So, breakfast is an important part of every day.
Which is why it should not only please the palate,
but be healthy and all-natural.
Now, I swear by the acai shakes from I Acai You Today.
Super tasty, and they are a heck of a nice boost.
Mm!
Jesus Christ.
Look, honey.
It's very sweet that you're so determined to help out and all.
Mm-hmm?
But, babe, your following's just too small to pay our mortgage.
Mm-hmm.
Except now I just hit 80,000.
Really? Wait, wait, wait. How? Last week you had 500.
Yeah. We call that talent.
I bought a few.
You bought 80,000 followers?
Eighty thousand! Sweet deal, right!?
But, uh, are they, like… uh, robots or whatever?
Yeah, uh… I mean, who cares?
It attracts real viewers, and they all subscribe and watch videos.
But isn't that sort of cheating?
Think of it like investing. Do I really have to explain this to you?
-I thought you were the media hotshot. -Wait a minute. How'd you pay for it?
The Mini.
Our Mini?
Uh, no. When we bought it, you said, "Ta-da! It's for you!"
Yeah, I meant--
And besides, you don't have a job. We don't need two cars.
-But I plan to have a job at some point. -Yeah… Ever heard of carpooling?
-Oh, by the way, I need the Volvo. -Okay.
I have a big meeting with an agency for content creators.
Oh, could you please make sure to call the hot water guy.
We need to install the new tap.
Oh, I'll do it.
-Easy. -Really?
Yeah, of course. After all, I'm a guy.
Hmm. Try to relax, okay? You better enjoy this while you still can.
-Yeah. -Bye.
ROOSTERS
Yeah. Oh.
-Wait. Hold up. Time-out. Stop. Wait. -What?
-What is it? -Oh, it's… Ah, Fuck.
-Sorry. -Huh?
I don't know what's goin' on.
This is new.
Well, congratulations. So glad it happened with me.
It's not because of you.
-I have a lot on my plate. -Mm-hmm.
Your wedding, for one.
Like what color envelopes do you want for the invitations?
-Yeah, that kind of stuff, right? Yeah. -Mm-hmm.
I think you were right. We should just stop, huh?
What? Give me a sec. Don't worry. The cobra will dance again.
Listen, babe. If all I wanted was bad sex, I could get that at home.
That's why I wanted an affair.
Whoa.
Yeah. Your, uh, testosterone's a bit…
The levels are… well, low.
Yeah. Actually, that's an understatement.
I've seen eight-year-old girls at my practice
with more testosterone than you.
-Is that not good? -For those girls? I don't think so.
It's fine. It explains a lot. At least, I hope.
Your, uh, erectile problems, your lack of energy…
Your hair… or, uh, what's left of it, I guess.
Listen, in ancient times, in a tribe…
Once a man had adequately reproduced, his, uh, hair would fall out
so that all the women would know they didn't need him after that.
He's old. Hopeless. Finished.
That's natural selection for ya. Nature is just miraculous, right?
Yeah, yeah. That's super cool.
Hey, but don't worry, 'kay? We're not still sporting loincloths.
Nowadays, it's so easy to fix.
A few doses of testosterone, and you'll be back to your former glory.
-You'll be set. -Yeah?
Sorry, but don't you have work today, Mr. Mike?
I thought I'd take a day.
Well, good.
-'Cause you work far too often. -Eh.
-And far too hard, you know? -Yeah.
Mm.
Ah, Mr. Mulder. Time off, huh?
Thank you, sweetheart. Mm! Lunch was delicious.
Glad you like it.
-Don't forget to say hi to Pam. -Of course.
Hey, Christine!
-Hey! -You're just as beautiful as ever.
Hey. Take it easy, buddy. This little dame is mine, all right?
-Oh, really? Still? -This weekend marks 42 years.
And we're just as happy as we were at our wedding.
And we get lucky as often as we did in those days.
-Whoa. -All right. That's enough, Dad. See ya.
-Time to get going. You guys grab a taxi. -That's amazing. I love them.
-He's insane. -Married for over four decades.
-They're still happy. -They're a wholesome old couple.
-I'm serious, though. -Bye.
Growing old together like that? Sign me up. I'll take that.
