(TELEPHONES RINGING)
- (KEYPAD BEEPING) - JOHN ECONOMOS: So, obviously, that's the bathroom.
And the break room is down there on the right, obviously.
- Um, what else? - REPORTER: (ON TV) Amanda Waller will step aside
- as she faces upcoming congressional hearings. - Oh, check it out. You're on TV.
REPORTER: The president has appointed Rick Flag
as the new acting director of ARGUS...
- (SCOFFS) - (REPORTER SPEAKING ON TV)
What? That's not exciting to you?
I know Waller was all about self-promotion,
but that's not really my bag.
Yeah, A-Dubs did have her quirks.
- What? - Dubs.
- W. Amanda Waller. - Yeah.
You know, this post wasn't my choice,
but I'm not sure the president had any other options, so...
My old pal Rick Flag.
- We're old pals now? - Thought we were.
Are you sucking up to me right now, Economos?
- Just a little. - It's not gonna work.
Yeah, well, it was worth a shot.
And this is your office.
Uh, you need anything else?
- (DOOR CLOSING) - Actually, yes.
I'd like to see a full report of my son's death.
♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Your son? - Rick Flag Jr. was killed
in Corto Maltese.
I tried to get the files immediately after it occurred,
but they said it was classified.
As acting director of ARGUS,
I'd like to take a look at them now.
Is there a problem with that, son?
No. I-- it's just-- I didn't want, you know,
- it to be upsetting? - Upsetting?
I think I can handle it, Economos.
Of cour-- Of course, you can.
It's just that day was complicated
and any actions taken were under the order of Waller,
and most of us didn't even know.
Get me the fucking files, John.
Yes, sir.
♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(EXHALES SOFTLY)
I'm tired of coverin' up their dirty little secrets.
This time, these sons of bitches are gonna be held account--
That information gets out,
it causes an international incident!
Keeping the peace is worth any price.
Including the life of a hero like yours, sir.
- (GRUNTS) - (GROANS)
- (METAL CLANGING) - (GROANS)
(PEACEMAKER GROANS)
(HEARTBEAT POUNDING)
♪ (MUSIC SWELLING) ♪
(HEARTBEAT FADING)
RICK FLAG JUNIOR: Peacemaker. What a joke.
♪ (TENSE MUSIC OVERLAPPING) ♪
- (YELLS) - ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
- Bordeaux. - Sir?
I want a surveillance unit on Christopher Smith,
24/7, immediately.
Sir, the Peacemaker is in our agency's grace
because of his work in Project Butterfly.
Fuck the Peacemaker.
♪ ("OH LORD" BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING) ♪
♪ Julian, it's a hungry world ♪
♪ They're gonna eat you alive Son, yeah ♪
♪ Oh, Julian When their fangs sink in ♪
♪ I'll stitch you, but then ♪
♪ I gotta throw you Back in, oh ♪
♪ You just try and sleep Even though you're alone ♪
♪ You just close your eyes boy And dream of home ♪
♪ And light is always on You just keep that in mind ♪
♪ When you wake in the morning You'll be satisfied ♪
♪ 'Cause there is always A wrong to your right ♪
♪ And there will always be A war somewhere to fight ♪
♪ And God knows I've had Some rough fucking years ♪
♪ Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord ♪
♪ Keep on keepin' on ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ And God knows I've had Some rough fuckin' years ♪
♪ Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord ♪
♪ Keep on keepin' on ♪
- (SQUAWKS) - ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la ♪
♪ (SONG FADES OUT) ♪
♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC STING) ♪
- Oh, shit! - (HELMET CLANGS)
(PEACEMAKER GASPS)
♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
(GROANS) Fuck.
(GRUNTS)
(PANTING)
(GROANS)
(GRUNTS)
Fuck!
(YELLS)
(PANTING)
(DIAL TONE RINGING)
You still have those bone saws?
♪ (TENSE MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(GRUNTING)
(SOBS)
(BARKING)
(GASPS) Hi, babies! Yes! (LAUGHS) Aw!
