center
That's why you got lead.
01:23:11.646 --> 01:23:14.396 align:center
That's why you get everything.
01:23:14.480 --> 01:23:15.938 align:center
That's not true.
01:23:18.605 --> 01:23:19.563 align:center
Is it?
01:23:20.771 --> 01:23:25.730 align:center
It is so exhausting
having to stand next to you.
01:23:25.813 --> 01:23:29.146 align:center
You are so easy to like. I'm not.
01:23:29.813 --> 01:23:33.771 align:center
I have to work so much harder
to get far less.
01:23:35.271 --> 01:23:36.896 align:center
But the worst part is,
01:23:36.980 --> 01:23:39.105 align:center
the part that really sucks,
01:23:40.855 --> 01:23:45.396 align:center
is that my own… best friend
can't see that.
01:23:48.480 --> 01:23:50.396 align:center
You were always telling me to let shit go.
01:23:51.896 --> 01:23:52.896 align:center
Okay.
01:23:54.313 --> 01:23:55.313 align:center
Fine.
01:23:56.480 --> 01:23:57.980 align:center
You can have lead,
01:23:58.063 --> 01:24:00.271 align:center
because I… quit.
01:24:02.896 --> 01:24:04.313 align:center
That's our show, everyone.
01:24:04.396 --> 01:24:06.813 align:center
Yeah? Have a great break.
01:24:16.855 --> 01:24:19.646 align:center
And I felt what you did
01:24:19.730 --> 01:24:22.271 align:center
And I heard what you said
01:24:22.355 --> 01:24:24.896 align:center
And I felt to my core
01:24:24.980 --> 01:24:30.730 align:center
But I couldn't believe
The words I read
01:24:31.771 --> 01:24:35.688 align:center
I read
01:24:36.313 --> 01:24:37.563 align:center
Ooh
01:24:37.646 --> 01:24:40.313 align:center
The force froze me in time
01:24:40.396 --> 01:24:42.980 align:center
While you cling to the past
01:24:43.063 --> 01:24:45.480 align:center
And you missed how I've changed
01:24:45.563 --> 01:24:47.563 align:center
So you could never know
01:24:47.646 --> 01:24:51.188 align:center
Who I am
01:24:52.313 --> 01:24:56.563 align:center
I am
01:24:56.646 --> 01:24:59.063 align:center
Am
01:24:59.146 --> 01:25:01.813 align:center
Did I ever know you?
01:25:01.896 --> 01:25:04.188 align:center
I can't be sure
01:25:04.271 --> 01:25:06.271 align:center
We saw a different side
01:25:06.355 --> 01:25:09.563 align:center
What a difference time shows
01:25:09.646 --> 01:25:11.980 align:center
Did I ever know you?
01:25:12.063 --> 01:25:14.855 align:center
I can't be sure
01:25:14.938 --> 01:25:17.563 align:center
Somewhere between what was
01:25:17.646 --> 01:25:21.480 align:center
And what will be
01:25:30.396 --> 01:25:32.396 align:center
Not sure they know how to play.
01:25:36.396 --> 01:25:39.271 align:center
- Get off! Aah!
- Don't you just love child labor?
01:25:39.355 --> 01:25:42.605 align:center
Smile, Maya! Smile, kanna!
01:25:45.021 --> 01:25:47.730 align:center
Like Anjali, kanna.
Try to look like her.
01:25:52.063 --> 01:25:53.521 align:center
- Oh, food's here!
- Oh!
01:25:53.605 --> 01:25:54.813 align:center
- Thank you.
- Thank you so much!
01:25:54.896 --> 01:25:57.438 align:center
You're such a beautiful girl, Anjali.
01:25:57.521 --> 01:26:00.438 align:center
Rekha, you have such a lovely little girl.
01:26:01.896 --> 01:26:02.896 align:center
What is this?
01:26:03.396 --> 01:26:05.438 align:center
What? I like it. It's cool.
01:26:05.521 --> 01:26:08.063 align:center
Tsk! My eye!
I just wanna take one good photo.
01:26:24.480 --> 01:26:25.730 align:center
And there they are!
01:26:25.813 --> 01:26:28.521 align:center
- Mom, stop!
- Oh gosh, you guys look amazing!
01:26:28.605 --> 01:26:30.605 align:center
Everybody get in the car. Come on.
