WEBVTT

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Dorset Hall was bought
by the fourth Lord Bassington in 1802

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for the princely sum of £3,000.

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The eighth Lord Bassington
still resides here.

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It's only with his kind permission
that we're able to visit today.

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So... follow me.

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The house is famed for
its extensive collection of antiquities,

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which led Lord Byron to quip

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that it made the British Museum
look like a knickknack shop.

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Highlights include

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the priceless collection
of ivory chess pieces

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that date back to the Byzantine era,

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an ancient Egyptian sarcophagus, and--

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And the, uh, sacred headdress

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of the Aboriginal tribe
known as the Waka Waka.

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Clear off!

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I'll have no lizards in my house!

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You hear me?

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No fucking lizards...

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You know what it is, James?

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I'm angry. I'll tell you
what really champs my giblets.

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I should be an asset to them.
They should want me around. I'm smart.

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I'm a smart guy. I've got grades. It's...

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It blows my mind, man.

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I screw up one time...
maybe a couple, two, three times,

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all of a sudden, I'm persona non gratis,
not wanted, <i>en voyage.</i>

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It's... it's insane.

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- It's ridiculous, is what it is, James.
- Freddy?

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Just chill out, man.

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Maybe I don't wanna chill out, James.

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Maybe... maybe I need to get out of here.
What do you say? You and me.

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I can't, bruv.
I've gotta meet someone.

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Or more like something. Something special.

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You know what?

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- Oh, whoa! What are you doing? Freddy!
- I'm staying right here.

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Oorah!

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Freddy!

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Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

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As part of a general push
to increase productivity,

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we've decided to expand our operation
on your estate.

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The new weed farm would be underground,

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but we'd be using the stables for access
and somewhere to keep the gennies.

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No, Susie. It's not happening.

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We agreed to move out on the proviso
that you'd help us make more money.

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So while we await a detailed breakdown
of your new business plan,

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I am simply cracking on.

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Do it somewhere else.
Do it on one of your many other holdings.

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What I do with other properties
in my portfolio

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isn't something you should worry about.

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What I'm worried about is the fact
that we agreed a timeline for your exit,

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and now you're talking about
expanding your operation on my estate.

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Freddy's gone fishing.

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- Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

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Great. Stay in touch.

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Not the stables, darling.

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They're of significant
historical importance.

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Mother, Anne Boleyn
didn't change her horses there

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on her way to visit Henry VIII.

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By the time they were built, she'd been
a headless corpse for 300 years.

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- Well, they may have been updated.
- It doesn't matter.

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I'm not gonna let them
expand their operation on the grounds.

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Would you like me
to have a word with Susie Glass?

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You know I can be quite persuasive
when I need to be.

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No, Mother. I don't want you
getting involved with these people.

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I've seen the effect it's had on Freddy.

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Yes, and the sooner
you get rid of them, the better.

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I just need to figure out a way
of making them more money

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with a little less fuss.

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Now, come on.

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Nothing like a good funeral
to put things in perspective.

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Let not your hearts be troubled.

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Believe in God, believe also in me.

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In my Father's house are many rooms.

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If it were not so, I would have told you.

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I go to prepare a place for you.

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And if I go and prepare a place for you...

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What's with the window?

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Oh, it was in his will.

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Apparently, he wanted
to be buried standing up,

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sticking out of the ground,
so he could have a view of the house.

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Well, that's unpleasant.

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Oh, that's the son there, Max.

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Hmm.

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He was one of Freddy's
acting chums from Durham.

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If you think you've seen him before,

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he did an advert for shampoo
that was everywhere.

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No man cometh unto the Father,
but by me.

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If ye had known me,

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ye should have known my Father...

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He's going to inherit the entire estate?

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Yes.

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The house, the debts,
the financial burden.

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You two have a lot in common
in that respect.

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Hello, Rosie.

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How's your tummy?

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- My tummy's fine. Thank you for asking.
- You ought to be more careful.

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I might not be around
to help you next time.

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Hopefully, there won't be a next time.

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How's your American friend?

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You're not jealous, are you?

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A little protective, perhaps.

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Well, that's very sweet of you.

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- But I can look after myself.
- Oh, I'm sure you can.

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But I'd be wary of Mr. Johnston.

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Behind the air of pomposity,
there's a man you don't wanna fuck with.

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Speak for yourself, Eddie.

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How well do you know the son?

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Oh, Max?

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He's rather lovely.
He's your classic struggling artist.

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Just a little too desperate
to be discovered.

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Ever since his father died,
he's been like a bird with a broken wing.

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Would you introduce me?

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You're up to something, Eddie.

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Never.

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I remember Freddy.
The year above me at Durham.

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He was a bloody good Demetrius.

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<i>Midsummer Night's Dream.</i> I was Lysander.

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He should have stuck at it.
Seriously, he could've walked into RADA.

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Oh, Freddy has many talents,
but sticking isn't one of them.

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I heard you've been getting a lot of work.

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Oh, I can't complain.

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Acting is like any great art form.

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It's the paradoxical reconciliation
of our dualistic identities

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to recognize ironic beauty
concealed within the malign.

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Though there's easier ways
of making a living, God knows.

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Max, darling, you have my sympathies.

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Now I must go and rescue my mother.

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I wanted to offer my condolences.
I recently lost my own father.

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- A right kick in the balls, isn't it?
- Certainly.

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Then add to that the inheritance tax,
which is ludicrous.

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When I found out the running costs,
I thought they were fucking joking.

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Could've been the same for me.

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Fortunately,
my father made... certain provisions.

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You know, uh,

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it may be worth
you and I sitting down, actually.

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There's a small business opportunity
that... might be of help to you.

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Supply a product
that is highly profitable,

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totally unregulated,

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inherently benign, and incredibly popular.

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I'm warming to this, Eddie. I really am.

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It's the kind of risk-reward relationship
I could get on board with.

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Free market, fucking great.

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Lack of regulation, check.