Come here, come here. Oh yes, I missed you.
Oh, Mommy's missed you guys. Oh, ho, ho.
♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(EXHALES HEAVILY)
(SNIFFLES, SIGHS)
♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
- KEEYA ADEBAYO: Lee? - Oh shit. Fuck.
What are you doing?
(SIGHS) I was on my way over to Chris's,
so I thought I'd stop by and get my hair shit--
You can't just come into this place unannounced.
- I thought you were at work. - KEEYA: It doesn't matter.
You need to text me before coming over.
LEOTA ADEBAYO: Why?
Because that's what civilized people do
when they break up, Lee.
Thought it was just time off.
What's the difference?
A lot.
Okay. (EXHALES)
I'm sorry.
Why are you going to see that lunkhead anyway?
He ain't a lunkhead.
He's, like, being really vulnerable lately.
Sexy new uniform.
You doing okay otherwise?
Other than what?
Other than having to wear that uniform, I guess.
That's funny?
Man, you just-- you're salty for no reason.
- Oh, for no reason? - I mean.
No reason? Okay, other than you changing
every single aspect of our relationship,
every single plan that we had, overnight?
We were supposed to be going back to Gotham, Lee.
And now what?
You're staying here to start a-- a-- a spy business?
People gotta follow their dreams, Key.
- Even you said that. - Yeah, not when their dreams
are leeching off of somebody else's reality.
- LEOTA: I'll go... - (KEEYA SCOFFS)
...because this is gonna end stupid.
KEEYA: It started stupid
when you broke into my apartment.
All right.
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
(PACKAGING RUSTLING)
Love you.
KEEYA: (MUTTERS) Fuck.
♪ ( UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS) ♪
- (DOORBELL CHIMES) - (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
PHARMACIST: Connolly, your prescription's ready.
Hi. I'm...
I'm sorry I couldn't help notice you
when I was standing over there.
I don't mean to intrude, and I don't know your situation,
but if you're going through something difficult,
if you're with someone who's hurting you,
I have resources that could help.
Okay. Thanks.
SHOPPER: Yeah.
Often, we get trapped in a cycle
and we think what's happening to us is okay.
Mm-hmm.
And I just want to tell you, it's not.
I appreciate it. That's not what this is.
(SOFTLY) Okay.
So often, women deny what's happening--
I am not a fucking mirror!
- What? - I have my own problems, okay?
- SHOPPER: Okay. - All right?
Is that okay with you?
Sorry.
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
You got a good view there, Beaker?
Beaker? Who's...
He's a Muppet.
- Do I look like him? - A little.
- And that's bad? - It's not good.
♪ (MELLOW GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(SIGHS)
(DOORBELL CHIMES)
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(DOOR HANDLE CLANGS)
(VAN DOORS RATTLING)
Whoa. That's intense.
Who the fuck are you?
Fleury. Bordeaux sent me.
Let me see your badge. And reach slowly.
(CHUCKLES) I don't have to do shit slowly, Kemosabe.
You can't discharge that firearm while it's still in the holster.
But I will do it slowly...
because I'm polite.
I should get a call if somebody's coming.
- (GUN THUDS) - (SIGHS)
Well, Bordeaux thought you might need some backup.
- (VAN DOORS CLOSING) - So, what's your preferred form of greeting?
Handshake, fist bump, hug?
You a hugger, Economos?
No, I'm not a hugger.
- So, what'll it be? - What'll what be?
What form of greeting?
I don't know. Maybe just nod, like...
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, that's cool. That's real cool.
Hey, we got a cool guy in the van, huh? (CHUCKLES)
Ginger Cool.
You mind if I call you that? Ginger Cool?
Yeah, I really do fucking mind.
(CHUCKLES)
Mm.
(POT THUDS)
(SNIFFS)
(SIGHS)
- (GROANS) Oh, God. - (DOOR CLOSING)
Mm. Can I get some of that?