01:26:30.688 --> 01:26:32.396 align:center
Why do I always have to play the man?
01:26:42.480 --> 01:26:45.063 align:center
Yo. Welcome back from break.
01:26:45.563 --> 01:26:48.063 align:center
You missed nacho night.
Do you want a nacho?
01:26:50.063 --> 01:26:51.813 align:center
- No.
- Okay. You sure?
01:26:52.313 --> 01:26:54.896 align:center
Chip to cheese ratio is… mwah! Michelin.
01:26:56.271 --> 01:26:57.563 align:center
Oh, look at that.
01:26:57.646 --> 01:27:00.563 align:center
If you're trying to get me to join back
on the team, it's not gonna happen--
01:27:00.646 --> 01:27:01.855 align:center
Why would I do that?
01:27:02.646 --> 01:27:04.105 align:center
You chose to quit.
01:27:04.188 --> 01:27:07.771 align:center
And I respect a woman's right to choose.
01:27:10.480 --> 01:27:11.646 align:center
All right, look.
01:27:12.146 --> 01:27:14.646 align:center
You guys are better off without me,
anyway. I'm a shit lead.
01:27:14.730 --> 01:27:16.771 align:center
You're not a shit lead,
you're just a shit leader,
01:27:16.855 --> 01:27:19.980 align:center
'cause you wanted lead for yourself
so you could show up some Internet trolls.
01:27:20.063 --> 01:27:22.021 align:center
No, no, no.
You don't know what it feels like
01:27:22.105 --> 01:27:24.146 align:center
to never get the respect
that you know you deserve.
01:27:24.230 --> 01:27:27.605 align:center
Dude. Be so for real.
This isn't about Anjali.
01:27:30.980 --> 01:27:32.021 align:center
It's about this.
01:27:35.063 --> 01:27:38.605 align:center
- Ha-ha. A chip on my shoulder, really?
- Yeah, it is. Okay?
01:27:38.688 --> 01:27:40.605 align:center
It's big and delicious,
and it's the truth.
01:27:40.688 --> 01:27:42.980 align:center
And you can't see it
sitting in front of your face.
01:27:43.063 --> 01:27:45.396 align:center
You won lead, remember?
01:27:46.313 --> 01:27:47.521 align:center
We voted for you.
01:27:47.605 --> 01:27:49.646 align:center
But you're so focused on being wronged
01:27:49.730 --> 01:27:52.355 align:center
that you can't even see
what's going right.
01:27:52.438 --> 01:27:57.021 align:center
We chose you because you have vision.
You have drive. You follow your gut.
01:27:57.730 --> 01:28:01.021 align:center
You trust your instincts.
You have a total inability to shut up.
01:28:01.521 --> 01:28:03.813 align:center
And we went, "Yeah, we want more of that."
01:28:05.313 --> 01:28:07.230 align:center
And now you're choosing to bail on us.
01:28:43.563 --> 01:28:45.063 align:center
From the top!
01:28:45.146 --> 01:28:47.563 align:center
- One, two, three, four.
- What are we even doing?
01:28:47.646 --> 01:28:49.646 align:center
- We won't win.
- Feel the romance.
01:28:49.730 --> 01:28:52.230 align:center
- Okay! Where are you, Harry?
- Coming, bhai!
01:28:52.313 --> 01:28:53.855 align:center
- Oh!
- Whoa!
01:28:53.938 --> 01:28:56.146 align:center
Sorry. Oh, I'm sorry, bhai.
01:28:56.230 --> 01:28:58.355 align:center
What the hell is your problem, white boy?
01:28:58.438 --> 01:29:00.813 align:center
Hey! Do not come at him like that.
01:29:02.605 --> 01:29:05.438 align:center
I'll say whatever I want to the white boy.
01:29:05.521 --> 01:29:07.855 align:center
Yo, I have had it with this fool!
01:29:07.938 --> 01:29:10.730 align:center
Call him white boy one more time,
see what happens.
01:29:10.813 --> 01:29:13.313 align:center
Stand down, bro.
I'm not trying to steal your boyfriend!
01:29:13.396 --> 01:29:15.605 align:center
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Whoa! That's not cool.
01:29:15.688 --> 01:29:16.605 align:center
Love is love.