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No taxation? Yeah, baby.

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Smidge of illegality?

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Yeah, well, no business plan's perfect.

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There is, however, one tiny little

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reputational obstacle
that we need to navigate

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before we could proceed,

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and it's... it's slightly delicate.

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Well, I can be extremely discreet
if necessary.

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You must remember, your father and mine,
they used to fish for salmon on the Spey.

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That's right.

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And that matters,

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particularly as it's my father
who's the cause

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of this specific challenge.

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<i>I have in my possession
a series of documents</i>

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<i>detailing the purchase
of a particularly salacious artifact.</i>

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<i>If these documents
were ever to come to light,</i>

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<i>they would cause considerable scandal.</i>

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<i>In return for £500,000,
I will hand them over to you.</i>

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<i>If not, I will be forced
to pass them on to the nation's press.</i>

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<i>Do not make the mistake
of underestimating me.</i>

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Can't you just ignore it?

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Your father clearly had some demons.
Whatever he did dies with him.

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I'm about to have a second audition
for a role in a major Hollywood movie.

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But, as you can see,

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any kind of hoo-ha is gonna
seriously torpedo my chances.

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You've clearly got some... connections,

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and I imagine they would come replete

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with the necessary skill set
to deal with this situation.

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Here's how I see it going.

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You make contact with the blackmailer.

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You bring them, and whatever
evidence they have, back here,

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I'll take a look,
make sure it's the real deal, destroy it,

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and then... you can help me convince them
never to darken my door again.

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There is, um, one more thing
I would, uh, just ask, Eddie.

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When you lay your hands on the file,

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I'd really appreciate it
if you didn't look inside.

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Whatever secrets my father had,
I'd appreciate it if they stayed secret.

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A matter of respect for the deceased.

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Whatever is in the file
is none of my concern.

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Your father's secrets will remain secret.
You have my word.

00:12:09.125 --> 00:12:10.041 align:center
But let's be clear.

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If I do this for you,

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then we have an agreement.

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If you can make this problem go away,

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you and your criminal associates
can turn this place

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into the Hanging Gardens
of the Original Rude Boy Ganja Man

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for all I care.

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Uh...

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I, um...

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I... I thought
you might like some refreshment.

00:12:35.708 --> 00:12:37.416 align:center
That's very kind, Your Grace.

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- Two sugars, if memory serves?
- Absolutely.

00:12:42.791 --> 00:12:46.333 align:center
You seem to have worked wonders
with that dog.

00:12:46.416 --> 00:12:49.125 align:center
She's a wonderful dog.
Pleasure to have around.

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I'm sure Eddie's very appreciative.

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It's not like he hasn't got enough
to contend with right now.

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I wonder if we could be
of some assistance to him.

00:13:02.958 --> 00:13:04.041 align:center
Come on, Geoff.

00:13:04.125 --> 00:13:06.000 align:center
What have you got up your sleeve?

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What if we could find
an alternative venue for their activities?

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I'm sure you've been acquainted
with Mr. Rokes

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from Green River Farm next door.

00:13:16.291 --> 00:13:18.791 align:center
The sheep farmer? What are you saying?

00:13:20.041 --> 00:13:22.416 align:center
Well, sheep need a lot of land to graze.

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And lamb's
not turning a profit these days.

00:13:25.625 --> 00:13:27.125 align:center
He's broke?

00:13:27.625 --> 00:13:31.791 align:center
Mr. Rokes is being investigated for fraud
by the Ministry of Agriculture.

00:13:31.875 --> 00:13:33.541 align:center
So he's not just broke.

00:13:36.125 --> 00:13:37.791 align:center
He's as bent as a barbed wire fence.

00:13:39.125 --> 00:13:40.291 align:center
There's a sheep auction today,

00:13:40.375 --> 00:13:43.291 align:center
and I'm pretty sure
Mr. Rokes will be in attendance.

00:13:46.541 --> 00:13:48.375 align:center
You sly old fox.

00:13:52.041 --> 00:13:55.041 align:center
<i>Plants are actually
a lot more like humans</i>

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<i>than people tend to think.</i>

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<i>They breathe.</i>

00:13:58.583 --> 00:13:59.958 align:center
<i>They're territorial.</i>

00:14:00.041 --> 00:14:01.791 align:center
<i>They communicate with each other.</i>

00:14:02.375 --> 00:14:04.416 align:center
<i>How come you know
so much about plants?</i>

00:14:04.500 --> 00:14:05.875 align:center
<i>It's what I do, I guess.</i>

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- I'm like a botanist.
- Oh, no way.

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My granddad used to run a nursery.

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Flowers, not kids.

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I like flowers.

00:14:17.291 --> 00:14:18.166 align:center
Hmm.

00:14:19.000 --> 00:14:21.541 align:center
I'd love to see your plants one day.

00:14:21.625 --> 00:14:22.541 align:center
Oh.

00:14:23.958 --> 00:14:25.416 align:center
That's a bit of a tricky one.

00:14:26.625 --> 00:14:31.958 align:center
Where I work is sort of like a...
restricted access area sort of thing.

00:14:33.666 --> 00:14:34.833 align:center
I trust you.

00:14:34.916 --> 00:14:38.875 align:center
It's just... recently we... we've been
having a bit of trouble at work.

00:14:40.291 --> 00:14:41.625 align:center
Some of our plants went missing.

00:14:43.250 --> 00:14:46.208 align:center
Oddly enough,
it was on the day that we met.

00:14:47.666 --> 00:14:50.541 align:center
What? You don't think
I had anything to do with that, do you?

00:14:50.625 --> 00:14:51.958 align:center
Oh, no, course not.

00:14:52.791 --> 00:14:53.666 align:center
Yeah.

00:14:55.083 --> 00:14:57.166 align:center
I mean, what am I gonna steal
a load of plants for?

