WEBVTT

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-Okay ka lang?
-Mm-hmm.

00:00:26.985 --> 00:00:28.945 align:center
-Unang baby mo ba 'to?
-Mm-hmm.

00:00:29.029 --> 00:00:30.029 align:center
Okay.

00:00:30.864 --> 00:00:32.782 align:center
Heto ang tibok ng puso ng baby.

00:00:33.408 --> 00:00:35.243 align:center
Ito 'yong tiyan ng baby.

00:00:35.827 --> 00:00:37.412 align:center
Ito 'yong kanang kidney,

00:00:37.495 --> 00:00:38.830 align:center
'yong kaliwang kidney,

00:00:38.913 --> 00:00:40.457 align:center
'yong spine,

00:00:40.540 --> 00:00:42.542 align:center
'yong tailbone, 'yong balakang,

00:00:42.625 --> 00:00:45.587 align:center
dorsal, balikat, siko.

00:00:46.629 --> 00:00:48.923 align:center
Malaki pa ang espasyong gagalawan ng bata.

00:00:52.093 --> 00:00:54.095 align:center
Ito 'yong ulo ng baby.

00:00:54.179 --> 00:00:57.724 align:center
Ito 'yong outline ng bungo ng baby
mula sa itaas.

00:00:58.433 --> 00:01:01.019 align:center
Ito 'yong itsura pababa sa utak.

00:01:03.438 --> 00:01:06.316 align:center
Normal lahat ng anatomy.
Tama ang laki ng baby.

00:01:06.399 --> 00:01:09.903 align:center
'Yong sikmura, spine,
bladder, kidneys, puso,

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normal lahat ng nakikita ko
sa baby na ganito ang edad.

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ANO ANG NORMAL

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ANO ANG ITINUTURING NA TIPIKAL O NORMAL

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NEURODIVERGENT - PANG-URI

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NAIIBA ANG MENTAL O NEUROLOGICAL FUNCTION

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SA ITINUTURING NA TIPIKAL O NORMAL

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MAKALIPAS ANG 33 TAON

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Hi sa inyong lahat.

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Hello.

00:01:52.779 --> 00:01:55.907 align:center
Okay, sandali lang tayong
magkakasama, kaya…

00:01:56.908 --> 00:01:58.868 align:center
Alam kong ga-graduate na
ang marami sa inyo.

00:01:59.494 --> 00:02:02.872 align:center
Pag nasa mundo na kayo sa labas,
marami pa kayong di alam.

00:02:02.956 --> 00:02:07.502 align:center
At ito 'yong panahon na parang
kailangan n'yong maghanap ng payo.

00:02:07.585 --> 00:02:11.631 align:center
Kung saan-saan kayo maghahanap
para maintindihan kung paano mabuhay.

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Gusto ko lang kayong paalalahanan,
tandaan n'yong nandito kayo.

00:02:15.635 --> 00:02:18.680 align:center
Tingnan ang sarili
at magtiwala sa sarili ninyo,

00:02:18.763 --> 00:02:23.226 align:center
dahil mas maraming sagot
ang nandito kaysa sa inaakala n'yo.

00:02:30.066 --> 00:02:32.152 align:center
Natatakot ako.

00:02:34.612 --> 00:02:38.074 align:center
Di ko alam na ganito pala kahirap…

00:02:39.951 --> 00:02:41.786 align:center
malaman lahat ng ito tungkol sa 'kin.

00:02:43.204 --> 00:02:45.248 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba sa 'kin?

00:02:48.585 --> 00:02:49.586 align:center
Oo.

00:02:50.545 --> 00:02:52.839 align:center
Pero napag-isip-isip ko ding

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delikado ang maging curious o magtanong.

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Ten and one…

00:03:00.388 --> 00:03:01.848 align:center
Dapat maintindihan ng mga tao

00:03:01.931 --> 00:03:05.351 align:center
na may mga taong
iba ang nararanasan sa mundo.

00:03:05.435 --> 00:03:10.023 align:center
Pero kamangha-mangha
ang paraan ng pagtingin mo sa mundo.

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Kung aalisin sa 'kin ang pagsasayaw,
di ko makikilala ang sarili ko.

00:03:23.494 --> 00:03:27.373 align:center
Pero kaya nga nababago nito ang lahat.

00:03:27.457 --> 00:03:28.499 align:center
Magkuwento ka pa.

00:03:29.834 --> 00:03:32.795 align:center
May pagbabago kapag tinanggap mo na talaga

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at kinilala ang mga karanasan at damdaming
matagal mo nang nararanasan.

00:03:39.219 --> 00:03:42.013 align:center
Mas nagiging totoo 'yon.

00:03:44.682 --> 00:03:49.228 align:center
Lagi kong nararamdaman no'n
na parang may mali.

00:03:52.941 --> 00:03:54.734 align:center
Iba na sa pakiramdam ang lahat ngayon.

00:03:59.072 --> 00:04:01.282 align:center
May challenge sa tatlong areas.

00:04:01.824 --> 00:04:03.618 align:center
'Yong isa, communication.

00:04:03.701 --> 00:04:04.869 align:center
'Yong isa, socialization.

00:04:04.953 --> 00:04:07.330 align:center
'Yong isa pa,
paulit-ulit at stereotyped behaviors.

00:04:07.413 --> 00:04:10.416 align:center
Meron ka ng tatlong 'yon.

00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:14.921 align:center
Sa pamamagitan ng history at kabataan mo,
titingnan ko kung paano nangyari 'yon.

00:04:18.049 --> 00:04:21.177 align:center
May neurobiology kung paano
nabubuo ang pagkatao,

00:04:21.260 --> 00:04:23.221 align:center
na nagsisimula sa pagkabata

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at nananatili sa 'yo habambuhay.

00:04:26.849 --> 00:04:30.603 align:center
At pasok ka sa criteria
para sa autism spectrum disorder.

00:04:34.857 --> 00:04:38.695 align:center
Ang autism spectrum disorder
ay isang komplikadong kondisyon

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na kinabibilangan ng paulit-ulit
na mga hamon sa social interaction,

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speech, at nonverbal communication
at restricted/repetitive behaviors.

00:05:00.508 --> 00:05:05.013 align:center
Karaniwang nada-diagnose ang ASD
pag toddler ang bata o maagang pagkabata.

00:05:06.848 --> 00:05:12.061 align:center
Magkakaiba ang epekto ng ASD
at ang tindi ng sintomas sa bawat tao.

00:05:20.486 --> 00:05:22.447 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba sa 'kin?

00:05:41.424 --> 00:05:42.717 align:center
May kailangan ka?

00:05:45.845 --> 00:05:47.680 align:center
Parang…

00:05:49.682 --> 00:05:53.561 align:center
Nakakagaan lang ng pakiramdam.

00:05:57.023 --> 00:05:58.441 align:center
Di ko ma-imagine.

00:05:59.067 --> 00:06:01.861 align:center
Ngayon, opisyal kong natanggap

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ang diagnosis ko
ng autism spectrum disorder, Level 1.

00:06:07.033 --> 00:06:08.576 align:center
"Kailangan ng suporta."

00:06:09.077 --> 00:06:10.370 align:center
Mag-empake ka.

00:06:11.204 --> 00:06:12.497 align:center
Mag-empake?

00:06:13.206 --> 00:06:14.916 align:center
-Oo.
-Para sa'n?

00:06:14.999 --> 00:06:15.958 align:center
Para sa paglalakbay.

00:06:16.834 --> 00:06:19.003 align:center
Ayaw mo nga pala ng mga analogy.

00:06:19.087 --> 00:06:21.255 align:center
Di ko naintindihan 'yon.

00:06:25.259 --> 00:06:28.429 align:center
Oo, marami akong nararamdaman. Tipong…

00:06:29.430 --> 00:06:34.227 align:center
Parang di ko mapagkakatiwalaan
'yong isip ko o 'yong utak ko.

00:06:34.310 --> 00:06:35.395 align:center
Parang…

00:06:36.979 --> 00:06:40.608 align:center
Nagbabasa ako ng… mga katangian

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ng taong may autism o ASD Level 1,

00:06:44.487 --> 00:06:48.908 align:center
at parang binabasa ko 'yong buhay ko,

00:06:48.991 --> 00:06:52.870 align:center
malinaw na malinaw 'yon sa 'kin,
sobrang nakaka-relate ako.

00:06:52.954 --> 00:06:57.875 align:center
Tapos bigla na lang, pakiramdam ko,
gawa-gawa ko lang 'yon, di 'yon totoo,

00:06:57.959 --> 00:07:03.214 align:center
o naghahanap lang ako
ng pansamantalang lunas.

00:07:03.297 --> 00:07:05.675 align:center
Parang niloloko ko lang sarili ko.

00:07:05.758 --> 00:07:09.846 align:center
Pero ngayon, pormal na akong na-diagnose.

00:07:09.929 --> 00:07:13.516 align:center
Kaya… makakahinga na ako

00:07:13.599 --> 00:07:17.687 align:center
at makikilala ko na… ang sarili ko.

00:07:17.770 --> 00:07:19.897 align:center
Pakiramdam ko, di talaga ako…

00:07:20.982 --> 00:07:23.901 align:center
nagkaro'n ng pagkakataong
magawa 'yon noon.

00:07:23.985 --> 00:07:28.489 align:center
Kaya parang nakaka-overwhelm,
pero para ding…

00:07:30.074 --> 00:07:30.908 align:center
ang promising.

00:07:30.992 --> 00:07:32.785 align:center
At nagpapasalamat ako

00:07:32.869 --> 00:07:36.914 align:center
na nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon
na maranasan ang prosesong 'to.

00:07:37.415 --> 00:07:38.624 align:center
Bakit ka natatakot?

00:07:41.127 --> 00:07:46.090 align:center
'Yong pagsali sa documentary
ang pinakakinatatakutan ko,

00:07:46.883 --> 00:07:51.888 align:center
'yong makipag-usap sa isang tao

00:07:51.971 --> 00:07:54.682 align:center
sa malalim na level, at…

00:07:58.019 --> 00:08:03.232 align:center
Tiwala ako kay Alex, pero ayokong
gumawa ng mga bagay na di ko alam gawin.

00:08:04.108 --> 00:08:05.484 align:center
Pero alam mo na 'yan

00:08:05.568 --> 00:08:09.280 align:center
kasi lahat ng kaya mong gawin ngayon,
di mo naman din alam dati.

00:08:10.615 --> 00:08:15.036 align:center
Ano'ng nakatulong sa 'yong…
malampasan 'yong moments na 'yon?

00:08:16.496 --> 00:08:19.207 align:center
Iniisip ko na, "Nawawala ako." Kumusta?

00:08:19.290 --> 00:08:21.042 align:center
-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

00:08:21.125 --> 00:08:23.377 align:center
-Si Ian.
-Hi, Ian. Ako si Alex.

00:08:24.212 --> 00:08:26.631 align:center
Naniniwala akong ito ang tamang gawin.

00:08:29.592 --> 00:08:30.843 align:center
Kaya gagawin ko na lang.

00:08:39.852 --> 00:08:41.729 align:center
Ito si James.

00:08:42.939 --> 00:08:46.317 align:center
-Wow, tingnan mo.
-Wow. Ang taray, o.

00:08:46.400 --> 00:08:49.028 align:center
-Ang taray.
-Ang taray niya.

00:08:49.111 --> 00:08:50.571 align:center
Eto na nga ang alamat.

00:08:50.655 --> 00:08:52.698 align:center
-'Yong picture…
-First recital ko 'yan.

00:08:52.782 --> 00:08:54.450 align:center
-'Yong kamay…
-Alam ko.

00:08:54.534 --> 00:08:56.661 align:center
-Okay lang lagyan ka ng mic?
-Sige.

00:08:57.245 --> 00:09:01.749 align:center
Isa sa mga nakaka-stress, di ko alam
kung paano ginagawa ang isang dokyu

00:09:01.832 --> 00:09:03.668 align:center
o pa'no ka magtrabaho, at…

00:09:03.751 --> 00:09:05.836 align:center
-Kinukunan mo rin ako.
-Kanina pa.

00:09:05.920 --> 00:09:09.215 align:center
Sinusubukan ko lang kunan
'yong mga ginagawa niya.

00:09:09.298 --> 00:09:11.384 align:center
At ang saya.

00:09:11.467 --> 00:09:16.305 align:center
Ang weird kasi bawat taong
nakakasalamuha ko,

00:09:16.389 --> 00:09:18.349 align:center
di nila alam 'to.

00:09:18.849 --> 00:09:22.728 align:center
Kaya— Tapos iniisip ko na din
'yong mismong filming—

00:09:22.812 --> 00:09:25.106 align:center
Grabe lang talaga lahat.

00:09:25.189 --> 00:09:27.066 align:center
Lahat…

00:09:27.149 --> 00:09:30.111 align:center
Parang ibang-iba 'yong bawat araw.

00:09:31.862 --> 00:09:33.114 align:center
Magugulat ka.

00:09:34.073 --> 00:09:35.574 align:center
Wow, tingnan mo 'yan.

00:09:35.658 --> 00:09:38.911 align:center
May tapang akong

00:09:39.829 --> 00:09:42.582 align:center
gumawa ng kung ano-ano
sa ngalan ng pagsasayaw

00:09:43.916 --> 00:09:48.045 align:center
na hindi ko magagawa bilang si Jenn lang.

00:09:48.129 --> 00:09:50.589 align:center
-Gaya ng ginagawa natin ngayon.
-Ako din.

00:09:51.090 --> 00:09:53.217 align:center
At sa buhay ko, marami 'yon.

00:09:53.301 --> 00:09:57.263 align:center
Kasi 'yong umpisa
ng bawat pakikipag-ugnayan

00:09:57.346 --> 00:10:01.559 align:center
o bawat pagkakataon
o bawat trabaho, parang,

00:10:01.642 --> 00:10:03.436 align:center
"Ayokong gawin 'yan."

00:10:03.519 --> 00:10:09.358 align:center
May kung anong level ng anxiety agad.

00:10:09.442 --> 00:10:10.693 align:center
Pero ginagawa ko pa rin.

00:10:12.320 --> 00:10:14.238 align:center
Gano'n din ako.

00:10:15.615 --> 00:10:17.283 align:center
Tingin ko, iba 'yong project na 'to.

00:10:17.366 --> 00:10:19.910 align:center
Ang totoo, di pa 'ko sure kung ano 'to.

00:10:19.994 --> 00:10:24.373 align:center
Umiikot ang career ko sa kung ano'ng
naibibigay ng performance sa audience.

00:10:26.042 --> 00:10:27.793 align:center
Pero gusto ko talagang alamin

00:10:27.877 --> 00:10:30.755 align:center
kung ano'ng naibabalik ng performance
sa mga artist mismo.

00:10:30.838 --> 00:10:31.714 align:center
Totoo.

00:10:31.797 --> 00:10:35.176 align:center
Dahil doon, napadpad ako
sa movement-based psychotherapy,

00:10:35.259 --> 00:10:37.595 align:center
na pinasosyal na paraan ng pagsasabing,

00:10:37.678 --> 00:10:40.389 align:center
"Pag palpak ang salita,
sayaw ang ipang-communicate."

00:10:40.473 --> 00:10:43.684 align:center
-Tama.
-Dito ako nahihirapan.

00:10:43.768 --> 00:10:44.894 align:center
6 TAON ANG NAKAKARAAN

00:10:44.977 --> 00:10:47.229 align:center
-Ikaw agad 'yong naisip ko.
-Siyempre.

00:10:47.313 --> 00:10:51.692 align:center
Anim na taon na pala,
pero nag-reach out ako sa 'yo

00:10:51.776 --> 00:10:55.363 align:center
kasi sinubaybayan ko na ang career mo
mula no'ng magkasama tayo sa music video.

00:10:56.614 --> 00:10:59.325 align:center
Tadhana sigurong paglipas ng mga panahon,

00:10:59.408 --> 00:11:02.328 align:center
tinext kita sa parehong araw
ng pagka-diagnose sa 'yo.

00:11:02.411 --> 00:11:04.997 align:center
Di pa rin ako makapaniwala. Ang weird.

00:11:05.081 --> 00:11:07.958 align:center
Kakauwi ko lang galing LA
no'ng gabi bago 'yon.

00:11:08.042 --> 00:11:11.420 align:center
Kinaumagahan 'yong session niya.
Boom, ayun 'yong email.

00:11:11.504 --> 00:11:14.632 align:center
-Oo.
-Tapos, grabe 'yong session niya.

00:11:16.092 --> 00:11:19.261 align:center
Ano'ng nag-udyok sa 'yo
na mag-perform at sumayaw?

00:11:19.345 --> 00:11:21.847 align:center
Dati, ang sagot ko ay…

00:11:23.724 --> 00:11:28.312 align:center
Napadpad lang ako do'n

00:11:28.396 --> 00:11:29.814 align:center
at na-in love na 'ko.

00:11:29.897 --> 00:11:35.277 align:center
At… parang ito 'yong purpose ko

00:11:35.361 --> 00:11:38.364 align:center
at dapat kong gawin sa buhay na 'to.

00:11:38.447 --> 00:11:40.866 align:center
At ito 'yong talento ko.

00:11:40.950 --> 00:11:43.369 align:center
At ito 'yong paraan
para makipag-ugnayan sa tao.

00:11:43.452 --> 00:11:48.457 align:center
At ito 'yong paraan
para makatulong ako sa mga tao.

00:11:48.541 --> 00:11:53.629 align:center
Pero lagi kong nararamdaman
na talagang napadpad lang ako do'n,

00:11:53.713 --> 00:11:57.091 align:center
o, inakay ako sa buhay na 'to,

00:11:57.174 --> 00:12:00.052 align:center
na… nararamdaman ko pa rin,

00:12:00.136 --> 00:12:04.348 align:center
pero… sa tingin ko—

00:12:04.432 --> 00:12:08.602 align:center
na-obsess lang talaga ako sa pagsasayaw,
siguro dahil may autism ako.

00:12:08.686 --> 00:12:13.482 align:center
At nakatulong 'to sa 'kin

00:12:13.566 --> 00:12:18.654 align:center
sa mga paraang… ngayon ko lang nauunawaan.

00:12:18.738 --> 00:12:21.365 align:center
Sige, tingnan natin
kung sa'n makarating 'to.

00:12:21.449 --> 00:12:23.742 align:center
Dahan-dahanin natin, susundan kita.

00:12:23.826 --> 00:12:26.328 align:center
-Sige.
-Tingnan natin kung ano'ng lumabas.

00:12:27.288 --> 00:12:28.205 align:center
Simulan na natin.

00:13:03.282 --> 00:13:06.577 align:center
One, two, three, four, five, six…

00:13:10.790 --> 00:13:12.374 align:center
And one, two…

00:13:17.338 --> 00:13:18.589 align:center
Yes, Barry!

00:13:21.425 --> 00:13:22.593 align:center
Five, six…

00:13:24.887 --> 00:13:25.763 align:center
Yes!

00:13:27.264 --> 00:13:29.183 align:center
Yes, lawakan n'yo…

00:13:29.725 --> 00:13:31.727 align:center
Gamitin n'yo 'yong space sa quadrant n'yo.

00:13:31.810 --> 00:13:33.521 align:center
Oo.

00:13:33.604 --> 00:13:35.481 align:center
Dito ang tingin. Patingin.

00:13:35.564 --> 00:13:38.067 align:center
Noong una, sayaw lang 'yon.

00:13:38.150 --> 00:13:39.401 align:center
Pero ilang taon na…

00:13:39.485 --> 00:13:41.070 align:center
Bubuka, mamumulaklak.

00:13:41.153 --> 00:13:44.740 align:center
…mula no'ng hindi na 'yon
'yong therapy para sa 'kin.

00:13:46.200 --> 00:13:47.159 align:center
Dumating 'yong point

00:13:47.243 --> 00:13:50.788 align:center
na mas marami nang kinukuha
kaysa binibigay 'yong pagsasayaw sa 'kin.

00:13:50.871 --> 00:13:51.705 align:center
Yes!

00:13:51.789 --> 00:13:54.208 align:center
Bilang tao,
pag pinapanood ko kayong sumayaw,

00:13:54.291 --> 00:13:57.545 align:center
kung di ko makita ang mga mata n'yo,

00:13:57.628 --> 00:14:00.005 align:center
di ako makaka-connect sa inyo.

00:14:02.174 --> 00:14:04.677 align:center
Nakahanap ako ng paraan
para kumita sa gusto kong gawin,

00:14:04.760 --> 00:14:06.345 align:center
pero matagal-tagal na din

00:14:06.428 --> 00:14:09.181 align:center
mula no'ng maligayahan ako sa paggalaw.

00:14:09.265 --> 00:14:12.852 align:center
Pero kasabay no'n, career ko pa rin ito,

00:14:12.935 --> 00:14:15.729 align:center
pero di na talaga ako masaya
para sa sarili ko.

00:14:17.147 --> 00:14:19.066 align:center
Pero nandiyan pa rin ako para sa students.

00:14:19.149 --> 00:14:21.902 align:center
Yes! Tama. Tara, guys.

00:14:22.486 --> 00:14:25.948 align:center
Hirap akong makahanap ng environments
kung sa'n gusto ko talagang sumayaw.

00:14:26.949 --> 00:14:30.035 align:center
Nakikita ko kung pa'no ka nawalan ng gana.

00:14:30.119 --> 00:14:33.747 align:center
Maswerte akong kumikita ako
sa paggawa ng bagay na gustong-gusto ko,

00:14:33.831 --> 00:14:35.541 align:center
pero parang sumpa rin 'yon,

00:14:35.624 --> 00:14:38.919 align:center
dahil pwedeng mawala 'yong saya
sa paggawa ng gusto mo.

00:14:50.306 --> 00:14:52.349 align:center
Malakas ang bagsak natin. Okay?

00:14:52.433 --> 00:14:54.810 align:center
Malakas ang bagsak natin,
dahil gano'n tayo sinanay

00:14:54.894 --> 00:14:56.979 align:center
at 'yon talaga ang gusto nating gawin.

00:14:57.062 --> 00:14:58.355 align:center
Oo, disiplinado ako,

00:14:58.439 --> 00:15:02.401 align:center
pero gusto kong makitang
may effort sa sayaw.

00:15:02.484 --> 00:15:06.488 align:center
Ayoko 'yong mukhang madali
o masyadong perpekto o pulido.

00:15:06.572 --> 00:15:09.700 align:center
Gusto kong makita 'yon,
lalo na sa mga babae.

00:15:12.494 --> 00:15:16.165 align:center
Gusto kong makita
'yong power at effort sa ginagawa n'yo.

00:15:16.248 --> 00:15:17.541 align:center
Pero ang hirap no'n.

