WEBVTT

00:00:30.697 --> 00:00:32.907 align:center
Oh my God, it's perfect!

00:00:33.408 --> 00:00:35.994 align:center
This is the deluxe arch.
Can you believe how cute it is?

00:00:36.077 --> 00:00:36.911 align:center
It's gorgeous.

00:00:36.995 --> 00:00:38.538 align:center
-So deluxe.
-What a rental, yeah.

00:00:38.621 --> 00:00:39.998 align:center
It cost a bit more, but I figured,

00:00:40.081 --> 00:00:42.208 align:center
how often do you get to celebrate
25 years of marriage?

00:00:42.292 --> 00:00:43.793 align:center
Sometimes never, right?

00:00:43.877 --> 00:00:45.336 align:center
-Yeah.
-A little to the left.

00:00:45.420 --> 00:00:47.672 align:center
Can you just eyeball,
make sure it's straight?

00:00:47.756 --> 00:00:49.174 align:center
Sorry, I'm nitpicky. I'm nitpicking.

00:00:49.257 --> 00:00:54.179 align:center
So, uh, what made you want to surprise
Nick with, you know, this whole fun thing?

00:00:54.262 --> 00:00:56.264 align:center
I don't know, I just wanted
to do something special.

00:00:56.347 --> 00:00:58.892 align:center
I mean, the man bought me a kiln.
He installed it himself.

00:00:59.476 --> 00:01:04.564 align:center
So, I woke up this morning,
and I fired it up for the first time.

00:01:05.231 --> 00:01:06.483 align:center
It's a wedding platter.

00:01:06.566 --> 00:01:09.861 align:center
The one we got years ago broke,
so I did that from memory.

00:01:11.279 --> 00:01:16.076 align:center
Well, what a memory
today also will, uh, be.

00:01:16.159 --> 00:01:16.993 align:center
Yeah.

00:01:17.577 --> 00:01:19.829 align:center
-Annie, what do you need from us?
-Great question.

00:01:19.913 --> 00:01:22.624 align:center
Uh, the fancy clothes that
I asked you to bring, they're for this.

00:01:22.707 --> 00:01:24.793 align:center
So go put them on,
and you can help me set up the ceremony.

00:01:24.876 --> 00:01:28.338 align:center
But Nick won't be back for two hours,
and then it's just, you know,

00:01:28.421 --> 00:01:31.841 align:center
surprise, vows, cake,
and happily ever after.

00:01:31.925 --> 00:01:34.052 align:center
Amazing plan. No notes. Get it, girl.

00:01:35.762 --> 00:01:38.098 align:center
I hate this. I hate talking like this.
I wanna leave.

00:01:38.181 --> 00:01:39.891 align:center
Jack, you were acting insane.

00:01:39.974 --> 00:01:43.061 align:center
Yeah, how can you be even less chill
in your fifties than in your twenties?

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She made her marriage
a tombstone, all right?

00:01:46.356 --> 00:01:48.024 align:center
I think we need to tell her.

00:01:48.107 --> 00:01:50.235 align:center
-Absolutely not doing that.
-Absolutely no.

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-Why?
-'Cause you're not thinking it through.

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What, are we gonna divorce Anne for Nick?
How would we do that?

00:01:55.698 --> 00:01:57.116 align:center
We… Gently.

00:01:57.200 --> 00:02:00.036 align:center
Vow renewals are dumb and tacky,
but they're not real.

00:02:00.119 --> 00:02:01.788 align:center
So, the six of us will sit here

00:02:01.871 --> 00:02:04.165 align:center
and uncomfortably watch
this little ceremony,

00:02:04.249 --> 00:02:05.416 align:center
and that will be that.

00:02:08.837 --> 00:02:10.004 align:center
Oh, Jesus.

00:02:13.925 --> 00:02:15.552 align:center
It's a zombie apocalypse.

00:02:16.177 --> 00:02:17.929 align:center
Anne invited everyone she knows.

00:02:19.722 --> 00:02:21.516 align:center
It's going to be a big party!

00:02:25.019 --> 00:02:28.565 align:center
Hi, I'm Claude. Hi. Hi.

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Thanks.

00:02:49.752 --> 00:02:51.504 align:center
Jack, it's gonna be okay.

00:02:51.588 --> 00:02:54.090 align:center
It's not that. Can you--
Can you feel my glands?

00:02:54.674 --> 00:02:55.550 align:center
Please.

00:02:57.302 --> 00:02:59.137 align:center
Just feels like normal neck.

00:02:59.220 --> 00:03:01.347 align:center
I just feel, like, off.

00:03:01.431 --> 00:03:04.934 align:center
-You know, not like sick, but like, funky.
-Uh-huh.

00:03:05.018 --> 00:03:07.270 align:center
I mean, I swallowed
lake water yesterday, and…

00:03:07.353 --> 00:03:10.940 align:center
-You don't think I have giardia, do you?
-I think you're just stressed, buddy.

00:03:11.024 --> 00:03:14.694 align:center
Look, my thumb joints
are, like, crazy tender.

00:03:14.777 --> 00:03:15.737 align:center
You see this? Look.

00:03:16.613 --> 00:03:17.989 align:center
Just doing that hurts.

00:03:18.072 --> 00:03:19.157 align:center
So bad.

00:03:19.657 --> 00:03:21.576 align:center
I can't believe that Nick is doing this.

00:03:21.659 --> 00:03:24.287 align:center
He just wants to be happy.
I'm sure it's not easy for him either.

00:03:24.370 --> 00:03:26.039 align:center
Wait, why are you on Nick's side?

00:03:26.122 --> 00:03:27.749 align:center
No, I'm not taking a side.