00:15:05.750 --> 00:15:08.958 align:center
<i>Traditionally, the selection
process for a prospective new landlord</i>

00:15:09.041 --> 00:15:10.708 align:center
takes place over a couple of months.

00:15:10.791 --> 00:15:13.250 align:center
We like to give their bums
a good old sniff.

00:15:13.333 --> 00:15:16.291 align:center
We don't just rock up at funerals
waving our check books around.

00:15:16.375 --> 00:15:19.458 align:center
Look, it was a business opportunity
that was presented to me.

00:15:19.541 --> 00:15:21.250 align:center
And now I'm presenting it to you.

00:15:21.333 --> 00:15:24.250 align:center
This gives you an alternate venue,
an increased capacity,

00:15:25.208 --> 00:15:28.791 align:center
and replaces the existing operation
on my estate by the end of the year.

00:15:30.625 --> 00:15:33.833 align:center
I'm willing to consider expanding
the operation to a 12th location,

00:15:33.916 --> 00:15:36.833 align:center
but when you start talking about
a bit of blackmail,

00:15:36.916 --> 00:15:39.333 align:center
then it's all starting
to sound deeply problematic.

00:15:39.416 --> 00:15:43.250 align:center
It's a loose end that I intend to tie up.
Very simply, very easily.

00:15:45.166 --> 00:15:47.083 align:center
I'm willing to take
a face-to-face meeting,

00:15:47.166 --> 00:15:50.500 align:center
but I'm not making any promises,
and I don't want any shenanigans.

00:15:50.583 --> 00:15:51.708 align:center
No shenanigans.

00:16:19.375 --> 00:16:20.250 align:center
Okay.

00:16:25.666 --> 00:16:26.583 align:center
Who are you?

00:16:27.083 --> 00:16:28.458 align:center
Don't turn around.

00:16:28.541 --> 00:16:29.791 align:center
All right. All right.

00:16:31.041 --> 00:16:33.875 align:center
- I'm the guy with the money.
- Put the bag on the floor.

00:16:34.375 --> 00:16:36.041 align:center
That's not how this is gonna work.

00:16:36.125 --> 00:16:38.583 align:center
I'm the one who says
how this is gonna work.

00:16:39.166 --> 00:16:40.500 align:center
Otherwise, your mate's face

00:16:40.583 --> 00:16:43.791 align:center
is gonna be on the cover
of every newspaper tomorrow morning.

00:16:43.875 --> 00:16:49.125 align:center
The only way you're gonna get your money
is if you do exactly as I... say.

00:16:49.833 --> 00:16:50.833 align:center
You're Frank?

00:16:52.041 --> 00:16:55.041 align:center
Come on,
give me the documents, then.

00:16:55.125 --> 00:16:57.291 align:center
I get it. You want the documents.

00:16:57.375 --> 00:16:58.291 align:center
Yes.

00:16:58.375 --> 00:17:00.500 align:center
Well, I don't have
the documents here.

00:17:00.583 --> 00:17:02.666 align:center
Shall we go get them then? Please.

00:17:06.291 --> 00:17:07.375 align:center
A 12,

00:17:07.458 --> 00:17:08.333 align:center
a 20,

00:17:09.125 --> 00:17:10.208 align:center
two 53s,

00:17:11.708 --> 00:17:13.166 align:center
and a 69.

00:17:28.583 --> 00:17:32.000 align:center
I like to think of myself
as a fairly patient man, Frank.

00:17:32.666 --> 00:17:35.791 align:center
But when you start ordering
chicken bao buns--

00:17:35.875 --> 00:17:36.875 align:center
Let me translate.

00:17:36.958 --> 00:17:38.916 align:center
Twelve is vegetable spring rolls.

00:17:40.166 --> 00:17:41.666 align:center
Twenty is confit of pork.

00:17:42.958 --> 00:17:45.208 align:center
Fifty-three is crispy noodle chips,

00:17:46.541 --> 00:17:48.583 align:center
which I've ordered twice
'cause I'm quite partial to.

00:17:50.083 --> 00:17:52.958 align:center
And 69 you'll find isn't on the menu.

00:17:54.041 --> 00:17:56.875 align:center
For the simple reason that 69

00:17:57.375 --> 00:17:58.208 align:center
isn't a dish.

00:17:59.541 --> 00:18:00.541 align:center
What is it, then?

00:18:00.625 --> 00:18:01.583 align:center
It's not a "what."

00:18:04.916 --> 00:18:06.083 align:center
It's a "who."

00:18:07.375 --> 00:18:09.375 align:center
- And here he is.

00:18:11.791 --> 00:18:14.458 align:center
- All right, all right.
- It's all there, every penny.

00:18:17.125 --> 00:18:17.958 align:center
Whoa!

00:18:18.041 --> 00:18:22.000 align:center
Frank, why don't you explain
to the nice man this isn't his money?

00:18:22.083 --> 00:18:24.583 align:center
The money in that bag is owed to me.

00:18:25.083 --> 00:18:26.958 align:center
And what's owed to me belongs to you.

00:18:27.041 --> 00:18:28.750 align:center
- Sorry.
- Fucker...

00:18:46.416 --> 00:18:48.875 align:center
- Hello, Susie.
- Just checking in to see how you're doing.

00:18:48.958 --> 00:18:51.291 align:center
Well, it's not going exactly to plan.

00:18:54.333 --> 00:18:57.291 align:center
So you gave him half a mil,
now you've got nothing to show for it?

00:18:57.375 --> 00:18:59.458 align:center
Sounds a bit sloppy,
if you don't mind me saying.

00:18:59.541 --> 00:19:01.750 align:center
<i>What's the name
of the guy that lent him the money?</i>

00:19:02.666 --> 00:19:05.458 align:center
I don't know.
He's a large Chinese gentleman.

00:19:09.291 --> 00:19:10.291 align:center
She wants to talk to you.

00:19:13.083 --> 00:19:14.791 align:center
Can I help you? Yeah.

00:19:15.583 --> 00:19:18.791 align:center
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I see. Yeah.