00:15:21.962 --> 00:15:24.673 align:center
Iconic sa 'kin ang lugar na 'to.

00:15:24.757 --> 00:15:27.092 align:center
Lumaki ako sa Idaho, sa kawalan,

00:15:27.176 --> 00:15:30.804 align:center
at nakikita ko ang Steps
sa mga dance magazine, tapos—

00:15:30.888 --> 00:15:33.974 align:center
'Yong studio na 'to.

00:15:34.058 --> 00:15:37.770 align:center
At gusto kong—
Gustong-gusto ko talagang makapunta dito.

00:15:37.853 --> 00:15:40.898 align:center
At 'yong isiping kasama ko kayo dito

00:15:40.981 --> 00:15:45.653 align:center
at iba pang mga pamilyar na mukhang
ilang taon ko nang kilala,

00:15:45.736 --> 00:15:48.072 align:center
sobrang nagpapasalamat ako.

00:15:48.155 --> 00:15:49.865 align:center
-Kayo—
-Mahal ka namin!

00:16:07.758 --> 00:16:10.135 align:center
Five, six, seven, eight…

00:16:16.850 --> 00:16:20.229 align:center
Maaaring may mga sintomas na
mula noong maagang pagkabata,

00:16:20.312 --> 00:16:22.314 align:center
pero hindi pa lubusang lumabas

00:16:22.398 --> 00:16:25.859 align:center
hanggang sumobra na sa kapasidad
ang social demands,

00:16:25.943 --> 00:16:29.863 align:center
o maaaring naitago
ng mga natutuhang pamamaraan sa pagtanda.

00:16:34.201 --> 00:16:38.872 align:center
MAAARING NAITAGO ANG MGA SINTOMAS
SA PAGTANDA

00:16:38.956 --> 00:16:40.249 align:center
Jennifer!

00:16:41.083 --> 00:16:42.668 align:center
-Hi!
-Mag-hi ka!

00:16:43.711 --> 00:16:45.129 align:center
-Okay, go!
-Hi!

00:16:45.212 --> 00:16:46.422 align:center
Tingin ka lang.

00:16:47.464 --> 00:16:49.466 align:center
-Sige na.
-Hi!

00:16:54.596 --> 00:16:56.265 align:center
Ano ba'ng problema mo?

00:17:02.730 --> 00:17:07.651 align:center
Hello mula sa paborito kong lugar
sa buong mundo.

00:17:08.235 --> 00:17:09.445 align:center
Ang happy place ko.

00:17:10.821 --> 00:17:12.156 align:center
Gustong-gusto ko rito.

00:17:14.408 --> 00:17:20.456 align:center
Mga… ala-una na ng hapon ngayong Martes.

00:17:20.539 --> 00:17:22.708 align:center
At pangalawang ligo ko na 'to.

00:17:23.917 --> 00:17:25.377 align:center
Gano'ng araw na naman.

00:17:44.730 --> 00:17:46.273 align:center
Ano'ng nararamdaman mo?

00:17:48.275 --> 00:17:49.568 align:center
Ano'ng nararamdaman mo?

00:17:51.403 --> 00:17:55.657 align:center
Ano'ng nararamdaman mo?

00:17:55.741 --> 00:17:58.619 align:center
Ang stimming ay 'yong ginagawa
ng isang tao sa katawan niya

00:17:58.702 --> 00:18:01.789 align:center
para manatiling kalmado at kontrolado.

00:18:05.876 --> 00:18:09.588 align:center
Kahit anong nakakapagpakalma sa taong 'yon

00:18:09.671 --> 00:18:12.508 align:center
ay stimulatory na uri ng pagkilos.

00:18:12.591 --> 00:18:13.425 align:center
Angas ng daliri.

00:18:14.009 --> 00:18:15.219 align:center
No'ng bata ka,

00:18:15.302 --> 00:18:19.098 align:center
tingin ko, nagse-self-stimming ka
kapag umiikot-ikot ka.

00:18:19.181 --> 00:18:21.308 align:center
At sayaw ang itinawag do'n ng parents mo.

00:18:23.852 --> 00:18:25.813 align:center
Tapusin mo 'yong sayaw mo.

00:18:38.951 --> 00:18:44.081 align:center
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

00:18:44.164 --> 00:18:46.583 align:center
Five, six, seven, eight.

00:18:46.667 --> 00:18:51.547 align:center
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight.

00:18:51.630 --> 00:18:55.175 align:center
Pwede mong bilisan 'yong balakang mo?

00:18:59.763 --> 00:19:01.431 align:center
-Ayan.
-Ang ganda.

00:19:01.515 --> 00:19:02.432 align:center
Baba.

00:19:02.516 --> 00:19:03.433 align:center
Kabila naman.

00:19:03.517 --> 00:19:04.726 align:center
Ang ganda.

00:19:04.810 --> 00:19:09.022 align:center
Step! Step, step, five!
Step, five! Kick, kick, five!

00:19:12.484 --> 00:19:19.158 align:center
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight.

00:19:19.241 --> 00:19:21.493 align:center
Okay? Gusto mong subukan na may music?

00:19:21.577 --> 00:19:23.370 align:center
One, two.

00:19:23.453 --> 00:19:26.498 align:center
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight.

00:19:26.582 --> 00:19:30.210 align:center
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight.

00:19:30.294 --> 00:19:33.755 align:center
Sobra o kulang na reaksiyon
sa sensory input

00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:37.885 align:center
o kakaibang interes
sa mga sensory aspect ng environment.

00:19:37.968 --> 00:19:41.179 align:center
Kawalan ng reaksiyon
sa sakit o temperatura.

00:19:41.263 --> 00:19:45.058 align:center
Hindi magandang reaksiyon
sa mga partikular na tunog o texture.

00:19:45.142 --> 00:19:48.395 align:center
Sobrang pag-amoy o paghawak
sa mga bagay-bagay.

00:19:48.478 --> 00:19:51.565 align:center
Pagkahumaling sa mga ilaw o galaw.

00:19:52.065 --> 00:19:53.275 align:center
Masaya ka ba?

00:19:54.193 --> 00:19:56.904 align:center
-Oo.
-Ano'ng masaya sa pagbitbit niyan?

00:19:56.987 --> 00:20:01.366 align:center
Para kasing… gusto lang
ng instinct ko na gawin 'to.

00:20:01.450 --> 00:20:05.162 align:center
'Yong vibration sa kamay ko
at 'yong tunog.

00:20:05.245 --> 00:20:06.663 align:center
Damang-dama ko.

00:20:08.916 --> 00:20:12.794 align:center
Maraming palatandaan ng social challenges.

00:20:12.878 --> 00:20:15.088 align:center
Maraming palatandaan ng sensory issues.

00:20:15.172 --> 00:20:20.302 align:center
Happy birthday, dear Jennifer

00:20:26.934 --> 00:20:27.976 align:center
Masyado bang maliwanag?

00:20:28.060 --> 00:20:30.771 align:center
Sa nakikita, naririnig, nararamdaman…

00:20:33.315 --> 00:20:35.984 align:center
-Sorry. Ipunas mo sa pantalon mo.
-Ayaw!

00:20:38.195 --> 00:20:40.614 align:center
-Jennifer, tama na.
-Yuck!

00:20:41.448 --> 00:20:43.367 align:center
-Kadiri!
-Bumalik ka na sa kotse.

00:20:43.450 --> 00:20:45.869 align:center
Mahirap i-process.

00:20:45.953 --> 00:20:48.121 align:center
-Ayos ka lang, Jenn?
-Sobra na.

00:20:48.622 --> 00:20:51.833 align:center
Parang nagshu-shut down ako.
Parang mababaliw ako.

00:20:52.918 --> 00:20:55.128 align:center
Kaya dapat ako na lang ang mamili—

00:20:55.212 --> 00:20:58.840 align:center
Hindi, pero gusto kong subukang
mag-enjoy at mamili kasama ka.

00:20:58.924 --> 00:21:02.761 align:center
Parang may kidlat sa mata ko.
Parang may kumikidlat.

00:21:02.844 --> 00:21:04.429 align:center
Parang maliwanag na ilaw.

00:21:04.513 --> 00:21:07.099 align:center
Literal na parang masisira 'yong utak ko.

00:21:07.182 --> 00:21:08.767 align:center
Tipong permanente na.

00:21:08.850 --> 00:21:10.686 align:center
Nakaka-overwhelm talaga.

00:21:10.769 --> 00:21:15.899 align:center
Sa tingin ko, matagal nang
na-overload 'yong sensory system mo.

00:21:18.193 --> 00:21:20.654 align:center
Importanteng makahanap ka
ng mga paraan para makabawi.

00:21:22.281 --> 00:21:24.700 align:center
Pero di 'yon laging healthy para sa 'yo.

00:21:25.325 --> 00:21:26.910 align:center
'Yon ang kailangan mo

00:21:26.994 --> 00:21:30.038 align:center
para kumalma, makabawi,
at makapag-process.

00:21:30.122 --> 00:21:32.874 align:center
-Ano?
-Nagke-crave lang talaga 'ko sa beer.

00:21:32.958 --> 00:21:36.420 align:center
Masama 'to. Kasi natuto akong uminom
no'ng 13 pa lang ako.

00:21:36.503 --> 00:21:39.298 align:center
Nasa dugo ko na ang pagiging manginginom.
Ang pangit lang.

00:21:39.381 --> 00:21:40.507 align:center
Naiintindihan ko.

00:21:42.843 --> 00:21:44.011 align:center
Pahingi rin, babe.

00:21:44.594 --> 00:21:48.098 align:center
Pag masyadong matindi
o di-umaayon ang mga bagay-bagay

00:21:48.181 --> 00:21:50.517 align:center
sa paraang may sense para sa gaya mo,

00:21:50.600 --> 00:21:53.186 align:center
magiging mahirap ang mundo.

00:21:58.358 --> 00:22:03.071 align:center
Bilang adult, titigil ka lang sa stimming…

00:22:03.155 --> 00:22:04.448 align:center
Sige lang.

00:22:05.157 --> 00:22:08.243 align:center
Ilabas mo. Okay lang.
Hayaan mong lumabas 'yan.

00:22:08.327 --> 00:22:11.413 align:center
Kasi hindi komportable 'yong ibang tao.

00:22:11.496 --> 00:22:13.832 align:center
O pakiramdam mo, hinuhusgahan ka.

00:22:13.915 --> 00:22:16.835 align:center
Kaya mahalaga 'yong kakayahang
makapag-regulate,

00:22:16.918 --> 00:22:22.341 align:center
mag-refuel, at magbalanse
sa napaka-healthy na paraan.

00:22:22.424 --> 00:22:24.760 align:center
Ginawa kong sayaw 'yong stimming ko.

00:22:34.853 --> 00:22:37.814 align:center
Hanapin mo 'yong balanse,
'yong gitna, kung saan ka nararapat.

00:22:38.315 --> 00:22:43.111 align:center
O magkulong ka sa isang lugar
na sa pakiramdam mo ay ligtas.

00:22:43.987 --> 00:22:46.073 align:center
Oo, madalas kong gawin 'yon noon.

00:22:46.156 --> 00:22:49.117 align:center
Gumagawa ako ng mga tambayan
para sa sarili ko.

00:22:49.201 --> 00:22:52.287 align:center
At pwedeng 'yon 'yong lugar
kung sa'n ka mapapayapa

00:22:52.370 --> 00:22:53.789 align:center
at magiginhawaan.

00:22:54.289 --> 00:22:56.958 align:center
Nakaka-relax lumabas sa nature,

00:22:57.042 --> 00:23:01.254 align:center
kaya pupunta ka sa mga lugar na 'yon
nang matagal at walang gagawin.

00:23:06.051 --> 00:23:07.427 align:center
-Ready?
-Oo!

00:23:08.762 --> 00:23:10.555 align:center
Ang ganda. Ano sa tingin mo?

00:23:10.639 --> 00:23:11.598 align:center
Gusto ko 'to.

00:23:11.681 --> 00:23:12.682 align:center
Ako din.

00:23:13.391 --> 00:23:15.394 align:center
-I love you.
-I love you.

00:23:34.871 --> 00:23:36.790 align:center
Kalimutan ang mundo.

00:23:48.343 --> 00:23:52.055 align:center
-Braso 'yan o balakang? Ano 'yan?
-Sira-sira na. Wala na.

00:23:52.139 --> 00:23:54.057 align:center
Dahil ba sa sports 'yang injury na 'yan?

00:23:54.141 --> 00:23:55.517 align:center
Oo. Dancer ako.

00:23:55.600 --> 00:23:57.811 align:center
-Parating na si Dr. Borowski.
-Okay.

00:23:58.478 --> 00:24:00.480 align:center
Maliit 'to para sa 'kin.

00:24:00.981 --> 00:24:03.984 align:center
-Maliit. Kailangan ko ng mas malaki.
-Patingin ng puwit mo.

00:24:04.067 --> 00:24:05.861 align:center
-Ikot ka.
-Ayoko.

00:24:06.361 --> 00:24:08.196 align:center
Role-play tayo, nurse at doctor.

00:24:08.280 --> 00:24:09.114 align:center
Wag na, uy.

00:24:10.991 --> 00:24:13.243 align:center
-Bali ba?
-Tapos na ba 'yong career ko?

00:24:14.995 --> 00:24:17.164 align:center
Iangat mo 'yong tuhod mo paganito.

00:24:17.247 --> 00:24:18.331 align:center
Medyo…

00:24:18.415 --> 00:24:19.291 align:center
Oo.

00:24:19.833 --> 00:24:23.295 align:center
-Okay, so…
-Masakit kapag iniaangat 'yong binti ko.

00:24:23.378 --> 00:24:24.212 align:center
Okay.

00:24:24.296 --> 00:24:26.673 align:center
Nakapagsayaw pa ako. Okay lang lahat.

00:24:26.756 --> 00:24:28.341 align:center
Gaya ng lagi niyang ginagawa.

00:24:28.425 --> 00:24:29.342 align:center
Oo. Siyempre.

00:24:29.426 --> 00:24:32.971 align:center
Sa puntong ito ng buhay ko,
isinasayaw mo lang ang sakit.

00:24:33.054 --> 00:24:34.806 align:center
May mga nangyayari dito,

00:24:34.890 --> 00:24:38.727 align:center
bale, namamaga talaga 'yong hip flexor mo,

00:24:38.810 --> 00:24:41.771 align:center
Ang payo ko, magpa-MRI na tayo ngayon.

00:24:41.855 --> 00:24:45.734 align:center
Gusto kong makasiguro
na walang stress reaction dito.

00:24:46.902 --> 00:24:49.654 align:center
Kung magiging problema 'to,
may Martha Graham siya.

00:24:49.738 --> 00:24:53.074 align:center
Bukod sa lahat ng ginagawa ko,
may nationals ako.

00:24:53.158 --> 00:24:54.367 align:center
Mag-physical therapy tayo…

00:24:54.451 --> 00:24:58.705 align:center
May 250 hanggang 400 katao
sa mga klaseng 'yon…

00:25:01.124 --> 00:25:03.126 align:center
Magiging matindi 'yon.

00:25:09.216 --> 00:25:11.259 align:center
Pagpupumilit sa pagkakapareho.

00:25:12.844 --> 00:25:15.555 align:center
Mahigpit na pagsunod sa routine.

00:25:16.723 --> 00:25:20.018 align:center
O ritualized patterns
o verbal/nonverbal behavior.

00:25:29.402 --> 00:25:32.948 align:center
-Ano'ng iniisip mo?
-Iniisip kong di interesante 'to.

00:25:33.031 --> 00:25:34.241 align:center
Ano'ng kinukunan mo?

00:25:37.953 --> 00:25:39.496 align:center
Interesante naman.

00:25:39.996 --> 00:25:40.997 align:center
Mag-empake ka.

00:25:41.873 --> 00:25:44.251 align:center
Hindi ako masayang panoorin.

00:25:44.751 --> 00:25:45.961 align:center
Isasama mo si James?

00:25:46.044 --> 00:25:46.962 align:center
Kung pwede lang.

00:25:47.796 --> 00:25:49.839 align:center
Nag-eempake si Jenn, at di siya masaya.

00:25:51.466 --> 00:25:52.968 align:center
Ano'ng iniisip mo?

00:26:01.226 --> 00:26:02.769 align:center
Nilalamon siya ng anxiety.

00:26:08.191 --> 00:26:11.736 align:center
Para sa 'yo, mahirap malaman
kung ano'ng gagawin,

00:26:11.820 --> 00:26:15.699 align:center
saan magsisimula, paano makikipag-usap,

00:26:15.782 --> 00:26:19.536 align:center
paano maiintindihan ang pananaw
ng ibang tao, sa emosyonal na lebel.

00:26:19.619 --> 00:26:23.290 align:center
Kailangan mong iproseso ang bawat tao,

00:26:23.373 --> 00:26:25.417 align:center
emosyon ng bawat tao,

00:26:25.500 --> 00:26:27.294 align:center
kuwento ng bawat tao,

00:26:27.377 --> 00:26:29.796 align:center
alamin kung ano'ng nangyayari sa paligid.

00:26:29.879 --> 00:26:32.591 align:center
At napakahirap kapag iniisip mo

00:26:32.674 --> 00:26:36.094 align:center
kung gaano kabigat para sa tao
na iproseso sa isip ang isang bagay.

00:26:36.177 --> 00:26:41.474 align:center
At para sa 'yo,
maraming pressure sa pakikipagkapwa.

00:26:41.558 --> 00:26:42.601 align:center
Marami.

00:26:54.904 --> 00:26:58.158 align:center
Finorward ang iyong tawag
sa automatic voice message system.

00:26:58.241 --> 00:27:00.327 align:center
Hi, si Alex 'to. Mag-message ka lang.

00:27:05.457 --> 00:27:07.000 align:center
Ano, Alex…

00:27:07.500 --> 00:27:09.836 align:center
Nandito ako, nagtuturo ng klase,

00:27:11.254 --> 00:27:15.342 align:center
pero di ko alam
kung ano'ng problema sa katawan ko.

00:27:16.926 --> 00:27:20.889 align:center
Isa sa mga rason kung bakit
gusto kong gumagalaw kasi mabilis lang.

00:27:20.972 --> 00:27:22.766 align:center
Pag lumabas na, tapos na.

00:27:24.434 --> 00:27:27.896 align:center
Mas masaya ako pag mas gumagalaw ako.

00:27:28.396 --> 00:27:31.775 align:center
Pero literal,
ayoko talagang gumalaw ngayon.

00:27:32.776 --> 00:27:35.904 align:center
Ayun, di ko alam kung ano'ng nangyayari.

00:27:36.738 --> 00:27:40.283 align:center
Dancers, punta kayo sa dance floor
kung magkaklase kayo.

00:27:41.951 --> 00:27:46.247 align:center
Paano ko sila mamo-motivate
kung di ko ma-motivate ang sarili ko?

00:27:47.499 --> 00:27:49.209 align:center
Anong oras ka darating dito?

00:27:57.300 --> 00:27:59.511 align:center
Bawal akong kunan habang natutulog.

00:27:59.594 --> 00:28:00.887 align:center
Gising ka naman.

00:28:04.224 --> 00:28:05.600 align:center
Good night.

00:28:05.684 --> 00:28:06.685 align:center
Bye.

00:28:06.768 --> 00:28:09.896 align:center
Sumayaw ka sa harap ng bintana,
maganda 'yong kuha.

00:28:09.979 --> 00:28:10.855 align:center
Parang…

00:28:10.939 --> 00:28:13.316 align:center
Kita ko 'yong silhouette mo,
parang si Beyoncé.

00:28:13.817 --> 00:28:14.901 align:center
Wish ko lang.

00:28:15.402 --> 00:28:17.195 align:center
Lagi akong humihiling ng bathtub.

00:28:17.696 --> 00:28:20.407 align:center
Kaya ako binalik sa building na 'to
kasi tingin ko—

00:28:20.490 --> 00:28:23.201 align:center
-Bathtub building 'to?
-Bathtub building nga.

00:28:23.284 --> 00:28:25.870 align:center
Nagka-panic attack ako kagabi.

00:28:25.954 --> 00:28:28.748 align:center
Ang tanga nga kasi prepared naman ako.

00:28:28.832 --> 00:28:31.000 align:center
Mahigit isang dekada ko nang ginagawa 'to.

00:28:31.084 --> 00:28:33.086 align:center
-Oo.
-Pero hindi talaga—

00:28:33.169 --> 00:28:35.714 align:center
Para sa 'kin,
pahirap nang pahirap. Di dumadali.

00:28:35.797 --> 00:28:37.716 align:center
-Talaga? Bakit?
-Oo, ewan ko.

00:28:37.799 --> 00:28:39.050 align:center
Siguro…

00:28:39.676 --> 00:28:42.345 align:center
Di lang talaga dumadali.
Kasi pakiramdam ko—

00:28:42.846 --> 00:28:44.389 align:center
Mas maraming ine-expect sa 'yo?

00:28:44.472 --> 00:28:46.433 align:center
Di ine-expect, pero…

00:28:48.268 --> 00:28:51.396 align:center
Parang di talaga para sa 'kin
'yong wala akong gaanong effort.

00:28:51.479 --> 00:28:54.149 align:center
Lagi pa rin akong sumusubok ng bago.

00:28:54.232 --> 00:28:55.650 align:center
-Oo.
-Kaya…

00:28:55.734 --> 00:28:58.403 align:center
-Pero ayaw mo na bang mag-effort?
-Hindi.

00:28:59.112 --> 00:29:00.238 align:center
Ganito…

00:29:00.822 --> 00:29:02.615 align:center
Huminga tayo nang sabay-sabay.

00:29:04.659 --> 00:29:05.910 align:center
Exhale.

00:29:07.370 --> 00:29:12.083 align:center
Alalahanin n'yo lang saglit
kung bakit kayo nandito.

00:29:14.669 --> 00:29:16.880 align:center
Di ka na ba umiinom?

00:29:18.673 --> 00:29:20.550 align:center
-Oo.
-Ayos.

00:29:21.676 --> 00:29:23.553 align:center
-Mga tatlong taon na.
-Okay.

00:29:24.179 --> 00:29:25.805 align:center
Bakit ka tumigil?

00:29:26.723 --> 00:29:27.849 align:center
Kailangan, e.

00:29:29.934 --> 00:29:33.730 align:center
Gusto ko talagang makita kayong
maging parte ng galaw.

00:29:33.813 --> 00:29:37.609 align:center
Namnamin n'yo mula sa loob n'yo,
angkinin n'yo mula umpisa.

00:29:37.692 --> 00:29:41.112 align:center
Gusto ko ring wag nang uminom,
pero nahihirapan ako.