-Mm-hmm. -Well…
Yeah, you know, you're right.
I guess all of us should aspire to be like them, huh?
Anyway, let's have a little fun and hang out.
Go and play pool? We could see a movie? Anyone?
Uh, nah, I've got work to do around here, apparently.
-Merel's at the gym. I gotta get the kids. -Appraisal. I can't tonight.
And I have another date tonight. Tess set it up. And it's with, um…
-Carmen? -Carmen.
-Seriously? -Yeah. Yeah.
I know. Tess really wants me to get over her mother, I guess.
Yeah, or she just wants the house to herself.
-Oh. Wow, she's clever. -No, she's 16.
-Nah. -She has more fun than you.
That's not saying much.
She's not like you deviants.
When I was her age, I couldn't wait
till the folks left town so I could have the place to myself.
Yeah. You're a dude. It's different.
-No. -Nowadays, the roles are reversed.
-Trust me, bro. -Danny's right.
It's true. You leave the house, you've got six scooters at your door.
-Fatbikes, yeah. Scooters are out. Yeah. -Fatbikes.
They plug in their batteries while you're not home.
And they get drained again.
-Okay, guys. That's enough. -See ya.
-Let me drain you, Ivo. -Your bag's still here!
-You want it? -Knock it off!
-Hey, give me my bag. -Bye!
Yeah!
Yeah, yeah!
Need a spot?
Hi.
Hey, um… that's a leg press.
-You press up with your… -Yeah, I'm aware.
I was just thinking I would… try it a different way
so that… just to keep things interesting.
Twenty-one, twenty-two…
Yes!
Come here often?
No, actually, I've been working out at home a lot more these days.
-You have equipment there? -Yeah.
A vacuum cleaner, and a, uh… a tumble dryer and a dishwasher.
Hmm. Mm.
I see. I wouldn't forget a woman like you.
Right. 'Cause I'm twice as old as the rest of your clients, that what you mean?
Twice as cute.
Hey, so I have to go teach a class.
Body Shape. Want to join?
-Or were you still going? -I was just warmin' up, yeah.
Okay. Here we go.
Okay.
-Coming? -Yeah.
One. And hip.
And hip!
And out. And turn. Hip!
Hip. Hip.
And switch it! Switch it! Switch it! Switch it!
Shoulders. And shoulders.
One. And Superman. Superman. Superman.
Come on, ladies!
One, great, and chassé.
And chassé. And chassé.
And turn. And last pose.
Hey, great work, ladies!
Now that you've finished the installation process,
it's time to check that the tap has been connected properly.
Start by carefully checking the fitting.
-Yeah, but which fitting, dude? Huh? -I guess that's it for today.
I'm back at the house.
Stay happy, stay healthy.
…from now on, you'll be able to enjoy hot water
from your tap every day.
Ta-da!
Wait! Oh my God! What should I do?!
-Towel! Towel! -Towel?
What did I say? Don't startle me while I'm doing repairs.
Honey, I just wanted to share it and cast you as the cool husband.
Share it! Why do you have to share everything?
You're really getting on my nerves with all of your… influencer stuff.
Don't you have better things to do than take selfies everywhere?
I think the problem is that you've got nothing better to do.
Come on. You were gonna have fun.
I mean, what happened to resetting?
Or spending quality time with your friends?
Nah. They're always busy. Always.
We're all turning into these boring old farts.
I don't know what to do, Stevie. I really don't.
I get it, honey.
I mean, you're probably still in shock 'cause you got fired, hmm?
Just try not to think about it too much.
Why don't you try your hand at something new?
Who wouldn't want to hire someone with your level of experience?
MEREL CITY DRIVING SCHOOL
Oh.
Okay.
All right, here we go.
Whoa. Okay.
Yoo-hoo! Come on in here, gorgeous.
How about we head into the kitchen and I take you on the counter, huh?
What? No, I'm pretty sore still.
But this is what you want, right? For your man to go crazy on you, hmm?
-No. Not now, Greg. -Oh, why not?
-Your man is ready to go. -You crazy, Greg?
Huh? Oh. Oh, is that it?
-You like it rough, huh? -What? No.