00:19:20.375 --> 00:19:22.125 align:center
Yeah. All right.

00:19:22.208 --> 00:19:25.458 align:center
When you put it like that,
it does have a bearing on the situation.

00:19:25.958 --> 00:19:27.583 align:center
With the greatest respect, Susie,

00:19:27.666 --> 00:19:30.375 align:center
that money's a longstanding debt
that needs to be repaid.

00:19:30.958 --> 00:19:33.041 align:center
- For fuck's sake.
- That's very decent of you.

00:19:33.125 --> 00:19:36.208 align:center
If you can guarantee my money,
I'll give your man the address.

00:19:36.791 --> 00:19:38.458 align:center
Tell your father I'll send him some buns.

00:19:40.458 --> 00:19:44.083 align:center
You should've mentioned Susie Glass.
She said she'll meet you there.

00:19:59.250 --> 00:20:00.166 align:center
Hello, Susan.

00:20:01.333 --> 00:20:02.500 align:center
Compliments of the chef.

00:20:03.291 --> 00:20:06.791 align:center
Enjoying your little sojourn
into the murky world of criminality?

00:20:07.541 --> 00:20:08.375 align:center
Uh...

00:20:09.208 --> 00:20:10.791 align:center
It's certainly edifying.

00:20:10.875 --> 00:20:12.291 align:center
- Shall we?
- Let's.

00:20:24.666 --> 00:20:25.875 align:center
You're not the taxi.

00:20:27.000 --> 00:20:30.041 align:center
No, we were...
We're looking for your dad. Is he around?

00:20:30.708 --> 00:20:31.833 align:center
He's busy packing.

00:20:31.916 --> 00:20:34.291 align:center
That's all right, darling.
This won't take long.

00:20:39.000 --> 00:20:41.458 align:center
Hello, Francis. You going somewhere?

00:20:42.541 --> 00:20:44.916 align:center
Um... How did you find me?

00:20:45.000 --> 00:20:48.041 align:center
Oh, that would be down
to your helpful Chinese friend.

00:20:48.125 --> 00:20:51.083 align:center
Now, weren't you supposed to give us
something before you go?

00:20:51.750 --> 00:20:54.041 align:center
If you can find it amongst all these bags.

00:20:54.750 --> 00:20:56.750 align:center
Your dad's a bit of a messy pup, isn't he?

00:20:57.333 --> 00:21:01.375 align:center
Yeah,
Daddy's a bit of a mess, isn't he?

00:21:01.458 --> 00:21:03.750 align:center
That's what Mummy's
always saying.

00:21:03.833 --> 00:21:07.583 align:center
But you'd be surprised what nutrition
can be found in other people's stools.

00:21:08.375 --> 00:21:09.458 align:center
See that one there?

00:21:09.541 --> 00:21:11.458 align:center
That's a former cabinet minister.

00:21:11.541 --> 00:21:14.250 align:center
Collects illegally smuggled birds' eggs.

00:21:14.333 --> 00:21:17.083 align:center
This one
is a certain children's TV presenter.

00:21:17.166 --> 00:21:18.625 align:center
Got himself a taste for, uh...

00:21:19.708 --> 00:21:21.541 align:center
You like the breakfast show,
don't you, darling?

00:21:22.750 --> 00:21:26.250 align:center
Daddy used to be
one of the top journalists in the country.

00:21:26.333 --> 00:21:28.041 align:center
Then the oligarchs took over.

00:21:28.125 --> 00:21:32.541 align:center
Yes, no freedom of the press anymore.
You have to answer to the powers that be.

00:21:33.250 --> 00:21:36.833 align:center
And if you don't follow their narrative,
they bury you. But not me.

00:21:36.916 --> 00:21:38.500 align:center
My daddy's got integrity.

00:21:38.583 --> 00:21:39.666 align:center
- Oh yeah.

00:21:40.166 --> 00:21:42.625 align:center
Big plastic bags full of it.

00:21:44.416 --> 00:21:46.083 align:center
Tell you what, darling,

00:21:46.791 --> 00:21:49.041 align:center
why don't you tell Mummy
to make a cup of tea?

00:21:49.125 --> 00:21:51.000 align:center
We don't wanna be late for our flight.

00:21:51.083 --> 00:21:52.708 align:center
Oh, no, don't you worry.

00:21:52.791 --> 00:21:54.458 align:center
We've got loads of time. Go on.

00:21:58.916 --> 00:22:01.250 align:center
- Sit down, Frank.
- Whoa, steady.

00:22:02.916 --> 00:22:06.750 align:center
We don't wanna hurt you or your family.
But we want the file.

00:22:12.375 --> 00:22:13.416 align:center
Here, that's it.

00:22:15.416 --> 00:22:17.458 align:center
- This better be it.
- Aren't you gonna have a look?

00:22:18.958 --> 00:22:21.791 align:center
See, that's just it, isn't it?
No one wants to look inside the folder.

00:22:22.291 --> 00:22:23.708 align:center
That's why the world's gone to hell.

00:22:23.791 --> 00:22:27.125 align:center
I'm not gonna look because,
firstly, it's of no interest to me.

00:22:27.208 --> 00:22:28.333 align:center
And, secondly,

00:22:29.666 --> 00:22:30.791 align:center
you're coming with us.

00:22:33.708 --> 00:22:35.666 align:center
No one said anything about going anywhere.

00:22:39.041 --> 00:22:40.500 align:center
You really not gonna open it?

00:22:42.333 --> 00:22:43.166 align:center
No.

00:22:44.500 --> 00:22:47.125 align:center
- Not even a little bit curious?
- Nah.

00:22:47.625 --> 00:22:50.041 align:center
Let's get this done and get Max on board.

00:22:50.958 --> 00:22:51.916 align:center
Fair enough.

00:22:59.416 --> 00:23:03.000 align:center
One-ten, 11, dot. Twelve. I'm bid 13,
bid 14. £15 I'm bid. 16.