00:29:41.196 --> 00:29:45.533 align:center
Gusto kong itodo n'yo
'yong approach n'yo, 'yong sigla n'yo.

00:29:45.617 --> 00:29:48.286 align:center
Wag n'yong isipin ang sarili n'yo.
Dapat maantig ang iba.

00:29:48.369 --> 00:29:49.412 align:center
Gets n'yo ba?

00:29:49.496 --> 00:29:52.624 align:center
Na-realize kong nagsimula akong
uminom no'ng college,

00:29:52.707 --> 00:29:56.753 align:center
kung sa'n napilitan akong
maging parte ng social community.

00:29:57.712 --> 00:29:58.671 align:center
Mismo.

00:29:59.255 --> 00:30:02.467 align:center
Kaya talagang dumepende ako do'n
na tulungan ako.

00:30:02.550 --> 00:30:03.384 align:center
Ako rin.

00:30:04.302 --> 00:30:05.470 align:center
Mas okay na wala 'yon,

00:30:06.429 --> 00:30:09.140 align:center
pero hindi naman mas madali.

00:30:10.058 --> 00:30:12.101 align:center
Totoo. Pabalik-balik din ako.

00:30:12.185 --> 00:30:15.313 align:center
At parang gusto ko nang matapos.

00:30:15.396 --> 00:30:16.231 align:center
Oo.

00:30:16.898 --> 00:30:17.982 align:center
Gusto ko nang matapos.

00:30:18.733 --> 00:30:21.694 align:center
Five, six, seven. Eto na.

00:30:21.778 --> 00:30:24.572 align:center
One, two, three, four.

00:30:24.656 --> 00:30:25.949 align:center
Liyad,

00:30:26.032 --> 00:30:27.450 align:center
yuko, ulit.

00:30:28.785 --> 00:30:30.036 align:center
Three, four.

00:30:30.119 --> 00:30:31.162 align:center
Liyad,

00:30:31.704 --> 00:30:33.081 align:center
yuko, ulit.

00:30:33.164 --> 00:30:35.625 align:center
Di lang 'to paggalaw.

00:30:35.708 --> 00:30:37.335 align:center
Gusto kong makita 'yong labanan.

00:30:37.418 --> 00:30:38.753 align:center
Liyad. Ulit.

00:30:40.255 --> 00:30:42.715 align:center
Three, four. Liyad.

00:30:42.799 --> 00:30:44.425 align:center
Yuko, ulit.

00:30:45.218 --> 00:30:49.264 align:center
-Gaano na kayo katagal na magkasama?
-Mga ten, 11 years.

00:30:49.347 --> 00:30:50.348 align:center
Ulit.

00:30:50.431 --> 00:30:52.225 align:center
Kilala ko na si Tay, 12 pa lang siya.

00:30:52.308 --> 00:30:53.935 align:center
-Ilang taon ka na?
-24.

00:30:54.018 --> 00:30:56.271 align:center
Twelve pa lang siya, choreo na niya 'ko.

00:30:56.354 --> 00:30:57.480 align:center
Okay. Three.

00:30:57.564 --> 00:31:01.150 align:center
Ganiyan. May kung ano sa focus mo.
Sobrang ganda nito.

00:31:02.443 --> 00:31:04.112 align:center
Three, four.

00:31:04.195 --> 00:31:05.530 align:center
Liyad,

00:31:05.613 --> 00:31:06.948 align:center
yuko, ulit.

00:31:07.031 --> 00:31:09.784 align:center
One, two, three, four.

00:31:09.868 --> 00:31:10.952 align:center
Liyad,

00:31:11.035 --> 00:31:12.579 align:center
yuko, ulit.

00:31:14.080 --> 00:31:15.415 align:center
Three, four.

00:31:15.498 --> 00:31:18.209 align:center
Liyad, yuko, ulit.

00:31:18.293 --> 00:31:22.088 align:center
One, two, three, four. Liyad…

00:31:22.171 --> 00:31:24.674 align:center
Nagdulot ng matitinding pinsala
ang mga sintomas

00:31:24.757 --> 00:31:26.843 align:center
sa pakikipagkapwa, trabaho,

00:31:26.926 --> 00:31:29.721 align:center
o iba pang importanteng aspekto
ng kasalukuyang pag-function.

00:31:29.804 --> 00:31:32.348 align:center
One, two, three, four.

00:31:32.432 --> 00:31:35.435 align:center
Liyad, yuko, ulit.

00:31:36.853 --> 00:31:40.690 align:center
Three, four. Liyad, yuko, ulit.

00:31:40.773 --> 00:31:44.402 align:center
One, two, three, four, five…

00:31:44.485 --> 00:31:45.820 align:center
Jenn, okay ka lang?

00:31:45.904 --> 00:31:47.113 align:center
…eight…

00:31:48.156 --> 00:31:51.159 align:center
-Ayaw mo bang mag-rehearse?
-Hindi, gusto ko. Kaso…

00:31:52.035 --> 00:31:53.870 align:center
Parang nababaliw ako.

00:31:55.622 --> 00:31:57.790 align:center
Ano'ng nakakabaliw sa 'yo, honey?

00:31:58.458 --> 00:31:59.792 align:center
Ewan ko.

00:32:04.839 --> 00:32:07.717 align:center
Okay lang na nagpa-panic minsan.

00:32:24.359 --> 00:32:27.403 align:center
Parang mas madalas na
'yong panic attacks niya.

00:32:28.154 --> 00:32:30.657 align:center
At kakaumpisa pa lang ng araw,

00:32:31.449 --> 00:32:35.244 align:center
kaya humiga kami sa sofa
para makahinga siya.

00:32:36.079 --> 00:32:37.580 align:center
Hinanda ko ang pampaligo niya.

00:32:39.082 --> 00:32:41.167 align:center
Sumayaw nang naka-underwear konti.

00:32:42.126 --> 00:32:45.505 align:center
Sinubukan kong gulatin 'yong utak niya
sa pangit na tanawing 'yon.

00:32:46.047 --> 00:32:49.175 align:center
Natawa siya konti, pero—
Alam mo 'yon, di nagtatagal.

00:32:49.258 --> 00:32:50.343 align:center
Ano'ng nararamdaman mo?

00:32:50.927 --> 00:32:52.971 align:center
Pakiramdam ko, wala akong kontrol.

00:32:53.054 --> 00:32:55.723 align:center
Mas mabilis 'yong emosyon ko
kaysa sinasabi ko.

00:32:55.807 --> 00:32:57.225 align:center
-Oo.
-'Yon 'yong mahirap.

00:32:57.308 --> 00:32:58.309 align:center
Oo.

00:32:58.393 --> 00:33:02.480 align:center
Di mo napapansing
nangyayari lahat ng 'to sa loob mo,

00:33:02.563 --> 00:33:07.151 align:center
tapos pinu-push mo ang sarili mo,
na kapag lumabas na 'yon,

00:33:07.235 --> 00:33:08.861 align:center
magtataka ka, "Ano 'to?"

00:33:08.945 --> 00:33:12.115 align:center
Pero matagal na 'to.
Di lang napag-uusapan.

00:33:12.198 --> 00:33:13.282 align:center
-Oo.
-Ayun.

00:33:13.366 --> 00:33:15.868 align:center
-Saka di ko alam kung ano 'yong emosyon.
-Oo.

00:33:15.952 --> 00:33:18.746 align:center
Parang… malawak lang.

00:33:26.713 --> 00:33:29.757 align:center
Parang sobra lang talaga.
Ewan ko kung pa'no niya nakakaya.

00:33:49.152 --> 00:33:50.570 align:center
Ang sakit.

00:34:11.257 --> 00:34:12.759 align:center
Ang sakit huminga.

00:34:19.474 --> 00:34:21.392 align:center
Medyo masakit lang, ha?

00:34:24.812 --> 00:34:26.439 align:center
Galing mo, babe. Good job.

00:34:26.522 --> 00:34:28.649 align:center
Nagkaroon ng autoimmune flare-up si Jenn,

00:34:28.733 --> 00:34:31.277 align:center
kaya nalamang may gallstones siya.

00:34:31.360 --> 00:34:33.988 align:center
Ngayon, nagpa-emergency surgery kami
para matanggal na.

00:34:34.072 --> 00:34:35.948 align:center
Kaya, medyo…

00:34:36.032 --> 00:34:37.867 align:center
Matindi ang tama niya ngayon.

00:34:43.748 --> 00:34:44.665 align:center
Bababa na tayo.

00:34:53.299 --> 00:34:56.511 align:center
Hindi mo kontrolado ang button na 'to.

00:34:57.094 --> 00:35:00.181 align:center
Pupunta ako sa White Plains para kay Alex

00:35:00.264 --> 00:35:03.017 align:center
dahil nasa ER siya ngayon sa White Plains,

00:35:03.101 --> 00:35:06.729 align:center
at out-of-town si Miguel,
'yong asawa niya, dahil sa trabaho.

00:35:07.313 --> 00:35:10.983 align:center
Kaya… ako ang pupunta
para masigurong okay siya.

00:35:12.443 --> 00:35:13.277 align:center
Hi.

00:35:13.903 --> 00:35:15.196 align:center
Pambihira tayong dalawa.

00:35:16.656 --> 00:35:17.615 align:center
-Uy.
-Oo nga.

00:35:19.200 --> 00:35:21.410 align:center
-Uy.
-Ano'ng nangyari?

00:35:21.994 --> 00:35:24.789 align:center
Nasa ospital din ako.

00:35:26.749 --> 00:35:29.001 align:center
Pupuntahan kita kung wala lang akong tahi.

00:35:29.085 --> 00:35:30.294 align:center
Totoo.

00:35:31.504 --> 00:35:33.422 align:center
Kararating ko lang sa bahay ni Alex.

00:35:36.175 --> 00:35:37.176 align:center
Inasikaso ko siya.

00:35:37.260 --> 00:35:39.262 align:center
Ia-admit siya sa ospital.

00:35:39.345 --> 00:35:42.181 align:center
Na-admit na pala siya.

00:35:44.267 --> 00:35:45.601 align:center
May brain MRIs.

00:35:45.685 --> 00:35:48.604 align:center
Hindi siya okay ngayon.

00:35:49.772 --> 00:35:51.983 align:center
Sa tingin ko, di lang 'yon burnout.

00:35:53.734 --> 00:35:55.486 align:center
Siguradong natatakot siya.

00:35:55.570 --> 00:35:58.823 align:center
At alam kong nagmamadali si Miguel
na makabalik bukas.

00:36:01.409 --> 00:36:03.244 align:center
At pagkatapos ni Jenn,

00:36:03.786 --> 00:36:07.623 align:center
at 'yong nakakatakot
na gallbladder surgery na 'yon,

00:36:08.749 --> 00:36:10.960 align:center
parang lahat ng mahahalaga sa 'kin,

00:36:11.043 --> 00:36:12.420 align:center
may pinagdadaanan.

00:36:14.422 --> 00:36:16.507 align:center
-Gusto mong makita 'yong hiwa?
-Siyempre.

00:36:16.591 --> 00:36:19.802 align:center
Dito nila kinuha 'yong gallbladder.

00:36:19.886 --> 00:36:21.095 align:center
Ay, interesting.

00:36:21.179 --> 00:36:22.138 align:center
Ang guwapo mo.

00:36:22.221 --> 00:36:23.973 align:center
May filter ka ba?

00:36:24.473 --> 00:36:25.308 align:center
Wala.

00:36:25.391 --> 00:36:27.977 align:center
Parehong linggo, parehong nasa ospital.

00:36:28.060 --> 00:36:30.396 align:center
Gusto ko lang makita kayo, kasi—

00:36:30.479 --> 00:36:36.235 align:center
Sobrang hirap nitong mga linggong 'to,
at alam mo naman, mama bear si Ian.

00:36:37.361 --> 00:36:39.030 align:center
Kumusta ka? Ano'ng nararamdaman mo?

00:36:39.113 --> 00:36:40.907 align:center
Nag-reload ako kahapon at kanina.

00:36:40.990 --> 00:36:47.205 align:center
Konting galaw lang,
para nga lang akong naglalakad.

00:36:47.288 --> 00:36:49.999 align:center
Nakakatawa, pareho tayo ng posisyon,

00:36:50.082 --> 00:36:53.753 align:center
kasi sinusubukan ko lang
maglakad nang deretso.

00:36:53.836 --> 00:36:55.212 align:center
-Friend.
-Bale, mag…

00:36:55.296 --> 00:36:56.464 align:center
Ano'ng nangyayari?

00:36:56.547 --> 00:37:00.843 align:center
Meron ako no'ng tinatawag na—
Do— Ano nga 'yon, Ian?

00:37:00.927 --> 00:37:02.178 align:center
Guillain-Barré.

00:37:02.261 --> 00:37:04.513 align:center
Guillain-Barré, ang ganda pakinggan.

00:37:04.597 --> 00:37:08.851 align:center
So, parang sumosobra
'yong autoimmune response mo

00:37:08.935 --> 00:37:13.064 align:center
tapos inaatake 'yong nerve cells
na nagpapagalaw sa muscles mo.

00:37:13.147 --> 00:37:15.274 align:center
Parang wala kang proprioception.

00:37:15.358 --> 00:37:19.153 align:center
Oo, wala akong ideya
kung ano 'yon, pero oo.

00:37:19.654 --> 00:37:22.865 align:center
Parang 'yong katawan mo,
"Letse, aatakihin namin lahat dito."

00:37:22.949 --> 00:37:23.950 align:center
Nag-ooveract.

00:37:24.033 --> 00:37:26.369 align:center
Pwedeng makaparalisa.

00:37:27.245 --> 00:37:30.581 align:center
Lagi pa nating pinag-uusapan
'yong mind-body connection.

00:37:30.665 --> 00:37:33.250 align:center
Nagiging malinaw 'yong mga bagay na 'yon,

00:37:33.334 --> 00:37:37.088 align:center
kasi kailangan mong tukuyin
kung ano'ng mahalaga sa 'yo

00:37:37.171 --> 00:37:38.089 align:center
at gawin 'yon.

00:37:38.172 --> 00:37:40.258 align:center
-Totoo.
-Habang kaya mo pa.

00:37:40.341 --> 00:37:41.592 align:center
Tama.

00:37:47.139 --> 00:37:49.308 align:center
'Yan, ituloy mo lang.

00:37:50.768 --> 00:37:51.769 align:center
Gusto ko 'yan.

00:37:54.063 --> 00:37:58.484 align:center
No'ng bata ako, pakiramdam ko lagi,
outsider ako sa pamilya ko

00:37:58.567 --> 00:38:00.695 align:center
o hindi nila ako naiintindihan.

00:38:02.279 --> 00:38:06.409 align:center
Kaya sobrang halaga sa 'kin
ng pinili kong pamilya.

00:38:06.492 --> 00:38:08.411 align:center
Matagal na kaming magkakilala.

00:38:09.203 --> 00:38:10.454 align:center
-Sa'n ka punta?
-Sa taas.

00:38:10.538 --> 00:38:12.540 align:center
-Gaano kataas?
-Sobrang taas.

00:38:13.791 --> 00:38:16.294 align:center
Six, seven, and eight, tapos ganito.

00:38:17.086 --> 00:38:20.423 align:center
'Yong ligayang 'yon, sa tingin ko,
kapag lalo mong hinayaan ang sarili mo

00:38:20.506 --> 00:38:24.468 align:center
na bumalik sa kung ano
'yong nagpapasaya sa 'yo sa field mo,

00:38:24.552 --> 00:38:26.804 align:center
mahahanap mo ulit 'yong ligayang 'yon.

00:38:30.558 --> 00:38:33.978 align:center
Hanapin mo 'yong gusto mo do'n,
kausapin mo ang mga nagpapasaya sa 'yo,

00:38:34.061 --> 00:38:36.230 align:center
at makisama ka sa kanila

00:38:36.314 --> 00:38:40.151 align:center
at subukang mag-enjoy
at hanapin uli 'yong saya sa ginagawa mo.

00:38:47.992 --> 00:38:48.951 align:center
Wow.

00:38:50.077 --> 00:38:54.665 align:center
Oo, ang hirap i-process no'n.

00:38:56.292 --> 00:38:57.626 align:center
Magiging okay ka ba?

00:38:57.710 --> 00:38:58.711 align:center
Oo naman.

00:38:59.670 --> 00:39:01.839 align:center
-Pasensiya na.
-Ayos lang.

00:39:01.922 --> 00:39:03.716 align:center
-Gano'n talaga.
-Oo.

00:39:04.508 --> 00:39:07.845 align:center
Di mo mararamdaman 'yong saya
kung di mo nararamdaman 'yong lungkot.

00:39:09.472 --> 00:39:12.475 align:center
Kailangan talagang magbigay
ng inspirational quotes?

00:39:12.558 --> 00:39:13.559 align:center
Oo.

00:39:13.642 --> 00:39:15.978 align:center
Ano pang quotes
ang dapat malaman ng mga tao?

00:39:16.062 --> 00:39:17.188 align:center
Alam mo…

00:39:19.190 --> 00:39:22.276 align:center
Lagi kong iniisip,
at original idea 'to, ha…

00:39:24.987 --> 00:39:28.866 align:center
simulan mo ang pagbabagong
gusto mong makita sa mundo.

00:39:30.368 --> 00:39:31.911 align:center
-Wow. Ang lalim no'n.
-Oo.

00:39:33.079 --> 00:39:37.249 align:center
Simulan mo ang pagbabagong
gusto mong makita sa mundo.

00:39:42.922 --> 00:39:47.426 align:center
Kung paggalaw ang nagsasabi
ng mga kuwento at mga emosyon mo,

00:39:47.510 --> 00:39:50.054 align:center
tingin ko, 'yon ang dapat mong gawin.

00:39:50.930 --> 00:39:53.891 align:center
Alam ko na… kung ano'ng gagawin.

00:39:55.643 --> 00:39:59.397 align:center
Parang may mensahe akong
kailangang i-share,

00:39:59.480 --> 00:40:01.857 align:center
kaya alam kong
di pa nawawala ang pagsayaw ko.

00:40:02.608 --> 00:40:04.485 align:center
Talagang di pa 'yan nawawala.

00:40:06.112 --> 00:40:09.907 align:center
Sinasabi nito kung ano'ng
kailangan mong gawin para sa sarili mo.

00:40:18.749 --> 00:40:23.963 align:center
Pagsasayaw ang gamit ko para maintindihan
ang mundo at ang papel ko dito.

00:40:24.755 --> 00:40:26.841 align:center
Marami akong natutuhan.

00:40:29.552 --> 00:40:31.679 align:center
Gusto kong i-share 'yon sa mundo.

00:40:33.055 --> 00:40:34.890 align:center
Panahon na para may gawin ako.

00:40:35.850 --> 00:40:37.768 align:center
Mahahanap mo uli 'yong saya.

00:40:39.854 --> 00:40:40.771 align:center
Simulan na natin.

00:40:41.355 --> 00:40:46.902 align:center
Kayang-kaya mo 'to
Kayang-kaya mo 'to, gusto mo 'to

00:40:46.986 --> 00:40:51.365 align:center
Walang hanggan ang mga posibilidad

00:40:51.449 --> 00:40:52.366 align:center
Ano sila?

00:40:52.450 --> 00:40:53.451 align:center
Walang hanggan!

00:40:53.534 --> 00:40:54.452 align:center
Ano tayo?

00:40:54.535 --> 00:40:55.411 align:center
-Perfect
-Perfect

00:40:55.494 --> 00:40:58.539 align:center
Mga taong perfect
Sa perfect na lugar

00:40:58.622 --> 00:41:02.626 align:center
At pinupapurihan namin ito nang may dangal

00:41:02.710 --> 00:41:03.586 align:center
At…

00:41:07.715 --> 00:41:09.133 align:center
Ayos!

00:41:10.134 --> 00:41:14.180 align:center
Lahat ng pinapakita n'yo,
magic, maganda, at nakatadhana.

00:41:14.263 --> 00:41:16.223 align:center
Salamat sa pag-oo n'yo.

00:41:16.891 --> 00:41:18.684 align:center
Magpakitang-gilas tayo.

00:41:19.602 --> 00:41:20.686 align:center
Sige.

00:41:20.769 --> 00:41:26.984 align:center
Gusto mo bang ikuwento sa grupo
kung paano mo nalaman?

00:41:27.067 --> 00:41:30.196 align:center
No'ng ma-realize kong ganito ako,

00:41:30.279 --> 00:41:34.575 align:center
wala talaga akong alam… tungkol sa autism,

00:41:35.075 --> 00:41:36.702 align:center
walang-wala talaga.

00:41:36.785 --> 00:41:38.871 align:center
Baka alam na
ng marami sa inyo 'yong kuwento,

00:41:38.954 --> 00:41:41.832 align:center
pero na-realize kong baka may autism ako

00:41:41.916 --> 00:41:45.377 align:center
do'n sa docu-series ni Alex
tungkol kay Amy Schumer.

00:41:47.129 --> 00:41:50.341 align:center
Tungkol 'yon sa pagbubuntis ni Amy,
paggawa ng comedy special,

00:41:50.424 --> 00:41:54.470 align:center
pero may sidebar sa pelikula
tungkol sa asawa ni Amy na si Chris.

00:41:54.553 --> 00:42:00.434 align:center
At sa pelikula, nakatanggap siya
ng diagnosis ng autism spectrum disorder.

00:42:01.644 --> 00:42:05.856 align:center
'Yong paglabas no'n sa documentary,
sobrang— Biglaan lang.

00:42:05.940 --> 00:42:07.441 align:center
Mahal niya ang lalaking 'to.

00:42:07.525 --> 00:42:09.652 align:center
Nagkaproblema sa komunikasyon nila.

00:42:09.735 --> 00:42:11.070 align:center
Kaya nagpunta sila sa doktor.

00:42:11.153 --> 00:42:14.323 align:center
At habang pinapanood ko 'yong episode,

00:42:14.406 --> 00:42:17.743 align:center
naisip ko na baka may autism din ako.

00:42:17.826 --> 00:42:21.163 align:center
Hindi ko pa naisip 'to sa sarili ko dati.

00:42:21.664 --> 00:42:25.334 align:center
Habang pinapanood kita… na magsalita

00:42:25.417 --> 00:42:29.129 align:center
tapos kung pa'no ka ikuwento
ng pamilya mo.

00:42:29.213 --> 00:42:31.423 align:center
Di— Di ko pa rin alam kung ano 'yon.

00:42:31.507 --> 00:42:36.637 align:center
At naisip ko no'n,
"Nakaka-relate ako sa nangyayari."

00:42:36.720 --> 00:42:41.308 align:center
Malalaman nilang iba ka,
pero di nila sasabihin 'yon sa 'yo.