The coffee.
Sure.
(GROANS)
(PEACEMAKER SIGHS)
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
(POT THUDS)
LANGSTON FLEURY: Who's the fox?
ECONOMOS: It's Leota Adebayo.
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm!
She's just a friend of ours.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Did I just accidentally sexualize someone
that you respect as a friend, Economos?
It's fine. Whatever.
Well, it's just 'cause I was thinking about
tapping that ass... (CHUCKLES) ...you know?
It's weird they got you monitoring your own crew.
They do that, you know.
I know.
Make sure your loyalty is first and foremost to the A.
- ARGUS. - (SOFTLY) Fuck.
You having a crisis of conscience here, Economos?
No.
Is that why Bordeaux sent me to babysit you?
I don't know, man. Look.
I'm just doing my job like I do every day, okay?
- I don't give a shit. - 'Course, not.
You're Ginger Cool.
Are you fucking kidding me?
- You don't want me to come in? - It's, uh... (SIGHS)
It's kind of messy in there.
What's going on?
(SOFT TAPS ON DOOR)
(CHIRPS)
Hey, Eagly.
- (SQUAWKS) - Hey! (SCOFFS)
- He likes you. - I'm not so sure.
FLEURY: What's the deal with the parrot?
- That's an eagle. - Hmm?
It's a bald eagle.
It's the symbol of America.
Are you telling me you don't recognize
what kind of bird that is?
Okay, you obviously have not read my dossier.
I have bird blindness.
(SCOFFS)
Bird blindness?
I can't tell the difference
between one type of bird and another.
Okay, but a duck and an eagle are totally different sizes.
Yeah, well, they look the same size to me, man.
(SIGHS) What about, like, a hummingbird?
Tiny bird? Incredibly fast wings? Hovers?
ECONOMOS: Yeah, see?
Yeah, I only know about that because I read it.
- ECONOMOS: Yeah. - To me, they look and move
just like any other bird.
- Wow. - FLEURY: Bird blindness.
It's my sole weakness.
(MONITOR BEEPING)
FLEURY: What is she showing him?
Um... Oh, that's...
That could be anything, man.
- LEOTA: Quantum what? - PEACEMAKER: Unfolding Chamber.
It's a dimensional portal
that leads to 99 other universes.
- In your bedroom? - It's my dad's bedroom.
Yours now?
Yeah, fucking mine now, whatever. (SIGHS)
I don't use it much.
I let Eagly fly around there sometimes
when it's too cold outside.
- It's my dad's. - You never told me about it.
Never thought about it, Ads. Jeez, it's not that big a deal.
Get the fuck out, it's not.
I grew up with it. It's normal to me.
It's like you being a fucking Christian Scientist or whatever.
- I'm not Christian Science. - What are you then?
Well, I don't practice much, but I'm Methodist.
- Oh yeah? - LEOTA: Yeah.
I don't know what the fuck that is!
Okay? Normal to you, but to me, it's wacky Martian shit.
You cannot seriously be comparing me being Methodist
to you having a secret dimensional portal
- in your bedroom right now. - I see your point!
Fine. Fucking congratulations, Ads.
You're the winner of the conversation.
We'll get you your gold medal and your congratulatory watch,
and, you know, your fucking many awards
to shower you with. Let's all get together
and do a big fucking dance routine.
Yeah, that's right. Great.
Just 40,000 people fucking dancing,
just about how fucking awesome you are
at doing conversations!
Shit!
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
Are you having a breakdown right now?
I don't know. (BREATHES HEAVILY)
What's going on with you?
I had a rough night.
I don't want to make it worse,
but you're being monitored right now.
- By who? - Rick Flag. Senior.
He's the head of ARGUS now.
♪ (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Does he know that I, uh-- - Killed his son? Yeah.
Fuck me.
Fuck. How do you know all this?
A friend inside.
I'm just gonna pretend like I don't know who that is.
(MONITOR BEEPING)
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
- You want my advice? - I don't fucking know.