00:03:27.832 --> 00:03:31.336 align:center
I just think we should focus
on the actual situation

00:03:31.419 --> 00:03:34.255 align:center
and not give in
to a bunch of big feelings.

00:03:34.339 --> 00:03:37.300 align:center
Oh, well, sorry I have big feelings.

00:03:37.383 --> 00:03:40.595 align:center
I actually didn't
'til you said "big feelings" like that.

00:03:41.179 --> 00:03:43.348 align:center
Look, you're not feeling well, okay?

00:03:43.431 --> 00:03:47.435 align:center
Why don't you eat a banana and lay down?
And I'll go help downstairs.

00:03:48.561 --> 00:03:50.897 align:center
You're… You're not gonna be mad
if I lie down?

00:03:50.980 --> 00:03:51.856 align:center
No.

00:03:52.482 --> 00:03:53.316 align:center
Thank you.

00:03:58.571 --> 00:04:01.157 align:center
Is… Is this the only banana you have?

00:04:01.241 --> 00:04:02.075 align:center
Yeah.

00:04:04.494 --> 00:04:08.539 align:center
You're positive we shouldn't call Nick
and tell him what's happening?

00:04:13.962 --> 00:04:16.631 align:center
Hello, you've reached
the voicemail of Nick Pagano.

00:04:16.714 --> 00:04:18.257 align:center
-Please leave a message.
-Voicemail.

00:04:18.341 --> 00:04:20.802 align:center
And if you wish to send a fax,
you may do so on this line at any time.

00:04:20.885 --> 00:04:22.679 align:center
Thanks, have a great day.

00:04:22.762 --> 00:04:25.139 align:center
Hi, Nick, it's Kate.
When was the last time you got a fax?

00:04:25.223 --> 00:04:28.268 align:center
Also, Anne is throwing you
a surprise vow renewal,

00:04:28.351 --> 00:04:30.937 align:center
which, given where your head is at,
may be an issue.

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Please call me back.

00:04:33.856 --> 00:04:34.774 align:center
Thank you.

00:04:35.608 --> 00:04:38.528 align:center
If there are other bananas down there,
can you text me?

00:04:40.697 --> 00:04:41.531 align:center
Yeah.

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Thank you, Janessa.
That is all. Yes, that's great.

00:04:46.411 --> 00:04:48.413 align:center
Yeah. Yeah, you're an angel from heaven.

00:04:48.496 --> 00:04:50.373 align:center
Ciao, ciao, ciao.

00:04:51.416 --> 00:04:52.625 align:center
Yeah, okay.

00:04:54.377 --> 00:04:57.296 align:center
-Janessa, you fucking bitch!
-Everything okay?

00:04:57.380 --> 00:05:00.800 align:center
No. I got locked out of the portal,
so I called the number.

00:05:00.883 --> 00:05:03.803 align:center
I'm on hold for 45 minutes.
Finally, I get Janessa on the phone.

00:05:03.886 --> 00:05:06.222 align:center
She says she's fixed it.
Look, does it look fixed to you?

00:05:06.306 --> 00:05:08.766 align:center
Maybe it's a sign
we don't worry about it this second.

00:05:08.850 --> 00:05:10.685 align:center
This is not a sign, Danny.

00:05:10.768 --> 00:05:11.811 align:center
Thunder, volcano,

00:05:11.894 --> 00:05:14.731 align:center
when a fish looks at you right in the eye
for no reason, these are signs.

00:05:14.814 --> 00:05:18.026 align:center
This? This is a fixable problem,
and I'm going to fix it.

00:05:18.109 --> 00:05:19.986 align:center
Okay, just breathe, okay?

00:05:21.863 --> 00:05:24.782 align:center
You sure you cannot stay home
and keep the appointment?

00:05:24.866 --> 00:05:26.325 align:center
Get the surgery over with?

00:05:26.409 --> 00:05:29.120 align:center
Miami's a big project.
I can't miss the installation.

00:05:31.956 --> 00:05:33.916 align:center
And you can't do it from home,
with a Zoom?

00:05:35.168 --> 00:05:38.171 align:center
You know I need to be there in person
to see all the furniture

00:05:38.254 --> 00:05:39.380 align:center
and touch all the fabrics.

00:05:39.464 --> 00:05:41.716 align:center
Why do you have to be
so tactile all the time?

00:05:42.216 --> 00:05:44.385 align:center
I mean, it's sexy,
but also a little frustrating.

00:05:44.469 --> 00:05:46.179 align:center
Okay, all I want right now

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is to be on vacation
with my beautiful husband.

00:05:49.849 --> 00:05:52.477 align:center
-Now you do that voice, huh?
-Mm-hmm.

00:05:52.560 --> 00:05:56.272 align:center
You know, you can say anything,
and I melt with that voice, right?

00:05:56.356 --> 00:05:58.232 align:center
-Cafeteria.
-Oh, God.

00:05:59.233 --> 00:06:00.568 align:center
Trash compactor.

00:06:00.651 --> 00:06:01.986 align:center
Ah!

00:06:02.070 --> 00:06:02.987 align:center
More!

00:06:05.448 --> 00:06:06.449 align:center
Janessa.

00:06:06.991 --> 00:06:08.451 align:center
I love Janessa.

00:06:11.621 --> 00:06:13.915 align:center
Basta. Oh, I'll do this later.

00:06:13.998 --> 00:06:17.335 align:center
Now I need to get ready
for Nick and Anne's big day.

00:06:18.461 --> 00:06:19.504 align:center
Oh.

00:06:21.672 --> 00:06:23.216 align:center
-What?
-Yeah.

00:06:35.686 --> 00:06:37.146 align:center
Oh, God. Dang it.