00:42:41.392 --> 00:42:47.606 align:center
Kung may kasama kang nasa spectrum,
kailangan mong mahalin 'yon.

00:42:47.690 --> 00:42:49.567 align:center
Nalaman ko 'to sa sarili ko

00:42:49.650 --> 00:42:52.444 align:center
dahil may naglakas-loob
na i-share 'yong kuwento nila.

00:42:52.528 --> 00:42:54.280 align:center
Kaya gusto kong gawin 'tong show.

00:42:54.363 --> 00:42:55.906 align:center
Naalala ko, no'ng ma-realize ko,

00:42:55.990 --> 00:42:59.410 align:center
literal na parang bumuka 'yong lupa.

00:42:59.493 --> 00:43:02.288 align:center
Parang karamihan ng mga realization mo—

00:43:02.371 --> 00:43:03.831 align:center
Sa gano'n kalaking bagay,

00:43:03.914 --> 00:43:08.210 align:center
pakiramdam mo,
bumabagsak sa 'yo ang mundo,

00:43:08.294 --> 00:43:10.921 align:center
pero para sa 'yo, parang bumuka ito.

00:43:11.005 --> 00:43:13.757 align:center
At sa tingin ko,
may kung anong napakaganda

00:43:13.841 --> 00:43:19.263 align:center
do'n sa kailangan mong maramdamang
totoo ang nararamdaman at nakikita mo,

00:43:20.097 --> 00:43:21.724 align:center
at sabihing, "Utak ko 'to."

00:43:22.224 --> 00:43:27.313 align:center
Isang katangian ng autism,
lalo na sa Level 1, ay masking.

00:43:27.396 --> 00:43:29.732 align:center
Magkasama 'yon.

00:43:29.815 --> 00:43:34.737 align:center
'Yong ideya na hindi ka "pwedeng"
maging totoo sa sarili mo.

00:43:34.820 --> 00:43:39.616 align:center
Kaya nagiging ugali mo nang itago
ang iba't ibang aspekto ng sarili mo.

00:43:39.700 --> 00:43:43.287 align:center
At sa paglipas ng panahon,
lumalala 'yon nang lumalala,

00:43:43.370 --> 00:43:46.874 align:center
di mo namamalayang ginagawa mo na siya.

00:43:47.374 --> 00:43:50.336 align:center
Pag na-realize mo na 'yon
at gusto mo nang tumigil,

00:43:50.419 --> 00:43:52.004 align:center
halos imposible na.

00:43:52.087 --> 00:43:55.424 align:center
Pati 'yong ideya na malaman kung sino ka

00:43:55.507 --> 00:43:59.636 align:center
sa ilalim ng lahat ng 'yon,
parang imposible rin.

00:44:01.305 --> 00:44:04.600 align:center
May footage kami
mula sa ultrasound ni Jenn.

00:44:04.683 --> 00:44:06.602 align:center
Kinunan ng tatay niya lahat.

00:44:06.685 --> 00:44:09.021 align:center
Ano 'yong ginagawa mo?

00:44:10.189 --> 00:44:12.066 align:center
Mahirap ipaliwanag.

00:44:12.566 --> 00:44:16.695 align:center
Sinusubukan kong bumuo ng analysis
environment ng diagnosis ni Jenn,

00:44:16.779 --> 00:44:21.200 align:center
isang expression kung paano siya
naka-survive sa pamamagitan ng paggalaw

00:44:21.283 --> 00:44:24.953 align:center
at paano niya nabuo
'yong marami sa vocabulary niya

00:44:25.037 --> 00:44:29.416 align:center
sa pamamagitan ng stimming,
tics, anxieties niya.

00:44:29.500 --> 00:44:33.003 align:center
No'ng bata pa ako,
gustong-gusto ko pag nahihilo ako.

00:44:33.087 --> 00:44:35.673 align:center
Nawawala lahat, literal.

00:44:36.298 --> 00:44:38.133 align:center
Kaya pag-aaral ito ng evolution

00:44:38.217 --> 00:44:41.845 align:center
ng pagkakaintindi niya sa paggalaw
nang hindi niya napapansin.

00:44:43.180 --> 00:44:47.726 align:center
Parang gumagalaw ako no'n
base sa instinct,

00:44:47.810 --> 00:44:50.062 align:center
at ngayong binabalikan ko 'yon,

00:44:50.145 --> 00:44:52.564 align:center
naiintindihan ko na
'yong nararamdaman ko no'n.

00:44:55.442 --> 00:44:59.405 align:center
Pero ginamit mo 'yong sayaw
para makontrol 'yong sarili mo

00:44:59.488 --> 00:45:02.783 align:center
mula noong bata ka gamit ang paggalaw
sa mga kamay mo at pag-ikot-ikot.

00:45:02.866 --> 00:45:03.784 align:center
Ikot!

00:45:03.867 --> 00:45:05.160 align:center
Naging positibo 'yon.

00:45:05.244 --> 00:45:07.871 align:center
Kaya parang nai-connect ka ng pagsasayaw

00:45:07.955 --> 00:45:12.668 align:center
sa maraming tao sa mundo ng sayaw, tipong,
"Oo, gusto ka naming maging kaibigan,"

00:45:12.751 --> 00:45:15.504 align:center
dahil gustong-gusto mo 'yong gusto nila.

00:45:15.587 --> 00:45:17.589 align:center
Paikutin mo ako!

00:45:18.090 --> 00:45:21.135 align:center
'Yon 'yong pinakanaisip ko talaga.

00:45:21.218 --> 00:45:23.011 align:center
No'ng ginagawa ko 'yong mga 'yon,

00:45:23.095 --> 00:45:25.264 align:center
sabi ng mga tao, sumasayaw ako.

00:45:25.347 --> 00:45:27.474 align:center
Nai-connect ka ng paulit-ulit na paggalaw.

00:45:27.558 --> 00:45:30.686 align:center
At sa tingin ko sa sayaw mo,
communication mo 'yon,

00:45:30.769 --> 00:45:34.815 align:center
nai-connect ka no'n sa maraming tao
kasi di mo kailangang gumamit ng salita.

00:45:34.898 --> 00:45:36.984 align:center
Katawan ang ipinangkukuwento mo.

00:45:37.651 --> 00:45:40.779 align:center
Indibidwal kang tumitingin
sa ibang indibidwal

00:45:40.863 --> 00:45:43.907 align:center
na mas madaling makipagkapwa-tao,

00:45:43.991 --> 00:45:46.952 align:center
pero di nila nakikita ang mundo
sa paraang gaya ng iyo.

00:45:47.035 --> 00:45:49.913 align:center
May dapat ipagdiwang
at di dapat tingnan sa negatibong paraan,

00:45:49.997 --> 00:45:51.290 align:center
dahil maganda sila.

00:45:51.373 --> 00:45:52.791 align:center
Dr. Kim…

00:45:52.875 --> 00:45:55.794 align:center
-Di ba?
-Pwede nating pag-usapan si Dr. Kim?

00:45:55.878 --> 00:45:58.255 align:center
Maganda 'yong sinabi mo para i-reassure

00:45:58.338 --> 00:46:01.341 align:center
'yong taong may bagong nalaman

00:46:01.425 --> 00:46:04.511 align:center
na literal na pwedeng
makapagbago ng buhay niya.

00:46:10.601 --> 00:46:12.561 align:center
-Ayun.
-Perfection.

00:46:14.605 --> 00:46:20.194 align:center
Si Sonya, lagi siyang nandiyan
sa career at buhay ko.

00:46:20.944 --> 00:46:25.824 align:center
Walang parte ng piyesang ito
ang mabubuo kung di kami nagkasama.

00:46:28.619 --> 00:46:30.621 align:center
Sabi niya sa akin no'n sa bahay ko,

00:46:30.704 --> 00:46:31.997 align:center
akala ko…

00:46:35.459 --> 00:46:38.337 align:center
Sabi niya, "May sasabihin ako sa 'yo."
Sabi ko, "Ay, puta."

00:46:41.507 --> 00:46:43.258 align:center
Sumeryoso siya.

00:46:43.342 --> 00:46:45.719 align:center
Tapos ano 'yong tanong ko? "Buntis ka?"

00:46:45.803 --> 00:46:47.137 align:center
-"Aalis ka na?"
-Oo.

00:46:47.221 --> 00:46:48.096 align:center
Ano'ng ginawa ko?

00:46:48.180 --> 00:46:50.474 align:center
-Ang dami kong tanong.
-Oo.

00:46:50.557 --> 00:46:53.644 align:center
-Sabi ko, "May autism ako."
-Tapos sabi ko, "O!"

00:46:53.727 --> 00:46:54.978 align:center
-Oo nga, "O!"
-"O!"

00:46:56.688 --> 00:46:59.900 align:center
"Ayos. Okay. Ano na?"

00:47:01.485 --> 00:47:03.070 align:center
'Yon 'yong nakakabaliw.

00:47:03.153 --> 00:47:07.032 align:center
Di 'yong mismong diagnosis
at experience ng pagkakaro'n ng autism.

00:47:07.115 --> 00:47:11.370 align:center
'Yong halos 34 years ng buhay mo
na di mo alam.

00:47:11.870 --> 00:47:13.580 align:center
Marami na kaming napagdaanan,

00:47:13.664 --> 00:47:15.707 align:center
at parte din nito ang mga karanasang 'yon.

00:47:15.791 --> 00:47:17.417 align:center
KLASE NI SONYA
15 TAON ANG NAKALIPAS

00:47:18.585 --> 00:47:21.964 align:center
'Yong mga hirap niya
sa pagkakaibigan namin at sa trabaho.

00:47:22.047 --> 00:47:24.800 align:center
Sana lang nalaman ko noon

00:47:26.009 --> 00:47:29.721 align:center
kasi 'yong magkaroon ng awareness

00:47:29.805 --> 00:47:36.395 align:center
di lang tungkol sa paano niya masusulit
ang buhay niya at mapapagaan 'yon…

00:47:39.106 --> 00:47:40.816 align:center
Tipong mas magaan nang konti.

00:47:42.693 --> 00:47:43.861 align:center
Di ko alam.

00:47:44.736 --> 00:47:46.238 align:center
'Yon 'yong point.

00:47:46.321 --> 00:47:50.409 align:center
Kung di mo alam, di ka makakapagsimula.

00:47:50.492 --> 00:47:52.744 align:center
-Wala kang chance.
-Oo.

00:47:52.828 --> 00:47:55.163 align:center
Ang malupit, nalulungkot ka dahil do'n,

00:47:55.247 --> 00:47:58.125 align:center
pero ikaw nga
ang pinakanakakaintindi sa 'kin.

00:47:59.710 --> 00:48:01.086 align:center
Ang ironic.

00:48:02.087 --> 00:48:03.964 align:center
Gawin natin 'tong show na 'to.

00:48:05.549 --> 00:48:06.800 align:center
Nating dalawa.

00:48:08.176 --> 00:48:10.262 align:center
Wag kang lumapit, iiyak ako.

00:48:10.345 --> 00:48:12.681 align:center
Mahal kita
Pero mahihibang ka

00:48:12.764 --> 00:48:17.060 align:center
Gagawin ko 'to
Mala-musical theater ang atake

00:48:17.144 --> 00:48:19.313 align:center
Baka hindi ka umiyak

00:48:34.536 --> 00:48:37.748 align:center
Nakakaranas ako ng matinding burnout

00:48:37.831 --> 00:48:40.584 align:center
sa lebel na di ko pa nararanasan dati.

00:48:40.667 --> 00:48:43.003 align:center
Literal na di na ako makagalaw.

00:48:43.086 --> 00:48:46.965 align:center
Kaya itong prosesong 'to
at paggawa ng piyesang 'to,

00:48:47.049 --> 00:48:50.010 align:center
parang tadhana talaga
'yong gawin 'to ngayon

00:48:50.093 --> 00:48:54.473 align:center
kasi… parang ang layo-layo ko na
sa kung ano'ng alam ko dati.

00:48:54.556 --> 00:48:58.602 align:center
Tipong kung di ko gagawin 'to ngayon,

00:48:58.685 --> 00:49:00.979 align:center
pakiramdam ko, baka matuluyan na 'ko.

00:49:01.063 --> 00:49:01.980 align:center
-Oo.
-Alam mo 'yon?

00:49:04.024 --> 00:49:09.029 align:center
Kailangan kong makilala ulit ang sarili ko
sa lugar na parang tahanan sa akin.

00:49:09.112 --> 00:49:10.572 align:center
Tulad ng dati.

00:49:12.115 --> 00:49:16.244 align:center
Kung hindi, baka hindi na ako makabalik.

00:49:17.955 --> 00:49:20.832 align:center
Mahal ko 'tong mga 'to.

00:49:20.916 --> 00:49:21.875 align:center
Pamilya sila sa 'kin.

00:49:21.959 --> 00:49:26.004 align:center
May kung ano
sa kombinasyon ng naririnig si Kim

00:49:26.088 --> 00:49:28.632 align:center
at nakikita sila nang sabay.

00:49:28.715 --> 00:49:33.595 align:center
Maraming salamat sa lahat ng nandito.

00:49:33.679 --> 00:49:37.849 align:center
Ewan ko.
Parang nagtagpo ang buhay at sining

00:49:38.350 --> 00:49:42.312 align:center
sa napakagandang paraan
na ngayon ko pa lang nararanasan.

00:49:42.396 --> 00:49:46.316 align:center
Nakita ko na 'yon sa ibang tao,
pero di pa sa 'kin.

00:49:46.400 --> 00:49:47.859 align:center
Kaya, ang galing talaga.

00:49:48.652 --> 00:49:51.822 align:center
Okay, Jenn, patugtugin mo nga
dahil ikaw ang naglagay…

00:49:51.905 --> 00:49:55.075 align:center
Bale, 'yon na 'yon.

00:49:55.158 --> 00:49:57.411 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba sa 'kin?

00:50:00.414 --> 00:50:04.960 align:center
-Oo.
-Okay!

00:50:05.043 --> 00:50:07.129 align:center
-Exciting 'yon. Ulitin mo.
-Sige.

00:50:09.131 --> 00:50:12.092 align:center
Bale, 'yon na 'yon.

00:50:12.175 --> 00:50:13.760 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba sa 'kin?

00:50:13.844 --> 00:50:18.223 align:center
'Yon na siguro 'yong makakapagbukas do'n.

00:50:18.306 --> 00:50:19.933 align:center
-Oo.
-"Oo, meron."

00:50:20.017 --> 00:50:23.562 align:center
"At— At ito ang mga tanong ko." Literal.

00:50:24.354 --> 00:50:27.274 align:center
Ayos 'yan. Ulitin mo. Galing, Jenn.

00:50:27.357 --> 00:50:29.276 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba sa 'kin?

00:50:29.359 --> 00:50:31.528 align:center
Ang ganda. Ituloy mo lang.

00:50:48.420 --> 00:50:49.629 align:center
Tingnan mo 'to.

00:50:49.713 --> 00:50:52.007 align:center
Lahat ng buhok ko, napuputol.

00:50:54.217 --> 00:50:56.303 align:center
Sobrang daming buhok

00:50:57.262 --> 00:50:58.555 align:center
'yong nalalagas.

00:50:59.598 --> 00:51:00.599 align:center
Tingnan mo 'to.

00:51:01.308 --> 00:51:02.601 align:center
Puro putol.

00:51:03.560 --> 00:51:05.854 align:center
Tapos naglalagas 'yong buhok ko.

00:51:06.354 --> 00:51:08.315 align:center
Ano'ng nangyayari sa 'kin?

00:51:14.821 --> 00:51:17.449 align:center
Hanggang kailan ako ganito?

00:51:28.376 --> 00:51:29.795 align:center
Masama pakiramdam ko.

00:51:30.420 --> 00:51:31.922 align:center
Sama ng pakiramdam ko.

00:51:36.051 --> 00:51:37.719 align:center
Gusto mong kausapin si Alex?

00:51:38.220 --> 00:51:40.263 align:center
Madalas din siyang ganito.

00:51:50.524 --> 00:51:51.858 align:center
Alex.

00:51:51.942 --> 00:51:52.859 align:center
Ano 'yon?

00:51:53.485 --> 00:51:54.820 align:center
Tatawagan ko si Alex.

00:52:11.503 --> 00:52:12.379 align:center
Wala pa rin?

00:52:16.967 --> 00:52:18.969 align:center
Hinihintay kong tumawag si Alex.

00:52:20.053 --> 00:52:21.138 align:center
Okay.

00:52:27.185 --> 00:52:28.520 align:center
Uy. Si Alex 'to.

00:52:28.603 --> 00:52:29.479 align:center
-Uy, guys.
-Uy.

00:52:29.563 --> 00:52:32.190 align:center
-Saan kayo galing?
-Ano'ng nangyari?

00:52:33.608 --> 00:52:36.778 align:center
Nasa ospital ulit ako.

00:52:37.320 --> 00:52:38.697 align:center
Ano'ng nangyari?

00:52:38.780 --> 00:52:41.116 align:center
Kagaya no'ng dati.

00:52:41.199 --> 00:52:42.742 align:center
Hala. Bakit?

00:52:43.910 --> 00:52:50.625 align:center
May variant ako ng Guillain-Barré
na tinatawag na Miller Fisher syndrome.

00:52:51.167 --> 00:52:54.838 align:center
Tapos pabalik-balik lang siya
nang pabalik-balik.

00:52:54.921 --> 00:52:56.256 align:center
Paano nangyari 'to?

00:52:56.339 --> 00:52:58.508 align:center
Para sa akin,

00:52:58.592 --> 00:53:01.386 align:center
di talaga nila alam kung ano'ng sanhi nito

00:53:01.469 --> 00:53:04.723 align:center
maliban sa mental at physical stress.

00:53:05.473 --> 00:53:10.020 align:center
Pero bata pa lang ako, nangyayari na 'to.

00:53:10.103 --> 00:53:11.396 align:center
Ano'ng ibig mong sabihin?

00:53:12.105 --> 00:53:14.316 align:center
Di ko talaga maintindihan.

00:53:16.359 --> 00:53:19.154 align:center
Pero may mas malaking problema pa 'to.

00:53:19.237 --> 00:53:20.530 align:center
Gusto mong i-share?

00:53:23.825 --> 00:53:25.035 align:center
Naaapektuhan ako

00:53:25.118 --> 00:53:28.455 align:center
na di na ako— di makapag-function
ang katawan at isip ko.

00:53:28.538 --> 00:53:30.999 align:center
Pwede mo bang ipaliwanag pa?

00:53:31.082 --> 00:53:34.377 align:center
Alam ko naman noon pa
kung ano ang depression

00:53:34.461 --> 00:53:36.671 align:center
kasi palagi akong depressed.

00:53:37.631 --> 00:53:38.757 align:center
Hindi ko napansin.

00:53:38.840 --> 00:53:40.634 align:center
At alam ko ang salitang "anxiety,"

00:53:40.717 --> 00:53:43.428 align:center
pero di ko talaga alam
kung ano'ng ibig sabihin no'n.

00:53:43.511 --> 00:53:46.139 align:center
Noong nalaman ko kung ano 'yon,

00:53:46.223 --> 00:53:48.725 align:center
naisip ko, "Ay, do'n ako nagsisimula."

00:53:51.937 --> 00:53:55.357 align:center
Ang totoo, palaging gano'n para sa 'kin.

00:53:55.440 --> 00:53:58.401 align:center
Matagal na akong
may depression at anxiety,

00:53:58.902 --> 00:54:04.616 align:center
kaya di ko alam na meron ako no'n

00:54:04.699 --> 00:54:07.994 align:center
dahil akala ko,
gano'n lang talaga ang buhay.

00:54:09.496 --> 00:54:10.372 align:center
Pareho tayo.

00:54:11.665 --> 00:54:15.585 align:center
-Oo, ilang taon na akong umiinom ng gamot.
-Oo.

00:54:15.669 --> 00:54:17.837 align:center
Nababawasan 'yong lala,

00:54:17.921 --> 00:54:20.423 align:center
pero may matitinding anxiety pa rin.

00:54:20.507 --> 00:54:22.592 align:center
Minsan, nade-depress ka pa rin.

00:54:23.259 --> 00:54:25.220 align:center
Di ka talaga nagiging healthy.

00:54:25.303 --> 00:54:27.514 align:center
-Oo.
-Di ka makatodo ng exercise.

00:54:27.597 --> 00:54:28.640 align:center
Di ka na umiinom.

00:54:28.723 --> 00:54:32.269 align:center
Ano pa ba'ng dapat mong gawin?

00:54:32.352 --> 00:54:34.854 align:center
-Totoo.
-Tapos ganito pa rin ang nararamdaman mo.

00:54:36.481 --> 00:54:38.274 align:center
Well, kasi,

00:54:38.858 --> 00:54:42.612 align:center
parang kaya ko na 'tong
i-share sa inyo ngayon.

00:54:43.196 --> 00:54:45.281 align:center
Nalaman namin kamakailan na ako ay…

00:54:47.951 --> 00:54:49.035 align:center
bipolar.

00:54:49.703 --> 00:54:53.957 align:center
At… naaapektuhan ako nito

00:54:54.040 --> 00:54:56.835 align:center
sa napakaraming bagay,
kahit ayoko mang aminin.

00:54:56.918 --> 00:55:00.255 align:center
Nagwawala 'yong immune system ko,

00:55:00.338 --> 00:55:04.426 align:center
tapos bumibigay 'yong katawan ko.

00:55:04.509 --> 00:55:05.593 align:center
Ako din.

00:55:05.677 --> 00:55:07.012 align:center
Hungkag na 'ko.

00:55:07.762 --> 00:55:09.014 align:center
-Oo.
-Hungkag na.

00:55:10.015 --> 00:55:11.975 align:center
-Walang-wala na.
-Oo.

00:55:13.310 --> 00:55:16.646 align:center
Di natin tinatanggal
'yong mga episode na 'to.

00:55:16.730 --> 00:55:17.897 align:center
Tama.

00:55:17.981 --> 00:55:22.360 align:center
Tinatanggap mo sila
bilang bahagi ng buhay mo.

00:55:24.362 --> 00:55:27.532 align:center
-Di ba dapat inaalo kita?
-Naiintindihan kita.

00:55:27.615 --> 00:55:31.328 align:center
Pero 'yong kaalamang di ka mag-isa,
di mo kasalanan,

00:55:31.411 --> 00:55:36.124 align:center
minsan sapat na 'yon
para makausad 'yong isang tao.

00:55:36.207 --> 00:55:39.169 align:center
Salamat sa pakikinig.

00:55:39.252 --> 00:55:42.047 align:center
'Yong masabi 'yon ang—
'Yon ang pinakamahirap.