Number one, this portal?
Don't use it because, somehow, they always know when you do.
- Number two, give it to them. - It's mine!
They're gonna treat you like you're hiding
a nuclear weapon in your house, Chris.
Just tell them you don't know exactly what it is.
It's your dad's, or whatever.
Because if you don't, they're going to use this
as an excuse to send you back to prison.
Hey, guys.
Who's the nerd?
That is Adrian Chase.
They're, uh... He's just a friend.
(SCOFFS) That motherfucker look like
he caught all the Pokémen.
- You know what I'm saying? - No, I don't.
Super nerd.
Pokémon is plural, not Pokémen.
Well, I'm sorry.
Pokémen's grammar is not my bag, man.
When, uh, you were learning that,
I had two hot bitches sucking my dick.
Mm.
Okay, well, I'll see y'all guys tonight.
- John's coming home party. - Yeah, we'll be there.
Eagly! (WHISTLES) Come on!
VIGILANTE: So, what are we doing?
PEACEMAKER: I need a hand with something.
What's all this?
- I had some people over, is all. - (SCOFFS)
What?
Nothing.
- (TOILET FLUSHING) - Oh!
- Hey. - PEACEMAKER: Hey.
Uh, Zora.
Would you do me a huge favor?
Would you mind getting these people out of here for me?
Sure.
Thank you. (CHUCKLES)
- Well, that's gross. - What?
There was no time at all between her flushing that toilet
and coming out of the bathroom.
That means she didn't wash her hands at all.
- Okay. - "Okay"? (SCOFFS)
Personally, I don't think gonorrhea hands are "okay."
- What are you pissed off about? - I'm not pissed off.
Fine, 'cause I don't need it today, Adrian, okay?
Fine. Why am I here?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Dude, I fucked up.
Oh, I see. You're in trouble and you call me.
But you have a party
and you fuck a bunch of major hotties
and then you don't even invite your best friend?
Why do you always pretend like you're not pissed off
- when it's obvious? - I'm not pissed off.
I didn't say I was pissed off.
Is it surprising? Yes.
Is it outrageous? Absolutely, it is!
Yeah, I was depressed.
Okay? It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
I was just... drowning my sorrows in flesh.
It had nothing to do with friendship.
And to be quite honest, Adrian,
you don't even seem that into sex.
Dude, I'm not into sex because, like, it's sex.
I'm into sex because, like a lot of people,
it's an opportunity to bond with my best friend.
That's not like a lot of people.
Well, I'm not a pervert, is what I'm saying.
I don't quote-unquote "like" sex.
Shut the door.
- (HINGES CREAKING) - ♪ (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Are you going in? - I'm being monitored.
- What? - They're gonna know.
Know what?
- Fuck it. - (KEYPAD BEEPING)
(LOCK CHIMES)
(RADAR BEEPING)
- Oh, fuck. - Whoa.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Fleury. Yeah, we see it.
Yeah, me and Ginger Cool are on this shit.
- Jesus Christ. - FLEURY: Yeah, sure.
Bordeaux wants to know are you going to that thing tonight?
- The thing with Smith? - Yeah, I know what she means.
Yes. Why?
He says he'll be there with bells on.
He said he'll be there "with bells on"?
Well, I added the bells part. Sounded more poetic.
Okay, Agent, don't do that. Don't embellish shit.
Sorry, Chief. It won't happen again.
Flag thinks we should keep Economos
in the cold on this.
Okay.
SASHA BORDEAUX: So, after he and Smith leave,
I'm sending you and a team of agents
to do a full scrub of Smith's home.
- Got it? - FLEURY: Right.
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
She says to hold.
- So, do nothing? - That's right.
Okay.
♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
So, then you killed your own doppelganger?
- Yeah. - From another dimension?
Yes.
That's exactly the same as ours, except everything's better?
- Yep. - Dude, that's sick!
- Believe me, it's not. - But why?
I'd love to meet a me that's me except better.