00:06:37.230 --> 00:06:38.356 align:center
Oh, you need help?

00:06:38.439 --> 00:06:39.732 align:center
Oh, that would be great.

00:06:39.816 --> 00:06:42.485 align:center
Make sure you lift it with your knees.

00:06:44.112 --> 00:06:47.115 align:center
Up, and back, back.

00:06:47.198 --> 00:06:50.493 align:center
A little bit more to your left.
Back, back, back. Watch your step.

00:06:50.576 --> 00:06:52.995 align:center
Yes, you can open the door.

00:06:53.079 --> 00:06:55.123 align:center
-Claude, question.
-Yes.

00:06:55.206 --> 00:06:58.584 align:center
Is there any way you'd be willing
to sing at the ceremony?

00:06:58.668 --> 00:06:59.919 align:center
Anne!

00:07:00.002 --> 00:07:01.629 align:center
That is so personal.

00:07:01.712 --> 00:07:03.047 align:center
I would be very honored.

00:07:03.131 --> 00:07:05.174 align:center
Oh, good because, um,

00:07:05.258 --> 00:07:07.677 align:center
you know that beautiful song
that you always sing at karaoke?

00:07:07.760 --> 00:07:10.179 align:center
-The ballad, the one in Italian?
-No, no, no, no.

00:07:10.263 --> 00:07:12.515 align:center
That song is about orphans in a famine,
I cannot sing that.

00:07:12.598 --> 00:07:15.268 align:center
-Oh.
-I know your wedding song. How's that?

00:07:15.351 --> 00:07:17.228 align:center
Perfect. Thank you.

00:07:19.397 --> 00:07:20.815 align:center
This is gonna be so special!

00:07:22.024 --> 00:07:22.859 align:center
Yes.

00:07:42.253 --> 00:07:43.087 align:center
Yeah, come in.

00:07:43.171 --> 00:07:44.839 align:center
Hey, Jack. Sorry to barge--

00:07:44.922 --> 00:07:46.841 align:center
Oh, no. Are you not feeling well?

00:07:46.924 --> 00:07:48.926 align:center
Oh! No, no, no. Not at all. Not at all.

00:07:49.010 --> 00:07:51.053 align:center
I'm, uh, just resting up for,

00:07:51.137 --> 00:07:52.805 align:center
uh, later, later.

00:07:52.889 --> 00:07:54.807 align:center
Um, do you need something?

00:07:54.891 --> 00:07:57.518 align:center
Yeah, just the full-length mirror
for a minute, if you don't mind.

00:07:57.602 --> 00:07:58.853 align:center
It's the only one in the house.

00:07:58.936 --> 00:08:00.771 align:center
Oh my God, of course. Please.

00:08:00.855 --> 00:08:01.731 align:center
Please, yeah.

00:08:01.814 --> 00:08:04.317 align:center
-Sorry, just real quick.
-Go ahead, and…

00:08:05.359 --> 00:08:07.069 align:center
That's, uh,

00:08:07.153 --> 00:08:08.946 align:center
an amazing, amazing dress.

00:08:09.906 --> 00:08:12.658 align:center
This is annoying,
but I need help with my hair.

00:08:12.742 --> 00:08:13.868 align:center
I can't see the back.

00:08:13.951 --> 00:08:15.161 align:center
Oh, of course. Yeah, of course.

00:08:15.244 --> 00:08:19.624 align:center
If you just put
some of the pieces on the side.

00:08:20.208 --> 00:08:22.335 align:center
I don't know. Whatever looks nice.

00:08:22.418 --> 00:08:23.252 align:center
Okay.

00:08:25.338 --> 00:08:28.216 align:center
I had baby's breath in my hair
on our wedding day.

00:08:29.717 --> 00:08:32.345 align:center
You look… beautiful.

00:08:35.723 --> 00:08:37.767 align:center
I can't wait to see Nick's face.

00:08:43.231 --> 00:08:45.608 align:center
Are you hiding?
Where'd you get that sandwich?

00:08:45.691 --> 00:08:46.526 align:center
I made it.

00:08:47.026 --> 00:08:49.612 align:center
This catering is for Barbies.
How's Jack holding up?

00:08:49.695 --> 00:08:53.157 align:center
Oh no, he's not. No, this whole thing
is giving him emotional giardia.

00:08:53.241 --> 00:08:54.242 align:center
Hmm!

00:08:54.325 --> 00:08:56.953 align:center
I noticed that Claude
is very excited about the ceremony.

00:08:57.536 --> 00:09:00.248 align:center
Don't judge me.
If I told him about Nick and Anne,

00:09:00.331 --> 00:09:02.625 align:center
he wouldn't just take to a fainting couch,
he would explode.

00:09:03.251 --> 00:09:05.503 align:center
That is why sometimes,
I need to manage him a little.

00:09:05.586 --> 00:09:07.505 align:center
-I get it.
-It's just easier that way.

00:09:07.588 --> 00:09:09.757 align:center
I mean, it's not like you're straight-up
lying to him or anything.

00:09:12.718 --> 00:09:15.179 align:center
-What?
-Okay, um…

00:09:15.263 --> 00:09:16.264 align:center
Well, I…

00:09:16.347 --> 00:09:17.974 align:center
I didn't lie,

00:09:18.057 --> 00:09:21.686 align:center
but I kind of lightly fabricated
that I need to be out of town

00:09:21.769 --> 00:09:24.063 align:center
for work next week
instead of doing that surgery.

00:09:24.146 --> 00:09:25.231 align:center
I know! I know!

00:09:25.314 --> 00:09:27.108 align:center
God, your face gets so loud sometimes!