00:55:42.130 --> 00:55:44.090 align:center
Napadali mo naman.

00:55:44.924 --> 00:55:47.969 align:center
May mga bagay pa tayong dapat alamin.

00:55:50.138 --> 00:55:53.224 align:center
Nalulungkot ka ba
o nakahinga ka na nang maluwag?

00:55:54.017 --> 00:55:56.895 align:center
Hindi, parang nagbabago lang ako.

00:56:03.443 --> 00:56:07.906 align:center
Nagbabago ako, at nakakalungkot…

00:56:10.241 --> 00:56:11.326 align:center
pero okay din.

00:56:17.415 --> 00:56:19.709 align:center
Anong klaseng pagbabago
ang nararamdaman mo?

00:56:19.793 --> 00:56:24.339 align:center
Hindi, parang nile-let go ko lang
'yong idea ng kung ano—

00:56:24.422 --> 00:56:27.467 align:center
Kung ano 'yong akala ko sa sarili ko.

00:56:29.344 --> 00:56:33.556 align:center
Model student si Jennifer,
mahilig mag-aral at sumayaw.

00:56:33.640 --> 00:56:36.684 align:center
Pagtanda niya, gusto niyang
maging sikat na dancer.

00:56:36.768 --> 00:56:39.896 align:center
Pinasasalamatan niya ang pamilya niya
sa tulong nila sa pagsayaw niya.

00:56:39.979 --> 00:56:41.940 align:center
Mahal na mahal niya sila.

00:56:44.067 --> 00:56:46.986 align:center
Obsessed ako sa pagsasayaw.

00:56:48.029 --> 00:56:49.781 align:center
Noon pa man, hanggang ngayon.

00:56:51.324 --> 00:56:57.330 align:center
Gusto ko 'yong nawawala ako
sa hirap at sa pagsasayaw.

00:57:01.042 --> 00:57:04.546 align:center
Masasabi mo bang payapa ka
pag sumasayaw ka?

00:57:04.629 --> 00:57:05.755 align:center
Oo.

00:57:06.339 --> 00:57:09.676 align:center
Parang walang ibang nando'n,

00:57:09.759 --> 00:57:14.973 align:center
pero nalalagay din ako sa sitwasyong
di ko napapansin ang mga kailangan ko.

00:57:18.893 --> 00:57:20.895 align:center
Sa mundo ng sayaw,

00:57:20.979 --> 00:57:27.235 align:center
palagi kang napapalibutan ng mga taong
di binibigyang-halaga ang balance.

00:57:28.027 --> 00:57:30.989 align:center
Kasi culture lang 'yon ng…

00:57:32.824 --> 00:57:34.117 align:center
paglaban.

00:57:39.664 --> 00:57:43.960 align:center
Ang pattern mo, lumaban nang lumaban
hanggang bumagsak ka.

00:57:46.588 --> 00:57:49.799 align:center
Na-burnout talaga ako.

00:57:59.225 --> 00:58:00.810 align:center
No'ng pag-usapan natin 'yon,

00:58:00.894 --> 00:58:06.274 align:center
'yong switch para magawa 'to
para sa mga taong may ASD,

00:58:06.357 --> 00:58:08.776 align:center
abot 'yon hanggang dulo.

00:58:08.860 --> 00:58:11.237 align:center
Alam mo kung paano itulak ang sarili mo

00:58:11.321 --> 00:58:13.406 align:center
hanggang sa bumagsak ka sa sahig.

00:58:17.702 --> 00:58:24.709 align:center
Paano ko malalaman kung tapos na ako

00:58:26.377 --> 00:58:30.798 align:center
Kasi kapag tapos na ako

00:58:30.882 --> 00:58:36.888 align:center
Laging may dapat gawin
May dapat gawin

00:58:36.971 --> 00:58:42.227 align:center
May dapat gawin

00:58:42.310 --> 00:58:43.436 align:center
May dapat pang…

00:58:43.520 --> 00:58:44.896 align:center
Para 'kong nababaliw.

00:58:47.941 --> 00:58:50.235 align:center
Para akong baliw. Parang wala akong…

00:58:51.694 --> 00:58:52.946 align:center
alam.

00:58:56.824 --> 00:58:58.868 align:center
Natatakot ako,

00:59:00.161 --> 00:59:01.454 align:center
saka…

00:59:04.457 --> 00:59:05.959 align:center
Di ko alam na…

00:59:08.461 --> 00:59:10.129 align:center
magiging ganito kahirap…

00:59:15.009 --> 00:59:16.886 align:center
na malaman lahat ng 'to sa sarili ko.

00:59:16.970 --> 00:59:23.935 align:center
Wala nang oras pang maghintay

00:59:24.018 --> 00:59:25.937 align:center
O mag-isip

00:59:26.813 --> 00:59:30.817 align:center
Paano ko malalaman kung paano?

00:59:30.900 --> 00:59:33.736 align:center
May pagbabago kapag nagawa mong tanggapin

00:59:34.988 --> 00:59:39.200 align:center
at kilalanin 'yong mga matagal mo nang
nararamdaman.

00:59:39.284 --> 00:59:42.578 align:center
Mas nagiging… totoo.

00:59:43.538 --> 00:59:44.998 align:center
Lakad

00:59:47.417 --> 00:59:50.086 align:center
Lakad

00:59:52.255 --> 00:59:54.424 align:center
Mahirap kasi pagod na pagod ka, at…

00:59:54.507 --> 00:59:56.509 align:center
Pag pinag-uusapan
'yong bigay-todo mindset,

00:59:56.593 --> 00:59:58.094 align:center
bigay-todo ka din sa pagkilos.

00:59:58.177 --> 01:00:00.805 align:center
Lakad

01:00:00.888 --> 01:00:02.890 align:center
May tendency ka ring gumawa ng extreme.

01:00:02.974 --> 01:00:06.769 align:center
Kaya halos sinasagad mo
ang sarili mo hanggang mapagod,

01:00:06.853 --> 01:00:10.273 align:center
at sinasabi ng katawan mo,
"Teka, hinto muna tayo."

01:00:12.817 --> 01:00:16.279 align:center
Magpatuloy ka lang, lakad lang

01:00:18.573 --> 01:00:19.866 align:center
Oo. Kumusta ang balakang mo?

01:00:20.783 --> 01:00:22.243 align:center
Sobrang sakit.

01:00:22.327 --> 01:00:26.623 align:center
Ginagawa ko lahat ng dapat kong gawin,
pero walang nakakatulong.

01:00:26.706 --> 01:00:28.666 align:center
Kaya medyo nakakatakot na.

01:00:28.750 --> 01:00:30.251 align:center
Lakad

01:00:33.963 --> 01:00:35.506 align:center
May nakakapagpawala ba ng sakit?

01:00:35.590 --> 01:00:39.427 align:center
Ang totoo, teenager pa lang ako,
may chronic pain na ako.

01:00:41.054 --> 01:00:42.055 align:center
Diyan.

01:00:42.138 --> 01:00:45.266 align:center
Kumilos ka pa, lakad

01:00:45.350 --> 01:00:48.269 align:center
Nakapagpatingin ka na ba
sa doktor na nagpa-blood work sa 'yo

01:00:48.353 --> 01:00:51.272 align:center
para makita kung may autoimmune ka?

01:00:51.356 --> 01:00:52.940 align:center
Alam kong napag-usapan natin 'to,

01:00:53.024 --> 01:00:57.070 align:center
pero mas mataas ang correlation
ng autoimmune at ASD.

01:00:57.570 --> 01:00:59.447 align:center
Lakad

01:01:00.531 --> 01:01:03.785 align:center
'Yong mga palatandaan ko para sa lupus…

01:01:03.868 --> 01:01:05.536 align:center
Lakad

01:01:05.620 --> 01:01:06.454 align:center
…matataas.

01:01:08.539 --> 01:01:11.292 align:center
Lakad…

01:01:11.376 --> 01:01:14.337 align:center
Iba 'yong sitwasyon mo
kompara sa ibang dancers.

01:01:14.420 --> 01:01:17.256 align:center
May underlying diagnosis ka pa,
autoimmune issue.

01:01:17.340 --> 01:01:20.343 align:center
Alam kong nakakapagsimula
ng reaction ang stress.

01:01:20.426 --> 01:01:22.136 align:center
Wag mo munang isipin 'yong pera.

01:01:22.220 --> 01:01:25.515 align:center
-Ayoko nang mag-self-produce ulit ng show.
-Di na.

01:01:25.598 --> 01:01:28.434 align:center
Lalo kung performer ako do'n.

01:01:28.518 --> 01:01:32.522 align:center
'Yong pinakamalaking grant
na in-apply-an namin, di namin nakuha.

01:01:32.605 --> 01:01:34.482 align:center
Finalists kami, kaunti na lang,

01:01:34.565 --> 01:01:36.067 align:center
pero nakakainis talaga

01:01:36.150 --> 01:01:39.737 align:center
kasi parang nag-uumpisa ulit kami
sa fundraising ngayon.

01:01:40.238 --> 01:01:43.825 align:center
Tinuruan kang tiisin ang sakit.

01:01:43.908 --> 01:01:46.285 align:center
Tinuruan kang tiisin ang hirap.

01:01:46.369 --> 01:01:48.413 align:center
Ano'ng dapat kong gawin?

01:01:48.496 --> 01:01:50.331 align:center
Doon ako na-o-overwhelm.

01:01:51.124 --> 01:01:52.417 align:center
Higit pa

01:01:52.500 --> 01:01:54.585 align:center
Gusto kong mag-focus sa isa lang.

01:01:57.922 --> 01:02:00.842 align:center
Basta hindi show ko,
gaya ng pagtuturo o pagko-choreo,

01:02:00.925 --> 01:02:02.760 align:center
hindi lang 'yon sideline.

01:02:03.928 --> 01:02:05.596 align:center
Ibinibigay ko lahat do'n.

01:02:06.764 --> 01:02:09.559 align:center
Pero ito lang ang kailangan ko.

01:02:09.642 --> 01:02:13.771 align:center
Wala nang oras para maghintay

01:02:13.855 --> 01:02:16.774 align:center
Wala nang oras para mag-isip

01:02:16.858 --> 01:02:19.902 align:center
Walang oras para makaramdam

01:02:19.986 --> 01:02:22.739 align:center
Kailangan ko bang kumilos pa?

01:02:22.822 --> 01:02:25.116 align:center
Kikilos pa

01:02:25.199 --> 01:02:27.743 align:center
Kikilos pa

01:02:27.827 --> 01:02:34.834 align:center
Kilos pa

01:02:38.671 --> 01:02:43.926 align:center
At nakakapagod na pagdaanan 'yon,
pati 'yong paglantad sa sarili mo.

01:02:44.010 --> 01:02:45.761 align:center
Kaya nga, gaya ng sabi mo,

01:02:45.845 --> 01:02:49.015 align:center
"Marami na akong pinagdaanan,
gusto ko lang wag kumilos."

01:03:04.322 --> 01:03:07.074 align:center
Sinusubukan ko lang
na magpakita araw-araw.

01:03:08.034 --> 01:03:10.161 align:center
Alam ko man o hindi ang ginagawa ko.

01:03:15.291 --> 01:03:19.212 align:center
Lakad

01:03:20.505 --> 01:03:25.009 align:center
Ano pa ba'ng dapat kong gawin?

01:03:27.803 --> 01:03:31.641 align:center
Kikilos pa ba?

01:03:32.600 --> 01:03:39.440 align:center
Kikilos pa?

01:03:39.524 --> 01:03:40.983 align:center
Kikilos pa?

01:03:41.067 --> 01:03:43.569 align:center
Napapagod ka ba sa gastos natin?

01:03:43.653 --> 01:03:47.865 align:center
Oo, gusto ko lang mawala 'yong hirap
ng pagsuporta sa lifestyle natin.

01:03:48.658 --> 01:03:50.618 align:center
Pwede rin nating ikansela 'yong show mo

01:03:50.701 --> 01:03:53.788 align:center
kasi 'yong dahilan mo sa paggawa ng show,
hindi dapat iba,

01:03:53.871 --> 01:03:56.123 align:center
'yong mundo, si Sonya o Alex o—

01:03:56.207 --> 01:03:59.460 align:center
Hindi. Gusto kong gawin 'tong show.

01:04:00.962 --> 01:04:04.340 align:center
Pero 'yon lang ang gusto kong gawin.
Ayoko na ng iba.

01:04:04.841 --> 01:04:05.883 align:center
'Yon ang gawin natin.

01:04:05.967 --> 01:04:11.889 align:center
Kikilos pa ba?

01:04:11.973 --> 01:04:14.308 align:center
Kikilos pa…

01:04:14.392 --> 01:04:18.437 align:center
Sandal ka sa 'kin.
Wala kang pinapasa sa 'kin. Kapatid kita.

01:04:18.521 --> 01:04:22.024 align:center
-Paano mo magagawa 'yon?
-Ikaw— Obsessed ako.

01:04:22.108 --> 01:04:23.442 align:center
Obsessed ako sa sayaw.

01:04:23.526 --> 01:04:24.694 align:center
Sa mga ideya.

01:04:24.777 --> 01:04:27.697 align:center
Sa pagpapabuti ng nararamdaman
ng soul sister ko.

01:04:28.364 --> 01:04:32.034 align:center
Bagsakan mo 'ko. Kaya ko 'yan.

01:04:32.118 --> 01:04:35.955 align:center
Nandito lang ako para mag-share.

01:04:36.038 --> 01:04:37.498 align:center
Munting epekto kumbaga.

01:04:37.582 --> 01:04:41.836 align:center
Ang pinakamahalaga, makita ito
ng mga taong kailangang makita ang piyesa.

01:04:41.919 --> 01:04:43.671 align:center
Maraming tao 'yon.

01:04:43.754 --> 01:04:45.172 align:center
Hahanap tayo ng paraan.

01:04:45.256 --> 01:04:47.675 align:center
Alam kong matutuloy ang show.

01:04:48.301 --> 01:04:50.219 align:center
Alam ko 'yan sa kaluluwa ko.

01:04:50.303 --> 01:04:54.140 align:center
Di ko alam kung saan o kailan.
At di ko alam kung paano.

01:04:56.142 --> 01:05:01.522 align:center
Maraming bahagi ang career na 'to
na di healthy para sa 'kin.

01:05:02.440 --> 01:05:07.486 align:center
Oo, maganda nga,
pero di ko 'to marerekomenda sa lahat.

01:05:08.446 --> 01:05:10.906 align:center
Special interest ko lang 'to,

01:05:10.990 --> 01:05:14.327 align:center
at nakatulong sa 'kin ang pagsasayaw.

01:05:15.328 --> 01:05:18.289 align:center
Ano'ng kinatatakutan mo

01:05:18.372 --> 01:05:20.750 align:center
kapag iniisip mong aalis ka sa city?

01:05:21.459 --> 01:05:23.252 align:center
Ngayong alam mo nang tuloy na.

01:05:23.336 --> 01:05:25.504 align:center
Maraming sabay-sabay na pagbabago.

01:05:25.588 --> 01:05:29.634 align:center
At saka di ko…
di ko alam kung ano'ng mangyayari.

01:05:29.717 --> 01:05:31.260 align:center
Ibebenta 'yong dream home namin

01:05:31.844 --> 01:05:35.765 align:center
ngayong hindi na namin kayang tustusan.

01:05:35.848 --> 01:05:38.809 align:center
Di na kaya,
dahil sa art na gusto kong gawin.

01:05:38.893 --> 01:05:42.647 align:center
Oo, nagdesisyon akong
i-cancel lahat ngayong fall.

01:05:42.730 --> 01:05:45.399 align:center
Di ko alam ang mangyayari.
Di ko pa nagagawa 'to.

01:05:45.483 --> 01:05:48.569 align:center
Tinanggihan ko 'yong $50,000 na trabaho.

01:05:48.653 --> 01:05:50.696 align:center
Five ang sabi mo, di ba? Hindi 50?

01:05:51.197 --> 01:05:56.202 align:center
Trabahong nagkakahalaga ng $50,000

01:05:56.285 --> 01:05:58.537 align:center
Ang saya. Oo.

01:05:59.830 --> 01:06:02.124 align:center
Okay, eto na. Cheers.

01:06:02.208 --> 01:06:04.710 align:center
Cheers, di ko na afford magpantalon.

01:06:06.837 --> 01:06:11.092 align:center
Oo, di ko alam kung ano'ng susunod
pagkatapos ng palabas na 'to.

01:06:11.175 --> 01:06:15.805 align:center
Parang kailangan mong umatras
para makausad.

01:06:15.888 --> 01:06:17.390 align:center
Parang tayo, babe.

01:06:17.473 --> 01:06:19.684 align:center
-'Yong dalawang daga?
-Oo, sa Jersey.

01:06:19.767 --> 01:06:22.478 align:center
-Dalawang dagang papunta sa Jersey.
-Ikaw 'yong mas mataba.

01:06:22.561 --> 01:06:23.729 align:center
Ako 'yong mataba—?

01:06:25.940 --> 01:06:28.984 align:center
Di na tayo walking distance
sa view na 'to.

01:06:29.068 --> 01:06:30.027 align:center
Hindi na.

01:06:30.111 --> 01:06:32.113 align:center
Pero kahit pumalpak tayo,

01:06:32.196 --> 01:06:35.866 align:center
mas okay pa rin 'yon
kaysa manatili rito at manood ng mga pato.

01:06:36.367 --> 01:06:37.660 align:center
Nakapila sila.

01:06:37.743 --> 01:06:40.371 align:center
Sabi nila, "Hahanay ang mga pato."

01:06:40.454 --> 01:06:42.957 align:center
-Ganito ang pakiramdam ng balance.
-Oo.

01:06:43.040 --> 01:06:44.166 align:center
Baka sa trabaho mo,

01:06:44.250 --> 01:06:47.545 align:center
mabigyan mo ng bagong kahulugan 'yon
sa mundo ng pagsasayaw.

01:06:51.298 --> 01:06:55.261 align:center
Mahalaga ang pag-push bilang atleta,
pero mahalaga rin ang pahinga.

01:06:55.344 --> 01:06:57.471 align:center
Mahalaga ang nutrisyon, ang balance.

01:06:57.555 --> 01:07:01.267 align:center
'Yong isip mo, kalusugan mo,
emosyon mo, parte lahat 'yon no'n.

01:07:01.350 --> 01:07:03.936 align:center
At naiisip ko na kapag balanse lahat 'yon,

01:07:04.020 --> 01:07:06.605 align:center
magkakaroon ka
ng napakagandang performance.

01:07:06.689 --> 01:07:10.776 align:center
Oo, 'yon ang gusto kong hanapin,
'yong gano'n.

01:07:10.860 --> 01:07:12.278 align:center
Salamat, Jennifer.

01:07:12.361 --> 01:07:14.321 align:center
Oo, gusto ko 'yon.

01:07:14.405 --> 01:07:17.533 align:center
Oo, kasi di mo pa alam,
pero hinahanap mo na.

01:07:19.035 --> 01:07:23.539 align:center
Ang pinakamagandang klase ng sining,
'yong di mo alam na ginagawa mo na pala.

01:07:23.622 --> 01:07:26.000 align:center
Basta nando'n ka lang.

01:07:26.792 --> 01:07:30.546 align:center
Katulad ni Jenn,
nakikita ko na ang mundo sa bagong paraan,

01:07:30.629 --> 01:07:34.258 align:center
at nauunawaan ko na
kung ano ang nag-connect sa 'kin kay Jenn,

01:07:34.341 --> 01:07:38.012 align:center
kung ano'ng nag-connect sa kanya sa 'kin,
at kung bakit ang bilis naming…

01:07:38.929 --> 01:07:40.973 align:center
Sinusubukan kong intindihin
'yong katatagan

01:07:41.057 --> 01:07:44.101 align:center
habang lumalaki bilang punkista
at malungkuting bata no'ng '90s

01:07:44.185 --> 01:07:45.603 align:center
na maagang natutong uminom,

01:07:45.686 --> 01:07:49.482 align:center
kung saan nilulunok mo lang lahat
at nagpapakatatag lang.

01:07:49.565 --> 01:07:54.403 align:center
Kailangan kong kalimutan
'yong dating Ian, at napakahirap no'n,

01:07:54.487 --> 01:07:57.948 align:center
lalo na't sabay kaming
gumagawa no'n ngayon.

01:08:00.993 --> 01:08:02.495 align:center
Sobrang sakit ng ulo ko.

01:08:02.578 --> 01:08:03.662 align:center
Nasaan ang susi?

01:08:04.246 --> 01:08:05.873 align:center
Nasa akin ba 'yong susi?

01:08:08.000 --> 01:08:09.001 align:center
Babalik ako.

01:08:09.835 --> 01:08:11.504 align:center
Mukhang stressed siya.

01:08:13.714 --> 01:08:16.300 align:center
-May pinagdaraanan siya ngayon.
-Okay.

01:08:33.526 --> 01:08:38.197 align:center
Huling ligo ko na 'to
sa apartment namin sa New York City,

01:08:38.280 --> 01:08:40.658 align:center
pero okay lang naman.

01:08:40.741 --> 01:08:43.077 align:center
Lilipat muna kami sa Jersey.

01:08:43.160 --> 01:08:44.995 align:center
Ewan ko kung hanggang kailan.

01:08:47.623 --> 01:08:48.624 align:center
Pero bago ang lahat…

01:08:50.835 --> 01:08:57.758 align:center
Iuwi mo ako

01:09:03.097 --> 01:09:06.725 align:center
Iuwi mo…

01:09:06.809 --> 01:09:09.436 align:center
Tuloy-tuloy na kakulangan
sa social communication

01:09:09.520 --> 01:09:12.731 align:center
at social interaction
sa maraming konteksto.

01:09:12.815 --> 01:09:19.446 align:center
Iuwi mo ako

01:09:21.073 --> 01:09:27.496 align:center
Iuwi

01:09:30.791 --> 01:09:33.419 align:center
Ang gandang lugar no'n para sa paglaki,

01:09:33.502 --> 01:09:38.382 align:center
dama mong ligtas at nasa 'yong tahanan ka.

01:09:38.465 --> 01:09:41.302 align:center
Nakaka-relax talaga
'yong nasa kalikasan ka.

01:09:41.886 --> 01:09:42.887 align:center
Jenn!

01:09:42.970 --> 01:09:44.555 align:center
Buwisit!

01:09:44.638 --> 01:09:47.391 align:center
Isang environment
na di ka gaanong pinipilit

01:09:47.474 --> 01:09:51.395 align:center
mag-react o magkontrol ng nararamdaman.

01:09:54.440 --> 01:09:57.026 align:center
Habang nabibigyang-linaw na ang lahat,

01:09:57.693 --> 01:10:00.613 align:center
parang nagiging teenager din ako.