(SCOFFS) Dude, believe me, you don't want to meet yourself.
It's chilling as fuck.
Well, yeah, sure, if you kill yourself.
I'm talking about before that, man.
Looking into your own eyes, it just fucks you up.
No way.
Here it is.
We gotta get rid of it. I don't want my other-world dad and brother finding it.
Yeah, they'd probably kill you if they did.
Cool helmet!
♪ Back the way I came ♪
♪ ("EVIL THOUGHTS" BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING) ♪
♪ Nothin' looks the same ♪
♪ And the breadcrumbs I've left along the way ♪
- ♪ I have lost my way ♪ - ♪ Now have been eaten away ♪
♪ By the birds I have left In my past ♪
- ♪ The past I've run from ♪ - ♪ Should I proceed? ♪
♪ Should I proceed my darling? ♪
♪ Or turn back around? ♪
♪ Lord, let me know What I should do ♪
♪ Evil thoughts Evil powers seek my mind ♪
♪ I feel lost every time, oh! ♪
♪ Evil force Evil ways close behind ♪
♪ I need love I need love, I need love! ♪
♪ All I know ♪
♪ Isn't always the truth, yeah ♪
♪ All I know ♪
♪ Everything ♪
♪ Isn't always the case, oh ♪
♪ All I know ♪
♪ Isn't always the truth ♪
♪ All I know ♪
♪ Isn't always the case ♪
♪ As the days grow long ♪
- Fuck off! - ♪ (SONG STOPS) ♪
(GROWLS SOFTLY)
(CHUCKLES) Who's that guy?
That's just some rude motherfucker
who I say hi to every time, and never says hi back!
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
(PEACEMAKER SIGHS)
(PHONE CLICKS)
♪ (GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(LAUGHS)
Oh, Chris, turn that off. Oh my God.
Come on. Come on. Stop.
♪ (GENTLE MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
♪ ("REAPERCUSSION" BY THE CRUEL INTENTIONS PLAYING) ♪
♪ When you drink When you smoke ♪
♪ When you scream, When you cu-cu-curse ♪
♪ Reapercussion ♪
♪ Gotta lie, gettin' high Gotta fight till it hurts ♪
♪ Echo in my mind Of chaos left behind ♪
♪ The melodies within They're kickin' in ♪
♪ (THRASH METAL GUITAR RIFF) ♪
- ♪ Songs from the dead ♪ - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Playing in my head ♪ - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Evil melodies Keep pushing me ♪
♪ For retaliation ♪
♪ Reapercussion ♪
- (MONITOR BEEPING) - ♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(WHISTLES)
- Let's go. - No, no, wait, wait.
Let's give him a few more minutes,
make sure he doesn't come back for something.
Come back for something?
Yeah, he's going to a party, a get-together with friends.
Oftentimes, people will buy a gift
like a bottle of champagne, a-- a housewarming thing.
Isn't a housewarming gift solely for people
- who just moved into a new home? - FLEURY: No.
It's any gift that you give to someone in their house.
- It warms the house. - No, it's not.
It's just for people moving into a new place.
- That guy-- - Vega.
- Vega. He's right. - None of this matters.
The point is, is that when I go to someone's house,
I will often buy a gift, then I forget the gift.
And then I don't remember
until I'm halfway to the place I'm going.
Well, personally, though, I just say fuck it.
I forgot it. I just want to party.
- Get lit. - Yeah, I love to get lit.
Bonus, you can drink the champagne afterwards
by yourself.
Well, that's you.
And that's probably 50 percent of people.
But a lot of people are more considerate,
and they will come back.
So in case this hick is one of those people,
we won't get caught with our pants down.
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(FOOT TAPPING ON FLOOR)
Stop bouncing.
♪ (PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(DOORBELL CHIMES)
- Hey. - Hey.
Hold on.
Will you text the others and tell them
to meet us on the roof?
Sure.
ECONOMOS: I gotta say,
you're not really the person I expected to play host.