-Yeah. Come on. -Jesus! Greg, stop it!
I said I don't feel like it.
I just don't get you sometimes.
Like, I'm ready to get it on, and it's still not okay?
Yeah. I'm tired. I'm not in the mood. That's all. Jeez.
Okay. That went great.
Okay, okay.
-♪ Every little movement… ♪ -Mm.
It's really nice of you to give this another shot after… the other night.
Not at all. I thought it was, um… an interesting evening out.
Mm.
Yeah, my friends are… interesting.
-And drunk. And definitely drunk. -Yeah.
Trust me, without alcohol, they're boring and old.
No, honestly. I didn't mind that. Um…
And what you sent me on the app… Look, I totally understand.
-Sorry. Could you remind me? -About your wife.
My wife?
That since you're still grieving her death,
you've been a little uncomfortable dating new people.
Um, yeah, dating is not easy right now.
It's very true. I'm just so sad she's gone.
You're very vulnerable.
I really like that about you.
So few men can talk about their feelings openly, you know?
They blather about football or their careers.
Well, I don't have a career, so that doesn't hurt.
You know, I actually really like that you're not a macho man.
-Mm. -Mm, uh, yeah.
Is it 'cause of your daughter?
Tess? No. No, no.
I mean, I wrote the messages. Yeah. Really.
I was wondering if that's why you seem less toxically masculine compared to most.
Yeah. I guess so.
-Do you have any photos? -Yeah.
Oh wow.
She's adorable.
Yeah. She takes after her mother.
Rest in peace, honey.
-Is she on the apps already? -Course not. Her?
You know, most teenage girls have dating profiles nowadays.
-Oh yeah? -Mm-hmm.
Tinder, Happn, Snapchat.
I mean, in the old days, all we had was hockey parties.
These days, everything's online. It's so much easier.
Uh…
-I feel a little sick. -Oh, really?
Yeah. I… I think it's… Uh, yeah, the cocktail.
I… I actually think the cherry's bad, so, I just…
-But-- -Ooh. I'll Venmo you.
Ivo!
Okay, party's over, guys!
Time to grab your little batteries and get out!
What are you doing here?
What am I doing here? What are all these guys doing here?
Guys? Dad, is something wrong?
Come out! There's no point in hiding from me!
It's just me. I'm the only one here.
-And your computer? -Hmm?
Anything you put on the internet stays there.
I'm just getting a head start on my history homework. What's going on?
Homework. Thank Christ.
Oh, sweetheart. You're just the best.
I'm so proud of you. Keep learning.
-Uh… -Forever.
-Mm-hmm. -Mm.
-Hey, honey. -Hi.
-Good morning. Here ya go. -Mm.
-Oh. -And how about a little, uh…
I'm not hungry. I have to go.
I was thinking we could, um… go for a nice night out with my parents.
So how 'bout it?
-But it's Friday, though. -And?
-Didn't you see your parents yesterday? -Yeah.
I did. Yeah. But you didn't.
And, come on, you know… They just adore your company.
But, um… can't we do it another night? I do want to…
I was just thinking that we could go out.
'Cause you almost never have time on Fridays.
It's their anniversary.
And I feel like… we should do something nice.
-Yeah. Okay, then. -Hmm?
Um, they've been together how long? I forget.
Uh, long. Yeah. Yeah, a really, really long time. Yeah.
And they're going strong.
They're goin' strong.
Hey!
-Yeah! -Motherfu…
-Damn it! -Game, set, and match!
Hey, relax, all right? It's a game, Greg. Take it easy.
You're right. Yeah, you're right.
What's goin' on? You can talk to us.
-We're your friends. -No.
No. Let's keep playing.
See? Men have such a hard time talking about their feelings.
I was just speaking to someone about this.
-Let me guess. It was a woman? -There's an official term for that.
It's known as toxic masculinity.
Yeah, and there's a term for what you're doing.
Stalling! Come on. Come on.
Uh, no, dude. Sorry. I… I gotta go. I have an appointment.
Okay, guys. I'll play against you two. Yeah. Come on. Come on.
Yeah. Come on. Yeah.
-You know, sorry, Greg. I, um… -Huh?
I got the work.