01:10:01.405 --> 01:10:05.451 align:center
Parang nararanasan ko ulit
ang lahat sa unang pagkakataon.

01:10:07.995 --> 01:10:11.415 align:center
Gusto kong malaman
kung saan ito nanggaling.

01:10:14.376 --> 01:10:19.048 align:center
Nakakalito lang kasi
sobrang daming pagmamahal doon,

01:10:19.131 --> 01:10:22.259 align:center
pero walang tsansa
ng matagumpay na komunikasyon.

01:10:22.343 --> 01:10:23.677 align:center
'Yon ang pakiramdam.

01:10:24.929 --> 01:10:31.101 align:center
Pero may malalim akong nararamdaman
na parang kailangan kong umalis.

01:10:31.185 --> 01:10:32.228 align:center
Oo.

01:10:33.062 --> 01:10:34.980 align:center
Parang wala lang no'ng umalis ako sa 'min.

01:10:37.358 --> 01:10:39.985 align:center
MGA GAMIT NI JENN

01:10:40.486 --> 01:10:45.532 align:center
Kakulangan sa non-verbal na pagkilos
na gamit sa social interaction.

01:10:46.951 --> 01:10:51.372 align:center
Magkaiba ang nagmamahal
at nangangailangan.

01:10:52.456 --> 01:10:55.125 align:center
Hindi mo naman talaga ako kailangan.

01:10:55.626 --> 01:10:57.002 align:center
Mama.

01:10:57.753 --> 01:10:59.421 align:center
Hindi 'yan totoo.

01:11:00.965 --> 01:11:04.802 align:center
Jennifer… puwede mo bang sabihin,
"Happy Mother's Day"?

01:11:05.469 --> 01:11:07.721 align:center
Mother's Day.

01:11:07.805 --> 01:11:08.973 align:center
Oo.

01:11:09.056 --> 01:11:11.517 align:center
Madalas akong tawaging makasarili dati.

01:11:11.600 --> 01:11:12.559 align:center
Bitawan mo!

01:11:12.643 --> 01:11:15.020 align:center
Bakit mo ako itinutulak palayo?

01:11:16.021 --> 01:11:17.648 align:center
Mas palaban.

01:11:19.316 --> 01:11:22.194 align:center
Wala raw akong pakialam sa pamilya ko.

01:11:23.279 --> 01:11:24.530 align:center
Kaya naniwala na ako.

01:11:25.489 --> 01:11:26.740 align:center
Kapag na-diagnose ka,

01:11:26.824 --> 01:11:30.661 align:center
at may impormasyon kang
genetic 'yon o namamana,

01:11:30.744 --> 01:11:32.579 align:center
titingnan mo 'yong pamilya mo.

01:11:32.663 --> 01:11:36.875 align:center
-Ang dami mong sinabi sa… utak ko.
-Sorry.

01:11:38.335 --> 01:11:40.212 align:center
Di ko siya makontrol.

01:11:40.295 --> 01:11:42.715 align:center
'Yong pagpapalaki sa 'kin,
pag sinabi ni Mama, "boo,"

01:11:42.798 --> 01:11:44.216 align:center
tatalon ka.

01:11:44.300 --> 01:11:46.385 align:center
Di 'yon nangyari sa 'kin.

01:11:47.803 --> 01:11:50.639 align:center
Parang nag-ugat lahat sa komunikasyon.

01:11:50.723 --> 01:11:53.183 align:center
-Oo.
-'Yon ang naramdaman ko sa nanay ko.

01:11:53.767 --> 01:11:56.770 align:center
Hindi ako makapag-communicate
sa taong 'to.

01:11:56.854 --> 01:11:59.273 align:center
Nakakabaliw.

01:11:59.356 --> 01:12:02.526 align:center
Pag tinatanong mo,
"Bakit kailangan mong malaman?"

01:12:02.609 --> 01:12:05.029 align:center
at "Ano'ng silbi ng diagnosis?"

01:12:05.112 --> 01:12:08.407 align:center
at "Ano'ng magbabago?"
at "Sino'ng may pakialam?"

01:12:08.490 --> 01:12:10.534 align:center
Di ko maintindihan ang mundo mo,

01:12:10.617 --> 01:12:12.703 align:center
kasi di mo 'yon ibinahagi sa 'kin.

01:12:12.786 --> 01:12:16.832 align:center
Hindi kita mapapasok sa mundo ko
kasi merong napakalaking kulang.

01:12:16.915 --> 01:12:20.419 align:center
Kakulangan sa
social-emotional reciprocity.

01:12:21.587 --> 01:12:23.756 align:center
Bakit mo hinahalungkat 'yan?

01:12:23.839 --> 01:12:26.175 align:center
Naghahanap ako ng pera para sa show ko.

01:12:27.009 --> 01:12:30.429 align:center
-Ibebenta mo 'yong dolls?
-Tinitingnan ko kung magkano.

01:12:32.014 --> 01:12:36.268 align:center
Bawat isa nito, kumakatawan
sa napakaraming pagsisikap.

01:12:36.352 --> 01:12:39.563 align:center
Buti at natutuhan kong sumayaw
dahil laki ako sa maliit na bayan.

01:12:39.646 --> 01:12:42.316 align:center
Walang gaanong oportunidad,
at hindi umaalis ang mga tao.

01:12:42.399 --> 01:12:44.318 align:center
Sabi nga ng nanay mo, kung di ka sumayaw,

01:12:44.401 --> 01:12:45.736 align:center
napariwara ka na.

01:12:45.819 --> 01:12:47.571 align:center
-Oo.
-Pariwarang-pariwara.

01:12:48.697 --> 01:12:50.574 align:center
Sa Idaho, posible 'yon.

01:12:51.075 --> 01:12:52.910 align:center
May mga tao roon

01:12:52.993 --> 01:12:55.871 align:center
na walang access sa mental health care.

01:12:55.954 --> 01:12:57.414 align:center
O di ito napag-uusapan.

01:12:57.498 --> 01:12:59.249 align:center
Di komportableng lugar 'yon…

01:12:59.333 --> 01:13:00.501 align:center
Eto na 'ko!

01:13:00.584 --> 01:13:02.878 align:center
…para sa kahit anong naiiba.

01:13:02.961 --> 01:13:05.923 align:center
Hindi bagay si Jenn sa bayan na 'yon.

01:13:06.548 --> 01:13:08.175 align:center
Napakaliit na bayan no'n.

01:13:08.258 --> 01:13:11.720 align:center
Ang populasyon do'n no'ng bata ako,
parang nasa 700.

01:13:11.804 --> 01:13:14.181 align:center
-Ano'ng pangalan ng bayan n'yo?
-Star.

01:13:14.264 --> 01:13:18.060 align:center
Diyos ko. Ito 'yong birth book
na may dalawang pahinang puno.

01:13:18.143 --> 01:13:19.144 align:center
"Notes sa ugali."

01:13:19.228 --> 01:13:22.648 align:center
"Eight months old. Gusto mong makipaglaro
sa matatanda, di sa kaedad mo."

01:13:23.315 --> 01:13:26.360 align:center
"Sa edad na 'to,
napaka-independent at argumentative mo."

01:13:26.443 --> 01:13:29.488 align:center
"Minsan, iniisip ko
kung kakayanin ko ba 'yong isang araw."

01:13:31.782 --> 01:13:33.325 align:center
"Napakatalino mo."

01:13:33.409 --> 01:13:35.285 align:center
"Nagsi-spell ng pangalan, nagbibilang."

01:13:35.369 --> 01:13:38.080 align:center
"May vocabulary ka
na nakakamangha minsan."

01:13:38.163 --> 01:13:40.124 align:center
"Mahilig sumigaw."

01:13:40.207 --> 01:13:41.500 align:center
Nandiyan ba 'yon?

01:13:41.583 --> 01:13:43.752 align:center
-Bitawan mo!
-Sige, tanggalin mo.

01:13:43.836 --> 01:13:45.379 align:center
-Bitawan mo!
-Nakuha mo na.

01:13:45.462 --> 01:13:46.463 align:center
Hindi mo…

01:13:47.965 --> 01:13:49.174 align:center
"Pero ang pinakamahalaga,

01:13:49.258 --> 01:13:51.677 align:center
mahal ka namin
nang higit pa sa inaasahan namin."

01:13:51.760 --> 01:13:54.388 align:center
"Napakabait mo.
Di kita ipagpapalit sa kahit ano."

01:13:54.471 --> 01:13:56.932 align:center
"Napaka-mature mong bata."

01:13:58.100 --> 01:14:00.102 align:center
"February 21, 1991."

01:14:03.397 --> 01:14:07.526 align:center
Pagkukulang sa pagbuo,
pagpapanatili, at pag-unawa sa relasyon.

01:14:09.069 --> 01:14:11.738 align:center
May part daw
sa pagkakaro'n ng autism ang namamana.

01:14:12.656 --> 01:14:14.366 align:center
May diperensiya 'to.

01:14:14.450 --> 01:14:18.495 align:center
Siyempre, parang salamin
ang mga kapatid at pamilya mo.

01:14:19.371 --> 01:14:21.874 align:center
-Bagay na bagay, 'no?
-Pamilya tayo.

01:14:23.333 --> 01:14:28.255 align:center
Lahat ng mga totoong rebelasyon na 'to,
nangyayari nang sabay

01:14:28.338 --> 01:14:31.800 align:center
sa pagbuo ng show.

01:14:32.384 --> 01:14:34.469 align:center
Itaas mo para makita nila.

01:14:34.553 --> 01:14:37.639 align:center
At 'yong mga natutuklasan ko sa buhay ko,

01:14:37.723 --> 01:14:43.770 align:center
napupunta sa harap ko sa stage
sa napakaganda at organic na paraan.

01:14:54.823 --> 01:14:57.784 align:center
Bear? Nasa'n 'yong bear?

01:14:57.868 --> 01:15:02.080 align:center
Nasa'n 'yong bear?

01:15:02.164 --> 01:15:04.291 align:center
Nasa'n 'yong bear?

01:15:04.374 --> 01:15:05.667 align:center
Nasa 'yo yata.

01:15:05.751 --> 01:15:09.880 align:center
Nasa'n 'yong bear?

01:15:10.923 --> 01:15:15.219 align:center
Nasa'n 'yong bear?

01:15:15.969 --> 01:15:19.389 align:center
-Ang cute. Di niya ako nakita.
-Nakakagapang siya, di ba?

01:15:22.309 --> 01:15:24.603 align:center
Sa perpektong mundo,

01:15:24.686 --> 01:15:27.648 align:center
kaya ko 'yong sobrang dami.

01:15:27.731 --> 01:15:28.607 align:center
Oo.

01:15:29.441 --> 01:15:33.612 align:center
Gabundok 'yong tela sa paa ko pagtapos ko.

01:15:34.238 --> 01:15:35.197 align:center
Oo.

01:15:37.199 --> 01:15:39.368 align:center
Pwede ka bang magkomento
tungkol sa piyesa?

01:15:39.451 --> 01:15:41.203 align:center
-Ano'ng ibig sabihin nito sa 'yo?
-Oo.

01:15:44.498 --> 01:15:46.375 align:center
'Yan 'yong bahay ng nanay ni Robbyn.

01:15:46.458 --> 01:15:48.043 align:center
Hi, Lola!

01:15:49.294 --> 01:15:51.338 align:center
Sa bahay ng lola ko,

01:15:52.464 --> 01:15:54.925 align:center
marami akong alaala ng paglalaro

01:15:55.008 --> 01:15:57.135 align:center
at pakiramdam na malaya.

01:15:59.179 --> 01:16:00.597 align:center
Bulaga!

01:16:00.681 --> 01:16:03.475 align:center
May likas siyang paraan na malaman

01:16:03.559 --> 01:16:08.522 align:center
kung paano ako hayaan
na ulit-ulitin ang mga bagay-bagay.

01:16:08.605 --> 01:16:11.525 align:center
Lagi akong malaya
dahil di niya ako pinipigilan.

01:16:11.608 --> 01:16:14.152 align:center
Paulit-ulit kong pinapatugtog
'yong isang kanta,

01:16:14.236 --> 01:16:16.405 align:center
at di niya sasabihing, "Patayin na 'yan."

01:16:21.076 --> 01:16:24.413 align:center
'Yong mga tissue, no'ng bata kasi ako,
di ako marunong lumundag.

01:16:24.496 --> 01:16:27.165 align:center
Sabi ni Kim, karaniwan 'yon
sa batang may autism,

01:16:27.249 --> 01:16:29.209 align:center
'yong hirap lumundag.

01:16:29.293 --> 01:16:33.422 align:center
Kaya tinuruan ako ng lola ko
kung paano lumundag gamit 'yong tissue.

01:16:33.922 --> 01:16:36.091 align:center
"Pag humakbang ka, kumuha ka ng tissue,

01:16:36.174 --> 01:16:38.093 align:center
at pag lumukso ka, itapon mo."

01:16:38.176 --> 01:16:39.553 align:center
Kaya natuto ako.

01:16:39.636 --> 01:16:46.059 align:center
At naaalala ko,
napuno ng tissue 'yong sala.

01:16:46.560 --> 01:16:51.106 align:center
Di niya ako pinipilit maglinis
o pinapagalitan sa kalat na ginawa ko.

01:16:51.189 --> 01:16:53.066 align:center
Pero do'n ako natutong lumundag.

01:16:53.567 --> 01:16:56.194 align:center
Do'n galing 'yong ideya ng tissue.

01:16:56.695 --> 01:17:00.073 align:center
Tinuruan ka niyang gumalaw nang may ritmo.

01:17:00.157 --> 01:17:03.035 align:center
Madalas, di-coordinated ang kilos
ng mga may ASD.

01:17:03.118 --> 01:17:06.455 align:center
Kaya hindi laging may ritmo
'yong paggalaw nila.

01:17:06.538 --> 01:17:08.999 align:center
Kaya mahirap sa 'yo ang paglundag.

01:17:09.082 --> 01:17:11.543 align:center
Tinuruan ka ng lola mo visually

01:17:11.626 --> 01:17:13.879 align:center
gamit 'yong mga tissue,

01:17:13.962 --> 01:17:16.465 align:center
at napakita 'to sa 'yo
sa pamamagitan ng paghakbang

01:17:16.548 --> 01:17:20.302 align:center
habang pinupulot ang tissue
at lumulukso habang tinatapon 'yon.

01:17:20.385 --> 01:17:22.596 align:center
Nang gawin niya 'yon, nakuha mo na.

01:17:22.679 --> 01:17:26.141 align:center
At ganoon mo talaga maaabot
ang mga may ASD,

01:17:26.224 --> 01:17:28.560 align:center
susundan mo ang proseso nila.

01:17:29.853 --> 01:17:31.855 align:center
Napakaganda ng regalo niya sa 'yo.

01:17:39.988 --> 01:17:43.950 align:center
Natutuhan ni Jennifer
na maging independent sa murang edad.

01:17:44.034 --> 01:17:46.036 align:center
Natuto lang ako no'ng wala na si Mama.

01:17:46.953 --> 01:17:48.497 align:center
Talagang sumandal ka sa kanya.

01:17:49.539 --> 01:17:50.582 align:center
Oo.

01:17:52.250 --> 01:17:54.294 align:center
At gusto ko 'yon para sa 'yo.

01:18:01.343 --> 01:18:03.387 align:center
Hindi kita kinasuklaman.

01:18:07.265 --> 01:18:09.559 align:center
Gusto ko ang lahat sa 'yo.

01:18:14.648 --> 01:18:17.359 align:center
Kailangan ko lang ng tulong minsan.

01:18:25.200 --> 01:18:27.119 align:center
Napakaganda ng regalo niya sa 'yo.

01:18:34.167 --> 01:18:35.127 align:center
Oo.

01:18:58.692 --> 01:19:00.402 align:center
-Hello?
-Hi.

01:19:00.485 --> 01:19:01.862 align:center
-Hi.
-Deretsahin mo na.

01:19:02.779 --> 01:19:07.117 align:center
Iko-commission ng Perelman
'yong show natin.

01:19:07.200 --> 01:19:09.286 align:center
-'Tang ina?
-'Tang ina?

01:19:09.369 --> 01:19:12.164 align:center
Kasama tayo sa inaugural season.

01:19:14.875 --> 01:19:20.464 align:center
May natanggap na email si Sonya
mula kay Bill, 'yong artistic director.

01:19:20.547 --> 01:19:24.801 align:center
Sabi niya, "Pasensiya na
sa late na sagot. Sobrang busy lang."

01:19:24.885 --> 01:19:28.847 align:center
"Gusto naming i-commission ito
at tulungan kayong matuloy ito."

01:19:28.930 --> 01:19:32.434 align:center
"Salamat, Sonya, sa pagdala
ng magandang project na ito sa amin."

01:19:32.517 --> 01:19:34.186 align:center
Hindi ito normal.

01:19:35.020 --> 01:19:36.980 align:center
-Ano—
-'Yon dapat ang title ng dokyu.

01:19:37.063 --> 01:19:39.691 align:center
-"Hindi Ito Normal."
-'Yon dapat ang title.

01:19:42.235 --> 01:19:43.904 align:center
Grabe 'to,

01:19:43.987 --> 01:19:49.075 align:center
higit pa 'to sa kahit anong
pinangarap ko, seryoso.

01:19:49.576 --> 01:19:51.077 align:center
-Oo. Ang galing.
-Oo.

01:19:51.161 --> 01:19:53.789 align:center
Di ko alam na posible pala 'to.

01:19:53.872 --> 01:19:55.499 align:center
Ang tindi.

01:19:56.666 --> 01:20:00.420 align:center
Kailangan lang mangyari
'yong mga trauma sa buhay mo.

01:20:00.504 --> 01:20:02.547 align:center
Di basta magbubukas ang mga pagkakataon.

01:20:08.553 --> 01:20:09.429 align:center
Sige, talon.

01:20:10.180 --> 01:20:12.224 align:center
Iniisip mo kung ano'ng mangyayari.

01:20:12.307 --> 01:20:13.767 align:center
Ina-absorb ko pa.

01:20:14.267 --> 01:20:15.435 align:center
Ang astig.

01:20:20.690 --> 01:20:24.653 align:center
Gusto kong malaman mo
na nandito lang ako kung kailangan mo ako,

01:20:24.736 --> 01:20:27.989 align:center
pero nasasabi mo
kung ano'ng kailangan mo sa buhay.

01:20:28.073 --> 01:20:29.449 align:center
Kailangan mo ako ngayon,

01:20:29.533 --> 01:20:33.662 align:center
at masaya akong ibigay
ang espasyong ito para makapagkuwento ka.

01:20:33.745 --> 01:20:37.958 align:center
Kaya masaya akong nagtanong ka,
at masaya akong ginawa mo nga.

01:20:38.542 --> 01:20:41.962 align:center
May mga tanong ka ba para sa 'kin?

01:20:42.045 --> 01:20:44.381 align:center
Oo, meron.

01:20:44.965 --> 01:20:47.592 align:center
Pag-usapan natin, kung kailangan mo.

01:20:47.676 --> 01:20:50.762 align:center
Kailangan. Tingin ko, makakatulong 'yon.

01:20:50.846 --> 01:20:54.057 align:center
-Salamat. Maganda 'yon.
-Oo. Sige.

01:20:54.849 --> 01:20:57.727 align:center
Nakaka-encourage kasi alam ko
kung bakit ko 'to ginagawa.

01:20:57.811 --> 01:20:59.646 align:center
-At alam mo rin 'yon.
-Oo.

01:20:59.729 --> 01:21:01.398 align:center
-Nandiyan 'yong dahilan.
-Oo.

01:21:01.481 --> 01:21:07.487 align:center
'Yong mga magulang na alam na may autism
'yong anak nila o nasa spectrum,

01:21:07.571 --> 01:21:10.407 align:center
pero hindi nila pinipiling
alamin kung ano 'yon…

01:21:10.490 --> 01:21:13.285 align:center
"Hintayin na lang natin,
baka lumipas din."

01:21:14.119 --> 01:21:19.249 align:center
At nakakalungkot 'yon
kasi alam ng batang 'yon

01:21:19.332 --> 01:21:22.586 align:center
na hindi sila kapareho ng ibang mga bata.

01:21:23.169 --> 01:21:27.424 align:center
At sa pagbalewala mo, tinuturuan mo silang
balewalain ang sarili nila.

01:21:27.507 --> 01:21:29.426 align:center
Hindi ko sinasabing masama 'yon.

01:21:29.509 --> 01:21:32.053 align:center
-May pagmamahal do'n.
-Akala nila, 'yon ang tama.

01:21:32.137 --> 01:21:37.601 align:center
Pero bilang isang taong
na-diagnose nang medyo matanda na,

01:21:37.684 --> 01:21:40.854 align:center
sana nalaman ko nang mas maaga.

01:21:41.438 --> 01:21:44.733 align:center
Sana… nalaman ko nang mas maaga.

01:21:44.816 --> 01:21:45.859 align:center
Ako rin.

01:21:46.651 --> 01:21:49.487 align:center
-Oo.
-Bakit di mo kunin 'yong camera kay Alex?

01:21:50.113 --> 01:21:51.823 align:center
-Okay.
-Itutok mo sa kanya.

01:21:51.907 --> 01:21:53.074 align:center
-Ay, okay.
-Ayos lang?

01:21:53.158 --> 01:21:54.367 align:center
-Oo.
-Naka-on?

01:21:55.160 --> 01:21:57.412 align:center
-Naka-on. Naka-"recording" ba?
-Oo.

01:22:09.549 --> 01:22:10.634 align:center
Alex!

01:22:13.053 --> 01:22:15.263 align:center
-Maraming nangyayari.
-Oo.

01:22:15.347 --> 01:22:17.098 align:center
-Hanggang ngayon.
-Oo.

01:22:17.182 --> 01:22:21.144 align:center
Iniisip ko lang
kung nasa'n ka na sa rollercoaster.

01:22:21.645 --> 01:22:22.520 align:center
Magsalita ka.

01:22:22.604 --> 01:22:24.773 align:center
Wala akong masasabi sa 'yo.

01:22:28.068 --> 01:22:29.945 align:center
Alam ko na. Stressed ka ba?

01:22:30.028 --> 01:22:32.197 align:center
Hindi. Parang may mas okay pa.

01:22:32.280 --> 01:22:34.532 align:center
Well, maswerte akong nahanap kita.

01:22:34.616 --> 01:22:35.700 align:center
Wag muna.

01:22:37.827 --> 01:22:40.747 align:center
-Kung kailan at paano.
-Wow, ang ganda.

01:22:40.830 --> 01:22:42.374 align:center
Pa'no natin nahanap ang isa't isa.