Well, Adebayo lives in a snake pit.
Adrian lives with his mother,
who might be rotting Norma Bates-style
for all I know.
And every time I go to Chris's,
Eagly literally tries to kill me.
(CHUCKLES) Fucking Eagly.
Oh, this is surprisingly nice.
EMILIA HARCOURT: Yeah, just look out for the dog shit.
Asshole neighbors bring their dogs up.
- I like dogs. - You like dog shit?
- No. - Hey, guys.
- How did you get up here? - VIGILANTE: Fire escape.
I got beer.
Don't be climbing up my fire escape, dude.
(LAUGHS)
Where do you get this stuff from?
It's funny, right?
- Give me one of those. - Yeah.
(VIGILANTE SIGHS)
- Want one? - Duh.
(SHATTERS)
VIGILANTE: Oh, okay.
- Here you go. - Right, yeah.
Yeah. Oh, okay.
Just hand it to him.
Yeah, no, I'll just-- I'll just hand it to him.
Probably the best thing. Should've done that right away.
VIGILANTE: Yeah.
- Motherfuckers! (LAUGHS) - ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Econogoat! - What up!
Back home where he belongs.
The missing piece of the puzzle, man. There he is!
Hey.
- Did you guys come together? - No, dude.
We met in the stairwell on the way up.
Oh! (CHUCKLES) Okay, okay.
- Chips and dips and brewskis... - Leota.
...we doin' it up in style!
Hey, Ads.
- Good sir. - Oh. Mm.
- Miss you, girl. Yeah. - You too.
Wait, what happened to your eye?
Oh, nothing. It's stupid.
- Hey. - Ooh, yeah.
- To the 11th Street Kids. - ECONOMOS: Yeah.
We came, we motherfuckin' rocked it.
(CHUCKLES)
No matter how far away we are from each other,
even our boy Economos,
no one will ever break us apart.
- Yes! - Yeah!
- ECONOMOS: Yeah! - Right on! Fuck yeah, bro!
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
All right, Mexicali, you take your gadget,
scan for any anomalies you find throughout that house.
Ponyboy, don't let them out of your sight.
Titties, I want you to take the front door.
Encino Man, you take the back door.
- Got it? - Yeah.
But not the fucking names, dude.
You can't just call us that.
Where do you think we are? Fucking Berkeley?
How else am I gonna remember you?
You know what? You just got demoted.
Your new name is Barely Legal.
(SCOFFS) Fuck off, man.
Okay, now it's Kewpie Doll.
Keep it up.
- Fuck. - Let's go.
♪ (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(PINS CLICKING)
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(GADGET CHIMING)
(GADGET TRILLING)
What even is that thing?
Measures traces of non-terrestrial energies.
(GADGET BEEPING)
I'm picking up something.
- (UNFOLDING CHAMBER PULSATING) - (GADGET TRILLING)
(GADGET WHIRRING RAPIDLY)
- What the fuck? - Jesus.
This is a dimensional discrepancy.
This is major, man.
♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
- (VEGA SCREAMS, GROANS) - ♪ (THRILLING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
KLINE: (IN DISTANCE) Jesus!
(EAGLY SCREECHING)
VEGA: Shoot it! Shoot it!
KLINE: I'm fucking trying! It's a bird, dude!
- (SCREECHES) - (GUNSHOT)
- KLINE: Fuck! - (VEGA SCREAMS)
VEGA: Fucking bird!
(SCREAMS)
(GUNSHOTS)
Kewpie!
(KLINE GRUNTS)
- (EAGLY SCREECHES) - (VEGA SCREAMS)
(SQUAWKS)
Titties! Encino Man! Get in here!
(VEGA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
I can't tell how big this thing is.
(VEGA SCREAMS)
Fucking bird blindness.