00:09:28.192 --> 00:09:30.111 align:center
But you are gonna get that surgery.

00:09:30.194 --> 00:09:34.240 align:center
I need a minute to think about it before
Claude loses his beautiful Italian mind.

00:09:34.323 --> 00:09:36.284 align:center
That is the only way I get my minute.

00:09:37.076 --> 00:09:38.035 align:center
But you are gonna--

00:09:38.119 --> 00:09:41.622 align:center
It's a balloon that they shove in
through your groin, Katherine.

00:09:41.706 --> 00:09:44.041 align:center
They jam a balloon through your groin.

00:09:44.125 --> 00:09:45.293 align:center
That sounds awful.

00:09:46.502 --> 00:09:49.755 align:center
-But you're gonna let them jam it, right?
-Bitch, will you let me eat my sandwich?

00:09:50.881 --> 00:09:52.717 align:center
We are monsters.

00:09:53.301 --> 00:09:54.927 align:center
All of us, monsters.

00:09:55.011 --> 00:09:57.471 align:center
All right, Anne is gonna be blindsided

00:09:57.555 --> 00:10:00.766 align:center
in front of her dad
and her old youth pastor from Utica.

00:10:00.850 --> 00:10:03.477 align:center
And we're just sitting on our hands,
letting it happen.

00:10:03.561 --> 00:10:04.812 align:center
Okay.

00:10:04.895 --> 00:10:07.189 align:center
-He still hasn't called you back yet?
-No.

00:10:07.273 --> 00:10:08.983 align:center
Great, he hasn't called me back either.

00:10:09.066 --> 00:10:10.067 align:center
Wait, you called him too?

00:10:10.151 --> 00:10:12.445 align:center
-A little, yeah.
-Okay, I also called him.

00:10:12.528 --> 00:10:15.865 align:center
So we all called him?
Well, then we know what happened.

00:10:15.948 --> 00:10:19.160 align:center
Obviously, he got
a billion panicked voicemails,

00:10:19.243 --> 00:10:20.703 align:center
and he freaked out and ran away.

00:10:20.786 --> 00:10:22.288 align:center
No, he would not just run away.

00:10:22.371 --> 00:10:25.249 align:center
-That's what I would do.
-That's what you would do, huh?

00:10:25.333 --> 00:10:28.252 align:center
You would abandon me
while I threw you a vow renewal party?

00:10:28.336 --> 00:10:29.629 align:center
That's not what I meant.

00:10:29.712 --> 00:10:31.881 align:center
Okay, you know what?
Fuck it. I'm telling Anne.

00:10:31.964 --> 00:10:35.134 align:center
-Jack, no, you have not thought this--
-I'm telling Anne!

00:10:53.819 --> 00:10:56.489 align:center
-There you are. Stop hiding.
-No.

00:10:56.572 --> 00:11:00.785 align:center
Jack has been talking to Anne for a while.
Nick is now a thousand minutes late.

00:11:00.868 --> 00:11:02.912 align:center
I mean, should we start subtly
telling people to go home?

00:11:02.995 --> 00:11:06.040 align:center
-I'm not doing that. I live in here now.
-Mind if I use the good bathroom?

00:11:06.123 --> 00:11:07.917 align:center
-Oh, hey.
-Oh, Don. Hi.

00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:10.836 align:center
Mr. K, you came all the way
from Florida for this?

00:11:10.920 --> 00:11:12.838 align:center
Well, your daughter only gets married…

00:11:13.339 --> 00:11:14.548 align:center
a bunch of times, I guess.

00:11:14.632 --> 00:11:16.175 align:center
You know, Anne's mother

00:11:16.258 --> 00:11:17.593 align:center
would have really loved this.

00:11:17.677 --> 00:11:19.762 align:center
-Yeah.
-She loved outdoor parties.

00:11:19.845 --> 00:11:21.347 align:center
You were together for a long time.

00:11:21.430 --> 00:11:23.557 align:center
Sixty-seven wonderful years.

00:11:23.641 --> 00:11:24.767 align:center
You got any tips?

00:11:24.850 --> 00:11:27.228 align:center
I don't know. You know, communication.

00:11:27.311 --> 00:11:29.605 align:center
Try not to fuss about the small stuff.

00:11:30.272 --> 00:11:32.525 align:center
But my wife did have this one thing. She…

00:11:32.608 --> 00:11:34.610 align:center
-She…
-Tell me.

00:11:34.694 --> 00:11:37.279 align:center
She'd… She'd kill me if I told you.

00:11:37.363 --> 00:11:39.990 align:center
But every once in a while,
we'd wake up and she'd say,

00:11:40.074 --> 00:11:43.369 align:center
"Congratulations.
Take off your pants. It's a sex day."

00:11:43.452 --> 00:11:44.662 align:center
That's incredible!

00:11:44.745 --> 00:11:48.374 align:center
You might try that with your spouse.
They'd be so grateful and surprised.

00:11:48.457 --> 00:11:51.043 align:center
You know, it's like a dog waking up
not knowing it's Thanksgiving.

00:11:51.127 --> 00:11:53.295 align:center
And then all of a sudden,
all these people come over,

00:11:53.379 --> 00:11:56.132 align:center
start dropping turkey
and stuffing all over the ground.

00:11:56.215 --> 00:11:57.633 align:center
I love you so much.

00:11:58.175 --> 00:11:59.343 align:center
-Oh.
-Mwah!

00:11:59.427 --> 00:12:01.887 align:center
-This is gonna be a memorable day.
-Yeah.

00:12:01.971 --> 00:12:04.598 align:center
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I had real coffee this morning.

00:12:04.682 --> 00:12:07.101 align:center
Yeah, we will give you your privacy. Okay.