01:22:42.457 --> 01:22:46.753 align:center
Para sa dahilan na nagiging
mas malaki kaysa sa ating dalawa.

01:22:46.836 --> 01:22:48.630 align:center
Naiintindihan ko 'yan.

01:22:49.130 --> 01:22:51.216 align:center
Isa ka sa pinakamalalapit kong kaibigan.

01:22:51.800 --> 01:22:52.926 align:center
Nasa'n si Alex?

01:22:54.844 --> 01:22:58.223 align:center
Pero na-realize kong
mas magkatulad tayo kaysa sa inakala ko.

01:22:59.099 --> 01:23:00.725 align:center
Alam mong ayoko nito.

01:23:01.685 --> 01:23:04.479 align:center
Kasi kaya mong itago 'yon sa lahat.

01:23:04.562 --> 01:23:06.815 align:center
Walang edad sa pagiging espesyal.

01:23:06.898 --> 01:23:08.775 align:center
Pero parang nakikita na kita,

01:23:09.859 --> 01:23:11.695 align:center
'yong totoong nakikita talaga.

01:23:13.655 --> 01:23:18.243 align:center
Napagtanto kong isa kang… salamin.

01:23:21.663 --> 01:23:26.084 align:center
May iba bang nakakaalam na may autism ka
bukod sa 'kin at kay Dr. Gilbert?

01:23:26.167 --> 01:23:27.001 align:center
Wala na.

01:23:28.044 --> 01:23:33.800 align:center
Tinatago mo 'yong mga bahagi
ng sarili mo na ayaw mo.

01:23:33.883 --> 01:23:34.718 align:center
Oo.

01:23:34.801 --> 01:23:37.470 align:center
Ngayon, pinapalantad naman sa 'yo
'yong mga bahaging 'yon

01:23:37.554 --> 01:23:40.765 align:center
na buong buhay mong pinaghirapang itago.

01:23:40.849 --> 01:23:44.185 align:center
Dumating sa punto na— Nawasak na 'yon.

01:23:44.269 --> 01:23:47.856 align:center
Oo, tapos a few years ago,
nag-shut down ako.

01:23:48.356 --> 01:23:51.276 align:center
Di ko alam ang gagawin.
Doon talaga ako lumala.

01:23:51.359 --> 01:23:55.071 align:center
Naapektuhan na 'yong trabaho,
pamilya, at mga kaibigan ko.

01:23:55.155 --> 01:23:57.157 align:center
Wala— Wala akong magawa.

01:23:57.240 --> 01:23:59.993 align:center
Saan mo nararamdaman
'yong lungkot sa katawan mo?

01:24:00.493 --> 01:24:01.327 align:center
Kahit saan.

01:24:01.411 --> 01:24:02.996 align:center
Nawawalan ka ng masasabi.

01:24:03.079 --> 01:24:04.289 align:center
-Oo. Naiintindihan ko.
-Oo.

01:24:04.372 --> 01:24:07.625 align:center
Di ko na matingnan sa mata
at makausap ang mga tao.

01:24:07.709 --> 01:24:09.210 align:center
Bakit kaya gano'n tayo?

01:24:09.294 --> 01:24:12.255 align:center
May mga tanong na may kinalaman
sa damdamin at emosyon.

01:24:12.338 --> 01:24:14.883 align:center
At una 'yong kaligayahan.

01:24:14.966 --> 01:24:16.593 align:center
Ano'ng nagpapasaya sa 'yo?

01:24:17.093 --> 01:24:18.845 align:center
-Pamilya ko.
-Oo.

01:24:18.928 --> 01:24:20.889 align:center
Maswerte ako pagdating diyan.

01:24:20.972 --> 01:24:22.307 align:center
Uy, Ma.

01:24:22.390 --> 01:24:23.725 align:center
-Hi, anak.
-Kumusta?

01:24:23.808 --> 01:24:25.226 align:center
-Nagvi-video ka?
-Oo.

01:24:25.310 --> 01:24:27.187 align:center
-Naku.
-Magsabi ka ng something sweet.

01:24:27.270 --> 01:24:28.396 align:center
-I love you.
-Salamat.

01:24:28.480 --> 01:24:30.648 align:center
-At masaya ako para sa 'yo.
-Salamat, Ma.

01:24:34.235 --> 01:24:36.571 align:center
Tingnan n'yo 'yong Hammer boys.

01:24:36.654 --> 01:24:39.657 align:center
Inspirasyon ko 'yong kapatid ko
kasi idolo ko siya.

01:24:40.408 --> 01:24:42.619 align:center
Kasi sa kanya talaga ako nagmana.

01:24:42.702 --> 01:24:45.163 align:center
-Alam kong malapit ka sa kanya.
-Sobra.

01:24:45.246 --> 01:24:46.081 align:center
Baliw siya.

01:24:46.998 --> 01:24:48.625 align:center
Tapos si Miguel.

01:24:49.834 --> 01:24:52.045 align:center
Mahal na mahal ko 'yon.
Madalas ko 'yong maisip.

01:24:52.128 --> 01:24:55.340 align:center
Kung wala si Miguel,
kung di kami nagkakilala,

01:24:55.423 --> 01:24:57.092 align:center
di ko alam kung nasaan ako.

01:25:00.637 --> 01:25:05.600 align:center
Nakita ko 'yong diagnosis sa 'yo,
at pasok ka sa criteria.

01:25:05.683 --> 01:25:07.685 align:center
Ano'ng masasabi mo roon?

01:25:07.769 --> 01:25:11.648 align:center
Di ko talaga inaasahang marinig 'yon.

01:25:11.731 --> 01:25:14.025 align:center
Ano'ng nararamdaman mo ngayon?

01:25:15.235 --> 01:25:16.861 align:center
Di ko lang in-expect.

01:25:16.945 --> 01:25:20.240 align:center
Madalas sabihin ng mga tao,
"Di ka mukhang autistic."

01:25:20.323 --> 01:25:23.576 align:center
"Di ka mukhang gano'n."
O kaya "Ano naman?"

01:25:23.660 --> 01:25:26.830 align:center
Dahil alam kong may mga tao
na mas matindi ang kaso,

01:25:26.913 --> 01:25:29.541 align:center
iniisip ko na mas kailangan nila 'yon.

01:25:29.624 --> 01:25:31.334 align:center
'Yong ma-diagnose ako,

01:25:31.417 --> 01:25:33.670 align:center
parang inaagawan ko 'yong iba.

01:25:33.753 --> 01:25:35.130 align:center
-Ewan ko kung bakit.
-Oo.

01:25:35.213 --> 01:25:36.047 align:center
Adult ka na,

01:25:36.130 --> 01:25:39.259 align:center
nalampasan mo na
'yong pinakamahirap na part.

01:25:39.342 --> 01:25:40.552 align:center
'Yan ang madalas iniisip.

01:25:40.635 --> 01:25:43.972 align:center
Pagkatapos ng matagal na panahong
pinapatunayan mong kaya mo,

01:25:44.055 --> 01:25:47.684 align:center
bakit mo gugustuhing magkaro'n
ng pangit na label, gaya ng autism?

01:25:47.767 --> 01:25:51.312 align:center
Bakit ayaw mong piliin
na magpanggap na neurotypical?

01:25:51.396 --> 01:25:54.190 align:center
Bakit mo ilalantad
ang sarili mo nang gano'n?

01:25:54.274 --> 01:25:57.735 align:center
-'Yon 'yong sinasabi nila.
-Oo, pagod na akong magpanggap.

01:25:58.236 --> 01:26:00.822 align:center
-'Yon ang kailangang baguhin.
-Oo.

01:26:02.490 --> 01:26:03.408 align:center
HINDI TOTOO

01:26:05.034 --> 01:26:06.161 align:center
Handa na ba kayo?

01:26:25.638 --> 01:26:26.848 align:center
Medyo duda ako do'n.

01:26:26.931 --> 01:26:30.518 align:center
-Ewan ko kung masyadong weird.
-Hindi, mas marami pa dapat.

01:26:30.602 --> 01:26:32.270 align:center
Sobrang astig.

01:26:33.521 --> 01:26:36.608 align:center
-Alam mong film editor ako.
-Ano'ng pakiramdam no'n?

01:26:36.691 --> 01:26:41.196 align:center
Parang nagso-solve ng puzzle na merong
walang-hanggang possible combinations.

01:26:41.279 --> 01:26:45.533 align:center
habang dinidisenyo mo din
'yong mismong puzzle kasabay no'n.

01:26:46.743 --> 01:26:51.873 align:center
Gusto ko 'to kasi natutuhan kong
wired lang talaga 'yong utak ko

01:26:51.956 --> 01:26:54.918 align:center
para magproseso, makakita,
at makabuo ng kung ano nang naiiba.

01:26:55.001 --> 01:26:55.919 align:center
Tama.

01:26:56.002 --> 01:26:58.504 align:center
'Yong tagumpay, dala 'yon
ng pagiging obsessed do'n,

01:26:58.588 --> 01:27:01.257 align:center
pero di pagpansin sa mga limitasyon ko.

01:27:01.341 --> 01:27:02.300 align:center
Totoo.

01:27:04.510 --> 01:27:05.970 align:center
Pasiklabin na 'yan!

01:27:06.054 --> 01:27:07.263 align:center
Go, Hammer!

01:27:10.141 --> 01:27:13.436 align:center
Tulad mo, no'ng magsimula akong
mabuhay sa career na 'to,

01:27:13.519 --> 01:27:16.439 align:center
bilang artist,
parang nawala 'yong purpose ko.

01:27:19.150 --> 01:27:22.153 align:center
Di ko naintindihan
'yong complexities, politika,

01:27:22.237 --> 01:27:24.989 align:center
at pagkawala ng tiwala ko sa maraming tao.

01:27:26.199 --> 01:27:30.370 align:center
'Yon ay— 'Yon 'yong resultang
di ako natutuwa na nangyari sa 'kin.

01:27:30.453 --> 01:27:32.997 align:center
-Di ko alam ang sinasabi ko.
-Hindi, nagpapaliwanag ka.

01:27:33.081 --> 01:27:38.586 align:center
Mabilis akong magtiwala sa mga tao,
sobra pa nga minsan.

01:27:38.670 --> 01:27:42.423 align:center
Iniisip kong totoo 'yong ginagawa nila
kahit paimbabaw lang.

01:27:42.507 --> 01:27:46.052 align:center
At nagiging dahilan 'yon para maabuso ka.

01:27:46.135 --> 01:27:47.929 align:center
Doon ako nahihirapan.

01:27:48.012 --> 01:27:51.307 align:center
Alam mo, katulad mo,
kaya kong lagpasan ang kahit ano,

01:27:51.391 --> 01:27:56.104 align:center
pero katulad mo,
napapagod ako nang todo at nabu-burn out.

01:27:56.187 --> 01:27:59.357 align:center
Di ko alam 'yong autistic burnout,
kaya di ko alam paano labanan.

01:27:59.440 --> 01:28:00.400 align:center
Totoo.

01:28:00.483 --> 01:28:03.528 align:center
Pati 'yong best friend kong si Ray.

01:28:04.279 --> 01:28:05.154 align:center
Ayos!

01:28:05.238 --> 01:28:08.741 align:center
Ayokong kinukunan ng camera,
pero para sa inyo, sige. Love you.

01:28:08.825 --> 01:28:10.243 align:center
Parehong-pareho kami.

01:28:10.743 --> 01:28:12.996 align:center
-Parehong-pareho talaga.
-Oo.

01:28:13.079 --> 01:28:14.539 align:center
Kilala ko siya.

01:28:14.622 --> 01:28:18.167 align:center
Alam ko 'yong takot at galit niya,
pati 'yong ipinapakita niya sa mundo,

01:28:18.251 --> 01:28:20.128 align:center
na magkaibang-magkaiba.

01:28:21.546 --> 01:28:26.134 align:center
'Yon nga lang, may nakakausap si Ray
tungkol sa kahit ano. Ako, wala.

01:28:27.635 --> 01:28:29.804 align:center
Palakaibigan siya.

01:28:30.513 --> 01:28:32.307 align:center
-Pero pambawi niya 'yon.
-Okay.

01:28:32.390 --> 01:28:34.142 align:center
Tulad kay Jenn,

01:28:34.225 --> 01:28:39.605 align:center
nakita ko 'yong side ni Ray
na iilan lang ang nakakita.

01:28:39.689 --> 01:28:40.982 align:center
At nakita ko ang sarili ko.

01:28:41.482 --> 01:28:42.900 align:center
Isa siyang liwanag.

01:28:43.568 --> 01:28:44.777 align:center
Liwanag siya ng buhay ko.

01:28:46.112 --> 01:28:48.031 align:center
Ilang taon na ang nakakalipas,

01:28:49.407 --> 01:28:55.747 align:center
nagpakamatay siya
sa pagtalon sa bintana ng isang building.

01:28:57.415 --> 01:29:00.168 align:center
At di ko maiwasang isipin

01:29:00.251 --> 01:29:05.298 align:center
na kung alam namin pareho
'yong alam ko ngayon,

01:29:05.381 --> 01:29:09.427 align:center
sa tamang tools, baka nakapili pa siya
ng mas magandang landas.

01:29:09.510 --> 01:29:15.141 align:center
SIYAM NA BESES NA MAS POSIBLENG MAMATAY
SA SUICIDE ANG MGA TAONG MAY AUTISM.

01:29:15.224 --> 01:29:17.935 align:center
Masaya ang pag-usapan natin.
Ano'ng tingin mo sa pelikula?

01:29:18.019 --> 01:29:20.355 align:center
Iniisip kong baguhin lahat.

01:29:21.022 --> 01:29:25.693 align:center
Ano'ng iniisip mo? Parang nage-gets kita.

01:29:25.777 --> 01:29:29.697 align:center
Mababago ang pananaw mo
dala ng mga karanasan mo sa totoong buhay.

01:29:29.781 --> 01:29:32.116 align:center
Habang ikinukuwento mo 'yong kuwento ko,

01:29:32.200 --> 01:29:35.119 align:center
'yong experience mo
at 'yong point of view mo,

01:29:35.203 --> 01:29:37.455 align:center
malaking bahagi 'yon ng ginagawa mo.

01:29:37.538 --> 01:29:39.290 align:center
Dapat nando'n ka rin.

01:29:39.374 --> 01:29:41.918 align:center
Hindi ka madalas na nagkukuwento.

01:29:42.001 --> 01:29:45.213 align:center
Ipinapakita mo
'yong gustong ikuwento ng iba.

01:29:45.296 --> 01:29:48.132 align:center
Kaya ibang focus 'to para sa 'yo.

01:29:48.216 --> 01:29:49.884 align:center
-Nakakatakot lang.
-Oo.

01:29:49.967 --> 01:29:52.011 align:center
Dahil di ako kasali no'ng una,

01:29:52.095 --> 01:29:54.889 align:center
pero 'yon lang ang kuwento namin.

01:29:54.972 --> 01:29:58.309 align:center
Di ako nagkukuwento
tungkol sa kahit ano, sa totoo lang.

01:29:58.393 --> 01:30:01.771 align:center
Di ko pa nagawa 'yon dati,
kahit kay Miguel.

01:30:01.854 --> 01:30:04.357 align:center
Kasi lagi kong iniisip na…

01:30:05.108 --> 01:30:06.818 align:center
Ano'ng kinatatakutan mo?

01:30:06.901 --> 01:30:09.404 align:center
'Yong kahihiyan, alam mo 'yon?
Ewan ko kung bakit.

01:30:09.487 --> 01:30:13.324 align:center
Mahirap talagang lampasan
'yong parteng 'yon

01:30:14.283 --> 01:30:17.286 align:center
kasi di ako lubos na nababagay kahit saan.

01:30:17.370 --> 01:30:20.415 align:center
Kaya naghahanap ako ng approval
kung saan-saan,

01:30:20.498 --> 01:30:26.337 align:center
na naging dahilan para madali akong
manipulahin sa mga bagay gaya ng…

01:30:29.382 --> 01:30:31.592 align:center
sexual— child sex abuse.

01:30:31.676 --> 01:30:33.386 align:center
Grabe.

01:30:33.469 --> 01:30:35.680 align:center
Di ko pa talaga nasasabi 'yon.

01:30:35.763 --> 01:30:38.015 align:center
Ilang taon ka no'ng nagsimula 'yon?

01:30:38.099 --> 01:30:41.060 align:center
Mga five or six yata.

01:30:41.144 --> 01:30:42.979 align:center
Wow. Ang bata mo pa.

01:30:43.563 --> 01:30:44.981 align:center
-Oo.
-Alex.

01:30:45.690 --> 01:30:49.152 align:center
Ang mahirap din sa pang-aabuso,
napakamalihim nito.

01:30:51.112 --> 01:30:56.242 align:center
Sa kasamaang-palad, tinuruan ka
ng taong 'yon na magtago at manahimik,

01:30:56.325 --> 01:30:57.743 align:center
na huwag maging ikaw.

01:30:59.912 --> 01:31:03.499 align:center
Mas mataas ang correlation nito
kaysa sa neurotypical population.

01:31:03.583 --> 01:31:07.628 align:center
Natatakot ako noong mapagkamalang bakla.

01:31:07.712 --> 01:31:09.046 align:center
Okay.

01:31:09.130 --> 01:31:12.467 align:center
'Yon ang pinakakinatatakutan ko,
kaya yata ako nanahimik.

01:31:13.551 --> 01:31:14.927 align:center
Di ko maintindihan noon.

01:31:15.970 --> 01:31:18.764 align:center
Pero sinasabi ng mundo noon,
masama ang pagiging bakla.

01:31:18.848 --> 01:31:21.267 align:center
No'ng bata ka,
ano'ng kinatakutan mong mangyari?

01:31:21.350 --> 01:31:25.646 align:center
Na hindi ako mamahalin, at bibitawan.

01:31:27.982 --> 01:31:31.944 align:center
Alam ko na ngayong
hinding-hindi 'yon mangyayari.

01:31:32.445 --> 01:31:37.700 align:center
Nakakapagod 'yon, Alex,
na itago 'yon nang matagal.

01:31:37.783 --> 01:31:39.994 align:center
'Yong matutuhan kong makipag-usap sa 'yo,

01:31:40.578 --> 01:31:44.373 align:center
mas napadali no'n para sa 'kin
ang makipag-connect kay Miguel.

01:31:44.457 --> 01:31:49.587 align:center
Di ko inakalang makakausap ko siya
nang ganito, nang hindi natatakot.

01:31:49.670 --> 01:31:53.549 align:center
Miss— Na-miss ko 'yon kay Ray.

01:31:53.633 --> 01:31:57.595 align:center
Pero ngayon, si Jenn na
ang naging gano'n ang role para sa 'kin.

01:31:58.930 --> 01:32:02.767 align:center
Kasi pwede kaming mag-process
nang magkasama, imbes na mag-isa.

01:32:02.850 --> 01:32:05.228 align:center
Nagtatago lang ako kapag lumalala na.

01:32:06.103 --> 01:32:08.564 align:center
Sobrang dami nating pagkakapareho.

01:32:08.648 --> 01:32:10.608 align:center
-Nakakatawa.
-Alam ko.

01:32:10.691 --> 01:32:13.110 align:center
-Gusto niyang maging sober.
-Totoo.

01:32:13.194 --> 01:32:14.987 align:center
-Matagal na.
-Oo.

01:32:15.071 --> 01:32:16.447 align:center
Walang…

01:32:16.531 --> 01:32:21.869 align:center
Sinusubukan kong magpakita,
maging matapang, i-share lahat.

01:32:22.370 --> 01:32:24.205 align:center
Mahalaga talaga 'yon sa akin.

01:32:24.288 --> 01:32:27.291 align:center
Pero ito 'yong bagay
na ikinahihiya ko talaga.

01:32:27.375 --> 01:32:32.046 align:center
-Kaya pakiramdam ko, parang…
-Oo.

01:32:32.129 --> 01:32:36.676 align:center
Para akong—
Para akong isang kasinungalingan.

01:32:36.759 --> 01:32:40.304 align:center
Ang depression at anxiety,
pwedeng sumabay 'yon sa ASD.

01:32:40.388 --> 01:32:43.766 align:center
Madalas, umiinom ng alcohol
ang mga tao para kumalma

01:32:43.849 --> 01:32:48.062 align:center
kasi napapadali nito
ang mga gano'ng sitwasyon.

01:32:48.145 --> 01:32:52.817 align:center
Umiiyak siya, sabi niya,
"Nag-aalala ako na pag di kita iniwan,

01:32:52.900 --> 01:32:56.362 align:center
di ako matitigil sa pagkalango,
at ayokong mawala ka."

01:32:56.445 --> 01:32:59.115 align:center
At sa tingin ko, doon ako napa…

01:32:59.198 --> 01:33:00.491 align:center
"Pucha."

01:33:00.575 --> 01:33:02.034 align:center
"Pucha talaga."

01:33:02.118 --> 01:33:04.495 align:center
Basta, mahal ko talaga kayo.

01:33:04.579 --> 01:33:08.874 align:center
At baka isa ako sa mas nakakaintindi.

01:33:08.958 --> 01:33:10.835 align:center
Medyo nauna lang ako sa 'yo.

01:33:10.918 --> 01:33:12.461 align:center
-'Yon lang. Medyo lang.
-Oo.

01:33:12.545 --> 01:33:15.339 align:center
-Kagaya mo sa autism.
-Oo.

01:33:15.423 --> 01:33:17.967 align:center
-Basta nandito ako para sumuporta.
-Salamat.

01:33:18.050 --> 01:33:21.304 align:center
Habang lalo kang nagsasalita,
mas makikita ka ng mga tao

01:33:21.387 --> 01:33:25.474 align:center
at mas mamahalin ka,
mas maniniwala kang mahalaga ka.

01:33:25.558 --> 01:33:27.768 align:center
Mahalaga ka sa mundo.

01:33:27.852 --> 01:33:28.728 align:center
Tama.

01:33:33.065 --> 01:33:35.985 align:center
Ito 'yong mga rason
kung bakit nagsusumikap akong

01:33:36.068 --> 01:33:37.737 align:center
intindihin 'yong utak ko

01:33:37.820 --> 01:33:40.156 align:center
bago pa man ako ma-diagnose.

01:33:41.157 --> 01:33:43.659 align:center
Kasi takot na takot ako.

01:33:45.703 --> 01:33:49.457 align:center
Ayokong umabot sa puntong
parang wala nang ibang pagpipilian,

01:33:49.540 --> 01:33:51.459 align:center
kundi sukuan ang lahat.

01:33:51.542 --> 01:33:53.878 align:center
SA PERSONALIZED SUPPORT
PARA SA LEVELS 1, 2, AT 3,

01:33:53.961 --> 01:33:56.797 align:center
MAS MALAKI ANG TSANSANG
UMUNLAD ANG TAONG MAY AUTISM.