-Oh, new job, huh? Congrats. Good for you. -Huh?
C'mon!
What a surprise, Mike.
I couldn't believe you still had my number.
So, what is it? What can I do for you?
Yeah. Uh, when I interviewed for that job,
you said that your door would stay open if I changed my mind.
That was eight years ago.
Well, let's just say I like to take time with big decisions.
I'm curious why you want to work with us now.
A feeling.
Suddenly, I thought, "This is the right moment."
So you're telling me this isn't about the Twitter storm over Fuck Island?
Twitter? Is that still a thing?
Come on, Mike, I'm not stupid. You suddenly reach out after eight years?
Why else would you be coming to me?
It's all in the timing, Annemarie.
Listen, I'm ready for a new challenge,
and I think you could use someone with my skill set on your team too.
-Oh, is that so? -Yeah, it's a tough world.
And it's never been so important
to have a strong man on your side, Annemarie.
A man's man that'll… that'll do what needs to be done.
-You know what I think? -That I'm right?
I think you used us after the interview process
to get a better deal from our competitor, right?
Of course not.
But you're right, actually. It's a very tough world.
And men like you are realizing that now too.
Look, sorry, lunch was an excellent idea. We should do this again.
But you'll have to find another organization
to do what needs to be done.
It doesn't matter what I do. It's always wrong. Hello.
Chill out, brother. Bet you it's menopause.
Ha! That's very sexist.
Say that to Merel, and she's like, "No!"
I mean, you might have it.
I noticed we have to keep stopping so you can piss, right?
I had it once too.
You do that in your house?
You wear handcuffs in your house?
-What'd you say? -Or you use 'em on your wife, bro?
-Whoa! -Dang!
You a comedian?
-Yeah, actually. -Oh, yeah? Me too!
And now?
Are you still laughing? Assaulting a police officer is a f--
-Hey, get moving! -Just hurry up it up. Hurry!
Hey, stand back!
-I wanna know his badge number! -Hey!
Get off!
Okay. Look at this.
If everyone left their garbage lyin' around…
Listen, Greg. I don't know what's goin' on with you lately.
-But take the afternoon off. -Damn it!
"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity."
Ah. Insightful. Bet she got that from Cosmopolitan.
Albert Einstein.
Oh, what? Come on. What do you have against her?
Well, for one, I refuse to be friends with someone who doesn't have cellulite.
-No, no. I'm working out. -You're working out?
Yeah. I'm committing to a program.
What're you doing? Yoga? Spinning?
Mm-mm.
No, I have a personal trainer. Ramon.
A personal trainer?
And how… personal is this trainer, huh?
Ah, you're terrible. No, he's young enough to be my son.
-But when I met him, he was pretty flirty. -Mm? I knew it.
-And you should see his body. -Mm-hmm?
Oh my God, one look, and it's Niagara Falls.
So go get a hotel room. Come on. You've earned it.
Hey. No chance. Nope. No, I really can't. I really can't.
I mean, even if he wanted to, I can't.
What do you mean?
Nothing wrong with opening up your options.
Could be fun, right?
Good old-fashioned cheating on my husband?
No, I don't mean cheating.
I'm talking about a, uh… open relationship.
Daan and I have been considering it.
-Are you? -Mm.
Well, actually, Daan's still considering it.
And I'm in favor of it.
Oh, come on. It never works in practice, though.
Well, you never know until you try, right?
Plus, imagine Daan trying to commit totally to a single partner forever.
Yeah, can't be done.
No, no. Sorry, but I really can't do it.
Look, Greg would have major issues with it.
Why shouldn't you open things? He's not meeting your needs.
This week, I was giving him a blow job. He fell asleep.
That's really… Oh, sorry.
I just want to say thank you to all my amazing followers! Whoo!
I'll drink to all of you tonight!
Sweetheart?
It's over, Stevie.
What do you mean?
I mean me. Nobody needs me.
'Cause I'm passé. I'm a has-been. A loser.
Come on, you know that's not true at all, honey.
-I don't know. -Hey, I still want you.
I want my old life again.
-Mm. -I miss…
I guess I just wish I could rewind the clock.
You're the same to me. You haven't changed, sweetie.