00:23:03.083 --> 00:23:08.583 align:center
Ninety, you. Ninety, you. £100 bid.
102. 102. 102.

00:23:08.666 --> 00:23:09.916 align:center
Yeah, there he is.

00:23:11.291 --> 00:23:13.458 align:center
Standing up, front row,
the guy to the left.

00:23:15.625 --> 00:23:20.208 align:center
What do you think's my best approach?
I mean... I can hardly walk up to the man

00:23:20.291 --> 00:23:24.416 align:center
and ask him if he'd like to house
a cannabis farm under one of his barns.

00:23:24.500 --> 00:23:26.083 align:center
I know his estate manager.

00:23:26.166 --> 00:23:27.625 align:center
I could always introduce you.

00:23:28.166 --> 00:23:32.250 align:center
But, in my opinion, I think it's better
if you go up and meet him yourself.

00:23:32.333 --> 00:23:33.916 align:center
I mean, he'll know who you are.

00:23:34.875 --> 00:23:38.458 align:center
I'm sure he'd be susceptible
to your powers of... persuasion, ma'am.

00:23:38.541 --> 00:23:41.458 align:center
190 bid. 191, 191, 191.

00:23:41.541 --> 00:23:43.458 align:center
You really think so, Geoff?

00:23:44.333 --> 00:23:46.791 align:center
Well, we know he needs the money.

00:23:47.500 --> 00:23:50.583 align:center
And you are very good with people,
if you don't mind me saying so.

00:23:51.875 --> 00:23:54.250 align:center
Right, then. Wish me luck.

00:23:56.083 --> 00:23:57.000 align:center
Good luck.

00:24:12.041 --> 00:24:13.500 align:center
At 191...

00:24:20.875 --> 00:24:21.708 align:center
Do you need a hand?

00:24:22.958 --> 00:24:24.041 align:center
I'm fine, Geoff.

00:24:25.833 --> 00:24:28.333 align:center
You know you shouldn't
smoke fish with pine, don't you?

00:24:28.833 --> 00:24:29.666 align:center
Huh?

00:24:29.750 --> 00:24:33.500 align:center
You're planning on smoking
that beautiful carp, but the resin,

00:24:34.625 --> 00:24:35.708 align:center
it poisons the flesh.

00:24:47.583 --> 00:24:48.416 align:center
Tsk!

00:24:49.625 --> 00:24:51.291 align:center
I can't do anything right, can I?

00:24:57.000 --> 00:24:59.250 align:center
I mean, Eddie's off
gallivanting around the country

00:24:59.333 --> 00:25:00.416 align:center
pretending to be a gangster.

00:25:03.458 --> 00:25:07.500 align:center
And I'm stuck here, alone,
with this... dead fish.

00:25:14.916 --> 00:25:15.750 align:center
Freddy.

00:25:18.333 --> 00:25:20.750 align:center
It's a lucky man
who's happy with his place in life.

00:25:34.250 --> 00:25:35.833 align:center
It's like a secret garden.

00:25:36.333 --> 00:25:37.458 align:center
I know, right?

00:25:38.583 --> 00:25:40.000 align:center
That's how I like to see it.

00:25:41.083 --> 00:25:45.291 align:center
It's like an underground world
filled with magical plants

00:25:45.875 --> 00:25:48.750 align:center
that bring nothing but righteousness

00:25:49.541 --> 00:25:53.791 align:center
and can help everyone feel so much better.

00:25:55.583 --> 00:25:59.375 align:center
And it's all being outlawed by Babylon.

00:26:01.250 --> 00:26:02.958 align:center
How many plants you got down here?

00:26:04.833 --> 00:26:07.791 align:center
Rather not get into those details,
to be honest.

00:26:07.875 --> 00:26:11.166 align:center
It's a bit... a bit sensitive information.

00:26:12.416 --> 00:26:14.458 align:center
You worried
I'm gonna report you?

00:26:16.166 --> 00:26:17.291 align:center
No, of course not.

00:26:18.041 --> 00:26:22.000 align:center
It's just I like to take
my professional responsibilities

00:26:22.791 --> 00:26:23.916 align:center
very seriously.

00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:24.916 align:center
Me too.

00:26:25.000 --> 00:26:25.833 align:center
Oh, snap.

00:26:26.583 --> 00:26:28.250 align:center
What kind of work do you do?

00:26:30.125 --> 00:26:31.250 align:center
I'm a consultant.

00:26:31.916 --> 00:26:35.458 align:center
People bring me in when they've got
a problem, and I help them fix it.

00:26:36.500 --> 00:26:41.250 align:center
A jack of all trades but a master of none
is oftentimes better than a master of one.

00:26:41.333 --> 00:26:43.375 align:center
Wow. You're so clever.

00:26:43.458 --> 00:26:45.583 align:center
D'you wanna smoke a joint or something?

00:26:45.666 --> 00:26:49.000 align:center
I've got loads
of different flavors and strains.

00:26:49.083 --> 00:26:50.333 align:center
Uh, I don't smoke.

00:26:51.583 --> 00:26:55.625 align:center
- I don't mind if you do though.
- Maybe I'll just have a cheeky little one.

00:26:56.666 --> 00:26:58.333 align:center
I'm sure there's one in the ashtray.

00:26:58.416 --> 00:27:00.166 align:center
- Just give me two secs.
- Okay.

00:27:00.666 --> 00:27:01.541 align:center
Be right back.

00:27:02.125 --> 00:27:04.458 align:center
You reckon
the world would be a better place

00:27:04.541 --> 00:27:05.791 align:center
if everyone smoked weed?

00:27:06.416 --> 00:27:07.250 align:center
Um...

00:27:07.916 --> 00:27:09.000 align:center
Not necessarily.

00:27:12.333 --> 00:27:14.583 align:center
But it'd definitely make it
a lot more calmer.