01:33:56.881 --> 01:33:57.715 align:center
Ian.

01:33:58.591 --> 01:33:59.884 align:center
-Ian.
-O?

01:33:59.967 --> 01:34:01.344 align:center
Di kita makita.

01:34:01.969 --> 01:34:03.137 align:center
Di ktia makita.

01:34:03.220 --> 01:34:06.390 align:center
Hindi. Gusto kitang makita.
Para alam ko kung nasaan ka.

01:34:24.742 --> 01:34:25.576 align:center
Nasaan tayo?

01:34:27.411 --> 01:34:29.080 align:center
Sa Jacob's Pillow.

01:34:31.332 --> 01:34:34.377 align:center
Sa pinakamagandang studio sa America.

01:34:39.465 --> 01:34:40.716 align:center
Nasa'n tayo?

01:34:40.800 --> 01:34:44.595 align:center
Nandito tayo sa Church sa Sag Harbor.

01:34:44.679 --> 01:34:46.847 align:center
Mahiwaga ang lugar na 'to.

01:34:47.973 --> 01:34:51.936 align:center
Lahat ng organisasyong ito,
di lang nag-donate ng space sa 'min,

01:34:52.019 --> 01:34:54.438 align:center
pero higit sa lahat, oras.

01:34:56.399 --> 01:35:01.028 align:center
Inaabot ng maraming taon at gastos
ang paggawa ng show na gaya nito.

01:35:01.112 --> 01:35:02.822 align:center
MAY PERFORMANCE - BAWAL PUMASOK

01:35:03.614 --> 01:35:05.991 align:center
Sa art form namin at sa maraming lugar,

01:35:06.075 --> 01:35:08.869 align:center
may recipe na matagal nang di nag-iiba

01:35:08.953 --> 01:35:10.871 align:center
at hindi na gumagana.

01:35:10.955 --> 01:35:13.416 align:center
At kung mapapalambot natin 'yon,

01:35:13.499 --> 01:35:15.501 align:center
at i-explore natin 'yon nang magkasama,

01:35:16.085 --> 01:35:20.756 align:center
at hindi ituring na kapintasan
o hadlang ang mga sitwasyong ito…

01:35:20.840 --> 01:35:23.676 align:center
At baka mas matagal pa ang abutin,

01:35:23.759 --> 01:35:26.095 align:center
pero ano'ng mangyayari
kung bibigyan mo ng oras

01:35:26.178 --> 01:35:29.765 align:center
ang isang magandang isip
na tumalakay ng idea?

01:35:29.849 --> 01:35:31.308 align:center
Ano kaya ang mangyayari?

01:35:31.392 --> 01:35:32.768 align:center
'Yon ang gusto ko.

01:35:33.769 --> 01:35:35.479 align:center
Para sa mga taong may autism,

01:35:35.563 --> 01:35:42.027 align:center
isa sa pinakakaraniwang stim
ay pagsasayaw ng free improv.

01:35:42.111 --> 01:35:44.947 align:center
Gusto kong panatilihing improvised ito.

01:35:45.030 --> 01:35:47.658 align:center
Mahalagang makapasok at magtanong ng,

01:35:47.742 --> 01:35:50.035 align:center
"Ano'ng kailangan mo?"
Hindi, "Ano'ng mali?"

01:35:50.119 --> 01:35:54.373 align:center
Sa kaso niya, di sinusubukan ni Jenn
na gamutin o ayusin 'yon.

01:35:54.457 --> 01:35:55.416 align:center
Awareness 'yon.

01:35:56.459 --> 01:36:00.212 align:center
'Yong malinaw na masabing
kuwento ko lang ito,

01:36:00.296 --> 01:36:05.050 align:center
at wala akong interes na gumawa
ng pangmalawakan o grand statement

01:36:05.134 --> 01:36:09.180 align:center
tungkol sa autism in general
o sa karanasan ng iba.

01:36:09.263 --> 01:36:11.932 align:center
At mahalaga 'yon dahil spectrum ang autism

01:36:12.016 --> 01:36:17.354 align:center
at iba't iba
ang suportang kailangan ng mga tao.

01:36:17.438 --> 01:36:18.689 align:center
'Yong pagdating no'n,

01:36:18.773 --> 01:36:22.067 align:center
sa tingin ko, makakatulong 'yon sa braso

01:36:22.151 --> 01:36:24.028 align:center
para may diin 'yong tigil, oo.

01:36:24.111 --> 01:36:28.824 align:center
'Yong realization na di na mababago
'yong utak ko,

01:36:28.908 --> 01:36:31.535 align:center
'yon 'yong pinaka-liberating talaga.

01:36:33.162 --> 01:36:36.749 align:center
May mga tanong ba
bago tayo magsimula? Kahit ano?

01:36:37.458 --> 01:36:39.335 align:center
Oo, magiging masaya 'to.

01:36:39.919 --> 01:36:41.003 align:center
Oo.

01:37:07.112 --> 01:37:11.075 align:center
Sinusubukan naming gumamit ng language
mula sa actual diagnostic criteria.

01:37:11.158 --> 01:37:14.995 align:center
At sa tingin ko, napakainteresanteng
makita 'yong pormal na pananalita

01:37:15.079 --> 01:37:19.375 align:center
na inihanay sa karanasan ng tao.

01:37:19.458 --> 01:37:22.670 align:center
Pag binasa mo 'yong DSM criteria
para sa autism,

01:37:22.753 --> 01:37:24.380 align:center
sobrang pormal.

01:37:24.463 --> 01:37:26.924 align:center
'Yong unang salita ng bawat katangian,

01:37:27.007 --> 01:37:31.095 align:center
"kabiguan, hindi normal,
kawalang kakayahan, kakulangan."

01:37:31.178 --> 01:37:33.848 align:center
Tapos kung paano 'yon i-describe
ng therapist ko,

01:37:33.931 --> 01:37:37.393 align:center
napakaganda at napaka-positive.

01:37:37.476 --> 01:37:42.690 align:center
Kaya 'yong makita ang mga salitang 'yon,
tapos 'yong video ng isang bata,

01:37:42.773 --> 01:37:44.567 align:center
parang hindi tugma.

01:37:44.650 --> 01:37:45.484 align:center
Oo.

01:37:48.195 --> 01:37:49.905 align:center
Minsan, may kung ano.

01:37:49.989 --> 01:37:51.490 align:center
Oo, pareho tayo.

01:37:51.574 --> 01:37:53.117 align:center
Ano

01:37:53.826 --> 01:37:56.078 align:center
Ano'ng ginawa mo

01:37:56.161 --> 01:38:03.168 align:center
Noong hindi ka na magkasya
sa 'yong pulang bestida

01:38:05.170 --> 01:38:08.340 align:center
Di kita tinanong

01:38:08.424 --> 01:38:10.509 align:center
Di kita tinanong

01:38:10.593 --> 01:38:12.428 align:center
-Kuha ko na!
-Yehey!

01:38:12.511 --> 01:38:14.430 align:center
-Ayos!
-Para talaga 'to diyan.

01:38:21.729 --> 01:38:23.147 align:center
Sabihin mo kung nasaan tayo.

01:38:24.273 --> 01:38:26.609 align:center
-Di kita marinig. Lakasan mo.
-La Jolla.

01:38:26.692 --> 01:38:29.612 align:center
-La Jolla?
-La Jolla? Ikaw ba 'yan? Hi.

01:38:30.112 --> 01:38:31.864 align:center
Oo, gusto namin.

01:38:31.947 --> 01:38:33.866 align:center
Tatlong buwan, gusto namin 'yan.

01:38:33.949 --> 01:38:35.409 align:center
Maraming salamat, bye.

01:38:35.492 --> 01:38:39.371 align:center
Nasa sikat na La Jolla Playhouse kami,

01:38:40.039 --> 01:38:41.874 align:center
sa rehearsal room namin

01:38:42.625 --> 01:38:44.335 align:center
sa La Jolla, California.

01:38:46.795 --> 01:38:48.005 align:center
First day.

01:38:48.088 --> 01:38:49.381 align:center
First day!

01:38:53.552 --> 01:38:56.305 align:center
Dito natin makikita 'yong alaala

01:38:57.097 --> 01:38:59.933 align:center
at mahalagang makita
'yong tractor at manika.

01:39:01.560 --> 01:39:04.813 align:center
Kinomisyon din ng La Jolla Playhouse
'yong show namin.

01:39:05.564 --> 01:39:09.109 align:center
Sa tingin ko, kami 'yong unang dance piece

01:39:09.193 --> 01:39:11.195 align:center
na naging bahagi ng main season,

01:39:11.278 --> 01:39:15.240 align:center
at para talagang panaginip

01:39:15.324 --> 01:39:17.576 align:center
na makapunta rito,

01:39:17.660 --> 01:39:19.954 align:center
magkaro'n ng creative process,

01:39:20.037 --> 01:39:22.456 align:center
ng pagkakataong makapag-perform,

01:39:22.539 --> 01:39:25.292 align:center
mabigo, matuto, at lumago.

01:39:25.376 --> 01:39:27.920 align:center
-Okay. Yehey!
-Good luck sa show!

01:39:30.631 --> 01:39:33.384 align:center
Ramdam na ramdam mo 'yong suporta nila.

01:40:07.251 --> 01:40:09.086 align:center
Yehey!

01:40:09.169 --> 01:40:12.923 align:center
Napakasayang magkaro'n
ng ganitong pagkakataon na mangarap.

01:40:13.007 --> 01:40:14.508 align:center
Sobrang ganda.

01:40:20.180 --> 01:40:23.517 align:center
ARTS & CULTURE
BUHAY SA SPECTRUM

01:40:29.857 --> 01:40:30.941 align:center
Itaas mo.

01:40:34.737 --> 01:40:36.739 align:center
Tama pa 'yong spelling ng name mo.

01:40:40.034 --> 01:40:41.410 align:center
Huwebes na ba?

01:40:44.997 --> 01:40:46.498 align:center
Huwebes na ba?

01:40:48.792 --> 01:40:53.005 align:center
Huwebes na ba?

01:40:56.884 --> 01:40:58.761 align:center
Kailan ulit ako sasayaw?

01:40:58.844 --> 01:41:01.346 align:center
HUWEBES NA BA?

01:41:01.430 --> 01:41:03.265 align:center
No'ng bata si Jenn,

01:41:04.224 --> 01:41:05.517 align:center
tuwing Huwebes ang sayaw.

01:41:07.102 --> 01:41:09.146 align:center
Kahit Lunes pa lang,

01:41:09.229 --> 01:41:11.065 align:center
tinatanong niya, "Huwebes na ba?"

01:41:11.148 --> 01:41:12.649 align:center
-Ano?
-Paulit-ulit.

01:41:16.445 --> 01:41:20.324 align:center
Iniisip ko no'n, "Dapat Huwebes na,
kailangan kong sumayaw araw-araw,"

01:41:20.407 --> 01:41:23.076 align:center
pero di ko alam noon
kung paano sabihin 'yon.

01:41:23.160 --> 01:41:24.828 align:center
Kailan ulit ako sasayaw?

01:41:24.912 --> 01:41:31.001 align:center
Inaabangan kong mag-Huwebes
dahil napapayapa ako sa araw na 'yon.

01:41:31.835 --> 01:41:33.962 align:center
Ibang klaseng kaayusan ang nadadala no'n.

01:41:34.046 --> 01:41:35.089 align:center
Huwebes na ba?

01:41:35.172 --> 01:41:37.758 align:center
Ang ganda no'n para sa 'kin.

01:41:37.841 --> 01:41:41.970 align:center
Huwebes na ba?

01:41:46.183 --> 01:41:47.643 align:center
Ano'ng mangyayari?

01:41:47.726 --> 01:41:51.522 align:center
Opening night namin sa La Jolla Playhouse

01:41:51.605 --> 01:41:53.690 align:center
at unang beses na may audience.

01:41:55.776 --> 01:41:57.152 align:center
Ano'ng iniisip mo?

01:41:57.236 --> 01:41:58.403 align:center
Proud ako sa atin,

01:41:58.487 --> 01:42:01.240 align:center
di ako makapaniwalang
tatlong taon na pala.

01:42:01.323 --> 01:42:02.866 align:center
-Oo nga.
-Alam mo 'yon?

01:42:05.160 --> 01:42:07.162 align:center
Parang magiging mas emosyonal ako

01:42:08.080 --> 01:42:12.209 align:center
pagkatapos ng show
pag nakita ko na 'yong mga mahal ko.

01:42:19.007 --> 01:42:20.926 align:center
Ewan ko kung ilan ang manonood.

01:42:21.009 --> 01:42:27.432 align:center
Twenty, nineteen, eighteen,
seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, fourteen,

01:42:27.516 --> 01:42:34.356 align:center
thirteen, twelve, eleven,
ten, nine, eight, seven, six…

01:42:34.439 --> 01:42:37.025 align:center
Nakakabaliw. Ano'ng ginagawa natin?

01:42:37.109 --> 01:42:39.528 align:center
…three, two, one.

01:42:57.462 --> 01:43:01.383 align:center
Bilang taong may autism
na kaka-diagnose lang,

01:43:01.466 --> 01:43:05.679 align:center
muli kong natutuklasan ang sarili ko
at kung sino ako bilang artist

01:43:05.762 --> 01:43:09.766 align:center
habang nabubuo 'yong show.

01:43:10.434 --> 01:43:14.771 align:center
Sobrang nagpapasalamat akong
may mga gaya ng PAC at La Jolla Playhouse.

01:43:14.855 --> 01:43:18.859 align:center
Patunay 'yon na handa silang sumugal

01:43:18.942 --> 01:43:22.487 align:center
dahil maraming art ang nagsisimula

01:43:22.571 --> 01:43:27.701 align:center
sa mga di-pangkaraniwan
o di-masukat na paraan.

01:43:28.911 --> 01:43:30.829 align:center
Grabe sa pakiramdam.

01:43:32.331 --> 01:43:34.374 align:center
Proud na proud ako sa 'yo.

01:43:35.375 --> 01:43:37.419 align:center
Salamat. I love you.

01:43:37.502 --> 01:43:38.712 align:center
I love you too.

01:44:15.290 --> 01:44:16.917 align:center
Good morning, Jenn.

01:44:17.834 --> 01:44:18.961 align:center
Simulan na natin.

01:44:48.282 --> 01:44:49.658 align:center
Perfect!

01:44:50.325 --> 01:44:53.036 align:center
-Nakita mo no'ng sinabi mong "Tayo"?
-Sumayaw sila.

01:44:53.120 --> 01:44:53.954 align:center
Oo, sumayaw.

01:45:34.036 --> 01:45:34.995 align:center
Ang galing mo.

01:45:36.747 --> 01:45:37.831 align:center
Proud ako sa 'yo, hon.

01:45:37.914 --> 01:45:39.708 align:center
Mahal na mahal kita.

01:45:39.791 --> 01:45:41.585 align:center
Ang swerte-swerte ko.

01:45:43.170 --> 01:45:46.757 align:center
Labis-labis akong nagpapasalamat
na parte ka ng buhay ko.

01:45:48.884 --> 01:45:49.718 align:center
Diyos ko.

01:45:49.801 --> 01:45:51.845 align:center
Para tayong Spider-Man meme.

01:45:51.928 --> 01:45:54.639 align:center
May autism ka. Teka, may autism ka rin.

01:45:57.267 --> 01:45:58.185 align:center
Alam ko.

01:45:59.269 --> 01:46:00.604 align:center
Pucha!

01:46:00.687 --> 01:46:01.688 align:center
Okay.

01:46:01.772 --> 01:46:04.316 align:center
Alex, tara na. Pipili pa tayo ng outfit.

01:46:05.025 --> 01:46:07.402 align:center
-Babalik ako para i-confirm.
-Pinapaalis ka na.

01:46:08.278 --> 01:46:09.738 align:center
Sigaw ka lang, darating ako.

01:46:09.821 --> 01:46:11.156 align:center
-Sige.
-Love you, babe.

01:46:11.239 --> 01:46:13.784 align:center
-Huling beses mo na akong makikita.
-Oo nga.

01:46:14.284 --> 01:46:17.204 align:center
-Bye. Totoo na 'to.
-Bye. Ang saya.

01:46:21.583 --> 01:46:25.837 align:center
No'ng kontakin mo ako tungkol dito,

01:46:25.921 --> 01:46:28.590 align:center
di mo alam na magiging piyesa itong

01:46:29.424 --> 01:46:31.301 align:center
nakasentro sa autism.

01:46:31.802 --> 01:46:32.719 align:center
Hindi.

01:46:34.805 --> 01:46:37.057 align:center
Gusto mo bang magkaanak ulit
ng may autism?

01:46:38.225 --> 01:46:39.101 align:center
Oo.

01:46:39.184 --> 01:46:41.103 align:center
-Talaga?
-Ikaw ulit ang anak ko.

01:46:41.603 --> 01:46:43.772 align:center
-Ako ulit?
-Oo.

01:46:43.855 --> 01:46:46.942 align:center
At mas maganda
kung mas may pang-unawa ka na,

01:46:47.025 --> 01:46:51.530 align:center
pero kahit wala, uulitin ko pa rin.

01:46:52.155 --> 01:46:53.365 align:center
Hello, love.

01:46:53.448 --> 01:46:54.658 align:center
-Hi, Ma.
-Pa-kiss.

01:46:58.245 --> 01:47:02.332 align:center
Kailangan kong sabihing
mula nang mawala si Ray,

01:47:02.415 --> 01:47:03.875 align:center
bukod kay Miguel,

01:47:04.501 --> 01:47:07.087 align:center
'yong makausap kayo tungkol sa ganito,

01:47:07.170 --> 01:47:14.010 align:center
sobrang espesyal sa 'kin no'n.

01:47:14.094 --> 01:47:14.928 align:center
Oo.

01:47:15.011 --> 01:47:19.724 align:center
Kasi di ako ganito sa iba.

01:47:20.767 --> 01:47:22.936 align:center
Kahit matapos na 'to ngayon,

01:47:23.019 --> 01:47:27.482 align:center
kahit walang suporta sa dokyu,
di ito nagpatuloy, pakiramdam ko…

01:47:27.983 --> 01:47:29.192 align:center
Nagtagumpay pa rin 'to.

01:47:30.068 --> 01:47:32.571 align:center
-Naligtas nito ang buhay n'yo ni Jenn.
-Oo.

01:47:32.654 --> 01:47:34.948 align:center
Medyo madrama 'yon,

01:47:35.490 --> 01:47:37.033 align:center
pero totoo 'yon para sa 'kin.

01:47:37.534 --> 01:47:40.287 align:center
-Para sa pag-ibig at buhay.
-Para sa pag-ibig at buhay.

01:47:40.996 --> 01:47:42.330 align:center
-Wala nang atrasan.
-Wala na.

01:47:43.248 --> 01:47:46.877 align:center
Bago ang diagnosis,
at pagkatapos ang diagnosis lang.

01:47:46.960 --> 01:47:50.338 align:center
-BD at PD.
-Oo, tama.

01:47:50.922 --> 01:47:52.549 align:center
Parang di nga next chapter.

01:47:52.632 --> 01:47:54.509 align:center
-Bagong libro 'to.
-Totoo.

01:47:57.012 --> 01:47:59.806 align:center
Mas marami nang
nakakabuo ng kuwento nila

01:47:59.890 --> 01:48:03.018 align:center
at nagbabahagi ng impormasyon
at nagkaka-access sa impormasyon

01:48:03.101 --> 01:48:06.480 align:center
at nakakakita sa sarili nila
sa mga karanasan ng iba,

01:48:06.563 --> 01:48:07.814 align:center
di sa pagbasa ng libro.

01:48:07.898 --> 01:48:08.732 align:center
Oo.

01:48:09.649 --> 01:48:11.276 align:center
Nagre-research ako

01:48:11.359 --> 01:48:13.987 align:center
tungkol sa movement as therapy
para sa mga may ASD,

01:48:14.070 --> 01:48:18.366 align:center
at excited ako kung paano nito
babaguhin 'yong pagtuturo ko.

01:48:18.450 --> 01:48:20.869 align:center
Oo, pakiramdam ko, magbabago nga.

01:48:20.952 --> 01:48:24.456 align:center
Kung ibabahagi mo 'to sa iba,
makakatulong 'yon para maintindihan nila

01:48:24.539 --> 01:48:29.377 align:center
na pwede nilang i-apply 'yon sa art
o trabaho para makapag-balance sila.

01:48:29.461 --> 01:48:31.129 align:center
Parang maraming halimbawa

01:48:31.213 --> 01:48:35.926 align:center
ng mga taong ligtas na nabuhay
sa dance community,

01:48:36.009 --> 01:48:40.263 align:center
na posibleng hindi naging masigla
at mapayapa ang buhay.

01:48:41.514 --> 01:48:42.849 align:center
Nakikita ko 'yon

01:48:42.933 --> 01:48:47.103 align:center
sa mga estudyante,
kadalasan sa mga nakaka-connect ko talaga.

01:48:48.146 --> 01:48:49.564 align:center
Napakagandang kuwento.

01:48:49.648 --> 01:48:53.777 align:center
'Yong mga mas nangangailangan no'n
nang higit sa inaakala nila.

01:48:56.238 --> 01:48:59.241 align:center
Ikinagagalak akong makatulong sa 'yo.

01:48:59.324 --> 01:49:03.119 align:center
Napakabait mo,
napaka-supportive, napakagaling,

01:49:03.203 --> 01:49:05.830 align:center
hindi ko maipahayag kung gaano…

01:49:05.914 --> 01:49:08.500 align:center
kung gaano ito kaespesyal

01:49:09.125 --> 01:49:11.378 align:center
para— para sa akin, kay Jenn.

01:49:11.461 --> 01:49:13.672 align:center
Di ko alam kung paano kita pasasalamatan.

01:49:13.755 --> 01:49:14.589 align:center
Naku, Alex.

01:49:14.714 --> 01:49:17.175 align:center
Pero pupuntahan kita bilang pasyente.

01:49:17.259 --> 01:49:18.885 align:center
Magbabayad ako.

01:49:18.969 --> 01:49:22.889 align:center
Alex, minsan sa buhay,
hindi pera ang mahalaga.

01:49:57.590 --> 01:49:58.592 align:center
Parang regalo.

01:50:01.344 --> 01:50:03.972 align:center
Parang regalo 'yong diagnosis.

01:50:21.823 --> 01:50:28.371 align:center
PARA KAY RAY

01:52:05.343 --> 01:52:10.348 align:center
Nagsalin ng Subtitle: J. Ignacio
ang mahalaga.