My prince on the white pony.
-Or not a pony. A horse. Big, strong one. -Even if I have to sell our home?
-That's not happening. -It will if I can't find work, Stevie!
You could come and work for me, honey.
I got my first brand partner. Ten thousand euros.
What?
For the hot water installation. Here.
The video's been viewed almost 100,000 times already.
Oh!
Told you we'd figure it out. We're a good team. Hmm?
Yeah. Hmm.
Can't hear the doorbell. Can they?
Pop! Mom!
If they're not here, I know a nice club we could go to later.
Hmm. Uh, just a sec.
Mom, where are you?
-Listening to some Strauss? -Ah.
No, it's… Yeah. Well, we're at your door.
Just to see you guys.
Uh, we… Yeah, I know. I saw you both yesterday, but…
Oh. Sure, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Another night, sure.
All right, then.
They're not here.
'Kay. Well, come.
Seems like a shame.
I understand, sweetheart, but they have a life too.
-So, that was a good workout, wasn't it? -Huh?
Oh yeah.
-Yeah. -How 'bout a drink?
-Water, heck yeah. -I was thinking of a cocktail.
Uh, you… with… me?
Unless you have other plans, yeah.
Well, you might need to teach me how to drive, then.
Well, when you turn 16,
give me a call, and I'll be sure to put your name down.
Another one.
Um…
Did you know there are 450 calories in that gin and tonic?
Oh. Oh, is that why you asked me here? To stay on my payroll?
I don't meet a lot of women like you where I work.
Old and out of shape, you mean?
Charming. And original.
-Eh. -All these… plastic fantastic chicks.
-You're different. You're not plastic. -Ah.
Yes, thanks.
Um, so how does this work?
I mean, do you do this to put yourself through school, or…?
-I'm starting my own gym. -Oh.
I'm not doing it for anyone,
uh, who's just there to look more toned, fitter, or sexier.
My dream is to, uh… take a more grounded approach.
Holistic wellness.
Nutritional advice, meditation, and some coaching.
And no plastic.
-Sounds super. -Yeah?
Can I count you in?
Uh, I'm gonna go to…
You know… to the bathroom.
Okay, it was nice.
Your ego got a good stroking tonight.
Now just leave.
Oh shit. No.
Oh. Wait. Hang on.
No, wait. Not here.
-Wh…? Okay. Where, then? -I don't know. Not here.
It's just weird, that's all. The symphony? They hate classical music.
Well, now it's just us two.
And we're gonna have a fun night at the club.
Yeah, but I shouldn't have bought the flowers.
-Mojito? -Yeah. Uh, two mojitos. Thanks a lot.
Mm.
-Sweetheart. -Yeah?
I know you're still thinking it over.
So, you know, nothing needs to happen tonight. No pressure.
Let's just look around a little, and then… then we'll see.
Hold on, hold on. Where… where are we?
In a swingers' club.
Wait… hey, no. Hey, hey, hey.
-No, Pam. This is really… Come on. -Just--
This isn't my thing. Look, honey. I love you.
Come on. Let's stay open.
We don't need to do this, though. Really.
Monogamy can work. I know we can do it.
-Well, I don't think it can. -Sure, it can. Take my parents for…
-Hey, Pam! Mm! -Oh, wow! Mwah!
-Oh, what a surprise! -Oh, Danny.
-Christine, Henk. -Hi, guys.
I thought you were going to the symphony.
Sorry, darling. We just didn't want to freak you out.
-But-- -How old-fashioned you are.
-But what are you guys doing here? -Whatever we want.
We've been married for 42 years.
Sometimes a little variety's just what you need.
You know what? You're absolutely right. Don't you think?
Oh, we have to get going. Uh, Suus and Harry have arrived.
-What? From bridge? -Well, Suus is. Harry just likes to watch.
-Oh, congrats on your anniversary. -Oh, yeah. Thank you.
Suus!
How do you feel about it now?
I… I thought they were gonna hear some music.
Suus and Harry?
Baby, we don't have to do anything we're not sure about.
Let's just go home after this round,
and then we'll chat tomorrow and set down some clear ground rules, okay?
Hey, love. How was it?
You put the kids down?