00:27:15.750 --> 00:27:19.041 align:center
You're gonna need a lot more than this
if you're gonna change the world.

00:27:19.541 --> 00:27:21.833 align:center
Oh, no. This spot, it's just one of 12.

00:27:23.041 --> 00:27:24.250 align:center
Each one as big as this?

00:27:25.250 --> 00:27:26.333 align:center
There's ones even bigger.

00:27:29.958 --> 00:27:31.833 align:center
That's a pretty substantial network.

00:27:32.541 --> 00:27:34.833 align:center
Sure you don't want a toke?

00:27:34.916 --> 00:27:37.291 align:center
Well, since I'm with
the king of green, why not?

00:27:49.041 --> 00:27:52.125 align:center
Look at this. I can't believe
I'm letting him off for half a mil.

00:27:52.625 --> 00:27:53.875 align:center
Don't get greedy.

00:27:53.958 --> 00:27:56.458 align:center
<i>We hand over the documents.
You get the money.</i>

00:27:56.541 --> 00:27:58.041 align:center
<i>Then you pay back your friend.</i>

00:28:04.708 --> 00:28:06.500 align:center
How fitting that you arrive at night.

00:28:06.583 --> 00:28:09.750 align:center
Really, Edward, your sense of timing
is wonderfully theatrical.

00:28:09.833 --> 00:28:12.875 align:center
We thought you'd be keen
to clean this mess up as soon as possible.

00:28:12.958 --> 00:28:14.500 align:center
Quite right. Quite right.

00:28:14.583 --> 00:28:16.916 align:center
This is my, uh,
associate, Susan Glass.

00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:19.208 align:center
Thrilled to meet you, Ms. Glass.

00:28:20.833 --> 00:28:23.458 align:center
- Eddie's told me all about you.
- Hmm. Has he now?

00:28:24.625 --> 00:28:27.208 align:center
Let me conclude
this rather sordid little business, then,

00:28:27.291 --> 00:28:29.541 align:center
so we can get into the weeds
and start hashing out a deal.

00:28:29.625 --> 00:28:30.458 align:center
Hmm.

00:28:31.875 --> 00:28:32.875 align:center
That for me?

00:28:33.458 --> 00:28:36.291 align:center
It's all there.
Photographs, files, documents, the lot.

00:28:36.875 --> 00:28:38.166 align:center
You didn't look inside?

00:28:39.333 --> 00:28:40.166 align:center
No, I didn't.

00:28:40.250 --> 00:28:42.541 align:center
Good man. Good man.

00:28:44.708 --> 00:28:47.291 align:center
Now, I'm well aware you could have
some additional backup

00:28:47.375 --> 00:28:48.583 align:center
squirreled away somewhere.

00:28:48.666 --> 00:28:51.083 align:center
That's why
I wanted to have this little chat.

00:28:51.666 --> 00:28:54.291 align:center
This is the last you'll see of me.
You have my word.

00:28:54.375 --> 00:28:56.833 align:center
Trouble is,

00:28:56.916 --> 00:28:58.833 align:center
your word's absolutely meaningless.

00:29:00.791 --> 00:29:04.041 align:center
Frank, I think you understand
the gravity of the situation.

00:29:04.666 --> 00:29:08.875 align:center
You're not to be heard from again, and if
that's understood, the money is yours.

00:29:08.958 --> 00:29:10.000 align:center
As promised.

00:29:15.333 --> 00:29:17.500 align:center
Just because
you've got some muscle now

00:29:18.333 --> 00:29:19.875 align:center
doesn't change what you really are.

00:29:20.375 --> 00:29:23.083 align:center
And what was in that envelope
is as compromising as it gets

00:29:23.166 --> 00:29:24.458 align:center
for you and your career.

00:29:25.916 --> 00:29:28.375 align:center
Whatever his father was doing,
it's over now.

00:29:28.458 --> 00:29:32.041 align:center
What are you talking about his father for?
I wasn't blackmailing his father.

00:29:32.125 --> 00:29:34.291 align:center
I was blackmailing that mad cunt.

00:29:41.833 --> 00:29:42.666 align:center
Well...

00:29:44.125 --> 00:29:46.166 align:center
that's somewhat of a revelation, Maxie.

00:29:48.500 --> 00:29:49.375 align:center
Okay.

00:29:50.958 --> 00:29:53.666 align:center
There's a perfectly reasonable explanation
for all of this,

00:29:53.750 --> 00:29:56.208 align:center
and it is nothing that will upset anyone

00:29:56.291 --> 00:29:59.541 align:center
unless they are...
unbelievably oversensitive.

00:29:59.625 --> 00:30:00.666 align:center
Hold your horses, cowboy.

00:30:01.750 --> 00:30:04.541 align:center
I think you need to adjust
your transparency settings.

00:30:05.875 --> 00:30:07.833 align:center
You need to tell us
what is going on right now.

00:30:07.916 --> 00:30:10.333 align:center
It's nothing.
It's a little quirk. It's a hobby.

00:30:10.416 --> 00:30:12.083 align:center
Right... now.

00:30:17.083 --> 00:30:18.125 align:center
Okay.

00:30:20.416 --> 00:30:26.000 align:center
If full transparency will help
grease the wheels of industry, then, um...

00:30:30.125 --> 00:30:31.083 align:center
...follow me.

00:30:40.416 --> 00:30:41.541 align:center
What do you make of them?

00:30:42.583 --> 00:30:43.583 align:center
They seem, uh,

00:30:44.666 --> 00:30:45.875 align:center
unremarkable.

00:30:45.958 --> 00:30:47.291 align:center
Take a closer look.

00:30:57.500 --> 00:30:58.666 align:center
Adolf Hitler.

00:31:02.791 --> 00:31:04.625 align:center
His use of light is second to none.

00:31:05.916 --> 00:31:07.458 align:center
If it wasn't for the war,

00:31:07.541 --> 00:31:10.125 align:center
he'd be remembered
with the likes of Monet.