01:29:16.688 --> 01:29:20.396 align:center
Yeah. We accept all people,
you dumb immigrant.
01:29:20.480 --> 01:29:22.271 align:center
- That's not either.
- No one is illegal.
01:29:22.355 --> 01:29:23.438 align:center
Let's refocus.
01:29:23.521 --> 01:29:25.605 align:center
What the hell is this gora
even doing on this team?
01:29:26.355 --> 01:29:28.355 align:center
- He's not even Indian!
- Oh!
01:29:28.438 --> 01:29:31.646 align:center
Harry is the most Indian dude here.
Harry, don't listen to him.
01:29:31.730 --> 01:29:33.896 align:center
Vishal's feeble mind cannot comprehend
01:29:33.980 --> 01:29:36.230 align:center
that South Asian culture
is not a static artifact,
01:29:36.313 --> 01:29:37.646 align:center
but a living palimpsest,
01:29:37.730 --> 01:29:40.396 align:center
immune to the parochial gatekeeping
of fragile men.
01:29:45.521 --> 01:29:47.355 align:center
I don't know what she said.
01:29:47.438 --> 01:29:51.355 align:center
She called you a dumbass, dumbass.
01:29:51.438 --> 01:29:54.771 align:center
Says a loser who only made the team
on his fourth try.
01:29:54.855 --> 01:29:58.105 align:center
- Put 'em up!
- Whoa! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
01:29:58.188 --> 01:30:00.313 align:center
- Whoa, whoa, whoa! No! No!
- Finally, it's happening.
01:30:00.396 --> 01:30:02.146 align:center
Violence is not the answer.
01:30:02.230 --> 01:30:03.855 align:center
Time to go night-night.
01:30:03.938 --> 01:30:05.605 align:center
What the hell is going on?
01:30:05.688 --> 01:30:08.688 align:center
My God! Sumi!
Where did you get a taser from?
01:30:08.771 --> 01:30:11.480 align:center
- I won it. Church raffle.
- What?
01:30:11.563 --> 01:30:13.396 align:center
Uh… what are you all doing?
01:30:13.480 --> 01:30:16.188 align:center
Okay, what are you doing here?
I thought you quit.
01:30:16.271 --> 01:30:17.480 align:center
I came to apologize.
01:30:21.438 --> 01:30:22.480 align:center
I've been a prick.
01:30:23.396 --> 01:30:28.521 align:center
Definitely not the easiest to work with.
And I am really sorry for bailing on you.
01:30:29.146 --> 01:30:33.146 align:center
That was a shitty,
shitty thing for me to do.
01:30:34.146 --> 01:30:35.813 align:center
But I want back on the team.
01:30:37.563 --> 01:30:39.105 align:center
If you guys will have me, of course.
01:30:46.980 --> 01:30:50.188 align:center
Okay. So, you got an idea
for a new routine?
01:30:51.188 --> 01:30:55.146 align:center
What is the plan? What is the plan? Okay.
01:30:55.980 --> 01:30:58.896 align:center
Um, first, I just wanna say I…
01:31:00.605 --> 01:31:02.980 align:center
- Anjali! Come in!
- What are you doing here?
01:31:03.063 --> 01:31:05.271 align:center
- I got off probation.
- We missed you!
01:31:05.355 --> 01:31:06.480 align:center
Thanks for coming.
01:31:09.438 --> 01:31:11.021 align:center
Uh, I just wanna say,
01:31:11.771 --> 01:31:14.938 align:center
I totally understand
why we went all-in on nostalgia.
01:31:15.021 --> 01:31:17.105 align:center
Bollywood runs on nostalgia.
01:31:17.605 --> 01:31:20.980 align:center
And skin-whitening creams,
but… mostly nostalgia.
01:31:22.021 --> 01:31:27.896 align:center
And we copy the greats because it's safe.
And memories are incredibly powerful.
01:31:28.688 --> 01:31:29.813 align:center
Even the ones
01:31:30.605 --> 01:31:31.646 align:center
we wanna forget.
01:31:32.230 --> 01:31:36.480 align:center
We have got to stop obsessing
over the things we have lost.
01:31:37.063 --> 01:31:39.896 align:center
We have to stop chasing
what was stolen from us.
01:31:42.063 --> 01:31:48.146 align:center
And start focusing on the things
that no one can take away from us.