(FLEURY PANTING, SCREAMS)
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
(GASPS, GROANS)
(WHIMPERS, SCREAMS)
♪ (THRILLING MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(FLEURY PANTING)
- (EAGLY SCREECHES) - (FLEURY GRUNTS)
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
(GROANS)
(SCREAMS, WHIMPERS)
(SCREECHES)
(FLEURY GRUNTS, GROANS)
Hold on. Oh, fuck!
- (GROANS) Fuck! - (EAGLY SCREECHING)
(SIGHS)
(EAGLY SQUAWKS)
- Thank God. Fuck. - (WHEEZING)
Hang in there, Titties. You're gonna be okay.
(GURGLES, GRUNTS)
- (IN STRAINED VOICE) Look out. - Huh?
- (SCREECHES) - (FLEURY SCREAMS)
- (SHARP THUD) - ♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
(CHIRPS)
- ♪ ("DIRTY MONEY" BY IDA MARIA PLAYING) ♪ - ♪ Pay me all your dirty money ♪
♪ I'm your favorite monkey Watch me go! ♪
- (VOCALIST CHUCKLES) - ♪ Help, help, help ♪
♪ Cocaine Shoulda seen the coke get ♪
♪ Lined up in the backstage At my show ♪
♪ Everybody wanna be full makeup And on TV ♪
♪ Talking 'bout your jealousy ♪
♪ Mum, I know I look insane ♪
♪ But they all promised me Champagne ♪
♪ Swear they want me For my brain ♪
♪ Pay me all your dirty money ♪
♪ I'm your favorite monkey Watch me go ♪
♪ Cocaine Shoulda seen the coke get ♪
♪ Lined up in the backstage At my show ♪
- ♪ Girls in line Wanna be a star ♪ - (LAUGHS)
♪ Honey You're not getting far ♪
- ♪ Not with psychotherapy ♪ - ♪ (SONG QUIETENS) ♪
♪ Please, don't put Your parents through ♪
♪ Naughty days in Malibu ♪
♪ Coming off your ecstasy ♪
♪ Pay me all your dirty money ♪
♪ I'm your favorite monkey Watch me go... ♪
(HARCOURT CLEARS THROAT)
Hey.
I pulled you over here with my fishing line.
Yes, I saw that.
Maybe you think that's disrespectful.
I don't know.
You could have torn a hole in my shirt.
It's not cool.
(SLURRING) Oh, man.
It ain't been the same since you left, man.
- Fuck you. - (LAUGHS) I'm serious.
Look, I know sometimes you think you don't matter,
but you do.
To all of us.
To everyone here.
Do you guys get together like this a lot?
No, not all of us, just individually.
So me and Chris, obviously.
- ECONOMOS: Yeah, obviously. - Me and Harcourt.
- ECONOMOS: Harcourt. - Mm.
And Chris and Adrian, Chris and Harcourt.
- Chris and Harcourt? - (SNAPS FINGERS)
(SQUEALS, LAUGHS)
What is up with that?
- Your guess is as good as mine. - (BOTH LAUGH)
- Oof. - You doing okay, though?
Uh, hello. Yes.
Mm, you seem a little stressed.
Okay, well, it's the job.
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
- Well, shit. Quit. - ♪ (SONG FADES OUT) ♪
- Quit? - Yeah.
Yeah, do what I'm doing.
I don't need anybody else.
I just go off and forge my own path.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(CHUCKLES) You making any money doing that?
- (SNORTS) No. - (ECONOMOS LAUGHS)
Not yet, but-- but-- but I will.
- Ah. - And what you gonna do?
You just gonna-- I don't know,
just sit around and be scared your whole life?
Yes.
I've had crippling anxiety since I was a kid.
I don't think I'm gonna change that much now.
Shit.
No, what are you doing? What are you fucking doing?
- I love you, brother. - You love alcohol. (CHUCKLES)
(FAINT RUMBLING)
KLINE: (MUFFLED) Fleury!
Fleury!
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Fleury! - Mm.
- Fleury! - (FLEURY GROANS)
(SIGHS) A fucking duck attacked me.
We gotta get these people to a hospital.