00:12:11.397 --> 00:12:14.316 align:center
You sure you don't want to let Claude in
on what's happening?

00:12:14.400 --> 00:12:18.612 align:center
Right. Because a hysterical man is exactly
what this party needs right now.

00:12:18.696 --> 00:12:21.073 align:center
You're keeping all these things from him.

00:12:22.491 --> 00:12:24.910 align:center
You know what, Katherine? You're right.

00:12:24.994 --> 00:12:27.079 align:center
Let's tell him. Let's see how that goes.

00:12:27.163 --> 00:12:29.290 align:center
No, not with me.
No, I don't have to tell him anything.

00:12:29.373 --> 00:12:31.625 align:center
…from the tempo,
the key's there, but we're not--

00:12:31.709 --> 00:12:33.085 align:center
-Hey, honey.
-Claude.

00:12:33.169 --> 00:12:35.588 align:center
Hey, we need to talk to you for a moment.

00:12:38.090 --> 00:12:39.133 align:center
What happened?

00:12:39.216 --> 00:12:40.092 align:center
Uh…

00:12:41.010 --> 00:12:42.595 align:center
We're worried about how today may go.

00:12:43.387 --> 00:12:44.221 align:center
You see,

00:12:45.973 --> 00:12:49.852 align:center
Nick told us that he's thinking
about leaving Anne, and she doesn't know.

00:12:54.356 --> 00:12:55.191 align:center
Oh, well.

00:12:56.776 --> 00:12:57.610 align:center
"Oh, well"?

00:12:57.693 --> 00:13:00.237 align:center
Oh, well. I mean,
people say things all the time,

00:13:00.321 --> 00:13:02.281 align:center
but who knows what they will really do.

00:13:02.865 --> 00:13:05.451 align:center
You know, I'm going to cross my fingers

00:13:05.534 --> 00:13:08.913 align:center
and hope that love will find its way
into his heart again.

00:13:08.996 --> 00:13:10.039 align:center
How's that?

00:13:10.790 --> 00:13:12.374 align:center
I'd better go warm up now. Ciao.

00:13:18.172 --> 00:13:19.006 align:center
Okay.

00:13:20.758 --> 00:13:21.592 align:center
Okay.

00:13:25.721 --> 00:13:26.555 align:center
Katherine.

00:13:36.565 --> 00:13:38.150 align:center
Oh, hi. How are you?

00:13:38.234 --> 00:13:39.527 align:center
-Hey.
-Hey!

00:13:39.610 --> 00:13:41.820 align:center
Yeah, so, uh, I talked to Anne.

00:13:41.904 --> 00:13:42.988 align:center
Okay.

00:13:43.072 --> 00:13:48.744 align:center
Yeah, and I-I went in just thinking,
you know, like, I'll be loving but firm.

00:13:49.829 --> 00:13:50.663 align:center
Okay.

00:13:50.746 --> 00:13:51.622 align:center
And…

00:13:52.164 --> 00:13:53.165 align:center
I couldn't do it.

00:13:53.249 --> 00:13:55.960 align:center
I mean, I-I-I couldn't do it.

00:13:56.043 --> 00:13:58.838 align:center
Like, I got emotional seeing her, right?

00:13:58.921 --> 00:14:00.422 align:center
And I think my voice cracked,

00:14:00.506 --> 00:14:03.884 align:center
and I just ended up saying,
"I love you," like, 11 times.

00:14:03.968 --> 00:14:08.138 align:center
And by the time I left,
I had gone completely the other way.

00:14:08.222 --> 00:14:11.058 align:center
Right? And now I've got to do
a reading at the ceremony

00:14:11.141 --> 00:14:13.477 align:center
of "When Two People Are at One"
from the I Ching.

00:14:14.311 --> 00:14:17.481 align:center
Oh, Jack, you only tried
to do what you thought was right.

00:14:18.232 --> 00:14:21.569 align:center
-But I do think that this kind of proves--
-No, no, uh, Kate.

00:14:21.652 --> 00:14:24.196 align:center
You know, at some point,
Anne's like, you know,

00:14:24.280 --> 00:14:26.740 align:center
"Jack, is there something else
you want to tell me?"

00:14:26.824 --> 00:14:28.993 align:center
-Because she could sense it, right?
-Yeah.

00:14:29.076 --> 00:14:35.875 align:center
And, uh, you know, I said, no,
I don't have anything else to tell her.

00:14:38.127 --> 00:14:41.297 align:center
But I, you know, I said, uh…

00:14:43.507 --> 00:14:44.341 align:center
you…

00:14:45.801 --> 00:14:46.677 align:center
did.

00:14:49.179 --> 00:14:50.014 align:center
What?

00:14:50.097 --> 00:14:53.267 align:center
I know. I'm sorry.
I sucked. I'm bad. I panicked.

00:14:53.350 --> 00:14:56.770 align:center
I just thought, in the moment,
you'd be so much better at thi--

00:15:05.279 --> 00:15:06.530 align:center
Oh, man.

00:15:14.204 --> 00:15:15.205 align:center
Oh, hey, you.

00:15:15.289 --> 00:15:16.290 align:center
Hey.

00:15:16.373 --> 00:15:19.126 align:center
What are you doing in here? It's hot.

00:15:19.209 --> 00:15:22.713 align:center
The kiln heat is good for my voice

00:15:22.796 --> 00:15:26.008 align:center
Okay, well,
can I, uh, interrupt you for a minute?

00:15:26.091 --> 00:15:27.635 align:center
Of course, amore. What's up?

00:15:29.219 --> 00:15:30.512 align:center
Claude.