01:31:53.355 --> 01:31:56.271 align:center
Well, then I think
the only way we pull this off
01:31:56.771 --> 01:31:58.980 align:center
is if you and Anjali are the leads.
01:31:59.063 --> 01:32:01.980 align:center
- Oh. Um…
- That's not--
01:32:02.063 --> 01:32:04.938 align:center
- I don't know if logistically that--
- No. There's no time, okay?
01:32:05.021 --> 01:32:07.646 align:center
You two are the only ones
who can pick up a routine that fast.
01:32:09.105 --> 01:32:10.646 align:center
So let's put it to a vote.
01:32:11.688 --> 01:32:14.105 align:center
All those in favor of Maya and Anjali…
01:32:23.271 --> 01:32:28.521 align:center
Hey, so just so you know, file I/O
and search engines will be on the final.
01:32:29.021 --> 01:32:30.021 align:center
That's it.
01:32:30.521 --> 01:32:31.938 align:center
Maya, Anjali, hang back.
01:32:35.771 --> 01:32:39.105 align:center
So I heard you made, uh, championships.
Congrats.
01:32:42.063 --> 01:32:44.396 align:center
Look, I don't know what's goin' on
between you two
01:32:44.480 --> 01:32:47.021 align:center
and, frankly,
I'm embarrassed that I even care.
01:32:47.105 --> 01:32:48.896 align:center
But here's what I do know.
01:32:48.980 --> 01:32:53.771 align:center
In 15 years, a grand total of no one
will be talking about the drama
01:32:54.271 --> 01:32:55.771 align:center
of collegiate Bollywood dance.
01:32:55.855 --> 01:32:58.563 align:center
Because when you have a mortgage
and back pain,
01:32:58.646 --> 01:33:01.355 align:center
all you can remember is the good times.
01:33:03.355 --> 01:33:04.980 align:center
I don't even remember our routine.
01:33:05.688 --> 01:33:08.688 align:center
But every single one of those people
was at my wedding.
01:33:09.605 --> 01:33:12.480 align:center
Except that guy.
That guy is in prison for wire fraud.
01:33:12.563 --> 01:33:14.605 align:center
Look, whatever it is, just fix it.
01:33:15.188 --> 01:33:17.730 align:center
Otherwise, you're gonna miss out
on 15 years of memories,
01:33:17.813 --> 01:33:20.480 align:center
and you're not even gonna remember
why you fought in the first place.
01:33:27.563 --> 01:33:29.771 align:center
Welcome to Best of the Best!
01:33:30.605 --> 01:33:35.146 align:center
Tonight, we crown the top
Bollywood dance team in the nation.
01:33:49.230 --> 01:33:50.730 align:center
Okay!
01:33:50.813 --> 01:33:53.146 align:center
Last looks on costumes! Thank you.
01:33:53.230 --> 01:33:54.146 align:center
- Ronak.
- Yeah?
01:33:54.230 --> 01:33:55.730 align:center
- Check props. Sumi.
- Okay.
01:33:56.230 --> 01:34:00.271 align:center
Oh! You are HPV!
We just can't get rid of you.
01:34:00.355 --> 01:34:02.855 align:center
I'm sure we're not your first STI.
01:34:04.188 --> 01:34:07.646 align:center
Just remember, you're not here
'cause you deserve to be.
01:34:07.730 --> 01:34:09.438 align:center
You're here 'cause you complained.
01:34:10.021 --> 01:34:11.271 align:center
UCLA on deck!
01:34:11.355 --> 01:34:12.730 align:center
I'm gonna kill her.
01:34:13.271 --> 01:34:15.688 align:center
- Let her go, killer bee.
- Makeup lying around…
01:34:15.771 --> 01:34:16.938 align:center
Where's Maya?
01:34:17.438 --> 01:34:19.355 align:center
I need my lip gloss. Where's my lip gloss?
01:34:31.605 --> 01:34:33.688 align:center
No, Mom, I promise you they're there.
01:34:33.771 --> 01:34:35.771 align:center
She's saying
there's nothing under my name.
01:34:35.855 --> 01:34:38.188 align:center
Can you please check again? Hang on, Maya.
01:34:38.730 --> 01:34:40.730 align:center
Hey. We're about to go on.