We gotta go.
♪ ("THIS TIME IT'S LOVE" BY D'MOLLS PLAYING) ♪
PEACEMAKER: Even Evergreen's pretty from above, huh?
HARCOURT: Hm.
PEACEMAKER: Hey.
What happened?
No big deal.
Some dude at a bar fucking with me.
(CHUCKLES)
Like that time a couple months ago?
- Sure. - Yeah.
Or like the first time we talked,
you know, in that bar?
Mm, the bar you fucking followed me into.
That's the one. (CHUCKLES) Yes.
Yeah. Yes, I did.
I followed you in there 'cause I thought you were cool.
- Cool? - Yeah.
- Sure. - I still think you're cool.
Okay. (CHUCKLES)
Anyway...
That bar, filled with not great people.
It's not a great spot.
You know, I figured
if somebody was looking for a fight,
that'd be a real good place to find one.
- That's all. - So that's your theory here?
PEACEMAKER: Not a theory.
Just a thought I had I couldn't shake.
That I go around trying to get into fights?
I don't know what you do.
You wear a costume and go out
and beat the shit out of people.
(SIGHS) Maybe it takes one to know one, okay?
That's not happening. That would be fucking stupid.
I'm just saying, you've just been so upset
ever since Task Force X disbanded.
I'm worried about you.
- Worried about me. - What?
Yeah.
You know, we both know that's what you'd like.
What?
Yeah, you'd like me to be some sort of
damaged, broken bird
'cause, you know,
water seeks its own level and all that.
Sorry.
I'm not as fucked up as you, Chris.
I never said you were.
All right. Uh, fuck this. Mm.
- ♪ This time it's love ♪ - ♪ This time it's love ♪
♪ This time it's love ♪
♪ Sometimes my heart feels Like beating through my chest ♪
♪ Sometimes we'll be apart... ♪
- ♪ (SONG FADES OUT) ♪ - (BREATHES DEEPLY)
- (YELPS) - (LOUD THUD)
(GROANS)
Eagly, were you fucking shit up again?
(GRUNTS)
(PANTS)
(TALONS STEPPING)
(EAGLY CHIRPING)
Hey. Come on.
(COOS)
My guy, you're the best.
- (COOS) - You're the best.
- (SCREECHES) - (GRUNTS) Hey, hey!
Hey, hey.
- (EAGLY SQUAWKS) - Sorry.
(SIGHS)
♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(KEYPAD BEEPING)
(LOCK CHIMES, BUZZES)
(UNFOLDING CHAMBER PULSATING)
- (KEYPAD BEEPING) - (LOCK CHIMING)
♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
AUGGIE SMITH: Yeah, Keith, you find anything?
No, no, no. No one knows where he is.
You call that Karen girl, the one he's--
Yeah. Okay.
I'm trying to think anywhere else he could be. I...
What's the blood in the library from?
You don't think it's those pills again, do you?
(CELL PHONE CHIMING)
♪ ("WE DON'T NEED A CURE" BY HARDCORE SUPERSTAR PLAYING) ♪
♪ Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
♪ Won't be complicated Won't be compromised ♪
♪ No shame in who you are ♪
♪ Trying to confuse us We don't need a cure ♪
♪ You know you're not alone ♪
♪ If you say it, then mean it ♪
♪ If you mean it, then do it ♪
♪ This one's for the outcast For those about to fall ♪
♪ This is for the lowlife This is for us all ♪
♪ Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
♪ This is for the outcast ♪
- ♪ We don't need a cure ♪ - ♪ (SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
Pokémon is plural, not Pokémen.
Well, I'm sorry.
Pokémen's grammar is not my bag, man.
When you were learning that,
I had two hot bitches sucking my dick.
What did they look like?
One was blonde and one was bald.
Why was she bald?
What were their names?
Gertrude, Francine. The Peppermint twins.
- I'll never forget. - Yeah? Where was this?
In Portland, Oregon.
- Real hot? - Super hot.