Yeah, a little later than normal, but we finished the story.
Oh, fine.
Honey?
Uh, I think honesty is essential right now.
Yeah.
I went to see the doctor.
Tell me you're not sick.
Uh, eh… My testosterone's a bit low, all right?
Yeah, so that's why lately I haven't been, um…
Yeah, it's been kinda tough.
But it is not because you don't turn me on.
Huh?
-Uh… -Yeah.
Um, so I got some shots, and that's, you know…
The reason why I've been acting a little crazy.
-Oh. -Yeah. Sorry.
-Okay. -Right. Okay, um…
Mm!
Jeez. Whoa.
You kinda stink. You're all sweaty.
These workouts, you must be killin' it.
Never at home, always safe sex, and we tell each other everything.
Yeah, unless of course the other person doesn't want to know.
Look, the most important thing is the two of us are open and honest, right?
Oh, yes. Uh… I'll just put, "Open and honest."
-And no friends. -Daan.
What? Pam, obviously, I trust you. But my friends? No.
Good. Okay, is that all? If so, we can all sign it.
Wait, hold on. We don't do it with the same person twice.
-Really? -We can't risk falling in love.
Hmm?
Sorry, but I usually do power-of-attorney stuff, so I'm lost.
Yeah, but wait. You could be with the same person more than once
without falling for them.
No. This is nonnegotiable.
If you want me to sign off, then you've got to agree, Pam.
Good. "Never twice with the same person."
Perfect. I believe that is all.
Let's print it out so the two of us can sign now.
Sure.
This is exciting. I'm so glad we're doing this.
I know we're both nervous.
But I think this is gonna be really good for us.
Mwah.
Yeah. Still on the fence, are you?
Imbecile.
Seriously guys, this stuff is totally amazing.
Plus, it's not sticky. And it's natural. It's the best out there.
Okay. Let's try it again. This time with, uh… your shades pulled--
Honey, can we go inside? Come on. It's getting cold.
Doesn't matter. I'll throw a filter on you.
On my goosebumps? This is a sunscreen company.
It's gonna look terrible.
Hey, who's the director here?
I know exactly what the people want. Okay?
There's a reason I was in business for 20 years. Camera!
And there's a reason you got fired.
-What? -Nothing. Just a little tired.
I know! That's what I thought.
Uh, I live right here.
Oh.
Ah.
Want another coffee?
Uh… mm, I don't know. Then I'll get too wired to fall asleep.
Who says we'll be doing any sleeping? Come here, you idiot.
Uh, wait, hold on, Carmen. Look, I, uh… I…
Can I, um… um… be honest with you?
-You have to do it now? -My Tinder account, it's not… mine, okay?
Oh, come on, I don't care. My photos are like ten years old.
But... Mm.
Well, the thing is, it's my daughter.
Tess. Uh, she… she sent all those messages.
And my wife, or… ex-wife, um… is alive.
Oh, I feel for you, that sucks.
-Mmm! -No, wait a sec. Hang on. Um…
So, four years ago, we decided to separate.
'Cause she cheated.
I forgave her, but she still… wanted to get a divorce. And…
I really hate her sometimes, but…
I guess I don't know if I'm really over the relationship yet.
And… honestly, I… I think it's because I don't want to be in some ways.
So use me.
What?
Just get on top of me to get over her.
Uh… Oh, uh, yeah.
Uh… but… I thought that you… like a man to be vulnerable,
as opposed to macho?
Listen, man. All I want from you is an orgasm.
Can you handle that?
-Yeah. Uh, I think. Yeah. -Yeah?
Whoa!
Need any help?
Tess! Hey, I'm back!
-Hey. -Hi.
-How are ya? -Good.
How was your date?
Well, I won't get into the details, but let's just say things ended well.
That's good, Dad. Glad you had a good time.
Uh… yeah, did, uh… did you manage to get to your homework?
-Yeah. I did. -Okay. Hey, turn in early, okay?
You got it.
What is that?
-Nothing. -Really? I have eyes, you know.
Look, okay. Just come on out, young man.
Time to give it up.
Oh, yeah. Nothin' wrong with that, obviously.
Um…
good night. thin' wrong with that, obviously.