00:31:12.208 --> 00:31:13.541 align:center
And I'm in possession

00:31:13.625 --> 00:31:16.625 align:center
of the largest collection of his work
outside of Switzerland.

00:31:18.916 --> 00:31:20.833 align:center
He was a visionary.

00:31:22.833 --> 00:31:24.958 align:center
These painting are average, at best.

00:31:25.458 --> 00:31:27.416 align:center
Anyone who thinks otherwise is deluded.

00:31:28.041 --> 00:31:30.375 align:center
I thought a man of your unique lineage

00:31:30.458 --> 00:31:33.250 align:center
might be able to appreciate
the work of a true master.

00:31:35.125 --> 00:31:38.833 align:center
See beyond the reputation of the man
to find the sublime in the malign.

00:31:38.916 --> 00:31:39.875 align:center
Your Lordship,

00:31:39.958 --> 00:31:43.041 align:center
maybe you could show them
the crown jewels.

00:31:46.666 --> 00:31:47.625 align:center
Maybe you're right.

00:31:50.750 --> 00:31:53.291 align:center
After an injury
at the Battle of the Somme,

00:31:53.375 --> 00:31:56.083 align:center
Adolf Hitler was examined
by an army doctor.

00:31:56.833 --> 00:32:01.083 align:center
The records show that he lost
a very particular part of his anatomy.

00:32:01.166 --> 00:32:03.333 align:center
When it came up for sale five years ago,

00:32:03.916 --> 00:32:06.208 align:center
I made sure nothing stood in my way.

00:32:06.916 --> 00:32:10.708 align:center
The sole physical remnant
of the Führer of the Third Reich.

00:32:10.791 --> 00:32:13.916 align:center
Preserved in formaldehyde
for nearly 80 years.

00:32:14.708 --> 00:32:16.916 align:center
Adolf Hitler's

00:32:17.708 --> 00:32:18.791 align:center
nutball.

00:32:24.833 --> 00:32:27.000 align:center
You've got to be fucking kidding me.

00:32:27.666 --> 00:32:30.041 align:center
Had he not lost his right testicle,

00:32:30.125 --> 00:32:33.333 align:center
the balance between logic and creativity
would have been held in check,

00:32:33.416 --> 00:32:36.333 align:center
and the world blessed
with the next da Vinci.

00:32:36.416 --> 00:32:42.041 align:center
Instead, what was sweet turned sour,
but no less creative.

00:32:42.125 --> 00:32:43.875 align:center
He still remained a brand genius.

00:32:44.416 --> 00:32:47.458 align:center
Think of the theater,
the pageantry of the Third Reich.

00:32:47.541 --> 00:32:50.958 align:center
The Hugo Boss uniforms,
the aesthetic construction of the Luger,

00:32:51.041 --> 00:32:53.125 align:center
the dynamic lines of the Messerschmitt.

00:32:53.208 --> 00:32:55.083 align:center
The ironic, iconic symbolism

00:32:55.166 --> 00:32:59.458 align:center
of the majestic eagle resting
upon the ancient Indian symbol for peace.

00:32:59.541 --> 00:33:03.208 align:center
And just as the acorn retains
the potential of the fully grown oak,

00:33:03.291 --> 00:33:07.250 align:center
I am now in possession of the genesis
of Hitler's creative genius.

00:33:07.333 --> 00:33:08.458 align:center
In his teste.

00:33:12.541 --> 00:33:14.625 align:center
I'm not sure
this is gonna work, Max.

00:33:14.708 --> 00:33:16.750 align:center
Susie, we're done here.

00:33:16.833 --> 00:33:18.500 align:center
Come on, Eddie, don't be a wuss.

00:33:18.583 --> 00:33:20.208 align:center
Let's not be too hasty, Edward.

00:33:20.291 --> 00:33:24.166 align:center
I don't care about his ideological
or his philosophical positions.

00:33:24.250 --> 00:33:26.458 align:center
I came to explore
a possible business venture,

00:33:26.541 --> 00:33:28.583 align:center
and whatever's floating around in that jar

00:33:28.666 --> 00:33:30.958 align:center
is gonna have
an impact on our negotiations.

00:33:31.041 --> 00:33:34.000 align:center
Now, this is
what's called leverage, Eddie.

00:33:34.083 --> 00:33:36.625 align:center
We have a special rate
for people like him.

00:33:36.708 --> 00:33:39.166 align:center
- What do you mean, people like me?
- Max!

00:33:39.250 --> 00:33:40.833 align:center
Can't let you do that, Frank.

00:33:40.916 --> 00:33:42.125 align:center
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

00:33:43.041 --> 00:33:44.583 align:center
Everyone, just calm down.

00:33:45.166 --> 00:33:48.541 align:center
I'm not gonna let anything jeopardize
my career. You have no fucking idea

00:33:48.625 --> 00:33:51.625 align:center
how hard I've had to work
to get into this position.

00:33:51.708 --> 00:33:53.666 align:center
I'm gonna be a fucking star!

00:34:03.958 --> 00:34:06.333 align:center
Got one body in the house
that needs disposing of

00:34:06.416 --> 00:34:10.375 align:center
and one somewhat unsympathetic gentleman
who requires your attention.

00:34:10.458 --> 00:34:11.666 align:center
What happened, boss?

00:34:11.750 --> 00:34:13.916 align:center
After a rather bizarre revelation...

00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:15.166 align:center
Nutball.

00:34:15.250 --> 00:34:17.791 align:center
<i>...negotiations took
an unexpected turn.</i>

00:34:23.166 --> 00:34:26.250 align:center
<i>There were some minor
disagreements about the deal structure.</i>

00:34:31.458 --> 00:34:35.500 align:center
<i>But Eddie here proved himself
remarkably capable at arbitration.</i>

00:34:36.500 --> 00:34:37.583 align:center
Oh fuck.