01:34:40.813 --> 01:34:42.230 align:center
Yeah. One sec.
01:34:42.313 --> 01:34:44.563 align:center
Is that Anjali? How is she doing?
01:34:44.646 --> 01:34:45.521 align:center
Chill. She's fine.
01:34:45.605 --> 01:34:47.855 align:center
Then why is she dropping out
of computer science?
01:34:47.938 --> 01:34:51.021 align:center
Wait, wait. Okay, she found the passes!
We'll talk after the show.
01:34:51.105 --> 01:34:52.938 align:center
Oh… okay, yeah. Bye.
01:34:56.771 --> 01:34:58.730 align:center
I just wanna say, you're doing good…
01:34:58.813 --> 01:35:01.730 align:center
So, my mom said
you dropped out of comp sci?
01:35:01.813 --> 01:35:03.230 align:center
Oh, yeah.
01:35:04.021 --> 01:35:07.230 align:center
You know, actually learning the material
made me realize how much I…
01:35:07.313 --> 01:35:08.396 align:center
How do I put this?
01:35:08.480 --> 01:35:09.688 align:center
Hate it?
01:35:12.271 --> 01:35:14.105 align:center
So, what's your new major?
01:35:14.188 --> 01:35:15.813 align:center
Uh, undecided.
01:35:16.730 --> 01:35:18.938 align:center
I've spent so much of my life
doing whatever you did,
01:35:19.021 --> 01:35:22.396 align:center
I just… need some time to figure out
what I actually want, you know?
01:35:23.063 --> 01:35:25.146 align:center
Can't keep copying off you forever.
01:35:27.730 --> 01:35:30.063 align:center
Anj, look, I am so sorry
01:35:30.146 --> 01:35:32.396 align:center
for all the awful things
I said about you, okay?
01:35:32.480 --> 01:35:34.188 align:center
- I--
- Maya, stop.
01:35:35.105 --> 01:35:38.396 align:center
Okay? I'm not upset about what you said.
01:35:38.480 --> 01:35:40.730 align:center
I'm upset about what you didn't say.
01:35:41.646 --> 01:35:44.105 align:center
I mean,
how could you not tell me about lead?
01:35:45.105 --> 01:35:46.813 align:center
What was I supposed to say, Anj?
01:35:46.896 --> 01:35:50.771 align:center
You were so happy to be lead.
I could never take that from you.
01:35:50.855 --> 01:35:53.646 align:center
But I can't be happy if you're not.
01:35:55.063 --> 01:35:58.188 align:center
And I hate that I didn't see it.
01:36:02.438 --> 01:36:05.813 align:center
I've just spent my entire life
always being the weird one.
01:36:06.396 --> 01:36:09.563 align:center
Or the difficult one.
And when they made you lead…
01:36:10.480 --> 01:36:11.480 align:center
I don't know.
01:36:12.938 --> 01:36:13.980 align:center
It felt normal.
01:36:15.480 --> 01:36:17.188 align:center
But look. You didn't know that, okay?
01:36:17.271 --> 01:36:18.605 align:center
But I should have.
01:36:19.438 --> 01:36:20.438 align:center
I should have.
01:36:21.605 --> 01:36:23.438 align:center
It was happening right in front of me.
01:36:25.271 --> 01:36:27.771 align:center
Y'all ready for more show?
01:36:27.855 --> 01:36:32.271 align:center
Next up, UCLA Agni!
01:36:43.396 --> 01:36:44.563 align:center
So,
01:36:45.896 --> 01:36:47.355 align:center
are we still best friends?
01:36:48.646 --> 01:36:50.813 align:center
We were never best friends, Maya.
01:36:52.188 --> 01:36:54.271 align:center
We've always been sisters.
01:37:03.521 --> 01:37:04.646 align:center
Uh…
01:37:05.605 --> 01:37:06.771 align:center
Front row.
01:37:07.313 --> 01:37:08.480 align:center
On the left.
01:37:17.855 --> 01:37:19.646 align:center
I couldn't let her miss this.
01:37:26.563 --> 01:37:30.313 align:center
For centuries, the Koh-i-Noor
diamond was our greatest treasure.
01:37:31.146 --> 01:37:32.938 align:center
Until it was stolen.
01:37:34.813 --> 01:37:38.271 align:center
But our wealth was never theirs to take.