00:15:31.388 --> 00:15:32.431 align:center
Honey.

00:15:33.641 --> 00:15:35.768 align:center
I didn't really have to go to Miami.

00:15:36.685 --> 00:15:38.771 align:center
What? So you lied to me?

00:15:38.854 --> 00:15:39.772 align:center
No.

00:15:40.981 --> 00:15:42.900 align:center
Yes, I-- But lately,

00:15:43.484 --> 00:15:46.820 align:center
it doesn't seem like you and I
could have a conversation about…

00:15:46.904 --> 00:15:47.905 align:center
-Conversation?
-…surgery.

00:15:47.988 --> 00:15:49.615 align:center
What kind of conversation
do we need to have?

00:15:49.698 --> 00:15:51.659 align:center
Whether I really need to have it or not.

00:15:51.742 --> 00:15:52.993 align:center
-Are you crazy?
-Oh, my God!

00:15:53.077 --> 00:15:55.162 align:center
You don't want to get the surgery now?

00:15:55.245 --> 00:15:58.165 align:center
The doctor said that maybe
with diet and exercise, that maybe I--

00:15:58.248 --> 00:15:59.291 align:center
Oh sure, sure, sure.

00:15:59.375 --> 00:16:01.835 align:center
Why don't you just chew some gum
and make a wish?

00:16:02.962 --> 00:16:04.964 align:center
I see you now. I know what you're doing.

00:16:05.047 --> 00:16:06.548 align:center
-What?
-That was always your plan.

00:16:06.632 --> 00:16:09.093 align:center
You thought you could push the date
until I forgot about it.

00:16:09.176 --> 00:16:12.596 align:center
Well, guess what? This is not
like getting our matching tattoos.

00:16:12.680 --> 00:16:15.557 align:center
You always do this. You always
bullshit me to get what you want.

00:16:15.641 --> 00:16:17.559 align:center
No. I don't. Can we please
do this somewhere else?

00:16:17.643 --> 00:16:18.936 align:center
It's hot as fuck in here.

00:16:19.019 --> 00:16:19.853 align:center
Just…

00:16:20.354 --> 00:16:21.814 align:center
I don't understand.

00:16:21.897 --> 00:16:25.401 align:center
There is a thing that you can do
to take care of this thing,

00:16:25.484 --> 00:16:26.777 align:center
and you don't do it.

00:16:27.444 --> 00:16:28.862 align:center
Not even for us.

00:16:33.242 --> 00:16:34.076 align:center
Fine.

00:16:36.245 --> 00:16:37.162 align:center
Fine.

00:16:37.788 --> 00:16:39.039 align:center
I'll get it done.

00:16:39.123 --> 00:16:40.165 align:center
Really?

00:16:41.166 --> 00:16:42.918 align:center
-Or that's another lie?
-No.

00:16:43.919 --> 00:16:44.795 align:center
Next week.

00:16:46.463 --> 00:16:47.881 align:center
I'll get the surgery.

00:16:50.676 --> 00:16:56.390 align:center
But I reject the narrative
that I lie to you to get what I want.

00:16:57.558 --> 00:16:59.601 align:center
Sometimes I just need a minute.

00:17:02.354 --> 00:17:03.188 align:center
Okay.

00:17:04.314 --> 00:17:05.149 align:center
Okay.

00:17:09.528 --> 00:17:10.362 align:center
Okay.

00:17:21.457 --> 00:17:22.833 align:center
Oh, hey, Kate.

00:17:23.417 --> 00:17:25.502 align:center
-Oh, Lila! Oh!
-Hey!

00:17:25.586 --> 00:17:27.713 align:center
Hi! how are you?

00:17:27.796 --> 00:17:30.340 align:center
Can you believe my mom did all this?

00:17:30.424 --> 00:17:32.509 align:center
God, she is so extra.

00:17:32.593 --> 00:17:35.179 align:center
Okay, you know, go easy on her. She's…

00:17:35.262 --> 00:17:36.180 align:center
A triple Pisces?

00:17:36.263 --> 00:17:38.891 align:center
She's your mom, and she loves your dad.

00:17:38.974 --> 00:17:39.808 align:center
I know.

00:17:40.309 --> 00:17:43.479 align:center
I'm sure once it's actually happening,
it won't be embarrassing.

00:17:46.315 --> 00:17:47.858 align:center
-I'm gonna go check on her.
-Okay.

00:17:56.825 --> 00:17:57.659 align:center
Come in.

00:18:01.622 --> 00:18:03.165 align:center
Oh, wow!

00:18:03.248 --> 00:18:04.792 align:center
You look great.

00:18:06.168 --> 00:18:07.377 align:center
How do you feel?

00:18:07.461 --> 00:18:10.255 align:center
Well, I fit into this dress today,
so I'm starving.

00:18:12.925 --> 00:18:15.344 align:center
-Have you heard from Nick?
-No, which is very Nick of him.

00:18:15.427 --> 00:18:17.054 align:center
But I'm sure he'll text soon.

00:18:17.930 --> 00:18:21.141 align:center
-Uh, so, I know… Jack mentioned that--
-It's loud out there.

00:18:21.225 --> 00:18:22.935 align:center
You think people are having fun?

00:18:23.018 --> 00:18:24.353 align:center
I do, yeah.

00:18:24.436 --> 00:18:26.939 align:center
Um, Anne, can we sit for a second?

00:18:27.022 --> 00:18:29.149 align:center
Uh, depends on if you want
to see me naked.

00:18:29.233 --> 00:18:31.401 align:center
If I sit in this dress,
it'll explode right off me.

00:18:35.906 --> 00:18:36.740 align:center
Um…

00:18:38.117 --> 00:18:40.661 align:center
Anne, you and I have known
each other for a very long time.