00:34:38.791 --> 00:34:41.041 align:center
<i>After the inevitable
to-ing and fro-ing,</i>

00:34:41.750 --> 00:34:44.208 align:center
<i>we managed to iron out terms that were...</i>

00:34:47.166 --> 00:34:48.875 align:center
<i>...acceptable to all parties.</i>

00:34:53.166 --> 00:34:54.583 align:center
<i>What do you want us to do?</i>

00:34:54.666 --> 00:34:57.583 align:center
Impress upon Lord Fuckhead
the details of our contract.

00:34:57.666 --> 00:35:01.458 align:center
Unless you have any objections,
Your Grace? I know he was a family friend.

00:35:01.541 --> 00:35:04.250 align:center
- No. Do your worst.
- What about him?

00:35:06.333 --> 00:35:07.666 align:center
- He'll be all right.
- Yeah.

00:35:08.708 --> 00:35:09.625 align:center
Come on, then.

00:35:10.708 --> 00:35:12.791 align:center
Easy. Easy. Easy, easy.

00:35:20.791 --> 00:35:24.000 align:center
My goodness, Edward.
You simply reek of formaldehyde.

00:35:24.791 --> 00:35:26.250 align:center
Where on earth have you been?

00:35:26.750 --> 00:35:30.500 align:center
And why are you drinking whiskey
first thing in the morning?

00:35:30.583 --> 00:35:32.458 align:center
The less said about that, the better.

00:35:32.541 --> 00:35:36.166 align:center
But, suffice to say, it's been, uh...
...a rather long night.

00:35:36.250 --> 00:35:42.500 align:center
Oh. Well, whilst you've been gadding about
doing God knows what,

00:35:43.125 --> 00:35:46.250 align:center
I have been finding solutions
to our current predicament.

00:35:47.416 --> 00:35:48.250 align:center
Right.

00:35:48.333 --> 00:35:51.666 align:center
I've found a new home
for your marijuana plantation.

00:35:51.750 --> 00:35:52.666 align:center
What?

00:35:52.750 --> 00:35:54.750 align:center
It's Mr. Rokes, darling.

00:35:56.916 --> 00:35:58.083 align:center
From next door.

00:35:58.166 --> 00:36:01.708 align:center
He's sitting on 2,000 acres
that he can't afford to keep,

00:36:01.791 --> 00:36:05.958 align:center
and he is longing to talk to someone
about a long-term lease.

00:36:10.333 --> 00:36:11.166 align:center
Well, well.

00:36:12.541 --> 00:36:16.125 align:center
You would not believe the things I've done
in the last 48 hours, Mother.

00:36:16.625 --> 00:36:20.541 align:center
And you come along
and... fix it all with a glass of sherry.

00:36:24.750 --> 00:36:28.041 align:center
I've got a lot of time for your mum.
Takes good care of herself.

00:36:28.125 --> 00:36:29.041 align:center
Good sense of humor.

00:36:29.125 --> 00:36:31.625 align:center
A little bit eccentric, but who isn't?

00:36:31.708 --> 00:36:34.666 align:center
Just a little. So are you gonna
talk to my neighbor, then?

00:36:35.875 --> 00:36:38.208 align:center
I'll take the meeting.
See if it's appropriate.

00:36:39.000 --> 00:36:41.333 align:center
At least someone did their due diligence.

00:36:42.125 --> 00:36:44.708 align:center
Despite the, uh, few minor niggles

00:36:44.791 --> 00:36:47.041 align:center
we might've come across
in the last couple of days,

00:36:47.875 --> 00:36:49.333 align:center
you actually came out on top.

00:36:51.708 --> 00:36:53.958 align:center
I don't appreciate being shot at, Edward.

00:36:54.041 --> 00:36:56.750 align:center
In fact,
and this may come as a shock to you,

00:36:56.833 --> 00:36:58.500 align:center
given my chosen career path,

00:36:58.583 --> 00:37:02.291 align:center
I actually make a point
of avoiding being shot at, at all times.

00:37:03.416 --> 00:37:04.458 align:center
Having said that,

00:37:04.541 --> 00:37:07.375 align:center
I will admit
you proved yourself useful in the end.

00:37:08.833 --> 00:37:10.125 align:center
Oi, oi, love birds.

00:37:11.541 --> 00:37:12.416 align:center
Don't mind me.

00:37:13.166 --> 00:37:14.375 align:center
Hello, mate.

00:37:14.458 --> 00:37:15.916 align:center
Fire in the hole.

00:37:18.375 --> 00:37:19.833 align:center
I've gotta get this straight,

00:37:20.583 --> 00:37:22.666 align:center
'cause Blanket was making no sense.

00:37:22.750 --> 00:37:26.083 align:center
According to him, you had a spin
on master chef over there

00:37:26.625 --> 00:37:28.583 align:center
and blew up a load of Nazis.

00:37:28.666 --> 00:37:30.083 align:center
With a fucking grenade.

00:37:30.708 --> 00:37:32.416 align:center
Nazi. Singular.

00:37:32.500 --> 00:37:35.791 align:center
Now we have a rare art collection
and two farms to set up.

00:37:35.875 --> 00:37:37.083 align:center
I take it all back.

00:37:37.625 --> 00:37:39.958 align:center
Suze, he's a proper G.

00:37:41.333 --> 00:37:42.791 align:center
You're a fucking idiot, Jack.

00:37:45.416 --> 00:37:48.416 align:center
To Eddie, the grand duke
of getting shit done.

00:37:48.500 --> 00:37:50.416 align:center
Hmm, no, no, no.
I'm not cheersing to that.

00:37:50.500 --> 00:37:51.500 align:center
All right.

00:37:51.583 --> 00:37:52.750 align:center
Why don't we cheers to

00:37:54.250 --> 00:37:55.458 align:center
looking in the envelope?

00:37:57.000 --> 00:37:58.250 align:center
To looking in the envelope.

00:37:58.750 --> 00:38:00.875 align:center
Whatever the fuck that means.