01:37:39.896 --> 01:37:42.355 align:center
Now it's time to settle the score.
01:37:43.105 --> 01:37:45.646 align:center
And take back what's ours.
01:37:45.730 --> 01:37:47.313 align:center
To all museum security…
01:37:47.396 --> 01:37:49.521 align:center
…this is your only warning.
01:37:49.605 --> 01:37:51.438 align:center
Stay out of our way.
01:37:52.355 --> 01:37:56.313 align:center
Museum security breach.
Museum security breach.
01:39:31.938 --> 01:39:34.980 align:center
We're not here to steal the diamond.
01:39:36.188 --> 01:39:37.230 align:center
We don't need it.
01:39:37.313 --> 01:39:39.021 align:center
We're enough without it.
01:39:41.521 --> 01:39:42.688 align:center
- Wassup?
- Huh?
01:39:42.771 --> 01:39:45.146 align:center
- Wassup? Wassup?
- Bitch, wassup?
01:39:45.230 --> 01:39:46.230 align:center
- Huh?
- Wassup?
01:39:46.313 --> 01:39:47.480 align:center
- Wassup?
- Wassup?
01:39:47.563 --> 01:39:48.980 align:center
- Huh?
- Wassup?
01:39:49.063 --> 01:39:50.271 align:center
Wassup?
01:40:02.646 --> 01:40:03.813 align:center
Oh, come on!
01:40:03.896 --> 01:40:06.605 align:center
- What happened to the power?
- Please stay calm.
01:40:06.688 --> 01:40:08.771 align:center
- We'll check circuit breakers.
- Keep dancing?
01:40:08.855 --> 01:40:11.063 align:center
- We're about to win.
- What do we do?
01:40:11.646 --> 01:40:13.646 align:center
There's no way
we did all this for nothing.
01:40:38.105 --> 01:40:39.813 align:center
We've always been sisters.
01:40:42.855 --> 01:40:44.063 align:center
Maya, what are you doing?
01:40:54.646 --> 01:40:56.896 align:center
I got you! Always.
01:41:06.021 --> 01:41:07.230 align:center
Wait.
01:42:43.355 --> 01:42:44.230 align:center
Power's back!
01:42:44.313 --> 01:42:45.980 align:center
Five, six, seven, eight!
01:43:28.271 --> 01:43:29.771 align:center
Whoo!
01:43:34.313 --> 01:43:37.771 align:center
UCLA! UCLA!
01:43:37.855 --> 01:43:42.521 align:center
- UCLA! UCLA!
- Yes! Yes!
01:43:42.605 --> 01:43:44.938 align:center
UCLA! UCLA!
01:43:46.896 --> 01:43:49.730 align:center
- You never know.
- No, I know. I know.
01:43:49.813 --> 01:43:52.480 align:center
- I think you would.
- I totally do. Oh yeah.
01:43:58.605 --> 01:43:59.563 align:center
Hey.
01:44:01.688 --> 01:44:03.813 align:center
That was incredible.
01:44:03.896 --> 01:44:04.813 align:center
Thank you.
01:44:08.146 --> 01:44:09.688 align:center
We won!
01:44:14.813 --> 01:44:15.771 align:center
Ah.
01:44:16.813 --> 01:44:18.271 align:center
There's a lot of people around.
01:44:19.438 --> 01:44:21.188 align:center
Yeah. Let 'em watch.
01:44:36.938 --> 01:44:38.063 align:center
I gotta go.
01:44:38.146 --> 01:44:39.938 align:center
Hey. Where you goin'?
01:44:40.021 --> 01:44:41.688 align:center
Longtime tradition.
01:44:48.438 --> 01:44:50.896 align:center
I got someone's favorite!
01:44:50.980 --> 01:44:52.980 align:center
- Dope. Sour cream? Extra?
- Oh!
01:44:53.563 --> 01:44:54.855 align:center
- Yeah!
- Come on!
01:44:54.938 --> 01:44:56.521 align:center
This is not amateur hour.
01:44:56.605 --> 01:44:59.313 align:center
I am so hungry, I could eat ten of these.
01:44:59.396 --> 01:45:00.605 align:center
Here we go.
01:45:01.646 --> 01:45:03.146 align:center
Come to Mama.