00:18:40.744 --> 00:18:41.870 align:center
Yeah.

00:18:42.454 --> 00:18:44.331 align:center
And I love you so much.

00:18:44.414 --> 00:18:46.708 align:center
-I hope he's not having car trouble.
-What?

00:18:47.501 --> 00:18:51.129 align:center
Yeah, because you know when he's out here,
he drives that old BMW.

00:18:51.213 --> 00:18:53.799 align:center
The, what'd you use to call it?
The almost red one?

00:18:53.882 --> 00:18:54.967 align:center
Sure.

00:18:56.552 --> 00:18:57.719 align:center
Yeah, it's funny, when…

00:18:58.554 --> 00:19:00.931 align:center
when Nick turned 50, he was like,
"You know what, Anne?"

00:19:01.014 --> 00:19:04.184 align:center
"I make good money.
I'm gonna treat myself to a new car."

00:19:04.768 --> 00:19:07.896 align:center
And he went on this endless quest
for a new car, right?

00:19:07.980 --> 00:19:10.607 align:center
Every week was a new website
or a new conversation.

00:19:11.358 --> 00:19:15.445 align:center
He spent two years test-driving
a dozen cars, maybe more.

00:19:16.363 --> 00:19:17.781 align:center
But for whatever reason,

00:19:19.074 --> 00:19:21.243 align:center
he keeps coming back to that old BMW.

00:19:22.744 --> 00:19:25.455 align:center
Because he loves it.

00:19:30.544 --> 00:19:33.172 align:center
At work, he's really decisive, but…

00:19:34.131 --> 00:19:36.175 align:center
well, in life, he just…

00:19:37.634 --> 00:19:41.013 align:center
You know,
sometimes he doesn't exactly know.

00:19:44.308 --> 00:19:46.476 align:center
It's Nick. Five minutes away.

00:19:48.562 --> 00:19:51.148 align:center
Okay, do-- Should I get
everyone in their seats?

00:19:51.231 --> 00:19:53.317 align:center
-That'd be amazing.
-Okay. Okay.

00:19:55.068 --> 00:19:56.069 align:center
Thank you.

00:19:56.737 --> 00:19:57.738 align:center
Yeah.

00:19:57.821 --> 00:19:59.573 align:center
For, you know, just thank you.

00:20:15.255 --> 00:20:17.382 align:center
Uh, if I could have
everybody's attention, please.

00:20:17.466 --> 00:20:18.967 align:center
Nick is five minutes away,

00:20:19.051 --> 00:20:21.970 align:center
so everyone should take their seats
for the surprise.

00:20:29.770 --> 00:20:32.231 align:center
Uh, I talked to Anne, kind of.

00:20:33.106 --> 00:20:35.442 align:center
And you should know, she already…

00:20:37.527 --> 00:20:40.113 align:center
She's not gonna be blindsided today,
if that helps.

00:20:41.114 --> 00:20:43.075 align:center
Oh, man, so… so all this…

00:20:43.158 --> 00:20:44.034 align:center
Yeah.

00:20:44.117 --> 00:20:46.828 align:center
-Because she's trying to…
-I think so, yeah.

00:20:47.579 --> 00:20:48.747 align:center
Must have been hard.

00:20:51.792 --> 00:20:53.835 align:center
Well, whatever happened,

00:20:54.544 --> 00:20:56.672 align:center
I think I would have
been really bad at it.

00:20:57.422 --> 00:21:01.218 align:center
No, you would have been nice.
You would have said a hug somehow.

00:21:01.301 --> 00:21:03.845 align:center
No, I would have fallen apart,
I would've cried,

00:21:03.929 --> 00:21:08.058 align:center
I would have thrown up
and offered to buy her like a… a horse.

00:21:09.685 --> 00:21:11.645 align:center
Oh God, poor Anne.

00:21:17.985 --> 00:21:20.153 align:center
Promise me that we will keep talking

00:21:20.237 --> 00:21:23.115 align:center
so that nobody feels like
they have to pull any crazy shit

00:21:23.198 --> 00:21:25.200 align:center
to keep the other one from running away.

00:21:25.283 --> 00:21:26.201 align:center
I promise.

00:21:27.536 --> 00:21:30.664 align:center
I can kind of promise anything
because I'll be dead from giardia soon.

00:21:51.476 --> 00:21:52.853 align:center
Shh! He's coming.

00:22:06.241 --> 00:22:08.452 align:center
Surprise! We're renewing our vows!

00:22:17.961 --> 00:22:20.088 align:center
I guess I should have brought more bagels!

00:22:22.341 --> 00:22:23.967 align:center
Wow, hey, everybody.

00:22:24.051 --> 00:22:24.885 align:center
Hey.

00:22:26.970 --> 00:22:28.138 align:center
Hi, honey!

00:22:30.223 --> 00:22:31.683 align:center
Oh! Oh.

00:22:32.434 --> 00:22:33.310 align:center
If you would.

00:22:39.816 --> 00:22:40.817 align:center
Claude.

00:22:41.735 --> 00:22:42.569 align:center
Oh!

00:22:47.491 --> 00:22:48.408 align:center
Hi.

00:22:48.492 --> 00:22:49.618 align:center
Thank you.

00:22:49.701 --> 00:22:51.495 align:center
I'm so glad you're all here today.

00:22:52.204 --> 00:22:54.247 align:center
I was very honored
when Anne asked me to sing.

00:22:54.331 --> 00:22:55.415 align:center
Thank you.

00:22:55.499 --> 00:22:59.378 align:center
You know, I wasn't at their first wedding,
so when Danny and I got married,

00:22:59.461 --> 00:23:01.713 align:center
I really wanted this
to be my wedding song,

00:23:01.797 --> 00:23:05.217 align:center
and he was like, "No, we can't steal that.
That's Nick and Anne's."

00:23:05.300 --> 00:23:08.178 align:center
So we had to choose another song, and…

00:23:09.012 --> 00:23:11.181 align:center
But this one was always in my heart.

00:23:14.643 --> 00:23:17.813 align:center
Mmm, yeah

00:23:18.480 --> 00:23:20.816 align:center
Looks like we made it

00:23:21.817 --> 00:23:25.404 align:center
Look how far we've come, my baby

00:23:25.487 --> 00:23:28.323 align:center
We might have took the long way

00:23:29.366 --> 00:23:32.452 align:center
We knew we'd get there someday

00:23:33.036 --> 00:23:34.413 align:center
They said

00:23:34.496 --> 00:23:38.625 align:center
"I bet they'll never make it"

00:23:38.708 --> 00:23:43.046 align:center
But just look at us holding on

00:23:43.130 --> 00:23:45.340 align:center
I'm sorry, that's not our wedding song.

00:23:45.424 --> 00:23:47.384 align:center
But it's great, please keep going.

00:23:47.467 --> 00:23:49.136 align:center
I am so sorry.

00:23:49.219 --> 00:23:51.680 align:center
Please, I love you. Please.

00:23:54.349 --> 00:23:57.853 align:center
You're still the one that I love

00:23:57.936 --> 00:24:01.314 align:center
The only one I dream of

00:24:01.398 --> 00:24:06.611 align:center
You're still the one I kiss good night

00:24:08.697 --> 00:24:11.324 align:center
I'm so glad we made it

00:24:12.075 --> 00:24:16.746 align:center
Look how far we've come, my baby

00:24:19.875 --> 00:24:21.251 align:center
Yes!

00:24:21.334 --> 00:24:22.919 align:center
Yeah. How lovely.

00:24:27.966 --> 00:24:29.968 align:center
Well, we're here today to celebrate…

00:24:30.051 --> 00:24:31.595 align:center
-Fantastic.
-…Nick and Anne,

00:24:31.678 --> 00:24:35.724 align:center
and their decision
to boldly proclaim their love…

00:24:35.807 --> 00:24:39.394 align:center
I am so sorry I massaged the truth
to get the wedding song that I wanted.

00:24:39.477 --> 00:24:41.396 align:center
I promise to work on my communication…

00:24:42.230 --> 00:24:44.024 align:center
next week right after my surgery.

00:24:44.566 --> 00:24:46.193 align:center
And we're getting those tattoos.

00:24:46.693 --> 00:24:51.323 align:center
…but who can tell us that
more than Nick and Anne?

00:24:51.406 --> 00:24:53.533 align:center
Anne, you've got the floor.

00:24:58.121 --> 00:25:01.833 align:center
Thank you, um, we're so lucky
that you're all here today.

00:25:02.459 --> 00:25:05.045 align:center
Dad, thank you.

00:25:06.796 --> 00:25:09.341 align:center
Uh, in my original vows, I wrote a poem

00:25:09.424 --> 00:25:11.760 align:center
where I rhymed "honeymoon"
with "crab Rangoon,"

00:25:11.843 --> 00:25:13.970 align:center
so I'm grateful for the do-over.

00:25:14.930 --> 00:25:16.973 align:center
This'll be short and sweet.

00:25:21.811 --> 00:25:22.729 align:center
Nick,

00:25:24.272 --> 00:25:25.190 align:center
I love you.

00:25:27.150 --> 00:25:30.612 align:center
Not every second of every day,
because that's fake.

00:25:32.531 --> 00:25:34.032 align:center
I love you bigger than that.

00:25:35.408 --> 00:25:37.202 align:center
I love you in the fun times,

00:25:37.702 --> 00:25:39.454 align:center
like when we went to Santorini

00:25:39.538 --> 00:25:43.333 align:center
and you demanded that we watch
Speed 2: Cruise Control in Greek.

00:25:45.001 --> 00:25:47.379 align:center
I love you in the harder times.

00:25:49.339 --> 00:25:53.802 align:center
Like when our daughter came way too early
and you were really brave,

00:25:54.511 --> 00:25:57.889 align:center
and you turned the NICU waiting room
into your office for the next eight weeks.

00:25:59.182 --> 00:26:01.309 align:center
I love that you're always surprising me,

00:26:02.102 --> 00:26:07.148 align:center
whether it's you
inexplicably getting into judo at 47…

00:26:08.608 --> 00:26:11.778 align:center
or buying me the world's biggest kiln
and installing it yourself,

00:26:11.861 --> 00:26:15.615 align:center
even when the guy said
it simply must be done by a professional.

00:26:18.660 --> 00:26:19.995 align:center
I just love you.

00:26:20.912 --> 00:26:22.622 align:center
And you annoy the hell out of me.

00:26:23.373 --> 00:26:25.292 align:center
And I annoy the hell out of you too.

00:26:26.585 --> 00:26:30.297 align:center
And I would be so honored
to annoy the hell out of each other

00:26:30.380 --> 00:26:33.883 align:center
in sickness and in health
until death do us part.

00:26:39.139 --> 00:26:42.892 align:center
Now, I had a smidge more time to prepare,
so it's a little unfair, but…

00:26:44.602 --> 00:26:46.021 align:center
Okay, honey, it's your turn.

00:26:54.779 --> 00:26:55.614 align:center
Hmm.

00:26:57.115 --> 00:26:57.949 align:center
Um…

00:27:00.702 --> 00:27:01.995 align:center
Wow. Uh…